Life of an Engineer

What happened over 40 years in Engineering

[professional1977]

Petty Corruption?

For several years I worked in Winnipeg Manitoba. By strange circumstances it was also the city I was born in but left when I was one month old.

Winnipeg is actually a fairly wealthy place. It was the center of wheat board trading, insurance, investment and all sorts of lucrative financial stuff. For decades every Sony device sold in Canada went through there and was marked up significantly.

There is a world class Ballet troupe and a Symphony Orchestra. It is in the middle of dead flat Prairie with hot summers and painfully cold winters.

It is also just like a small town where everyone knows everyone and networking and connections start in grade school. I worked in a construction and construction materials company. I was told the job there was to be an engineering manager, but after I went to see I was told that job had been given to a young guy who they would appreciate if I helped him develop his skills. The money was the same and I was stupid and stayed. The reason the young guy was there was he was the son of the City Manager.

In many cities the city manager is a non-elected bureaucrat who holds all the actual day to day power. My employer supplied materials and things directly to the city without bidding on them, and this young guy was the tit for the tat. There was a lot of city money coming in.

I learned a lot about ethics and law there as the bosses made an art of skirting both. Over time I was getting more and more uncomfortable but I learned there was no way around the "culture" in the office. The usual outlets to report such things were filled with people's friends and even family.

The last big event that turned me was a huge project. The local newspaper was part of a big national chain. They were building a new printing facility. It was huge, expensive and everything had to be built around and for the press machine being made in Germany. I had been moved to sales as I could do preliminary designs and price them in one go. I would go to design meetings and offer alternatives and rough costs and follow up quickly. The project was being done by a company called "The Austin Company". I had never heard of them. At lunch with their project managers I found out they never bid jobs to tenders. They always negotiated with the owners and did turnkey work. The company was one of the biggest in the world and very rich. I was impressed.

The project was really interesting. As is often the case in Winnipeg they liked to build in the winter. The ground is nice a hard rather than the usual horrible sticky mud. I prepared a scheme with the architects to prefabricate the whole thing so It could be built like a kit in any weather. I worked hard and refined it and made a very thorough price estimate. That was taken by the sales manager and the bosses fiddled it a bit before submission.

The next day the head of the office was smiling and said we got the job. I asked how was that possible, it was only submitted the day before. He then told me that we always were getting the job regardless. Our company was owned by a huge international construction materials conglomerate which also, surprise, owned the Austin Company.

That upset me in a strange way. First I was elated to get the job as it was a tricky one and I had put a lot into it. Next I was pissed that I had worked so hard when the bosses knew the fix was in. Finally I felt more than a bit dirty.

In my defense I did not know and did the best job I could so the product was a clean effort. I do not know what the fiddles in the prices were or what transpired on phone calls, but my part was clean. Still the smell of cheating was in the air.

There were more things later. Like the provincial lottery company building a palace for themselves without bidding it out. I was already making plans for an exit. When the for sale sign went up in front of my house I started to get calls from other companies about job offers. There was a gentlemen's agreement to not poach people from other firms but they knew where I lived and when my house went on the market. I wanted out of the city. It was too much.

So I left and headed back West. A new baby and my wife in two cars driving through a spring blizzard.

[professional1977]

Prestressed PhD #1

This did not happen to me, but I was told this over beer by the person who it did happen to.

Prestressed Concrete is an important technology. You cannot drive over most bridges, or Park your car in the city without encountering it. I worked for over 10 years in the industry and became quite an expert. It is a bit strange, interesting and not a little dangerous. The basic idea is you stretch very small strong wire cables inside concrete shapes to apply compression force to it. Concrete is very strong in compression and rather weak in tension. Apply enough compression and it does not see much if any tension. That is good as without tension it does not crack. Well made concrete will last millennia. No lie there many Roman buildings are made with concrete. Look up the Roman Pantheon. They invented it.

When you work with this method you learn a few basics. For example you pull the stressing strands to almost 90% of breaking strength at some points. The strands are strong, far more than carbon fiber for example. How is 270,000 psi for you. CF is good for 100,000. Hah.

The story begins:

A prestressed concrete fabricator got a contract to build a series of large underground rapid train stations in a downtown area. They were to supply big girders to span the stations and the tracks under the city streets. A very important job. Not a little intimidating. So they hired a PhD engineer to do the design work who claimed to be an expert.

Thing is many PhDs are divas and the most extreme are narcissists of the "I know everything" type. It is an insult to criticize or question their opinion or capabilities especially if you only have a Bachelor's degree. A section of that is they may not ask for help as that is weakness. So this guy went into his office and started to work. Weeks later the management got nervous. It was taking a long time and nothing was coming out to complete the drawings that need to be submitted. Nervousness gave way to worry and serious concern.

