Pseudologia Fantastica

I do know where the wild things go

[puranium-blog]

Where the wild things go?

they go along to take your honey 

[puranium-blog]

April made his majestic entrance through the window

And I was too weak to bow,

The wind caressed my wounds,

Scents played with my senses.

The stars touched my scars

Trees didn’t get me out my troubles.

Melodies melted with my being

Strangers strolled along my mind.

Longing landed on my soul

Lust lost its way out of it

Lovers locked themselves in there.

Metaphors metamorphosed into nonsense

Stings of sin swallowed my scruples

Strikes of sanity scared me

The Consumption of too many presumptions

Overdoses will doubtfully over my game

Hopefully I get to watch over my dead body.

[puranium-blog]

Bride

She was to be wed 

Promised to the void 

 For the unknown; she was a bride. 

A warm heart laying on a cold bed. 

 My mellow lips kissed her forehead 

Frigid 

On her deserted body, My tears rained.

 She was no longer mine to hold 

But by the ground, she was to be devoured. 

 Better off dead 

 Said dad. 

 Just pray for her, it'll be heard 

Mom said.

 From death you can not hide 

 She murmured.

[puranium-blog]

Despair clinging on to my interiors,

Like a disease, or worst, like a habit.

Sketching with steel on my wrist,

Salted drops turn red.

Freezing iceberg burn me inside

Solid surface, trembling underground

My sense for sense that, I left behind.

My words are trapped in a labyrinth.

I can’t get them outside.

Or I just did ?

[puranium-blog]

RED

Red,

Red as the burning flame inside her heart

Red as her cheeks color when he kissed her.

Red as her irritated skin

Skin,

What keeps her inside of her

What buries her torture.

What covers her lies.

Lies,

Lies that die to be freed,

Lies that lie on her neck

Lies that try to strangle her.

They only see red skin and she only feels strangling lies

[puranium-blog]

Days

Today I’m feeling good

or was it yesterday 

Yesterday God was dead

or is it today,

Everyday I’m weak,

Not every day I weep.

Some days I only sleep.

I crumble under bed sheets

Close my eyes, counting sheep

Play with thoughts,

Lay with memories,

A dead end,

A never ending circle

[puranium-blog]

lips talk

I want you to religiously kiss me

Hard like a rough wind shackles the trees

Soft like dew drops gently kiss the leaves

I want you to unexpectedly kiss me

Bring me back to life

Let our beings unite in one

I want you to take your time in kissing me

May it be just a second

May it be a life time

[puranium-blog]

Nothing

Seven o’clock, time to get up

The sound of the alarm shook her body out its slumber

Took the numbness out of her mind

She would’ve liked to stay that way forever

A numb mind and a sleeping body

Forever hypnotized,

Forever belonging to another world

A world where you get to not think

Not about the horrors of the present existence

Nor about the anticipated failures of the future

Nothing.  

[puranium-blog]

free

What she loved the most about herself was that she didn’t know herself, not quite well, not a tiny bit. That was freeing because she allowed herself to be anything, to do anything and to fall in love with anyone. She could wake up one day deciding that she was passionate about photography so she would take her dads dusty old Leika and go on a hunt for a picture. Other days she would wake up telling herself that her loved one wasn’t the one so she would gently tell him so.

In mornings she was the nine year old reckless kid who suddenly shows interest in knowing everything about life and at evenings she turned into the wise ninety year old who knows more about life than Buddha himself. She was nothing and everything. She was free.

[puranium-blog]

I have a photograph of myself when I was barely 6 year old, dressed up in a traditional outfit.

That dress was a heavy burden to my little body, accessorized with all the jewelry that did nothing but tiring up my fragile bones. My face was all glowing, not because of happiness but rather because of all the cosmetics on my skin. My hair, caged in a tight hairstyle was screaming for help, along with the inexplicably big of a crown they put on my head.

Why didn’t I say no, I ask myself, why didn’t I shout to express my immense disagreement to what they did to me, I hated it, every single part of it. Nobody ever told me that it’s wrong to let people force me into doing stuff.

Maybe if I said No that day, I wouldn’t grow up to be this weak, I wouldn’t grow up to subconsciously do anything to satisfy other people.

[puranium-blog]

still

She stood still, suffering silently. Serene soul, slightly sinful. Same sad sky, same scenic sunset. Seeking senses shield, sacrificing sensibility. Singing some Smiths song, surprisingly sweet. Sinking sorrows so smoothly. Strangely satisfied.

[puranium-blog]

I once wanted you to be mine

I once wanted you to be mine Like a moon belongs to the night forever shining so bright I once wanted you to be mine hand in hand we cross this river Through those lands and trees that shiver I once wanted you to be mine and I didn't want your freedom to be taken away From you dear, I just wanted you to stay. I once wanted you to be mine In a room, dusty and old you could've kissed me you could've been bold. I once wanted you to be mine I'll always want you to be mine

[puranium-blog]

Emma

Tangled hair, cold hands.

Tangled thoughts, colder heart.

Blue hair, grey skirt.

Blue mood, grey sky.

Angelic breath, demonic head.

Angels to beware of, demons to befriend.

Sleepy face, scarred thighs, 

Sleepless nights, scared of life.

Weak body, sick even, 

weaker conscience and sicker days.

[puranium-blog]

Shattered glass on the floor, teary eyes and a throat so sour. Messy room, messy mind, miserable life and a heart so kind, blind maybe, wild for sure, pitiful at times, overall so pure, obscure until dawn, shimmery by midnight buried on daytime, flying every night. How odd he said to have such heart and look so dead My whole life is inside, Not so odd she replied. Because the world outside, is something long time ago I left aside.

[puranium-blog]

You know how people love at first sight, I feared you at first sight. Our eyes met, and I saw in yours all the pain you are willing to inflict upon me, all the hate that our love will turn into, all the sleepless nights that are ahead, all the tears. I was afraid you and you smiled because you knew.

[puranium-blog]

Blatherings.

I’m Kafka’s unsaid words, Dali’s unfinished paintings, Neruda’s forgotten metaphors and Plato’s wrong theories. I’m the battlefields most frightened soldier, the shores most silent wave and the nights most dull dreams. I’m the autumn leaf that refused to fall . The tree that wasn’t covered in snow on winter. I’m the flower that didn’t bloom on spring and the land that was left to burn under the cruel summer heat. I’m life’s secret admirer, I write her unsigned poems that she doesn’t even care to read, or that she throws away. I write her simple words, I ask her what should I do to win her heart. I’m miserable now, heaven knows.

[puranium-blog]

One day my dear,

The sun will shine out of the window

Straight on your face

You will wake up, all slow

All alone, no one to embrace.

One day my dear,

He will pack his bags at night,

No regrets, no goodbye

All sneaky, all quite

Rushing up to catch his flight.

One day my dear,

A rusty knife will cut through

Your chest, you won’t even bleed

It will just hurt you.

His warm hug is all you’ll need.

One day my dear,

He’ll do the inevitable,

After promising you the moon.

He’ll do what you thought unthinkable,

He’ll do it promptly, so soon.