TENDER HEART.

you'll meet her, she's very pretty, even though sometimes, she's sad for many days at a time. you'll see, when she smiles, you'll love her. ind. marvel based original character. semi-private. est. 2015, rebooted 2016. written by august.

[illwriteatragedyar]

         “Have you had any water today?”

he checks her forehead to see if it feels warm. it’s normal – not feverish. she could be down with anything, but he worries for her most when she gets sick of all his children because of her struggle through the first decade of life. 

             “Did you get enough rest last night?”

he smooths the hair away from her face, trying to find a cause for it. 

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Yeah. Lots.”

it doesn’t feel as bad as it normally does. maybe she’ll wake up in the morning and be fine, maybe it’s nothing, maybe she can sleep it off and be back to normal for school in the morning.

she shrugs, shoulders hunched.

          “I don’t know. It was cold all night.”

she’d thought of sneaking into andrew’s room to steal his blankets and decided against it sometime around three a.m.

[illwriteatragedyar]

his brow goes down in concern immediately. setting his paperwork aside on the nightstand, he holds his arms out to her.

          “Come here, sweetheart. What’s              feeling bad?”

[pxzhar-blog]

she crawls into bed on the side her mother usually  occupies and curls up next to him.

          “My head hurts.”

which is all fine and good, normally, except it’s been a constant throb in her temples for the better half of the day that she’s tried to ignore and failed.

          “And my chest feels -- I don’t know. Stuffy.”

[dailydormer]

Now that I’m in my midthirties, I know what suits me: a pair of jeans, cool boots, and a long coat. It’s about knowing my body and wearing my confidence.

[illwriteatragedyar]

@pxzhar

it’s late when she sneaks a peek around his door. josephine gone, he’s stayed up with the light on, finishing paperwork. 

      “Hey Goose. What’s up?”

[pxzhar-blog]

he catches her looking, which is exactly what she’d wanted, but she still slinks into the room like she doesn’t belong there.

          “I don’t feel good.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

       “Yes. I – I want to.”

before ellie can say something else, she pulls up her messages, avery’s number, and text her: 

want to go bowling sometime this weekend?

then, realizing what she has done, screams and throws  the phone across the table.

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Okay.”

she watches willow text her, smiles again, and hides a laugh behind her hand as the phone goes sliding across the table.

          “Willow, Willow.”

this entire family is too dramatic for its own good.

          “Want me to see what she says when she            texts back?”

[maksimumvoltazh]

         “Well – okay – I’ll ask – “

her face starts to heat up again with just the  thought of it. she takes a few deep breaths, puts a hand on her inhaler, then relaxes.

         “Maybe – bowling?”

if andrew was there, a lot of the tension would be diffused, if there was any. 

[pxzhar-blog]

          “-- -- you okay?”

she backs off, just a little, because she doesn’t want willow to think she’s pushing her into some- thing she doesn’t want to do.

          “If you don’t want to, it’s okay, too. There’s           always other times, or -- anything you want.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

        “Yikes!”

she laughs nervously.

        “I – I could ask her, maybe – if she – I           could.”

it’s not like they didn’t talk. but – asking to hang out was a whole different story. it wasn’t weird. she wouldn’t make it weird.

        “I could – do that.”

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Yikes nothing! It’ll be fun.”

hopefully andrew doesn’t have any plans, but if he does, they’ll be easy enough to cancel. the puppy dog eyes never fail, especially if she throws willow’s name into the mix.

          “You should. We’ll go wherever you want --           the movies, bowling, anywhere.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

       “You’re right, I don’t know.”

she’ll be positive about it until turned down  officially, if it ever were to get that far. opening her phone, she looks her up and shows her the selfie page.

there are practically hearts in her eyes as she  scrolls through them.

         “See? She’s…” a dreamy sigh,            “Something else.”

[pxzhar-blog]

she peers over willow’s shoulder and follows her  as she scrolls, eyes flickering between the photos she’s showing her and the smile she can see on willow’s face. 

it’s adorable, really, and she can’t help but crack another smile.

          “She’s cuu-te, Willow.”

nodding in approval, she nudges her shoulder.

          “You should, like. Invite her out this weekend.            Me and Andrew will take you guys somewhere.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

          “Yes. And, I like every selfie she posts,            just so that maybe she gets the idea – “

oh noooo. she’s so embarrassed. 

           “But – I mean – I don’t know if she’s              like me – like that.”

her hands drop, and she fumbles with them.

[pxzhar-blog]

          “That’s the way to do it.”

she laughs, slides her stool onto willow’s side of the table.

          “Let me see, let me see.”

her smile dips, just a little, before she nudges her gently in the shoulder.

          “Hey, you never know.”

she doesn’t want willow to get her hopes up only to get hurt, but there’s no way of knowing, either.

          “You know Izzy didn’t know with Octavia            until Octavia asked her on a date.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

        “Oh noooo.”

she covers her face with both her hands, then peeks out of a finger.

        “Her name is Avery. And – she’s really           nice, and really cute – and – “

she covers her face again.

        “I’m so embarrassed!” 

