Rachel ✨️ She/Her ✨️ Older than I feel and look ✨️ Avid fanfic reader ✨️ I have 2 degrees in media & am working on my PhD in English, focused on Rhetoric & Composition. ✨️ Massive fangirl ✨️ Addicted to conventions ✨️ Fangirl of: Shadow & Bone, Cursed, SPN, TVD & TO, TW, TB, Sherlock, LOTR/Hobbit, Harry Potter, Twilight, The Hunger Games, The Avengers, Criminal Minds ✨️ My top loves are Ben Barnes and Daniel Sharman, but I love a lot of actors.
Guys….i have to say it….i was wrong trying to get you all to vote for Kamala all these months and not President Trump who was saved by God….President Trump just exposed something inhumane about her!! That witch wants to give us HEALTHCARE!! 😂
How communist of her! It’s not like Doctor and Dental Care is expensive as shit! No let’s vote in the reincarnation of Jesus Christ himself President Trump who wants to make it to where votes will no longer matter and it’ll all be fixed for us after four years!!
Guys….i have to say it….i was wrong trying to get you all to vote for Kamala all these months and not President Trump who was saved by God….President Trump just exposed something inhumane about her!! That witch wants to give us HEALTHCARE!! 😂
How communist of her! It’s not like Doctor and Dental Care is expensive as shit! No let’s vote in the reincarnation of Jesus Christ himself President Trump who wants to make it to where votes will no longer matter and it’ll all be fixed for us after four years!!
THAT FIRST SITE IS EVERY WRITER’S DREAM DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I’VE TRIED WRITING SOMETHING AND THOUGHT GOD DAMN IS THERE A SPECIFIC WORD FOR WHAT I’M USING TWO SENTENCES TO DESCRIBE AND JUST GETTING A BUNCH OF SHIT GOOGLE RESULTS
Plot summary : Desperate to get away from your controlling family, you take a job in New York as a wealthy vampire's blood source. A million dollars awaits if you can make it through a year, but life with Billy Russo is not going to be as simple as you think.
Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader
Story Rating : R
Chapter Rating : R
Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Violence. A lot more violence than usual. All chapters will contain mentions of blood. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story.
Word Count : 5.6k
A/N : I'm not crying, you're crying 😭
CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO | CHAPTER THREE | CHAPTER FOUR | CHAPTER FIVE | CHAPTER SIX | CHAPTER SEVEN | CHAPTER EIGHT | CHAPTER NINE | CHAPTER TEN | CHAPTER ELEVEN | CHAPTER TWELVE | CHAPTER THIRTEEN | CHAPTER FOURTEEN | CHAPTER FIFTEEN | CHAPTER SIXTEEN | CHAPTER SEVENTEEN | CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
MASTER LIST
Chapter Nineteen
There was a light at the end of the nothingness that you were fighting so desperately to get to. It got brighter and brighter the closer you got, causing your head to hurt and your eyes to strain. Turning away from the light, you felt something soft against your face, something that smelled like... laundry detergent?
The realisation that you were still alive came slowly, scratching away in the back of your mind as you struggled to open your eyes and force yourself awake. The dream wanted to hold you a little longer and almost managed to pull you back under, but the light was so bright.
A pained murmur escaped you as your eyes finally opened, straining against the midday sun pouring through the windows. You squinted, struggling to focus tired eyes on anything. Your head was pounding but, soon enough, familiarity started to stir inside you.
You knew where you were.
You were in your room. In your bed.
In Billy’s penthouse.
(You were home.)
You tried to sit up, but you were too tired, too weak to do anything more than lift your head. That’s when you realised he was right there at your side, his head buried in his folded arms at the edge of your bed, Bill the Beagle beside him. You tried to think back, tried to remember what had happened, but everything felt like a blur, like it had all just been some horrible nightmare.
All you could really remember was wanting to be with Billy.
“Billy?” Your voice was a hoarse whisper, your throat aching and straining.
Your neck - you’d been hurt, hadn’t you? You reached for your throat and felt the edge of your bandages, but you didn’t have time to think more about it, not when Billy finally lifted his head and looked at you.
For a few seconds, he just stared, the dark circles under his eyes betraying the fact that he’d been at your side for a long time.
How long had he been there?
How long had you been there?
