Provide Milk

| 20f | | https://archiveofourown.org/users/JejeButter | My AO3 Interests: Mortal Kombat/ Gravity Falls

[alextuckrrr]

[barkedup-deactivated20251021]

i said i was going to draw race car bed betty and you know i don't break promises

[owl-wolf]

my icon that i drew in late april!! i think i hesitated to post this bc it’s just another bust shot and my posts have been kind of repetitive, but i don’t think i’ll be able to make anything new for a while so ;; today i offer you Him

[provide-milk]

#gah damn

[provide-milk]

Hey guys! Sorry for being inactive. Midterms have been killing me. I haven’t forgotten about “Do You Know What Your Doing To Me?” and I also have some new ideas for other fics! Stay tuned!

[chillinglyadventurous-deactivat]

A Real Treat

“Leave the bowl on the porch,” he said between kisses placed on your shoulder.

Word count: 1,387

Tags: NSFW, MDNI

“Which one of you is going out with the twins?” You called into the living room from the kitchen, dumping candy into the large plastic bowl on the counter. You pulled out a Twix, unwrapping it before popping it into your mouth. “I don’t want what happened on Summerween to repeat itself.”

You could hear Dipper and Mabel shuffling around in the attic, fighting over whether they should be ketchup and mustard or salt and pepper. You laughed when you heard Mabel yell, “Why do we always have to be food?!”

You were kind of glad you weren’t going with them. You’d be up and down all night giving out candy, but the ruby red slippers you were wearing were not conducive to the weather despite hitting mid-calf, so you carried your bowl into the living room to find Ford. He stood by the fish tank and just the sight of him made you laugh. His hair was a mess and the white lab coat he was wearing was splotched in fake blood. Well, you hoped it was fake. He was really leaning into the whole mad scientist thing.

Ford smiled when you came into the room, placing your bowl on the t-Rex skull. “You look beautiful.”

“It was the only women’s costume that didn’t make me look like a slut,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “Why is it that women’s costumes have to be slutty? It's freezing too! Who wants to be wearing basically nothing and freeze all night?”

He kissed your forehead, hand falling to your hip. “I could keep you warm.” His voice in your ear caused a shiver to roll down your spine. That wicked grin faded when Stan and the kids came down the stairs. “Ah, Stanley, what are you supposed to be?”

You clocked the striped suit. Stan’s face was painted white, eyes blacked out. You stepped back from Ford’s hold. “Beetlejuice.”

“Who?” Ford laughed. “Who is Beetlejuice?”

Mabel’s jaw dropped, “If one of you says that again, I’m going to lose it.”

“Beetlejuice!” Dipper shouted.

Stan gave an annoyed huff. “Okay, losers, stop that.” He ruffled ketchup’s and mustard’s hair, “You condiments ready to hit the road? I’ve scoped out the best neighborhood. If we get there early, we have a seventy-five percent greater chance of snaggin’ some full-size candy bars. I’m not playing around with that fun-sized crap this year.”

“Have fun,” you laughed, “and, Stan, please don’t let them eat all of their candy tonight. You’re not the one who has to take care of sick kids in the morning.”

Stan waved you off. “Yeah, yeah, you young people and this health craze. Whatever. What happened to stuffing your face with sugar and no consequences, huh?”

“I’m 30.”

“Yeah,” Stan sputtered, “young.”

“Bye, [Y/N]!” Dipper and Mabel called as the sprinted out the door.

Stan waved over his shoulder. “Have fun handin’ out candy, nerds.”

When the door slammed shut you gave a sigh of relief, thankful that you wouldn’t have to deal with the chaos this time. Summerween had been a nightmare.

You laughed, arms winding around Ford’s neck again. “Why is it that your brother can do math when it comes to money and candy, but nothing else?

He shrugged in response. Your words quickly forgotten. “So,” Ford leaned into your hold, “who is Beetlejuice?”

“It’s a movie,” you said simply. “We can watch it when they get back. It came out in 1988, so you just missed it.”

For the most part, you and Ford took turns handing out candy to the kids who dared to traverse the spooky and dangerous, if you were being honest, maze Stan had set up in the front yard. When you weren’t handing out candy, however, you were draped over your boyfriend who’s six fingers kept trying to sneak their way up the hem of your dress as a slasher film played on screen. His plans were thwarted with each knock on the door.

“You’re turn,” he huffed. He helped you stand, hand grazing up the back of your thigh as you stood.

You could feel his eyes peeling away at your clothes as you walked to the door. It made you blush. You tried to forget the way his teasing hands felt on your legs, the way he did his best to seem sly enough for you not to notice.

You opened the door to see four children dressed as a witch, a fairy, a ghost, and a vampire. “Wow,” you gushed, “you guys look great!”

“Trick or treat!”

You gave them each a large handful of candy. You smiled, hoping your two trick-or-treaters were having just as much fun as the kids sprinted away from the door and into the darkness. Still, you just hoped some candy monster wasn’t stalking Dipper and Mabel. That was a mess.

Two hands taking hold of your waist pulled you out of thought. “Leave the bowl on the porch,” he said between kisses placed on your shoulder. His arms snaked around you as Ford rested his chin on your shoulder. “ His fingers fiddled with the braids in your hair.

“It’s almost 9:00,” you sighed as you pressed back into him. “The kids will be home soon.”

“All the more reason to leave the bowl on the porch.”

He looked so mischievous when you turned around in his arms. Before you could speak, he lifted you off your feet, the door slamming shut. Your legs were tightened around his waist. His face was pressed firmly to your neck, kisses dropped haphazardly as he carried you through the Shack. You thanked the Ford who built this house all those years ago for not putting his bedroom too far from the front door when he dropped you onto the mattress.

