Public School Quotes

Anything you say can and will be used for my entertainment. Also feel free to submit any fun quotes to me!

[public-schoolquotes]

Student: You need a snickers!

Teacher: I need a cigarette.

[public-schoolquotes]

"I have fish sticks in my eyeballs"

[public-schoolquotes]

bio teacher: whenever people read nutrition labels they're like "oh my god, cholesterol"

whole class: "oH mY gOd ChoLeStErOl"

[public-schoolquotes]

“Vegans are bad, they’re eating the rainforest.”

[public-schoolquotes]

*In lab*

Student 1: So, how do we know that this is actually meningitis?

Student 2: Well, there are two ways to tell.

First, dump it in the town water supply and see what happens,

Or

Two, someone takes one for the team and chugs it.

Student 1: Who will be our martyr?

Student 3: I will!

The rest of the students: Chug, Chug, Chug!

The teacher: *In the back, looking mildly horrified*

[public-schoolquotes]

“We’re not humans, we’re students.”

[public-schoolquotes]

student: NAME THREE THINGS YOU USE EVERY DAY!”

teacher: …uh…. car, toothbrush, door.

student: yOU DIDN’T SAY MATH!

[public-schoolquotes]

“Unlike you, I have tea to spill 

*slams Yoyo into wall at full force”

[public-schoolquotes]

“Oh shit a chicken nugget!” “Dude we haven’t had chicken nuggets for lunch in like two wee- nO DON’T EAT IT MINA” “It’s actually still pretty good!” “Dude I’m not gonna visit you in the hospital when you inevitably die.”

[public-schoolquotes]

Guitar Teacher: *pointing to Student A* You have long thumbs, I don't know what we're going to do about that

Student B: Chop em off!

Guitar Teacher: No, no! Calm down we're not chopping anybody's thumbs off

Guitar Teacher: At least, not the entire thumb

[public-schoolquotes]

*kid chugs half a bottle of lotion*

“How does it taste?”

“Tastes like fire. Better than the lunches though.”

“…… ”

“It burns.”

[public-schoolquotes]

Girl: You look a lot like your mom!

Teacher: Don't you dare insult me like that.

[public-schoolquotes]

Student: “Come on guys! Let’s snort this sour patch kid dust!”

Teacher: *sighs and lays head on desk* “Teach the next generation they said. It’ll be great they said.”

[public-schoolquotes]

“I’m an aggravated lesbian, give me my corn dog!”

[public-schoolquotes]

"Becoming a stripper is rapidly becoming plan A"

[public-schoolquotes]

“Alright, [student], for all the marbles: Where is Florida?”

“Uhm... Europe?”

“...You cannot be serious.”

“South America??”

[public-schoolquotes]

“It’s like an aquatic chicken!”

“Do you mean a duck?”