They sent a young engineer in to ask him how it was going. The mission was to look over his shoulder to see what was wrong. The PhD said he almost had it figured and would soon be ready with the calculations. The young guy said; "I have been told by management to help you so we can get this done." This guy was the person with which I was having the beer. The Doctor of Engineering reluctantly showed him his basic work.

Prestressing steel is special. It is stupid strong and when it is made it is stretched past its elastic limit to just shy of breaking. This is called strain hardening. Normal reinforcing steel is pretty strong, but it is only a fraction of that of prestressing steel. 18% as strong in most cases.

At the time the standard cables were 7 wire strands of a gross 1/2" diameter with an area of 0.153 sq inch. There were also 1/2" reinforcing bars with an area of about 0.2 sq inch.

The punch line is this person was no expert and had never worked with prestress before. His ego assumed he could figure it out so when asked he said of course he was an expert. He had no idea what a prestressing strand was. He had been trying to prestress big girders with normal reinforcing bars and found it very hard. Hard because it was impossible. He was fired.

We had a good laugh over this, but it was a serious problem. I never heard what happened to this guy. I expect due to the sensitive nature he was let go quietly and the engineering association may not have been told. Today that kind of thing is met with suspension and prohibition from work. He probably went to teach university in a far off country.

Every profession has its Divas. Senior engineers object to comment or criticism from underlings. Even just questioning if they checked this or that may trigger them. It is made worse by how up the academic ladder they climbed.

I have encountered several PhDs over the years. Most were trouble. One was brilliant.

[professional1977]

A Professional Engineer

That's what I am. It is a regulated title like doctor or nurse or lawyer. In order to call myself that I have to prove competence and experience with my associations as well as have the right University Degrees.

Engineering is "useful" science. Science is using numbers and numerical models to understand the inner working of things. Engineering is using science to build things. It is everywhere.

I must admit there are good engineers and bad ones. I hope that I am one of the good ones. Nobody has died on my watch.

Historically "Engineers" were military ranks that were responsible for the engines of war. Catapults and siege platforms to attack castles and that sort of thing. With the industrial revolution skill sets were needed to tend boilers and locomotives so that is why those people are called engineers. When the need arose to design and build things with iron and eventually steel like bridges those with the skill were called Civil Engineers to distinguish them from the military.

Most military engineers are allowed to use the title and term "engineer" to describe themselves while serving. Otherwise it is an offense to call yourself that. That is a bit of historical hang over.

To be clear I must call myself a "professional engineer". In the US they append P.E. to their names, and business cards and email signatures. In Canada its P. Eng. to distinguish us from gym teachers. At my peak I was registered in 5 provincial jurisdictions in Canada and one US State.

Ok That is out of the way.

My University Degree is B. Sc. C.E. Baccalaureate of Science in Civil Engineering. I got it in a big State Ivy in the Eastern US in the last century. The local Uni gives out B. Ap Sc. Baccalaureate in Applied Science. From that take there is a lot of science involved. Oh and math like differential equations and other nightmarish experiences. Everyone's experience is different but it is rather hard to complete.

I should have been a lawyer. Easier to do and far better pay.

I want to say I am good at it. Over the years I made other people quite a lot of money from things I built or just designed. I have even built things that a few people thought could not be done.

My brother got a Baccalaureate and a Master's degree in Electrical Engineering. MSc EE. He did computer science and never had to join any professional associations. I think because back then computers could not kill you.

He worked for a big computer company in Massachusetts for a lot more money that I was making. Years later he told me a lament. He worked in a team of very good talented people designing a faster more powerful and efficient computer. It was a corporate point of pride. When the marketing people got involved they had to hobble it so it would not erode the sales of the old design. Only a few years later the company was out of business and their machine was eclipsed by small PC types. He said at least I had some bridges and buildings standing to point to.

I do have some bridges that I had a part in. I designed the big girders spanning almost a hundred feet in this one big one. Many small ones. I also have parking garages and high rise curtain walls and even some amusement rides. I have done a lot of stuff. Some of it was really interesting. Much was routine and repetitive. At least they exist physically.

My intent here is to tell war stories. Like the time I caught a PhD engineer in a classic Fubar and was punished for it. Or the time people sat around a boardroom table and realized they completely messed up a new product roll out and had nothing for the factory to build. Or the time a huge client asked for one thing and sales tried to sell them another thing that was more comfortable to do.

For better or worse I was part of the construction industry. Aside from War it is the most competitive and yes often corrupt human activity there is. I have seen deep into it. Good and bad.