“Based on Stan’s plans for the evening,” his voice was gruff as he pushed up the hem on your dress, “we have approximately twenty minutes.”

He didn’t bother to undress himself, sliding your panties down your legs. No time to respond, he hitched your right leg over his shoulder, pinning your left knee to the mattress. “You look good enough to eat,” he chuckled, sliding down your body. “A real treat.”

He disappeared beneath your dress, his tongue on you. You gave a shaking moan. His tongue swirling and dipping inside of you. You sighed his name as you felt two of his digits slip inside of you, hitting that spot with a simple curl. Just as you were teetering on the edge, your name spilling out of your mouth like a prayer, he pulled away. Wet kisses were worked up your whole body.

With a rushed brush of his lips against yours, you felt him push inside of you. Twin gasps escaped the two of you and you loved that sound. Everytime you found yourself with him between your legs, that sound was always your favorite.

He stayed still for a long while, enjoying the feeling of your warmth around his length, the way your walls fluttered around him, how wet you were for him without much effort. “You’re stunning,” he punctuated his words with a deep kiss to your lips.

As his hips rocked into you, you held tight to him. You didn’t care about the sticky fake blood across his lab coat that had begun to coat your thighs. You’d be covered in it by the time this was over, but you couldn’t care less.

“We have to make this quick.” You were already there. Painfully, you waited for that single thrust that would finally make you cum. “Please, Stanford.”

It was hard, upward thrust right into your G-spot and you came undone. He ignored your moans, you begs for him to never stop. He fucked you through it until you were pliable and limp against the sheets. That was when his rhythm falters, a sharp ‘fuck’ falling from his mouth against your cheek.

Neither of you had a chance to catch your breath before you heard Stan grumbling outside. “Why’s the candy bowl outside?” Both you and Ford jumped up. He followed you into the living room, zipping his pants as he went.

“Hey,” you grinned, feigning innocence, “get a good haul?” Ford’s hand found the small of your back, unable to resist touching you.

[dolls-self-ships]

this is kinda lame but I wanted to do something for Halloween!

some bonus doodles under the cut 💜

[heph]

Yall ever think about how Ford had to relearn how to be a normal human being after 30 years of isolation

[dolls-self-ships]

What do you think Ford’s reaction is to new music? I just imagine one day playing one of your playlists for him and him just being really confused. Him being all like, “this is what people listen to now?”

to be honest I think he would be open to trying new music but overall prefers what he grew up with. I think as a scientist being open minded comes very naturally to him, because to do that kind of work you have to be open to explore new ideas and discover new things, so I absolutely think he would give modern music a try! He would be very shocked by the kind of language being used in music these days though. Poor guy would get very flustered if you showed him any lyrics by cupcake, hell I feel like even Ariana grande might make him blush. Will listen to it if you really want him to but will sit there awkwardly and refuse to sing along with you, sorry

[provide-milk]

Ford Pines NSFW Alphabet

!Minors do not interact with!

Inspired by @roolette and their Johnny Cage NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Didn’t know anything about aftercare at first. He seemed to be deep in thought after everytime you guys first had sex (he would still be in the middle of processing everything that happened). It annoyed you how silent he was after finishing.

“How was it?” You would ask as you scooched closer to him on the bed.

“Good.” He would mumble, staring at the ceiling (that post nut clarity getting to him).

But now He enjoys every second of you, giving you kisses all over your body and always making sure he has a towel. He spoons you from behind, giving you pecks on your neck. “That was great dear. I didn’t know you were so flexible.” He’d say in a teasing manner. “Oh shut up Ford.” You’d smile. He loved those tender moments after sex, whispering about different things and holding onto one another.

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partners)

Used to hate his fingers. Emphasis on the ‘used to,’ That is before he watched the way you kiss each of his fingers and sensually put them in your mouth, while making eye contact with you. He loves how much you love them, especially how you compliment how good they feel inside you and how he’s able to find just the right spots to have you screaming his name (come on, have you seen the way that man handles a dice). As for you, he loves every part of you, but especially your thighs. When you guys are sitting down together at a restaurant, he’ll squeeze your thigh under the table, causing you to accidentally kick the person in front of you. He swears he could die a happy death between your thighs (we’ll get back to this at letter O..).

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum, basically)

He was terrified of the idea of accidentally cumming inside you, always making sure to wear a condom. But one day he finally gave into your pleas. “Ford, please. I’m on the pill. It’ll be fine.” He sighed, “I suppose we can try it one time.” After that he was addicted to it. Always begging to cum inside you and making sure to fuck every last bit of it inside you. Sometimes he’d pull out and watch it drip out of you, forcing it back inside with his fingers. It felt like he was claiming you as his own which he loved the feeling of. That you were his and his only.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Secretly loves the age gap (much to his chagrin). Something about a pretty, young thing like you being head over heels for him only added to his ego. He’d ask you, “Why don’t you date guys your own age?” “Because they can’t do the things you do to me.” He loved hearing your answers. Once his discomfort about the age difference goes away, he’s bragging about you constantly. You feel like a prize to him that he needs to show off. During a rough session, the words, “You perverted old man. You like fucking me, knowing that I’m half your age.” You could feel Ford’s dick twitch inside you. “Did you actually like it when I said that?” You’d ask after. “Let’s talk about something else…” He’d respond, avoiding eye-contact with you.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Not experienced, basically a virgin which shocked you to no end . But man, does he learn fast. He observes exactly what gets you going and writes it down in a journal (for research only of course..). Starts off shy at first, constantly looking for reassurance that he’s doing a good job, but once he’s got it down he quickly becomes more confident and a little bit cocky too. The fact he can make you squirt now is still a high he hasn’t come down from. You start to wonder where that innocent man went when he’s hitting all the right spots, making you scream out his name.