“You’re awake,” he muttered in disbelief as he took your hand in his, gripping tight. “I thought - I thought I’d lost you...”
All you could think to do was squeeze his hand, not sure what you could say to make him feel better because you couldn’t remember. You had no idea what he’d been through.
“Wh-what happened?” You managed to ask, and watched, again, as he fell silent and stared at you uncomfortably.
“Drake, he -” he started and stopped, his gaze dropping, “- we came to save you.”
He’d rescued you.
Despite everything you’d done and the pain you must have caused him, Billy had risked his life to come save you. He hadn’t given up on you.
“How long have I been back?” You asked. “How long was I sleeping?”
“Three days.”
There was something else, something he wasn’t telling you, something that had shame etched across his features, but it was hard to focus, hard to think about anything beyond the fact that you were safe and you were with him again.
“I don’t feel right...” you muttered, closing your eyes again for a few long seconds.
“I know, hummingbird,” he said tenderly, brushing his thumb across the back of your hand. “I know, but it’ll get better, I promise. You just need to rest.”
You didn’t know what any of that meant. You didn’t know what it was but, again, you were too exhausted to think straight, too out of it to fully grasp the situation. Billy reached for you with his free hand, softly stroking your hair, trying to lull you back to sleep before you could even think to ask any questions.
But you felt cold and uncomfortable despite the thick blanket on top of you. More than that, you felt starved for comfort.
You felt awful and all you wanted was a hug.
“Billy?” You asked, fighting against sleep.
“Yes?” He answered, his hand slipping from your hair to your cheek.
“Can you hold me? Just for a little while?”
“Of course,” he said, his voice breaking just a little, “I’ll hold you as long as you want me to.”
You managed a weak smile as Billy pulled back the covers and climbed into bed. He laid beside you and let you snuggle closer, getting yourself comfortable before wrapping his arms around you. Resting your head on his chest, you let out a contented sigh as he started to stroke your hair again.
For a few moments you were silent, thinking back to the last time he’d held you; how you’d both been so happy, so content. And you’d ruined it.
“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, burying your face against his sweater.
“Oh, hummingbird, whatever for?” He asked, sounding like his heart was breaking.
“For always causing you so many problems,” you answered with a sniffle, pressing closer to him, suddenly worried he might pull away.
His arms tightened around you and you felt his lips press against the top of your head.
“You never cause me problems, hummingbird,” he told you firmly, though his voice still sounded broken and strained. “I’d go to hell and back for you, to keep you safe, and it’d never be a problem for me because I - I love you. I love you so much.”
A tear rolled down your cheek and you felt so overwhelmed that you didn’t know what to do with yourself. You felt safe, loved, but more exhausted than you’d ever been. It felt like all of this was just some wonderful dream that would be snatched away from you the moment you dared to look away, and you just couldn’t stop crying.
“I’m so tired, Billy,” you told him, tears falling more freely, soaking into the fabric of his red sweater.
“I know. I’m so sorry about that but I promise you’ll feel better soon. You just need to rest, okay?” He told you gently, pressing another kiss to the top of your head.
“Will you stay with me?”
“Always,” he answered and you had no idea just how much he meant it.
Despite your tears, it wasn’t long before your exhaustion won out and you drifted off but, true to his word, Billy stayed with you, holding you tight as you slept.
------------
As he laid with you, Billy couldn’t help but think back to that night, to the hotel, to the moment leading up to finding you on the floor with your throat torn.
The elevator ride felt like it took a lifetime, like every second was time you didn’t have, and the longer it took, the more afraid he felt. He couldn’t stay still, he was practically vibrating with rage, eager to get to the prick that had tried to take you from him, eager to snuff out his miserable existence. He could see Madani out of the corner of his eye, watching him as he tried not to crawl out of his own skin.
Frank stood on his other side, completely stoic and prepared for what was to come, but Billy knew better than to think his friend was unaware what was going on. He’d seen Billy like this before, he knew just how tenuous his self-control really was.
Madani checked her gun and Frank did likewise. Billy left his holstered, instead gripping a knife. That was all he needed; this was personal and he wanted it to hurt.
The elevator let out a ding before the doors slid open.
The first goon didn’t even have a chance to unholster his sidearm before Frank dropped him.
Billy looked at Madani; “go find her, we’ll deal with Drake.”
