Classless

I have seen the future and it likes bouncy balls

[quidcumque]

Adderall: Gets me a little "buzzy", makes it harder to sit still or idly veg, thus improving Task Initiation. Improvements to task initiation waned over time. Doses of 15/15 didn't improve concentration. Doses of 20/20 had me finishing projects across 18-hour sessions.

Suppresses hunger, I forget to eat. Raises heart rate and BP a little, but within acceptable levels. Wasn't allowed to do XR because of weight loss from forgetting to eat. Wouldn't consistently remember to do second dose. Feels more like "rescue" drug than maintenance for me.

[quidcumque]

Vyvanse: Very mild effects. Mostly improved Task Switching, i.e. I could work on one thing for a while, then swap out or take a break while actually feeling like I'd be able to return to the first thing afterwards. Effect waned over time. EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Got on the "I'm poor, please give for free" program for a year, but then they axed that in favor of producing a generic. Generic was EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Not worth it.

[quidcumque]

Had to fistfight my new meds gal into taking me off everything (which didn't work or DID work but with narsty side effects) so I could start fresh. No, I do not think I will be "managing my symptoms fine" off the meds. Yes, I still want to go off them TEMPORARILY. No, I am not at risk for suicidal ideation or self harm. No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before, they didn't work, that's why I'm doing all this.

Each step of the process, too ffs. Yes, I am experiencing worsening symptoms. No, I am not experiencing thoughts of suicidal ideation, homocidal ideation, psychosis, or mania. Are you trying to slap me with new diagnoses or are you just bad at describing things in less incendiary terms? No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before.

they didn't work

that's why I'm doing all this

NO I AM NOT EXPERIENCING THOUGHTS OF---

[quidcumque]

Ritalin: 10 mg: mild improvements in task initiation, focus, concentration. No noticeable side effects.

20 mg, first half-week: I AM GETTING SHIT DONE WITH NO FATIGUE. Mild concern over whether I can turn the go juice back off. Caffeine on top possibly bad idea.

20 mg, middle week: Can't sleep. Can't really concentrate, either. Less ideal.

20 mg, final half-week: I can no longer happy.

[quidcumque]

Concerta xr: Ritalin is dead, long live Concerta

18 mg, first day: notably improved task initiation, focus, task switching, lack of brain fog. Not feeling jittery, even with caffeine.

We'll see over the next few days if this is a product of the meds, or of the placebo of Novelty

[quidcumque]

Adderall: Gets me a little "buzzy", makes it harder to sit still or idly veg, thus improving Task Initiation. Improvements to task initiation waned over time. Doses of 15/15 didn't improve concentration. Doses of 20/20 had me finishing projects across 18-hour sessions.

Suppresses hunger, I forget to eat. Raises heart rate and BP a little, but within acceptable levels. Wasn't allowed to do XR because of weight loss from forgetting to eat. Wouldn't consistently remember to do second dose. Feels more like "rescue" drug than maintenance for me.

[quidcumque]

Vyvanse: Very mild effects. Mostly improved Task Switching, i.e. I could work on one thing for a while, then swap out or take a break while actually feeling like I'd be able to return to the first thing afterwards. Effect waned over time. EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Got on the "I'm poor, please give for free" program for a year, but then they axed that in favor of producing a generic. Generic was EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Not worth it.

[quidcumque]

Had to fistfight my new meds gal into taking me off everything (which didn't work or DID work but with narsty side effects) so I could start fresh. No, I do not think I will be "managing my symptoms fine" off the meds. Yes, I still want to go off them TEMPORARILY. No, I am not at risk for suicidal ideation or self harm. No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before, they didn't work, that's why I'm doing all this.

Each step of the process, too ffs. Yes, I am experiencing worsening symptoms. No, I am not experiencing thoughts of suicidal ideation, homocidal ideation, psychosis, or mania. Are you trying to slap me with new diagnoses or are you just bad at describing things in less incendiary terms? No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before.

they didn't work

that's why I'm doing all this

NO I AM NOT EXPERIENCING THOUGHTS OF---

[quidcumque]

Ritalin: 10 mg: mild improvements in task initiation, focus, concentration. No noticeable side effects.

20 mg, first half-week: I AM GETTING SHIT DONE WITH NO FATIGUE. Mild concern over whether I can turn the go juice back off. Caffeine on top possibly bad idea.

20 mg, middle week: Can't sleep. Can't really concentrate, either. Less ideal.

20 mg, final half-week: I can no longer happy.

[quidcumque]

Adderall: Gets me a little "buzzy", makes it harder to sit still or idly veg, thus improving Task Initiation. Improvements to task initiation waned over time. Doses of 15/15 didn't improve concentration. Doses of 20/20 had me finishing projects across 18-hour sessions.