[pxzhar-blog]

          “I knew it.”

she grins, leaning in further across the table.

          “Don’t be -- hey, don’t be embarrassed or           anything, really. It’s okay.”

she wishes izzy were here.

          “She sounds -- Avery, what a cute name.           Are you guys on, like -- Facebook? Or           something?”

[maksimumvoltazh]

         “Oh, um – “

her face shoots up in red, and she slurps up her smoothie for a distraction. how to tell ellie about – her crush – her brain wracks around for something.

         “They – well – they’re really smart.            Um. Kind of like? Tough and – really            cute?”

like, willow wouldn’t mind getting her first kiss at all from this person.

[pxzhar-blog]

she notices the red creeping into willow’s face. her smile grows, just a little, slowly but surely.

          “They, huh?”

she lets the silence linger for a minute before she asks, very carefully,

          “What’s her name?”

[maksimumvoltazh]

          “Right, I know!”

she has barely touched the smoothie in front of her  she’s been babbling about school and her classmates so much. Freshman year was a hard year.

           “And I am already into someone now,             so, he doesn’t even matter.”

and, as an afterthought,

            “I have great hair.”

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Forget him. Honestly. Like, what a tool.”

her eyebrows shoot up.

          “Ooh, who?”

she doesn’t mind sitting and listening, even if the conversation has leapt from one thing to another quicker than she can keep up. if willow wants to talk and talk and talk, she’ll listen.

grinning,

          “You do. The best, honestly, thanks to me.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

@pxzhar

         “And then he told me my hair was           a mess, and he wouldn’t date anyone           with messy hair, and I wasn’t into him           anyway? But he didn’t have to be so           rude.”

[pxzhar-blog]

she listens intently, sucks the last bit of smoothie up through her straw, and makes a face. boys.

          “What a di-- rude human being.”

she catches herself, peeks to make sure no one is around anyway, and leans back in.

          “You don’t want anyone like that, trust me. Like,            if he’s going to comment on something as small            as your hair, then you’re better off.”

[yadikiy]

          “I would have. Me and Izzy, a tag team.”

he isn’t joking. had he been hear, heard what he did to both mama and ellie, he would have kicked his ass. brother or not, ridley had overstepped the lines. 

           “I think he just needs a reality check. I’m             sure he’ll get it soon enough, for Willow’s              sake.”

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Izzy would’ve annihilated him.”

she wonders if their father has called her yet or if she still doesn’t know. it wouldn’t surprise her, if she didn’t. she’d heard her parents quiet voices behind their bed- room door as she’d slipped down the hall toward her own room and doesn’t know if they’ve come out since.

          “Hopefully.”

feeling around for her phone, she brings up willow’s name and realizes that ridley’s probably taken it.

          “-- --- it’s not fair.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

he doesn’t know what else to say to her. how could she understand – their mother had worked so hard to protect them that she did almost too good of a job. they didn’t know yet, what it was like to lose almost everything to being a mutant. a best friend, a girlfriend –

how could you he ever tell willow that she had left because of them? how could he hurt her like that?

he was only doing these things for her own good. someday, she would see.

without saying another word, he slams the door and speeds  off.

[pxzhar-blog]

she doesn’t know what else to say to him, either. he’s never yelled at her like that before and she’s never yelled at him like that before and she’s never heard him say those sorts of things to their mother, either. 

it’s too much; she feels it wrapping up inside her so tight she can’t breathe around it and they’re supposed to be better than this, closer than this; they always have been.

he moves toward the car again and she goes after him.

          “Ridley -- ---”

but he’s gone.

she watches the car disappear around the corner and she’s left standing there on the sidewalk, arms wrapped tight around her middle, and it isn’t until she hears her father call her back inside that she turns to go, too.

[yadikiy]

        “Well, now we’re both on his bad           side now.”

more gently,

        “Look, Mama will knock some sense          into him. If not, dad will beat his ass.”

[pxzhar-blog]

          “Lucky us.”

she shoves herself under his arm and squeezes her eyes shut. 

          “I don’t think he’ll be talking to Mama for           a while, Andrew. Or Dad.”

she peeks up at him again.

          “If you’d been here, you could’ve kicked his           ass. He deserved it.”

[maksimumvoltazh]

           “What do you want me to tell her? How awful it              is? How terrible it is to see the way people look             at you when they find out you’re DIFFERENT?”

sparks fly from his hands, and he struggles to keep them  in check, stop them. he stuffs them in his pockets.

            “Just GO, Ellie! I’m done with this conversation              with you.”

his voice rises higher than it’s ever been to her.

            “GO!!!”

[pxzhar-blog]

she takes a step back, then another, until she’s back on the curb, away from him. behind her, she can hear the door open, though she doesn’t dare look back.

heart thudding in her throat, head dizzy with all this boiling hot anger, she raises her voice to match his, ignores the sharp sting that comes with it because ridley has never, ever yelled at her like this before in their entire lives.

          “I want you to tell her something so she doesn’t           think you’re ashamed of her, too.”

spitefully,

          “She’ll get enough of that from the rest of the           world. I doubt she wants it to come from her own           Dad.”