[professional1977]

Adventures with PhDs #2

This was my first personal encounter with a PhD engineer.

I was working on a parking garage in Alberta. My job was to analyze and detail the prefabricated concrete beams, columns and floor members of a 5 story garage. Basically the only thing I was not responsible for was the overall stability of the structure and some stair towers. I had to calculate it anyway as I needed to provide all the connections that carried these loads to the stair towers along the sides. These stair towers were being built of conventional cast in place concrete and were to provide the lateral load resistance so the thing would not blow over in a strong wind.

The overall design was under a consulting engineering firm who designed these stair towers. They also showed where expansion joints were to be. Expansion joints are needed as structures grow and shrink by changes in temperature. A 60 foot long beam is shorter at -40 in winter than it would be in summer heat. They are needed.

The person who represented the consultant was a PhD. He designed the towers and was going to review and approve my calculations.

My concern started when I looked at the locations of the expansion joints. There was a stair tower along one side of each section defined by a set of joints. The idea of these joints is no load is transmitted horizontally across them so that they are free to move with temperature. Wind loads work horizontally. There were either 4 or 6 groups of platforms mutually isolated and supported along only one side. That seemed wrong to me. Each section was eccentrically loaded. As I had to derive the loads going to the stair towers I assumed each section went to one tower straight on.

The PhD reviewed my calculations and was fairly complementary about them. "I can see exactly what you are thinking!" His review was in agreement with my assumptions of those loads. Oh and these were all written out on many pages of graph note paper. Equations written out with answers and stuff and code reference numbers sketches of shapes and details. I used a pocket calculator. No big computers and such PCs had yet to be invented.

So I asked him about the expansion joints. They are needed obviously, but supporting the platforms along one side meant they would twist under wind would they not? His response was of the nature don't you worry about it. I asked he said it would be fine. He was a PhD and I was a junior engineer. Later in my career I found eccentric lateral loads could be a real problem to deal with. They required extra bracing and details in specific areas to deal with. This project had nothing like that.

That garage was dismantled decades ago and condos sit where it was. It never blew over I guess.

[professional1977]

A racist eh?

I was managing a department with many POCs. That's people of color. I think it silly to call people a minority when there are more of "them" than "us". I am a white person for the record. White people are perhaps 1/8th of the global population. Probably less.

I had a problem with a CAD operator who was not pulling his weight. Actually we spent more man-hours checking and correcting his work than he did preparing it and he was slow. He didn't really care as he had allies in the staff who usually covered for him, but man-hour numbers don't lie.

It is not that easy to get rid of long term employees. It takes a few rounds of performance reviews and backup documentation and memos. I did all that. I hoped he would at least try to improve as new people take time to train and all. He ignored the requests and his work got worse if anything. Most other people in the work group resented him but for a couple of people who liked to egg him on and told him I could never fire him until I did.

He filed an human right complaint against me. I was a racist and only fired him because he was Asian. There was an investigation and they interviewed many people in the company. It is not a good feeling being investigated by a government department. Finally they sat me down with an "adjudicator" aka judge jury and executioner who read out the complaint and quoted several statements that were rather nasty about me. It confused him as there were many statements that contradicted those. But where there is smoke.....

I opened my file and presented my case. All the reasons for the termination were documented and objective. I gave him several opportunities to improve and documented the lack of progress over 9 months. My case was strong to fire him. As far as those nasty comments I told them there were a few people in the group that were hostile and may have encouraged the complaint for their own reasons.

I was found to have not fired him based on race and that ended the first round. It was not over. The complainant filled an appeal on the finding and his supporters got more active including vocal public comments that they were going to get me. That concerned my bosses (there were 3) who did not like controversy and liked the idea of one big happy family. I was not in the clear.

A new investigation started. This one was a large aggressive woman who liked kicking asses. I was sat down with her and we did it all again. At the end she asked why or perhaps I suggested that there was another reason they were pursuing the issue so hard. It was stupid for them to call me a racist as I replaced the person with someone of the exact same racial and ethnic background who did excellent work.

She was interested now. Why are they doing this if you hired the same type of person to replace him? It's simple really. The person I hired was a woman. I will take you down to meet her If you like. The obvious inference was they objected to her because they were sexist, but I did not out and say that.

The adjudicator literally slammed the binder shut, and said she wanted to meet this person. So I took her down and introduced her. She liked working for me and so did the two other women in the group. ( They were all the best CAD people I had ).

Now I was in the clear.

Within the next year I let go two more "hostile" under performers.

Guess which ones.

[professional1977]

Engineer in the Boardroom.

Sometimes it is best to keep quiet and say nothing.