Suppresses hunger, I forget to eat. Raises heart rate and BP a little, but within acceptable levels. Wasn't allowed to do XR because of weight loss from forgetting to eat. Wouldn't consistently remember to do second dose. Feels more like "rescue" drug than maintenance for me.

[quidcumque]

Vyvanse: Very mild effects. Mostly improved Task Switching, i.e. I could work on one thing for a while, then swap out or take a break while actually feeling like I'd be able to return to the first thing afterwards. Effect waned over time. EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Got on the "I'm poor, please give for free" program for a year, but then they axed that in favor of producing a generic. Generic was EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Not worth it.

[quidcumque]

Had to fistfight my new meds gal into taking me off everything (which didn't work or DID work but with narsty side effects) so I could start fresh. No, I do not think I will be "managing my symptoms fine" off the meds. Yes, I still want to go off them TEMPORARILY. No, I am not at risk for suicidal ideation or self harm. No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before, they didn't work, that's why I'm doing all this.

Each step of the process, too ffs. Yes, I am experiencing worsening symptoms. No, I am not experiencing thoughts of suicidal ideation, homocidal ideation, psychosis, or mania. Are you trying to slap me with new diagnoses or are you just bad at describing things in less incendiary terms? No, I don't want to go back on the same meds as before.

they didn't work

that's why I'm doing all this

NO I AM NOT EXPERIENCING THOUGHTS OF---

[quidcumque]

Adderall: Gets me a little "buzzy", makes it harder to sit still or idly veg, thus improving Task Initiation. Improvements to task initiation waned over time. Doses of 15/15 didn't improve concentration. Doses of 20/20 had me finishing projects across 18-hour sessions.

Suppresses hunger, I forget to eat. Raises heart rate and BP a little, but within acceptable levels. Wasn't allowed to do XR because of weight loss from forgetting to eat. Wouldn't consistently remember to do second dose. Feels more like "rescue" drug than maintenance for me.

[quidcumque]

Vyvanse: Very mild effects. Mostly improved Task Switching, i.e. I could work on one thing for a while, then swap out or take a break while actually feeling like I'd be able to return to the first thing afterwards. Effect waned over time. EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Got on the "I'm poor, please give for free" program for a year, but then they axed that in favor of producing a generic. Generic was EXPENSIVE AS FUCK. Not worth it.

[quidcumque]

Adderall: Gets me a little "buzzy", makes it harder to sit still or idly veg, thus improving Task Initiation. Improvements to task initiation waned over time. Doses of 15/15 didn't improve concentration. Doses of 20/20 had me finishing projects across 18-hour sessions.

Suppresses hunger, I forget to eat. Raises heart rate and BP a little, but within acceptable levels. Wasn't allowed to do XR because of weight loss from forgetting to eat. Wouldn't consistently remember to do second dose. Feels more like "rescue" drug than maintenance for me.

[quidcumque]

Because this is where I go when I've spent WAY TOO LONG fixing something underdocumented: If you're dual-booting Linux and Windows and shit starts to go weird in Linux (specifically WiFi for me), turn off Fast Startup in Windows. That, and fully shut down when going from Windows back to Linux, don't just reboot.

In Windows:

Open Control Panel / Power Options

"Choose what the power buttons do" (might be hidden in Advanced or Other Power Options)

"Change settings that are currently unavailable"

Turn off Fast Startup

Turn computer all the way off

See if Linux is magically fixed

[redstonedust]

is there a name for the thing where people find out that a cute animal is still an animal that kills and fucks and does things that would be bad for humans to do to eachother so they start going "did you know DUCKS are EVIL?? did you know DOLPHINS will NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF GOD?? did you know your CAT is MORALLY BANKRUPT??"

[oneirophasia]

I propose "misanthropomorphism".

[metamorphesque]

John Muir, from a letter to his sister (1873)

[quidcumque]

...You seem confused, little AI article from 2023. I recognize that this was a somewhat niche topic, and you did your best to apply what you knew to the situation.

But when you're tasked with explaining How to Tame the World Turtle in ARK, we don't expect Understanding the Behaviors and Needs of World Turtles, Nutrition and Diet of World Turtle, or even Creating Enrichment Opportunities for your World Turtles.

I expect to find out if this under-documented ARK Survival Evolved mod wants me to whack the world turtle in the ankles and shove berries up its ass.