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying)

He absolutely loves cowgirl. His back sometimes hurts after hours of pouring over his journals. Being able to lay back and watch your erotic expressions while you take the lead turns him on to no end. He’d hold onto your waist, his fingers almost leaving six bruises on your torso, thrusting into you once you started losing momentum, loving the way you threw your head back and let out a loud moan. Once while cleaning, you found a detailed drawing in his notebook of you naked, riding him, your face twisted in pleasure. You flipped the pages to see nothing but similar content, but in other positions with little notes on what he noticed turned you on the most during your session.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

Not a big fan of jokes in bed, thinks you’re laughing at him if you start to giggle at a joke that comes to your mind. One way to get him to be rougher with you is to tell him a joke while you guys are going at it. Will immediately manhandle you and start fucking you into oblivion until you completely forget what you even said. Will make sure to keep a serious face even if he does find it funny. He finds that it ruins the mood. “Don’t say stuff like that while we’re doing this.” He’d grumble. “Or else what?” With a response like that you were definitely willing to not be able to walk right for the next few days.

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He doesn’t shave unless you ask him to, which he doesn’t very often because he knows you love his happy trail. He argues shaving takes too much time away from his research. Doesn’t mind if you don’t shave either, he couldn’t care less. During the beginning of your relationship, if he wanted to have sex and you didn’t shave you would feel slightly uncomfortable about it, telling him awkwardly. Once you got the reply, “You think that’s gonna stop me?”, the embarrassment quickly went away.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect.)

Things can get rough with Ford, but he still makes sure to treat you like a goddess. Giving you kisses all over your body and praising you the whole time. “Despite all the dimensions I’ve been in, you by far are the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen.” Somedays, he just wants to be as slow and tender with you as possible, fully enjoying just how much of a safespace you’ve become to him. During times like those he loves missionary so he can be as close to you as possible and indulge in every one of your lustful expressions.

J = Jack off (Masturbation Headcanon)

Prefers not to and would rather just have you get him off instead. But sometimes, as he’s looking through the erotic art that he’s drawn of you, while he’s alone in the lab, he can’t help it. He definitely wouldn’t tell you unless you asked and he would get very embarrassed by his answer.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

He has definitely asked you if you could cosplay as one of his favorite science fiction, fantasy, or Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons characters. For his birthday you decided to surprise him, dressed as an elven princess with the gown and all. His jaw basically dropped the moment he saw you waiting for him in your guys’ shared bed. It was like his college wet dreams came true in that moment and he was on you in almost seconds.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

His desk has become one of the most common place that Ford fucks you.It feels all so spontaneous and somewhat rebellious each time. You’ll be sitting on his lap in his chair and suddenly you’re getting manhandled onto the desk, with him shoving everything to the side to make space for you. If he’s feeling particularly rough, he’ll bend you over the desk. Only negative is that now Ford has difficulty focusing at times at his desk because that’s all his mind is thinking of. But Ford does love how intimate it gets when you both are in your shared bed. It would have to be a tie for him.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Anything you do. Could be something entirely random and immediately he’s turned on and ready to go. Come on, here’s a man who hasn’t been touched hardly at all his whole life. Once you come into his life and become physical with him there’s no going back. A slight brush of the hands and he’s grabbing it, whispering in your ear all the dirty things he wants to do to you. Sometimes you’ll be doing something like liking the cream off your lips from a cake or bending over to grab something and Ford is making his way over to whisper something absolutely obscene in your ear, causing you both to start getting handsy with one another immediately.

N = No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Not a fan of extreme bdsm. You’ve asked him to slap you before but you decided that it would only be something you can dream about when you saw how uncomfortable he looked at the thought. Sure, he’s down for light bdsm, like tying you up, maybe calling you a few names (depends on how he’s feeling), spanking, and being a bit rougher than usual. But things such as knife play are a big no to him, even though he does like the taste of blood… He would just be too worried that he was going to hurt you in a negative way or go too far.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

It is very rare for Ford to turn down a blowjob. He especially loves to cumming all over your face and tries to memorize the sight to draw later. But man, could he spend hours between your thighs. This man eats you out like he’s starving. He loves to hear the sounds you make which rile him up even more so. It took him a little bit to get the gist of it, but after some practice (which you were more than happy to teach him how) he became a pro at it. When you pull at his hair and squeeze your thighs tight around his face he swears he could cum right there and sometimes he has.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Usually it starts off slow and sensual. With soft kisses and loving compliments. But somehow it tends to get rough halfway through. Whether it be a slight comment you make or his possessive side kicking in, he can get lost in the moment and the next thing you know you feel like you just ran a full marathon. But you love it, watching his primal instincts kick in and his uptight self disappearing.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

You've had many quickies in his lab before to the point it has become a weekly occurrence or even more sometimes. He definitely enjoys them and it’s a great way for him to let off steam when he’s been at his work for hours straight.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

As someone who has spent decades traveling between multiple dimensions, of course he’s down to do some risky things. At first he was pretty nervous. “Are you sure this is a good idea, love?” He’d ask, looking around nervously. But once his confidence in sex grew, so did his confidence in experimenting. It was even his idea to have sex in the Stanmobile once when Stan gave him the keys to get some groceries (of course this is a secret the two of you planned on dying with).