I was working for a really interesting company. I had started with them years before and had some inventions and patents which they claimed ownership of. I was the creative engineering and R&D guy. I was also expert in government and industry regulations.

The company had been making a product line under license. It had become a big part of the business. The owner of that license was not responding to inquiries about renewal which was due in a few months. The purpose of the license was to have patent protection. We all believed that the patent was weak, but lawsuits are a bitch so it is best to be able to threaten people with "we have a patent."

So it was decided we would design a new line of products from scratch. The patent was weak, but a clause in the license let us do custom work and that was not expiring. I was familiar with regulations to do with Handicap Access and safety and things of that nature, so I put my hand up for that. I also said I would do some structural calculations so we could make sure they stood up on their own. The master design job was taken on by our "architectural group". I put quotes around that as they were technically landscape architects. They designed parks and drew very nice renderings of stuff. They usually worked with marketing to promote sales. They knew buildings and structures were useful but not how to build them.

Here was the ideal marketing and architectural cooperative combination. The sales guys took their best selling old system modules and asked for new sketches and plans and renderings. They had a lot of fun. I was occasionally brought in to comment on applicable regulations and a few tweaks. You can't do that, but try this sort of thing. It was going really well. My goal was to keep an eye on what was happening for when it all went bad. I knew it would, they missed a part.

I had spent years sticking my nose unasked in places to help when I saw a problem. I made some enemies. That is one reason I studied those regulations and later actually contributed to developing new ones. When I got actively involved many people took it negatively. Yes I invented this and that and we won awards, but.... For this I was holding back. Still involved but waiting for the train wreck.

This situation is not unusual. Basically people in charge not knowing what was required to get something done. We had a factory that was set up to build things from steel and fiberglass for kids to play on. It used a large set of hand drawn pieces that assembled into structures. Without drawings they can't build anything. One thing that license provided was a dozen binders full of sketches.

A deadline was set for when the new system would be complete and ready to start building. The shop manager and I both knew that a lot of drawings were needed to do that. We were the only ones I guess and we both kept quiet. If we had piped up we would have been seen as not team players. Everyone is happy no negatives, don't say no.

There was a big meeting in the boardroom I was there the shop manager was there, marketing was there, the architects were there with a lovely set of drawings and renderings of the "New" system. The partners in the firm were all there. There was also the chief draftsman and his sidekick who was still learning his new 3D cad system. I had been using a different one for several years to design molds and new products and parts. I also did computer renderings which was rather new back then. I did not get along with those two guys.

The new designs were passed around. There was the air of triumph in the room. This is great, that is wonderful. Marketing and the architects beamed with pride. I looked at the shop manager and he at me. The president who was also the majority stock holder was very pleased. This is great. Then he asked the shop manager how soon can you start making these? He said; "I can't make anything."

There was a sudden change in atmosphere.

He leaned back and said; "I can't build from these sketches. I need shop drawings with dimensions and details. I need parts lists. These are pretty pictures." The President then looked at the draftsmen. "OK how long will it take to get shop drawings for these units." The sidekick replied "I will have to look at it."

President said; "You are looking at it!"

This guy with the new 3D cad system had been copying the hand written sketches for the old system into CAD for a few months. He was pretty slow, but as his boss was his buddy there was no pressure. He looked at the smallest unit and relating it to his progress he said; "I can do one unit in 6 months."

"That's not good enough we need work in the shop now. The sales people are starting to sell this stuff. Go downstairs, put your heads together and come up with a better schedule." That concluded the meeting. I had said nothing the whole time. The train was fully off the rails.

The shop manager was called over to the partners. Is there anything you can do? "I need fabrication drawings. The smallest old unit had a dozen pages of parts. Here I have one pretty picture with only a few dimensions. No there is nothing I can do or anyone in my shop."

Talk about a bummer.

Previously I would have jumped in well before and taken the whole thing on myself. But I had learned that is not wise and actually hurts long term. I went back to my desk and got back to my usual work. Actually I had done a bit of CAD work on some parts to check the forces and loads. So I had a start on it.

Two days later one of the partners asked to see me. "Well that was a disaster" he said. "Apparently the improved shop drawing schedule is 4 months for the first unit and one unit per month after that."

I nodded;" Sounds about right for him."

"Can you do better?"

"Yes give me three people, and three more seats of my CAD system. I will train them to operate it and put out the first unit in 8 weeks."

"You have been thinking about this?"

"Of course. I've had a few days"

Cutting to the chase I did better. I set up the team trained them and had the first unit done in six weeks and the entire catalog in 4 months. In six months the first few units were installed and we had designed a custom giant unit with 50,000 pounds of steel in it. The new product line was a hit.

