This is my Tumblr mood :)

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the irony of

me sorting through all the grad photos I had my little sister take on my iphone the day of graduation while my parents packed my apartment so I was sweaty from packing and my makeup was fs NOT fresh and the camera was my iphone and my sister is 17 and most definitely not interested in photography

yet I currently sit next to my sister and my mom who are discussing the professional photographer they’re booking for lil sis’ senior photos in a location an hour away 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

when I was told I wanted professional photos taken my mom’s response was “don’t worry about it, we’ll figure it out later. plus you won’t want to send anything out anyway until you can say you have a job.”

suuuuuper cool mom. I love that all 3 of your children are definitely treated the same 😀

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men’s arms

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In particular, Ashton Irwin’s arms 😌

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men’s arms

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damn, crying just really takes all the energy out of me

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🧍‍♀️

do you ever just wrap up a 2.5 hour phone call after a 2.5 hour club meeting after a 2 hour Zoom call and really need to pee but right as you hang up the phone you hear the door to the bathroom close and you hope your roommate is just going pee or just washing their face before bed but no, you then hear the shower turn on and now you have to wait to go pee for another 30-45 minutes…

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pet peeve: when I mention that I have gotten my gold award and someone else says “heck yeah I got my eagle” and I ask them what theirs was about and they tell me and then just don’t ask me what mine was about… 🧍‍♀️

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does Mom remember what it was like to be 22? did she feel what I feel? did she feel the overwhelm that comes with being on the precipice of college graduation with no plan? with a weak plan? can she relate to me? can she empathize or merely sympathize? she had a plan. she knew since freshman year when she signed the deal with the army. maybe she can’t empathize.

does she know what it’s like to be 22 and never experienced romance? by my age she had been dating her future husband (my wonderful, loving father) for 10 months. she’d had boyfriends before. she’d broken up with them before. and yet here I am: 22 years and 4 months in this world and no boyfriends, no break ups, no hand holdings or kisses. no confessions of love, or even mere interest. and by this time Mom had met the love of her life.

I want to make Mom proud. I want to make Mom happy. but where I struggle she had security. she hasn’t lived it. how far can sympathy go? comparison is the thief of joy and right now I feel. I feel lots of things but only know how to bottle them up and move on… till I explode. maybe I know how I feel. maybe I don’t. maybe I don’t want to admit it. maybe I don’t want to think about it. I think I just want to move on.

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why is it not socially acceptable to adjust your underwear at the gym? 😞

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It’s so silly that we only have one word for “love.”

1 Peter 1:22

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the urge to take my spine out and put it in the freezer

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so I just asked my roommate to vacuum (a literal 5 minute task) since I just spent an hour cleaning the bathroom and taking out the trash and our other roommate spent an hour washing dishes and cleaning the kitchen. her response to me was “no I actually can’t do that until later in the week because I have a lot going on. I have to study and my mom comes home this week” (from an international trip). Like??? Miss ma’am — vacuuming literally takes 5 minutes. You cannot take FIVE MINUTES in the next 36 hours to vacuum the living room and hallway??

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how do I say “y’all” in a british accent?

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Lizzy McAlpine Instagram live Dec 3, 2021

I See the Light from Tangled (2010)

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being in the library all day during week 4 is depressing. like it ain’t even midterms yet. I get living here during finals but damn, Tuesday of week 4??

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uhhhhh I’ve had one meal in the last 37 hours… and I can’t eat for another hour bc I’m in class rn 🙃

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coping with concerts.

Phil has leukemia.

I (basically) met Louis Tomlinson.

Also I’m currently reading a book that’s so dang good but I haven’t done homework in 5ever. (book is: hands down by mariana zapata and I’m reading it as a pdf on my phone lol)

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