There is no destination, there is only the journey

33, Male. Upstate NY, T1D, Metalhead, Starwars Nerd, Progressive, psytrance. just here to vent frustrations. formerly #thegenuinepulse, "the sun taunts you in everything you do, like a substance that works for everyone else but has no effect on you." any questions just ask.

[quint3ss3nce]

Way too drunk to talk to people. What have I done??? Mistakes were made...

[noxsera]

[quint3ss3nce]

Hard to picture a future, when every day is a life or death situation. Id be surprised if I make it to 40 let alone retirement.

[quint3ss3nce]

[quint3ss3nce]

Oh lawrd 3 hours of sleep. Can my mind just shut off? Fuck. Hope people enjoy their packages delivered by a depressed slow moving insomniac

[quint3ss3nce]

[quint3ss3nce]

At least going through 14 years of my life photo style I was able to find pictures of me looking good. Makes it at least understandable how I ended up here. I was hot then as soon as I got diagnosed with a disease that makes my default everyday dying, that all fell away. Gotta love taking care of someone and waiting on their every need because they have a chronic illness(I was basically a glorified butler by the end) only to be cheated on and thrown aside when you develop one of your own completely, out of your control. And then wonder why I feel less than human. Can I just die already?

[quint3ss3nce]

[quint3ss3nce]

Made a complete fool of myself because my phone had a mind of it own. Made me feel so ashamed and anxious I proceeded to drink way too much. And now I have to be up for work in 4 hours but instead decided the best option was going through 14 years of Google pictures and deleting that entire part of my life. Emotional roller coaster to say the least....can I just die now? Fuck im so tired and done with this life. Just end it.

[quint3ss3nce]

Wow.........I looked pretty good 13 years ago pre chronic illness and emotional fuckery

[quint3ss3nce]

Pretty sure ill be alone the rest of my life. After being married and then cheated on and dumped after 13 years im just over it. Been out of the dating game too long and I have no clue how to "hit on" a girl not to mention im not for the games to begin with. It's been too long I only know how to be a husband at this point and apparently i failed at that so.......forever alone I guess. Is what it is.

[quint3ss3nce]

[quint3ss3nce]

"You can't trust me not to beg,

And not to sleep around.

And if you dont expect too much from me,

You might not be let down."

[quint3ss3nce]

[etoile-noirre]

you and those fucking eyes.

[quint3ss3nce]

When you had a horrific high blood sugar episode yesterday and was very close to dka and just felt so rough and alone all day. Noone checks in or really seems to care about me or my chronic illness. but then alas the one person you wish would check on you does. Made my day. Means more than she knows. It nice to not feel completely hopeless and alone

[quint3ss3nce]