I would not have been given permission to do anything had I not waited to be asked. The people who would have been given the job had to fail to clear the way.

So the moral of the story is sometimes its best to shut the F up.

[professional1977]

Adventures with PhD engineers #3

This is the bad one.

I was working for a small company making prestressed concrete things in British Columbia. It was mostly bridge girders but occasionally building walls and roofs. We once did a funky thing for a bridge that was to be decorated to look like an old English stone arch. Some cool stuff.

We being small and lean were really competitive in the market. There was a huge job in Seattle for many hundreds of big girders to span over an interstate highway. Basically they were going to bury it so as to not bother the neighbors. We were the low bidder.

Nearby there was a big company that had built the girders for an elevated rapid transit system that was completed. They also bid on the Seattle project. Shock and amazement they were high bidder. Being part of a large well funded conglomerate they bought our company to get that project. Strangers showed up and started going through all the files. The manager said we were sold and things would change. Oh Shit.

Initially the idea was as I had done the cost breakdown on all the big girders and was familiar with it I would be employed to carry it on. The engineer they had on staff was a PhD but was also the branch manager I recall. Well it didn't happen that way. Construction especially big projects is a Dirty business. This was a big project with federal funding.

A small brand new company in Seattle also bid on the job. I kid you not they claimed their president was a part black, part first nations, woman. It was a shell created to cover for a big firm in Seattle that had also bid too high. As this new firm, which had no track record mind you, was minority owned they were permitted to lower the price to match our winning bid. Being "local" and "minority" this was allowed and looked good in the news. Yes it was a sham, but we were out.

Well that is being up shit creek, but we were offered a paddle of sorts. The big conglomerate shut down our facility and moved us to their office trailers in another town by their facility which was an otherwise open field covered in gravel. We would carry on and bring efficiencies to their operation. It was good for me as it was much closer to my home. I had hope.

Now I have to say that I now had years of experience in the industry. I had been a designer for some time and was a fully qualified and certified professional. There is a type of product called a double Tee. It is a thin broad top flange with two legs and looks like the Greek letter Pi. It is relatively light and efficient and capable of long clear spans. In parking garages it is very common as it is so efficient and very reliable. Over the years I had designed hundreds of these.

I was so familiar with them I could look at the loads and the span and just write down the design. What took me pages in earlier years was just one page of checking. My immediate boss who had also come over from the little company was familiar with them too.

One day he called me into his office and asked me to look at something. It was a design for a double Tee for a parking garage in Seattle. It was 8 feet wide, 27 inches deep and 60 feet long, very normal and standard. I looked at the prestressing strand pattern and WTF. Such a member would normally have 14 x 1/2 " strands with two point depression. That is 7 strands in each of the two legs. This design had much less. Maybe 6 or even 5 strands per leg I do not recall. My old boss told me it was going into production and he was worried.

The design had been done by the PhD. Old boss asked me to do a check calculation so I did. It did not conform to the US ACI code for prestress as it had much too much tension in the bottom under specified load. There is an alternate method where you can have more tension, but that still has to resist what are called factored loads. I calculated both ways and neither worked.

I took my figures to the PhD. Under standard Ethics you have to do that. I explained my calculations in detail. He offered no technical reply like he had used another method or anything of that nature. He said two things in reply; "We have to agree to disagree here. I think you are wrong. Also this is going into Washington State and a U.S. Professional Engineer has already sealed the drawings. It is his problem now."

He said I was wrong, but did not check my calculations for error. He did not offer to show me his calculations. He absolved himself of any responsibility as an American Engineer had sealed the drawings. I was also instructed to do nothing more on this it was not my business. Each of those things is a violation of ethics. 4 hits there.

A few weeks before writing this I completed a course on engineering practice which had several hours of ethics in it. The reason for that is engineers are often pressured to do things that are not right. The course existed because we know it has happened in the past. This story is over 30 years old. The standards have not really changed over the years. I could have done more, but what was not clear. Obviously I would have lost my job there. In short order I did. The reality of business is bosses are bosses and they have power.

I can say that even by the standards of the day that PhD failed ethically and technically. He should have checked his calculations. He should have informed the US engineer. He did neither. Had this been done today and found lacking, he would have been sanctioned. Likely a wrist slap, and I would still lose my job and likely been black balled in the industry. Maybe the competition would have hired me, but nothing is certain.

Engineering is numbers. Truth is determined by numbers. The only places for error are concept or bad math. Arguments are settled by numbers. Usually.