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

In the beginning, he did not last very long. Sometimes cumming just by pleasuring you without even getting touched. But this grew with time and for someone at his age, you were surprised by how much of a sex drive this man has. You guys have been able to go at it for a couple of hours before. You both are usually willing to go a few rounds if you’re doing it in bed.

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

You decided to bring toys into the bedroom one day and Ford was not much of a fan. At a certain point he just threw the toy to the side. “Ford! What are you doing? I paid good money for that?” “I’d rather be the one touching you.” He grumbled. It hurts his self esteem to watch you get pleasured by something that isn’t directly him. But he didn’t mind the handcuffs you bought. Whether that be you or him being handcuffed it doesn’t matter to him (which you think has something to do with Bill changing him up).

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

Can be a tease. Sometimes you’ll just be minding your own business and Ford will come up to you and whisper something dirty in your ear and tell you all the things he plans on doing to you. But then he’ll get so occupied in his work that he’ll forget what he even said. “So Ford… About what you said in the kitchen..” You said seductively. “What did I say?” He’d asked confused, his eyes not leaving his journal as he writes. “Nevermind..” “Dear?” “I said nevermind..” He’d just look at you confused before going back to his writing.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Definitely vocal, lots of moaning and grunting from him, as well as dirty talk. He tries to keep it down, but when you’re riding him or sucking him off it’s nearly impossible for him not to make noises, even if he’s biting his lip to stop himself. He even moans while eating you out which only adds to the pleasure. He whines every now and then and looks mortified each time. You make sure to tease him after which he responds by pretending not to know what you’re talking about. You both can be pretty loud which is why you’re thankful that most of the sex you have is away in his lab.

W = Wild Card (A random headcanon for the character)

You were surprised by just how possessive he is. He loves to mark you with hidden bite marks and hickeys, loving when they peak out every now and then. If anyone flirts with you or stares at you in public, he will pull you by the waist closer to you, a frown on his face and that’s when you know you’re gonna be up for a long night. You bought a necklace with his name on it and he gets hard just thinking about you wearing it.

X = X-ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

When it comes to length, he’s average size. But he makes up for it in girth and the slight angle to it which hits just the right spots. You didn’t know if you could fit him all in your mouth when you first saw it. As for the color, the tip is the same color as his nose.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

As I’ve said before, anything you do can turn him on, meaning that he’s down to have sex most of the time. This of course was unexpected to you and the seemingly innocent facade he had at the beginning has been completely shed and now he’s pretty vocal when he wants to fuck, which is pretty frequently. You swear that the first time you guys kissed is when you opened the floodgates and there was no going back after that. Of course, if you are not in the mood he will respect that.

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterward)

Takes him a bit to fall asleep because he struggles with insomnia. Waits for you to fall asleep first before he can fully relax. He’ll play with your hair as you drift off and kiss the top of your head. Has a habit of holding onto you tight to the point that sometimes you can hardly move, this due to his fear of something happening to you that he feels the need to protect you even in his sleep. Ford’s a pretty light sleeper, so if you do move he will feel it and wake up pretty quickly.

[provide-milk]

I need help

[provide-milk]

Pt 3: Do You Know What You're Doing To Me?: Ford x Reader

⚠️Minors do not interact with! NSFW!⚠️

Read Chapter 2 here! https://www.tumblr.com/provide-milk/764282571298390016/pt-2-do-you-know-what-youre-doing-to-me-ford?source=share

Everytime Ford entered the room and saw you, you received that soft smile that you adored and made you melt every time. 

“Good morning Ford!” 

“Good morning to you too, dear.”

You would have to hold back a grin whenever he called you that. Everyone else seemed to enjoy the tension disappearing and just assumed that you both figured things out in the car (which was true but you’d never tell them all the details). Except Wendy assumed that there was a little bit more to that innocent car ride.

“So… are you guys a thing now or something?” Wendy asked casually, as she swept the floor after noticing you and Ford continuously glancing at one another.

You looked at her confused, as you finally stopped gazing dreamily at Ford.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

Wendy groaned, “Come on! It’s so obvious I’m surprised no one else has noticed.”

“You must just be imagining things because there’s nothing going on between us.” You responded as casually as you possibly could in that moment. 

“Fuck, she figured it out.” You thought to yourself. 

“Hey, I’m not judging you guys. I mean he's pretty old, sure… But once you get over that I guess it kind of makes sense. Well maybe not… I guess what I’m trying to say is that if you guys are happy that’s all that really matters.”

As much as you wanted to indulge in some girl talk and spill the beans about kissing Ford, you remembered how you promised him that you wouldn’t tell anyone.

You took a deep breath, “I appreciate all of that Wendy, but there’s nothing going on between us. We’re just friendly with each other.”

“Whatever ‘friendly’ means, you guys definitely like each other and that’s for sure.”

You scoffed, “I don’t like him like that and I doubt that for him too.”

“Kid!” 

You turned your head to see Stan heading over towards you.

“I don’t know what happened between you guys and I don’t really care to know, but I’m glad to see old sixer back to himself. Seemed like that car ride really did help.”

You chuckled nervously, “Yeah, you can say that again..”

You could see out of the corner of your eye Wendy looking at you suspiciously.

“Seriously though, what did you do? He’s really stubborn. It’d take a lot more than just a car ride for us to make up. I have to keep in mind what you did next time he starts acting all high and mighty.”

You tried to avoid snickering at that last part.

“I don’t know Stan, I guess I just have a way with him.”

“That’s more than I can say..”