[quidcumque]

Am I having a stroke why do I smell a nursing home

[quidcumque]

Had my last (maybe ever) appointment with the meds guy I've had for five years. Feels WAY longer than that, but that's because he's seen me through my debilitating burnout, agonizingly slow recovery, and sneaky patches of increased depression / anxiety. All as we navigate treatment for the ADHD diagnosis I went to him for

Anyway yeah, misting up when he tells me I look happier than I have in years, crying a little when saying goodbye

[quidcumque]

Yes THANK you Pinterest for your confirmation of surveillance by giving me a Cain / Able pin IMMEDIATELY after the youtube video makes a casual reference. Like, can't stress how immediate. Seconds.

[quidcumque]

Unquestioned exceptions are so weird. I don't like backing into spaces, it's just never been a priority and I get the angles wrong. So I don't.

Except at my DM's place, where I do it every time. I don't think I've parked here once by pulling nose-in. Why? I think I did it the first time because most of the cars here do. After that it was just "I always park on this side of the lot, by backing in" and no further thought paid. And I still do it now that I've NOTICED that it's weird that I do it. Brains are weird

[quidcumque]

As one does, a conversation about a centaur D&D character led to the observation that in a fantasy world, a monster fucker foot fetishist could do worse than be a blacksmith.

My rejection of cobblers as "NORMIE foot fetishists" was called out on the basis that, as non-discriminatory bipedal footwear providers, they would have access to orcs, goblins, elves, changelings, gnomes, halflings, dwarves, aracokra, kobolds, and "shit tons of other shoe wearing races".

Which of course begs the taxonomical question of "monster fucking" in a high fantasy world.

[quidcumque]

How does one define "monster" in the context of sexual attraction? In our mundane world, it's anything not considered human or animal. This seems wholly insufficient however in a world with Every Option Ever. Not to mention distastefully anthro-centric. Is an elf who's attracted to another elf to be considered a monster-fucker? No.

So that could lead us to "anything not your own race (or animal)". Yet here too we find problems: different races are sometimes progenatorily compatible, as with Humans and Elves successfully hybridizing to bear Half-Elves. Is a half-elf lover to be considered "monster fucking" by either race? While "kissing cousins" is perhaps an outre topic (outside certain royal lines), would a human be a monster fucker to kiss their dear human aunt's daughter? Would the divide be so sudden and irrevocable after only one generation?

And if yes, what's the percentage? If that half-elf cousin had children with a human, those children would be 3/4 human and only 1/4 not. Monsters still? What if a few generations more?

Do we then say it's not monster-fucking if they're half-or-more of your same race? It would seem a logical solution until we compare a half-elf with a half-dragon.

[quidcumque]

If we define via blood, the percentage threshold has to exist. In Pathfinder, sorcerers with the Dragon bloodline get their power from, at SOME POINT back in their family tree, an ancestor who banged a dragon. Yet those sorcerers are only labeled as the race they "APPEAR" as, meaning that at some point in their lineage, that unequivocally "monster" blood was diluted enough to stop counting for anything other than a recessive genetic proclivity for hoarding and the occasional outbreak of arcana. So what's the cutoff point? And again, is a vanishingly small yet taxonomically relevant variation between one generation and the next to be deemed SUFFICIENT for labeling only one "monster"?

[quidcumque]

It was at this point that she fed me an AI's definition of D&D monster races, for which I called her filth and told her to fight her own battles

[quidcumque]

For serious though, I just want to know on what definition Diogenes can run in with his plucked-chicken-equivalent going "BEHOLD! A MONSTER-FUCKER!"

[quidcumque]

As one does, a conversation about a centaur D&D character led to the observation that in a fantasy world, a monster fucker foot fetishist could do worse than be a blacksmith.

My rejection of cobblers as "NORMIE foot fetishists" was called out on the basis that, as non-discriminatory bipedal footwear providers, they would have access to orcs, goblins, elves, changelings, gnomes, halflings, dwarves, aracokra, kobolds, and "shit tons of other shoe wearing races".

Which of course begs the taxonomical question of "monster fucking" in a high fantasy world.

[quidcumque]

How does one define "monster" in the context of sexual attraction? In our mundane world, it's anything not considered human or animal. This seems wholly insufficient however in a world with Every Option Ever. Not to mention distastefully anthro-centric. Is an elf who's attracted to another elf to be considered a monster-fucker? No.

So that could lead us to "anything not your own race (or animal)". Yet here too we find problems: different races are sometimes progenatorily compatible, as with Humans and Elves successfully hybridizing to bear Half-Elves. Is a half-elf lover to be considered "monster fucking" by either race? While "kissing cousins" is perhaps an outre topic (outside certain royal lines), would a human be a monster fucker to kiss their dear human aunt's daughter? Would the divide be so sudden and irrevocable after only one generation?