Current Practice demands that if I had not been satisfied I should have taken action and not stopped until I was satisfied. But there is one more thing. Soon after I started in the new company they sent me into the yard to supervise assembly of a large concrete form. The lead hand was an interesting person. He had a guaranteed job and was paid extra for special services. Those services were mostly to prevent union action against the firm. He was a teamster, and a Hell's Angel. He was short, stocky, strong as a bull and did beat people up. This was made very clear to me. Had I really pushed back I would have a Hell's Angel on my back.

I did lose that job and ended up working in Winnipeg.

[professional1977]

Adventures with PhDs #4

At least one story should be a happy one. This one was.

The whole story is rather long. I was working for a company that made water rides. We got an inquiry from a HUGE entertainment firm. They are still a money no object kind of organization for certain things. Sales received a request for a special ride system for a pair of cruise ships they were building. Part of this was a strange feature where water is used to push boats up small inclines. I was the expert on that so I was asked to look at that part and check what they had done.

The basic ride had been laid out with standard fiberglass tubes and they had a price figured out. The Client was less than happy with it. It was OooKaay. I had done projects with this company before. They lavish designers on the smallest details. I asked the salesman did they send artwork? Yes, but we can't build what they asked for. Show me the artwork. He did a bit reluctantly.

I cannot say exactly who the client was as I signed an NDA. They do not admit to having outsiders design their stuff.

They had prepared several renderings and even a set of story boards for their vision. It was really cool actually. Big crystal clear tubes wrapped around the top deck of the ship. Curved loops and long straight runs above happy people playing and stuff like that. Very Jetsons kind of look if you know what that is. If it were any other company wanting this it was impossible. But these guys will often spend whatever it takes to get what they want.

I told the salesman we can build exactly what they want. It will be very expensive but they wont mind. I know who can build those big clear tubes. I can do a full design for it and we can requote it. AND they will buy it.

There was a meeting in two weeks. Credit to the salesman and the owner that they told the customer that we were going to "try" to build exactly what they show in the pictures. and give them another price. I did a design for the whole layout in 3D CAD. I got sizes and quantities for the big tubes to be made from acrylic. We did computer renderings of the finished ride.

There are two companies in the world who can make acrylic that heavy to the size and quality required. I had done work with both. I got prices for the parts I needed. I took the most expensive option for costing it. The price quoted for the full blown concept was 10 times more expensive than the first one. They loved it. The PM (which that company calls the "producer") said if they could not get this exact thing it was not worth building the boats. ( Calling them boats was to piss off the ship people a bit)

So the adventure began. There was a lot to do. Key to this was the ships were to be built in Northern Germany. They had a full engineering team. (German Engineers!) They also had a consulting marine architect firm in Norway working on it. That was a bit scary. Lots of number crunchers. We had two guys. Me and one other to push numbers.

So I called another firm nearby that does very complex stuff and knew the ropes and had several PhDs on staff. I wanted someone not to actually do the work, but to look over our shoulders while we did it. They came back and said they couldn't, they did not do consulting and were very busy. But they knew a guy. This guy was a full professor at the local university and had several PhDs. Why you need more than one is a question, but hey he had them. I went to meet him and we hit it off. A fun good humored person and German to boot.

We showed him the plans and he was generous and helpful. He kept his eye on what I was doing, and what our structural engineer was doing. There were some things new to us like vibration in the structure from the engine exhaust pulses, and propeller speed. He was an expert on vibration. One of his PhDs involved aeroelasticity. My idea was to have him familiar with all our work just in case.

I went to a big meeting in Germany where I helped the ship designers to route access stairs and loading stations which was going inside one of the ship's stacks. There were also many mechanical items to sort with water flow and weight of the ride and the water in it that high in the ship. If affected stability. It was crazy and fun. I actually like hard things like that.

Unfortunately while all this was going on one of the managers was after me as I was not "on his team". No kidding he was an ass. So I was asked to leave the company just as the project was starting fabrication. Me delivering a big success would hurt his status. A real ass.

Then just in case happened.

A few months later there was a crisis. People flew in from California, Germany, and Norway. They found a problem with the ride supports. Everything was put on hold. I was not there, but I was told this later by my old boss told me what happened and it was great.

A phalanx of German engineers sat on one side of the table. The ride project team joined by our PhD was on the other. I am sorry they did not call me in to watch. The ship engineers laid out what they thought was the problem. The professor listened carefully and thoroughly shot down all their concerns. "I was brought in at the beginning. I saw everything they were doing. I checked much of it. They have done a brilliant job and thorough. I see issues with your work. Oh and I have several PhDs from Germany how many advanced degrees do you have?"

The client went from very concerned to ecstatic. It was the ship's teams problem for not taking certain things into account. They had to go home and fix their work.

