I don’t normally talk about things that bother me but lately there has been a lot on my mind. And I am worrying big time about Sierra and this pregnancy.
We went to sleep one night and I had very clear visions of what was going on.
Sierra and I went to the hospital because there was a few complications. She couldn’t feel the baby move at all and we both started to panic. Curtis came to do an ultrasound scan and told us there that we were having twins but the worst part was he then told us that one wasn’t going to make it. It tore me and Sierra to pieces.
I couldn’t believe that this was even happening. The pair of us were completely distraught and I could her saying to me in a teary voice “I’m sorry” 😞
I just held her because she literally felt like everything was her fault.
Curtis then said to us that if they don’t act fast this will not only be fatal to the babies but to Sierra too. I can’t lose her. I just can’t😢.
He’d finally said to us that we’ve got to do this. Both me and Sierra were scared but we had to face this together.
Every bit of me was breaking. I wanted to hold onto her soo tight but I just couldn’t. I was ready to walk out the room because I couldn’t stand my wife being in this much pain and what to expect when the babies come out.
She had the babies. And it was horrific. She held both of them as one was completely lifeless and the other weak, she felt absolutely helpless to them both. And there was nothing I could do.
They took our first one away after we had our moments with her and it was so heartbreaking. And the other who was extremely weak had to be put in the incubator which was also hard for the both of us.
But things took an even more worse turn as Sierra was losing a lot of blood and consciousness. They brought more doctors in and they told me to leave the room. I didn’t want to as I needed to be with my wife. Watching everything unfold behind the door, I just broke down behind the door and shouted in pain.
Everything that I made, the family we have, it felt like it was all being taken away from me before my eyes. Curtis then said to me “Prince I am really sorry to say this but your wife is in a critical condition and we’ve had to put her in a coma”. I just said to him “Please, Please don’t do this to me”.
…Please, don’t leave me Sierra. Don’t leave me…
Then I woke up shouting, “don’t leave me Sierra”. Sierra jumped out of her sleep and said to me “Baby I am right here. I am right here.” And I just sat there and sobbed.
She asked me what’s going on and I told her that I was worrying about the pregnancy and worrying about losing our baby and her too. She said “Prince I am not going anywhere and you have nothing to worry about. This baby is going to be just fine. She put my hand against her belly and I could feel the kicks “this baby isn’t going anywhere either.”
I spent the rest of the night fearing the worst. And all I want in this moment at this big age, all I want is my Mom. To tell me that everything is going to be ok.