I just need someone to hold me and tell me everything is going to be okay. Or just hold me and say nothing at all. To fall asleep in someone’s embrace because God I just need some kind of loving physical touch. Yet, here I sit alone again. I could cry forever. I want to just stay home and never leave my bed for anything. This time I did it to myself. Words that escape uncontrollably like vomit. I immediately regret saying them yet I still do. So alone I sit. No one to talk to at 1am. My heart I completely broken. Shattered all over and the pieces seem impossible to put back together. God please sooner rather than later. Come quickly Jesus because I need you so badly. Please give me my best friend back. I need her. I need her to lay in bed with me and hold my hand without saying a word on my bad days. I need her to delight in my best days with joy and laughter and all of the special jokes between us. In a couple weeks on 10/10 it will be 10 years that my daddy is gone and my heart is extra sad and there’s no one else I’d want to go with me for support as I lay flowers on his grave. Super struggling lately and it is REALLY hard to do any of this without anyone by my side as support. I don’t know what to do. Lost completely. I’m angry and sad and everything in between.















