i fucking hate myself

vent blog of @f1shfo0d

[r0ttenf1sh]

stop making me more self-conscious about my fucking hair

its just the way it is

please stop calling me that

youre making me want to rip out my hair and shred it into a fucking monstrosity

how unique do you want it to be

just for you to stop calling me that

its ok though

im not even proud of my own hair

its ugly anyways

no matter how many times i fix it and make it look as good as possible just because im a fucking perfectionist and that im already so self-conscious about my own looks anyways

DEAR FUCKING GOD WHY AM I SAYING THIS I FUCKING HATE MYSELF

[r0ttenf1sh]

why am i so fucking stressed

i genuinely want to punch the wall and bang my head into the fucking wall as well

[r0ttenf1sh]

theres no way my cuts still itch even after its already healed

[r0ttenf1sh]

i hate my boobs bro i wish i could get fucking top surgery the moment i become a fully grown adult ughh

[r0ttenf1sh]

i hatee being a fucking woman bro

[r0ttenf1sh]

self-consciousness

ok i should stop complaining

im sorry

im so annoying

[r0ttenf1sh]

and dont even try to call me pretty or handsome just to make me feel better

i will think its all on purpose

IM SORRYR WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WIJT ME I FUCKING HATE MYSELF

[r0ttenf1sh]

self-consciousness

ok i should stop complaining

im sorry

im so annoying

[r0ttenf1sh]

WHAT is WRONG with me its just ONE word no need to be so bitchy about it UGHHHHHH I FUCKING HATE MYSELF IM SO FUCKING SENSITIVE

[r0ttenf1sh]

why am i crying

after just one little word

im unique

why that

im unique in my own way, there’s no such thing for you to call me that

i know im sensitive and annoying its ok

but just know im unique ok

i cant just take sudden criticism like that you know

i’ll tear up and cry like the pathetic bitch i am

even when it looks like im just chill about it im just actually keeping it in until its over

why am i so sensitive

please dont call me that

im unique

everyone’s unique

im just being who i want to be

you shouldve said something else like “common”, not that

i feel like you actually mean it

you actually made me more self-conscious about myself

im sorry

[r0ttenf1sh]

how to stop thinking about suggestive things all the time.com

[r0ttenf1sh]

dude genuinely how

[r0ttenf1sh]

how to stop thinking about suggestive things all the time.com

[r0ttenf1sh]

"im not a girl"

i say with a feminine voice

i say with long hair

i say with a slightly feminine style

i say knowing that's all i'll ever be

i wish i wasnt a girl

[r0ttenf1sh]

" but aeeshaaa you always look like a girll "

ok man shut the fuck up its ok if you dont know me well and accidentally call me a girl but if we know each other well PLEASE dont refer to me as a female/girl/woman unless youre using it as slang.

im really really sorry if i seem upset im just fed up already of questioning myself all fucking day long

its ok if you use she/her on me, i use any pronouns and present feminine sometimes anyway. but i do prefer he/they

[r0ttenf1sh]

I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL

SHUT THE FUCK UP

[r0ttenf1sh]

stop calling me a woman oh my fucking god

[r0ttenf1sh]

oh well there goes my 5 month clean streak

i hate myself

[r0ttenf1sh]

oh wait i broke my cleanliness streak

oh shit oh fuck