That is one of my many regrets about that project not being in that room. My biggest was I did not get a ride on the new ship when it was finished.

[professional1977]

OH Shit Moment.

Sometimes crisis appear suddenly. Other times they sneak up on you like a deadly disease. I think the second type is worse as it gives you time to think and worry and get all twisted up. I have had a few.

One thing about me is I take on things that have never been done before. I invent stuff to solve problems. There is risk in that, but I love the challenge too much to say no. If the numbers support me I keep going.

Several years ago I did a design for a strange cover system to go on top of a large water treatment facility. This involved a fabricated truss made from composite materials so as to be corrosion proof. I had gobs of numbers and gigabytes of FEA studies. There was one particular detail that was key to it working. This was how the very end which sat on a concrete edge was shaped to carry the weight. The problem was nobody could see it once it was made.

The parts were to be built in China. Our company owned the factory so generally we have great control over what is built. The owner of our company was from Hong Kong originally but his family was from China proper in the nearby region. He traveled back and forth between our office in North America and the factory. He was very clever and a true entrepreneur. But not clever enough.

The detail I mentioned was tricky to build. And once the part was closed in you would never see it. Tricky means expensive. I had a meeting with our owner before he left for the factory and discussed this detail and told him how important it was. He made no objections.

The parts were fabricated and shipped to the site in California. Installation went well with only a few minor questions about fit and order of assembly. All was well.

After almost a year the contractor got in touch about these cracks that were appearing in the ends. At first I was not concerned as there were only a few places, and I knew that inside this box shape was this detail that was actually carrying the load. We hired a local shop to go and patch the cracks. Everything was fine for a while longer.

More cracks appeared. This time I got a photo that was able to see inside the box and it was empty. The internal frame part was missing. I contacted the factory. Are there any photos of the fabrication? No we have no pictures. They always have pictures. Actually I should have suspected something as the factory did weekly reports that always had photos, except this project. I was busy with other things so did not ask back then.

As best as I can figure our owner wanted to save money on the job so told the factory to not follow the drawings. It would be fine. Nobody can see. He is the boss. Oh and don't tell the engineer. After pushing very hard I got them to admit that all the parts had been made that way. They did have photos.

At this point there is little choice as to what to do. But it is scary as this kind of issue can cripple a company. If all these parts did not have this internal feature it would not survive the loads it was intended to. If we fixed it by replacing all these parts our company might not survive. The units on site did not fail, these were only cracks so far. There were other secondary load paths and my FEA on the "missing" configuration showed that the safety factors were far less, and not right, but no so dangerous people could not work on the cover area in the interim.

I agonized over this. It was a weekend with little sleep as I really had no choice. I knew what was wrong. What happened was not my fault, but I was responsible now. This is an OH Shit moment. Wonder I do not have an ulcer.

I informed the contractor who informed the owner. I informed our management. Our old boss had passed away so he could not offer resistance. The contractor sent me a nice letter appreciating my candor and honesty. I know some professions where you hide behind a phalanx of lawyers and let the courts deal with it years later. I am not that kind of person.

Eventually our company took it on to fix the pieces. New sections of the ends were fabricated in China with photos showing all the details. I redesigned the ends to let me see inside the critical area. We shipped the new ends to our shop and had all the defective units shipped there too. We cut off all the bad ends and spliced on all the new ones. We shipped them back.

I am sure it cost far more than the original job to do the fix. I was proud and a bit surprised we did not go bankrupt.

You have to do what you have to do.

[professional1977]

Last slide rule generation.

For centuries people used a thing called a slide rule to do calculations. It is a clever device and remarkably accurate if you are careful.

I bring this up as I started engineering school using a slide rule, but finished with an electronic calculator. The year I graduated High School HP came out with the first practical pocket calculator. It cost $395 USD which is about 3kilobucks in today's money.

In my freshman year at Uni everyone had slide rules. The engineering nerds had sword like scabbards on their belts to hold them. Sophomore year about 1/3 had HP 35s. Junior year 75% had HP or Texas Instrument calculators. By senior year the slide rules were gone.

Mine was the last generation to use slide rules seriously. They were convenient very portable, and did not need batteries. If you learned how to use them it was interesting and changed the way you think about mathematical solutions. You also had to use your head to keep track of the decimals and numeric magnitudes as a slide rule only gives you a few significant digits.

All the engineering up to and including the moon shots were done with slide rules. There were computers, but those were few in number, hard to get to use and hard to use when you could get access. My university had a very big computer system because they did a lot of work for the US defense department. This was decades before everyone had one on their desk or in their pocket.