It was nice to see Ford back to his old self again, but it was a little different this time. Better this time. Whenever you guys were alone, you two couldn’t help but tease one another. Ford would be in the middle of telling you about some new discovery he made before giving you a compliment. He’d lean in closely towards you, causing you to lose your breath.

“Do you know how bad I want to kiss you right now?” He whispered.

You grinned, “So why don’t you?”

Ford hesitated, “Now’s probably not a good time..”

“Nobody is here, right now.” You said mischievously, slightly tugging on the strap around his torso.

“Still.. We should probably be a bit careful.”

“You’re the one who said you wanted to kiss me.”

“I did say that but-”

“Fine, I’ll do it.” You pulled him closer and gave him a quick peck on the mouth, then another, then anoth-

You were interrupted by some talking outside from tourists. You both quickly backed away from each other, Ford clearly flustered. 

He cleared his throat, adjusting the strap around his torso, “We both better go back to work. But before that… What time are you off again?”

“I get off at 5. Why?”

“I just want to see you.”

“Is that all?” You smirked.

Ford rubbed the back of his neck, “Maybe a little bit more than that.”

God, you couldn’t wait to get off. 

Sighs and moans filled the lab, as you sat on Ford’s lap kissing him back fervently. You were becoming addicted to just the taste of him and how his lips perfectly meshed with yours. As you moaned into his mouth, Ford took this as an opportunity to shove his tongue in causing yet another delicious sound to come from you. You tried to keep up with him, but it was almost difficult at times because he kissed you like he had been starving for you.

Your fingers entangled in his hair while his hands grabbed at your waist like he was trying to force you to be closer to him than you already were. You grinded against his already hardening erection, receiving a groan from him that you cherished each time. 

This was beginning to become the norm for the two of you. Almost everyday after work or sometimes even on breaks, Ford would call you down to the lab to help him with an ‘experiment.’ Each time he kissed you it felt like the first time and each session felt almost better than the last (which might be because of Ford’s kissing skills growing at a fast rate). You felt like two horny teenagers, hiding away from your parents. But as good as it felt, you wanted more. You pulled back from the kiss. As you caught your breath Ford looked at you quizzically. 

“Did I-” His chest heaved up and down, breathing heavily. “-do something wrong?”

“No.. Nothing wrong…”

He raised an eyebrow at you before trying to go back to kissing you, but pushed yourself farther back. 

“Everything ok?” He asked, confused. 

“Yeah… It’s just that.. I want more.”

Ford paused, “Oh. What do you mean by… more?”

“I mean like sucking your dick.” You said bluntly.

Ford’s eyes went wide, “I see…”

“Do you not want to?”

“That’s not the case…”

“Then can I?” 

Ford hesitated, “It’s just that once we go that far we can’t go back. Kissing is one thing but this is…”

“Ford… I can feel your dick poking me right now. I don’t think it’s too crazy of an idea at this point.” You rubbed yourself against him, causing him to grunt.

He seemed to be deep in thought, you hated it, you wish he just went for what he wanted instead of thinking so logically about everything

“No.” Ford finally responded, sternly.

“Ugh! You’re no fun…”

Ford just chuckled at your reaction. Fine, he wanted to be cruel, so were you then.

“But Ford…” You purred, grabbing one of his hands. “But if we keep kissing like this… I don’t know how I’m going to be able to control myself…”

Ford was silent, watching how you brought his hand up to your mouth, kissing each of the tips of his fingers. He froze. You gave soft licks to the top of his sixth finger, before placing it in your mouth and sucking. You could feel his erection hardening underneath you, poking you between your clothed folds. His eyes were filled with lust, as he couldn’t tear his eyes away from you. You moaned against his fingers, making eye contact with him and that was the last straw. He swore he could’ve came right there on the spot. He pulled his hand away from you.

“Do it.”

You grinned before getting off his lap. You tied your hair up with a hairband, eyeing him as  you dropped to your knees in front of him. Ford’s hand went towards his zipper and you swatted it away. His brows furrowed in confusion.

“Let me.”

You parted his legs open to make some room for yourself between them and started to unbuckle his belt. Once you were done with that, you lowered your head to his crotch, teasing the zipper between your teeth as you made eye contact with him before pulling it down with your mouth. You could see Ford’s bulge grow just by the sight of you, as he gripped the armrests of his chair. It felt like your heart was about to jump out of your chest in anticipation for what was next. You wanted this. Badly. Your fingers went under the waistband of his underwear.

“Are you sure you want this?” 

“Yes… I… I want it.” Ford responded breathily, shutting his eyes as you revealed his hardened cock.

Heat pooled between your legs just at the sight. You were surprised by the size of him, you knew he’d be on the bigger side but being face to face with his dick was another story. It wasn’t so much his length that was surprising, but the girth of him that had your mouth watering as you watched the precum fall from his tip. Ford was beginning to shuffle in his seat which took you out of your daze. You pressed your lips against the tip before swirling your tongue against the opening, finally tasting him which you thought you’d only be able to dream about. When you licked the underside of his cock, you heard a soft whine come from Ford. You immediately looked up at him to see his face reddening.

Ford cleared his throat, his eyes not meeting yours, “Just ignore that.”

“Why? I want to hear all the sounds you make. It’s cute.” You responded before finally taking the full head of his cock in your mouth. 

His leg twitched, as he took a deep sigh, trying to contain himself. His cock became fully erect in your mouth and you took this as an opportunity to begin to bob your head, tracing the veins with your tongue. There was no turning back, you felt like you could get addicted to this, watching Ford through lidded eyes slowly lose his composure. The man who came across as fully put together and slightly egotistical was slowly unravelling before you. 