And if yes, what's the percentage? If that half-elf cousin had children with a human, those children would be 3/4 human and only 1/4 not. Monsters still? What if a few generations more?

Do we then say it's not monster-fucking if they're half-or-more of your same race? It would seem a logical solution until we compare a half-elf with a half-dragon.

[quidcumque]

If we define via blood, the percentage threshold has to exist. In Pathfinder, sorcerers with the Dragon bloodline get their power from, at SOME POINT back in their family tree, an ancestor who banged a dragon. Yet those sorcerers are only labeled as the race they "APPEAR" as, meaning that at some point in their lineage, that unequivocally "monster" blood was diluted enough to stop counting for anything other than a recessive genetic proclivity for hoarding and the occasional outbreak of arcana. So what's the cutoff point? And again, is a vanishingly small yet taxonomically relevant variation between one generation and the next to be deemed SUFFICIENT for labeling only one "monster"?

[quidcumque]

It was at this point that she fed me an AI's definition of D&D monster races, for which I called her filth and told her to fight her own battles

[quidcumque]

As one does, a conversation about a centaur D&D character led to the observation that in a fantasy world, a monster fucker foot fetishist could do worse than be a blacksmith.

My rejection of cobblers as "NORMIE foot fetishists" was called out on the basis that, as non-discriminatory bipedal footwear providers, they would have access to orcs, goblins, elves, changelings, gnomes, halflings, dwarves, aracokra, kobolds, and "shit tons of other shoe wearing races".

Which of course begs the taxonomical question of "monster fucking" in a high fantasy world.

[quidcumque]

How does one define "monster" in the context of sexual attraction? In our mundane world, it's anything not considered human or animal. This seems wholly insufficient however in a world with Every Option Ever. Not to mention distastefully anthro-centric. Is an elf who's attracted to another elf to be considered a monster-fucker? No.

So that could lead us to "anything not your own race (or animal)". Yet here too we find problems: different races are sometimes progenatorily compatible, as with Humans and Elves successfully hybridizing to bear Half-Elves. Is a half-elf lover to be considered "monster fucking" by either race? While "kissing cousins" is perhaps an outre topic (outside certain royal lines), would a human be a monster fucker to kiss their dear human aunt's daughter? Would the divide be so sudden and irrevocable after only one generation?

And if yes, what's the percentage? If that half-elf cousin had children with a human, those children would be 3/4 human and only 1/4 not. Monsters still? What if a few generations more?

Do we then say it's not monster-fucking if they're half-or-more of your same race? It would seem a logical solution until we compare a half-elf with a half-dragon.

[quidcumque]

If we define via blood, the percentage threshold has to exist. In Pathfinder, sorcerers with the Dragon bloodline get their power from, at SOME POINT back in their family tree, an ancestor who banged a dragon. Yet those sorcerers are only labeled as the race they "APPEAR" as, meaning that at some point in their lineage, that unequivocally "monster" blood was diluted enough to stop counting for anything other than a recessive genetic proclivity for hoarding and the occasional outbreak of arcana. So what's the cutoff point? And again, is a vanishingly small yet taxonomically relevant variation between one generation and the next to be deemed SUFFICIENT for labeling only one "monster"?

[quidcumque]

As one does, a conversation about a centaur D&D character led to the observation that in a fantasy world, a monster fucker foot fetishist could do worse than be a blacksmith.

My rejection of cobblers as "NORMIE foot fetishists" was called out on the basis that, as non-discriminatory bipedal footwear providers, they would have access to orcs, goblins, elves, changelings, gnomes, halflings, dwarves, aracokra, kobolds, and "shit tons of other shoe wearing races".

Which of course begs the taxonomical question of "monster fucking" in a high fantasy world.

[quidcumque]

How does one define "monster" in the context of sexual attraction? In our mundane world, it's anything not considered human or animal. This seems wholly insufficient however in a world with Every Option Ever. Not to mention distastefully anthro-centric. Is an elf who's attracted to another elf to be considered a monster-fucker? No.

So that could lead us to "anything not your own race (or animal)". Yet here too we find problems: different races are sometimes progenatorily compatible, as with Humans and Elves successfully hybridizing to bear Half-Elves. Is a half-elf lover to be considered "monster fucking" by either race? While "kissing cousins" is perhaps an outre topic (outside certain royal lines), would a human be a monster fucker to kiss their dear human aunt's daughter? Would the divide be so sudden and irrevocable after only one generation?

And if yes, what's the percentage? If that half-elf cousin had children with a human, those children would be 3/4 human and only 1/4 not. Monsters still? What if a few generations more?

Do we then say it's not monster-fucking if they're half-or-more of your same race? It would seem a logical solution until we compare a half-elf with a half-dragon.