[professional1977]

Death

I once had to testify at a coroner's inquest. There had been an accident in a swimming pool and a young female lifeguard had drowned. My company had provided some equipment in the form of a waterslide and the suction pipe for it trapped the person who died.

When something like this happens it hurts. I have two daughters and could not help but feel horrible about this. This was a case where several people could have done more, if they only knew more. My part was to provide a copy of a drawing to the architect of a grating that had been used before in other places with no apparent problems. That grating was one of the problems. My boss gave me the drawing and he may or may not have been its original author.

The grating was an array of plastic pipes running vertically between horizontal pipes bolted to the floor and the underside of an opening for a wave generator. The horizontal pipes were cut in half and had holes drilled in them that held the verticals loosely so they could turn. The idea being if a swimmer got an arm or leg between them they could easily pull them out. It was all plastic though.

It was all built and commissioned and job done.

The waterslide had a supply pump that drew water from within the wave chamber and behind this grating. The intake was a single pipe into this "guarded" area.

The grating broke for some reason and the lifeguard went in the pool to clear out the parts. The pump was running and she got trapped.

I was called to testify on behalf of our company as the supplier of the waterslide. I sat in the hearing room and listened to details from the medical examiner, the first responders, the architects, and pool staff. I could see the parents across the room. You cannot but respond emotionally to this. Part of this is to think; "could I have prevented it?" My job had been to design the supports for the waterslide in the building and seal the drawings for that. The pumps had been provided by the pool builder.

There was a jury and in inquests the jury may ask questions directly to the witnesses. There were lawyers for the insurers, the municipality, the architect and the family. Frankly I do not recall if I was the last witness or not, I think I may have been. I do recall a comment from one juror about wanting to hear from the waterslide company as "they seem to be responsible." It was hard to get up when my name was called. I almost surprised myself that I did not panic and stayed quite calm during the whole thing.

I told them my role in the design. I had not designed the pipes or pumps as that was done by other people. The standard industry practice at the time was for a single intake if it was a restricted and protected area which this was. My company made wave pool equipment, and did provide the drawing of the grating, but did not build it. I had been told that similar gratings were used in many places and found it in several other pools in the province when I dug into the background. It was a standard.

An inquest is not a trial. It feels like one, but the rules are bit less rigorous. I could talk about what I learned about the grating without being responsible for it. In a liability trial I would have been burned at the stake. I think I was on the stand for a long time. I do not recall many details, but I kept calm and respectful and open and honest. I said I don't know when I didn't know. I did not speculate. I do recall offering condolences to the family and mentioned I had two daughters of my own.

Then it was over.

I guess I left a positive impression. I remember many people smiling afterwords and shaking my hand. The architect was particularly glad as he had been raked over the coals hard.

There are four agencies that are responsible for safety in our area. Two overlap in pool construction. One is the health department and the other is workplace safety. The coroner recommendations included making new standards and rules and a new design for such gratings. I sat down with the safety engineers and we came up with a new grating design in stainless steel. That was retrofitted to all the pools we could find even those that had not used our equipment.

I changed the company standard to require two intakes for every suction line regardless of being accessible or not. I also joined a standards making organization (ASTM) and made it a rule industry wide. There were a few other things too with procedures and operational training. I certainly looked at things differently after that.

Being responsible sometimes goes beyond what you are working on. This persons death had repercussions across an industry. I will never forget it.

[professional1977]

Take your dad to school day

If your kid has an interesting dad or one who does an interesting thing you may find yourself in their class one day to do a presentation. I have two daughters. When they were in school I worked for a company that built waterslides and amusement rides. I was a senior engineer and had inventions and patents and all sorts of stuff. So my child asked me if I would come to her class one day and do a talk. I said yes.

She is a tricky girl and told nobody what I did only that I was an engineer. When I walked in there sat all the kids not interested at all. I guess they expected math and stuff. So I introduced myself and told them I worked for a local company and I was an engineer and the usual blah blah. You could see them actively lose interest.

Then I said I designed waterslides and the mood changed instantly. Their eyes perked up and every kid in the class, except mine, was paying full attention. My girl was observing her classmates. I passed out brochures with gobs of pretty pictures of sunny days and happy kids and all that stuff. Lots of brightly colored fiberglass in hot sunny places.

I told them a few things and yes I use math and I learned a lot of science, but what I did was fun. I spoke for about 5 minutes but then was asked questions for 20 more. Where have you gone? What is the most crazy thing you built? Is it hard to do this? Where can I ride one of these? Fortunately there are a few slide parks nearby and all had some of our products.

Oh and yes if science and math interest you being an engineer is not hard to become. It is a job that society needs. I had done bridges and bits of buildings, and imagine not having any of those. But fun is important too.