You breathed through your nose as you decided to take the challenge to fully take him in your mouth. It was difficult due to the girth of him, but you hollowed your cheeks, feeling him hit the back of your throat. Ford almost broke the armrests of the chair as he felt the vibrations of your moans against his dick.

“Fuck- If you keep doing that I’m not gonna last too-” His words were cut off by a loud groan as you sucked him, the lewd noises filling the air. “Shit!” He gasped. 

You’d never heard Ford curse before. His words and the erotic sounds he made caused you to shuffle your thighs together for relief. You could feel yourself getting wetter and almost felt like you could cum just by that. You knew he was getting close to releasing, but before he could do that you released him with a pop. He thought you were going to finish him off with your hands, but instead you went back to teasing his tip with your tongue.

“Sweetheart, I’m gonna need you to- Fuck- Can you open your mouth?” His voice was shaking.

You obliged and before you could process anything his hand was in your hair, forcing you to take him all the way again with your mouth. You groaned against him, slightly gagging which only added to his pleasure. He began to bob your head up and down his cock, fucking your face. His sudden control of the situation turned you on to an extent that surprised yourself. You looked up at him, making eye contact with him, He seemed to be fully out of it, his usual uptight self gone.

With one last moan from you, he completely let go. He threw his head back with a loud groan, his hands still on your head, forcing you to take him from the base of his dick. You tasted the salty cum on your tongue. You choked as he continued to pump cum down your throat (seriously, when was the last time he ejaculated?). He let go of your hair and you released him.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me.” he said through heavy breaths. “You don’t have to-”

Before he could finish his sentence he watched you swallow with a shocked expression on his face. 

“Or you can I guess…”

You both tried to catch your breaths before you stood up and wrapped arms around Ford.

“See? Wasn’t that worth it?” You said as you gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Ford was stiff and was still trying to process everything.

“You ok?”

“Yeah… Can I be honest about something?”

“Of course.” You responded, still giving him pecks on the cheek.

“I’ve… never done anything like that before…”

You leaned back with your jaw dropped, “You’ve… never had a blowjob? But I thought… You dated a siren, right?”

Ford rubbed the nape of his neck, “Well… it never got that far.. It was only about a month or two..”

“Oh my God. So you’re a…?”

Ford sighed, “Virgin. Yes.”

You chuckled, “No wonder all you want to do is kiss me.”

“Hey, it’s not like you don’t want to either…”

You tell Ford was slightly uncomfortable by the conversation. You just hugged him tighter and he patted your back awkwardly.

“I’m honored to be your first blowjob.” You smiled and Ford snorted in response.

“I don’t know how much of an honor that is.”

“It is! Was it good?”

“It was… amazing.” Ford stared dreamily at the ceiling and you laughed heartily. “Are you sure you don’t need any help… getting off?”

You were taken aback by his offer.

“Thank you Ford. But I don’t want to overwhelm you too much. I think I’ll be dealing with it on my own tonight.” You winked at Ford causing him to grin in response.

“That’s very kind of you to-”

Before he could finish his sentence, there was the sound of the door opening. You immediately let go of Ford and he turned his chair in the opposite direction to tuck his dick back into his pants.

“Grunkle Ford..” Dipper called out before catching you with his eyes. “Oh you’re here…”

You gave him an awkward smile. “Glad to see you too Dipper.”

He ignored you, “Grunkle Ford, you said we were gonna play Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons today.”

“Wait a minute, Dipper. I’ll be up there as soon as possible.”

You and Ford glanced at each other. You saw that he still needed time to regain his composure.

Dipper walked out of the lab disappointedly.

“What’s the matter kid?” Stan asked Dipper before Mabel chimed in as well.

“Ford has been hanging out a lot with y/n lately… We’ve hardly been able to talk now.”

“Maybe…” Mabel’s eyes lit up. “Maybe they’re dating!”

“Don’t start with that sweetie. Sixer’s way too old for her. I don’t even wanna think about that.”

“Yeah Mabel, that’s weird.”

“Is it really though? I bet they like each other. I’ll put money on it.”

“Oooh a little bit of gambling. I’ll join.” Stan responded.

“Yeah you’re on.”

They all gave each other handshakes. Mabel though was determined to win no matter what. 

[scurvyboy]

and he may ask himself "well, how did i get here?"

[provide-milk]

Almost done with chapter 3 and working on a list of spicy Ford headcanons 😋 Hope you guys will enjoy it!

[miloheilo]

Same man I was before

[mroddmod]

the queen of the disco or whatever

[provide-milk]

Pt 2: Do You Know What You're Doing To Me?: Ford Pines x Reader

⚠️Minors do not interact with! NSFW!⚠️

Read Chapter 1 here! https://www.tumblr.com/provide-milk/764006882654437376/do-you-know-what-youre-doing-to-me?source=share

It was obvious. He was ignoring you

It seemed like he was avoiding the gift shop like the plague, mainly only coming out to use the kitchen for meals before secluding himself again in the lab. It hurt especially when you noticed he wouldn’t even make eye-contact with you or acknowledge your presence in the room. You would try to say your normal greetings but would instead be met with an awkward nod of the head. You wanted to believe that it had something to do with work, but you knew the truth. It was because of you. It wasn’t just you who noticed this behavior, but everyone else as well.

Mabel and Dipper would become quiet, even if they were in the middle of an argument if Ford walked into specifically the gift shop, whispering to each other what they think could possibly be bothering Ford so much in the room.

