It was sometime past noon by the time the letter reached the kartha's office.
Kartha Varadha Raja Mannar.
It was first time he got a letter in these 7 years. Especially from the man he used to love. Used to? His mind asked. It wasn't just a letter. It was a note. Only later he found out that it was a suicide note and by the time he did it was too late.
Varadha wondered what was there in the letter. What is it that made deva write to him. He could smell deva's scent on it, after so many years. He looked at the letter for a minute and opend it.
I don't think I'll be alive by the time you read this letter. I decided to put an end to the voices in my head. I know you very well ra, so please don't think there was anything you could do to change this. This is a decision i made and this is what was written in my fate.
I know you hate me for not saving baachi that day. Sorry i couldn't save him, i had to make a choice that day. It was either you or baachi i could save. I chose you and even if I go back in time I'll always choose you.
Two years i waited for you to call me back. I tried to convince myself that maybe somewhere deep down you still loved me. I too was growing old ra, the lonliness started eating me up. Slowly the guilt of not saving baachi crept into my mind. I tried to get busy with work or play with the kids to distract myself but at nights, when I'm alone it's only you i can all think about. Even though we spent very little time together you are deeply imprinted in my soul.
But recently whenever i think about you all i can see is the pain stricken face of yours, eyes red with tears flowing down your cheeks as you held baachi's body and cried. The betrayal and disgust I saw in your eyes thats all i can remember. I tried my best to continue living for you and amma but I don't think i can do it anymore. I'm tired of all this. It's only blood I can see on my hands. I see a monster staring back at me whenever i look in the mirror. This is the best for us ra. For you and for amma.
I always thought the love i had for you was the greatest in my life. But these voices in my head won over the love I have for you. Please take care of amma for me. You are all that she has now. Consider this my last wish.
I love you vara, you know where you'll find me. I hope that maybe in another universe our story doesn't end like this.
No one in khansaar knows what happened all of a sudden. The kartha, their beloved Varadha Raja Mannar renounced the throne to Bhaarava. No one knows where he has gone or why he gave away the throne. There were rumors that he had left khansaar.
It wasn't just deva that died, the remaining part that was left alive in varadha died too. The part of him that kept him going in life, the part that hoped to maybe one day he can go back into deva's arms died. Now he was just a living corpse. Living for the sake of amma as it was deva's last wish.
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