“Maybe there’s a ghost in the room that’s feeding off his energy!” Mabel exclaimed once while Dipper only sighed and responded with, “If there were ghosts in the room Ford would’ve gotten rid of them by now.”

Stanley was the only one who connected the dots.

“Kid…” He stepped towards you. “Why is Sixer acting weirder than normal?”

“I have no idea, Stanley.”

“I know you’re lying to me. He’s been acting different ever since you went down there with him. What did you do to him?”

“I didn’t do anything!”

Stan glared at you, “You did something to make him act all strange.”

You winced at his words because you knew it was true. It was your fault. Things might’ve been normal if you left him alone.

“I must’ve done something… But I don’t know what it is…” You lied.

Stan narrowed his eyes before sighing, “Well I can’t stand how quiet it gets when old Poindexter shows up. So you guys gotta figure out how to make things normal again.”

There was a pause before Stan began to talk again, “We are running out of cereal… How about you and sixer take the kids to go get some. Will force you guys to have to stand each other for a little bit.”

“But Stan-”

“Nope. Deal with it.”

You threw your head back with a groan. You felt like Ford hated you right now, but there was a flutter of excitement deep inside you. You still found Ford attractive. Nothing changed about your feelings. If anything, the kiss riled you up even more.

Especially when you were alone in your room, replaying it in your mind over and over again. You’d shift your thighs together, trying to get some sort of relief without going all the way. But you couldn’t help yourself. You recalled that desperate look in his eyes, the feeling of his clothed erection pressing against you, the wet and wild way he kissed you like he was starving for you. It was too much to handle.

Well, it’s not like he would ever know about this. You threw off your pajama pants to the side and your fingers met their way under your panties. You pressed two fingers between your folds, gasping at the contact while your other hand went to palm at one of your breasts. You were ashamed at how wet you were already. Ashamed at the way you moaned when you imagined your fingers being Ford’s while you inserted two of them inside you. It was a bit of a stretch, but you felt that with Ford’s big fingers it would be a similar feeling. If anything it would be so much better. You saw the way he handled dice when he played Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons.

“Fuck, I shouldn’t be thinking about that.” You thought to yourself. But you still didn’t stop moving your fingers, almost cringing at the squelching noise they made. 

You closed your eyes, imagining Ford’s mouth on your clit while he spread you open with his fingers.

“Wow you’re really worked up over this. How long have you been imagining this?” You could imagine his familiar voice saying. 

“Ford.” You gasped, this time out loud.

You imagined him praising you between eating you out. Would he compliment the way your body squirmed desperately under his fingers? Would he call you a good girl if you came just by the way he worked you with his mouth? 

You threw your head back with one last moan of Ford’s name, cumming as you tried to overstimulate yourself with your fingers. Fuck, this felt sinful. Masturbating to a man who you made extremely uncomfortable. As you calmed down from your high, you cringed as you remembered Ford ignoring you. Oh yeah, that was the reality of things. Part of you regretted ever kissing him and another part felt on Cloud 9 just thinking about it. You felt torn, but there was one thing for certain, he kissed you back. He wanted you so desperately like you wanted him.

“Maybe he’s also getting off thinking about it. He probably doesn’t hate me… He… Maybe he wants to fuck me so bad he’s worried his self control will snap if he sticks around me.”

Bingo. That made the most sense to you and man did it fill you up with ego. The thought of a man like him wanting to fuck you too. Who wouldn’t be complimented by that? 

“But… it’ll probably never happen… I guess this is the closest I’ll ever get…” You muttered to yourself as you looked at your cum covered fingers. “Jeez, what has gotten into me?”

You recollected that night as Ford entered the gift shop, holding the keys to the car. Now the both of you weren’t looking at each other and the tension in the air could be cut with a knife.

Ford cleared his throat, “You kids ready?” He said to the twins but you swear it could’ve been directed towards you too.

You honestly wanted to get into the back of the car with the twins but you were surprised that Ford opened the door to the passenger seat for you and beckoned you in. He still didn’t make any eye contact with you as you said thank you. He just responded with another nod of his head

“Man, he’s hot but he can be so rude.” You thought to yourself. 

Thank goodness for the twins because if it wasn’t for them you swore it would’ve been a quiet car ride. Mabel led a game of 20 questions in which of course Ford was the winner each time which made you smile to yourself.

“Ok we are just here for cereal.” Ford warned the twins as he got out of the car.

“Ok uncle Ford…” the kids said in unison but judging by both of the looks on their faces they didn’t believe a single bit of it.

As they went through the aisles, Ford looked for some healthier options for dinner. You decided that maybe now would be a good time to approach him.

“Ford…” You said softly. “Can we find a time to ta-“

Before you could even respond, Mabel came barreling down the aisle with two bags of the sugariest candy that could possibly be found in the whole market. 

“Ford! Y/n! Please can we get these! Please! They are by the same creator of Smile Dip!”

You looked over to see Dipper shaking his head and looking at you with eyes that said, “Please don’t do it.”

You could see Ford thinking it through before responding with a final, “Absolutely not.”

Mabel groaned and you frowned.

“I think you should let her get the candy.”

Dipper’s expression looked concerned,“I don’t think you should do that.”

Ford locked eyes with you for what felt like the first time in forever. 

“No, she doesn’t need the candy.”

“But she wants the candy. We should just get it for her.”

“Exactly!” Mabel exclaimed.

Ford crossed his arms, “She’ll be fine without it.”

“But she’ll be craving it.”

“Just because she’s craving it doesn’t mean she should have it.”

“Sometimes you should just give into your cravings.”

You could see Ford starting to get frustrated, “Not if they're not good for you or the other person.”

Oh.

“Well maybe the other person wants them to give into their cravings.”

The twins now looked at each other, confused.

“I told you, it’s not good for her. She’s too young. Sugar like that is bad for someone at that age.”

“I think she’s old enough to make decisions for herself.”

“That’s what you think!” Ford was starting to lose his composure.

“Well maybe Ford, you should just listen to me for once and see that I can make decisions too! Even if I am ‘younger.’”

“You’re not gonna convince me.” Ford’s tone was serious.

“Oh I think I will convince you actually. Cause you want the candy just as much as I do!”

Now the twins were starting to back up to put the candy back, their eyes still on whatever was happening in front of them.

“Are you getting this?” Dipper whispered.

“Not at all.” Mabel muttered.

“Ok, maybe I do want the candy- but- ugh- kids come on, let’s just get these items and get going.”

“Does that mean I’m getting the candy?” Mabel whispered to Dipper.

“Just… put it back.”

“Yeah… you’re right.”

The car ride back was silent, you could see that Ford was speeding slightly. His hands were gripping the steering wheel tight and the twins were giving each other glances. You stared out the side window, watching as you sped past the trees. You were annoyed too and avoided looking at Ford.

As Ford parked the car and the twins got out, you went to do the same. You went to open the door only for Ford to lock you in.

“Ford! What the he-”

“We’re gonna go for a ride and settle this.”

“What do you-” you replied, slightly stunned. 

“You know exactly what I mean.”

You didn’t know where Ford was taking you. You kept glancing over at him but he seemed to be deep in thought. You didn’t want to poke the bear any further.

He parked at the edge of a cliff, overlooking a lake. You couldn’t even take in the view with your emotions all over the place. You fiddled with your hands as Ford took a deep sigh.

“Look… I know you’ve been thinking about what happened that day, but I just want you to know that’ll never happen again and I want us to leave it in the past.”

“And forget it ever happened? Is that really what you expect?”

Ford paused, “Well that’s what I was hoping for, yes…”

“How am I supposed to do that! You kissed me back and it wasn’t just an ordinary kiss. It was long and-”

“Ok you can stop there.” Ford cut you off, with a tinge of pink blossoming over his cheeks. “Maybe I did… But I’d appreciate it if we can act like it never happened.”

“Like it never happened?” You exclaimed. “You started it!”

“Me? No, I believe you’re remembering things wrong.”

“You flirted with me!”

Ford’s brows furrowed, “I was not flirting. I was simply complimenting you back the way YOU were complimenting me.”

“But you knew I liked you, right?”

“I wasn’t certain…”

You crossed your arms, with a huff, turning your head towards the side window. 

Ford took a deep breath, “I suppose this is gonna be a lot harder to figure out than I expected.”

“You think?”

It was silent once again, both of you were pondering what to say next in this situation.

“I just don’t want to lose the friendship we had before this all happened and I’m sorry I got your hopes up. That was my mistake. I should’ve never done what I did and I wish there was a way I could make it up to you but there isn’t. I’d really appreciate it if we could move past this.”

Your eyes were now starting to well up with tears. You didn’t know why. It was just a stupid crush anyways is what you told yourself. You met his eyes and you could see his expression soften with guilt.

“Would you accept me if I was old enough?”

Ford sighed, “I’d rather not answer that question.”

“You would…” You grumbled. “And you know it.”

“Maybe I would… But that’s not something we should think about.” Ford said softly. “Dear… Please don’t make this harder than it has to be.” He reached towards the hand on your lap but you pushed it away.

“Don’t call me that.”

As it became quiet, Ford went to put the keys back in the ignition.

“You know I just think it’s funny how-”

Ford immediately took the keys out of the ignition, focusing on you again.

“- You want this too and the only person you are stopping is yourself. Geez, you think someone who was in a portal for 30 years, traveling through dimensions, would be a little more willing to live it up. But now suddenly you want to play by all the rules. Are you becoming boring now?”

You could tell that your words cut deep, as Ford didn’t respond, but you were too upset to apologize. 

Ford’s eyes narrowed at you, “You think I’m becoming ‘boring?’”

“Yes.”

“Well…” Ford hesitated for a moment. “Would someone who’s boring do this?”

Ford leaned over the center console, his eyes scanning you as he leaned in closer.

“You keep this between us. Promise me that.”

Your heart felt like it was ready to burst out of your chest.

“I promise.”

“Meaning that you keep this between us too.”

He brushed his hand against your cheek, causing your face to heat up immediately. He gazed into your eyes with a soft expression before gently meeting your lips. It was a tender kiss, but slowly became more and more sensual. Your arms wrapped around Ford’s neck, pulling him in even closer, receiving a grunt from him in response but he obliged. The finger that grazed your cheek was shaking slightly, possibly from nervousness. Nonetheless you both seemed unhurried to stop. You tugged at his bottom lip between your teeth and received a gasp from him. You smiled against his lips. He pulled away slowly, both of your eyes fluttering open. His face was flushed, as you both caught your breaths. 

“You’re a good kisser.” Ford complimented and you giggled in response. 

“You’re not too bad either.”

He smiled at you softly. “I’m surprised, as I haven’t kissed anyone in quite some time.”

“I guess you're just good with your mouth.”

Both of you went bright red at the sudden change in mood. He began to take your arms off of him gently.

“Oh I-shit- didn’t mean it in a dirty way. I just meant like-”

“I think it’s time we get back, don't you?” Ford said while he put the keys in the ignition, but you swore you could see him trying to hold back a laugh. 

[noodles-and-tea]

Fordsy redraws ;)