She paused but only for a split-second before nodding and starting to move into the penthouse suite, disappearing into one of the bedrooms, while Frank and Billy pressed on to the living area.
Another goon popped out and met a quick end with Billy’s knife in his throat. There was no telling how many of them were squirrelled away in the suite, but Billy was going to relish finding out.
Everything became a blur the moment he first set eyes on Justin Drake. He looked at Billy with a hint of familiarity, like he’d done his research, and grinned. His face was painted dark red with blood, and Billy knew immediately that he’d hurt you, though he wouldn’t allow himself to even contemplate that you might be dead.
“What a pleasant surprise,” Drake remarked. “But I’m afraid you’re late to the party.”
At Billy’s side, Frank had another goon by the neck, pummelling him with the butt of his gun. Billy’s fingers tightened their grip on the knife and things started to get hazy.
He cleared the distance, trading blows with Drake. At some point they’d ended up on the floor, ripping and tearing at each other, both trying to gain the upper hand. His knife ended up in Drake’s thigh, while Drake’s fangs tore into Billy’s shoulder.
Billy felt himself slipping, giving in to the rage that was so desperate to escape, the anger inside of him that wanted nothing more than to punish the piece of shit that had hurt you.
As they rolled and tussled, Drake pressed a thumb against Billy’s eye, his other hand at Billy’s throat.Billy lashed out, swinging punches and tearing his fangs through Drake’s arm until he managed to retrieve the knife from Drake’s thigh.
Before he had time to register what had happened and what he’d done, Billy was on top of Drake’s lifeless body, his throat cut in a way that even a vampire couldn’t recover from. His hands and clothes were slick with blood and viscera. But there was no time to think about what he’d done, not once he heard Madani’s shouts and felt Frank’s hand on his shoulder, pulling him back to the moment.
He needed to get to you.
Scrambling to his feet, he almost fell as he made his way to the source of the shouting; to you and Madani on the floor in a puddle of your blood.
Despite Madani’s reassurances that help was on the way, he knew it was already too late.
His breath caught as you looked up at him, his hand quickly grasping yours.
“B-Billy,” you choked out, “you’re h-here...”
He squeezed your hand, already knowing that he couldn’t let go, that he’d never let go. He didn’t even try to hold back the tears that were starting to well in the corners of his eyes.
“I told you,” he muttered, feeling like his heart was breaking in two, “I’ll never let you go.”
And he wouldn’t. Not now, not ever.
You tried to mutter an apology, but your voice came out so weak and small, your life slowly slipping away from you.
Panic and dread started to fill his chest, knowing that the end was getting closer.
“Dont. Don’t try to talk. Just - just stay still, stay with me, it’s going to be alright.” His eyes never left yours as he spoke, wanting so desperately for you to know that he was there and that nothing bad was going to happen to you. He wasn’t going to lose you.
“I l-love -”
“Hey - hey, hummingbird, keep your eyes on me. It’s going to be okay,” but he could see you slipping, he could see that last spark of life in your eyes dimming.
He knew he needed to do something, that he couldn’t just let you die, but there was only one option and Billy knew it was the one thing you didn’t want. Billy only had a second to think about it, he couldn’t waste any more time than that - he’d rather you hate him forever than lose you completely.
“I’m sorry,” he told you, voice fraught and broken. “I love you and - and I’m sorry. I know you’re going to hate me but...” he fell silent for a moment but there was no response. You were still breathing but only just. There wasn’t much time left.
He shouted for Frank.
“You gotta turn her,” he begged, pleading with his friend.
“Bill she don’t want -”
“You think she wants to die?” He snapped. There was another beat of silence and it looked like Frank wasn’t going to back down. His stomach threatened to turn itself inside out. He couldn’t take no for an answer. “If you don’t do it, I will.”
“You’d infect her?” Frank asked angrily. “Make her like you?”
“If it means keeping her alive,” Billy answered back.
“She wouldn’t be alive, not like she knows it. I -”
“What would you do if it was Karen?” He asked, watching as anger flashed across Frank’s face just at the mere thought of anyone hurting Karen this way.
“You love her that much?”
“I can’t live without her,” he answered, tears still rolling down his cheeks. “I won’t live without her.”
You were barely even there anymore when Frank moved to your side and looked down at you, a silent apology in his eyes as he leaned down and sunk his teeth into you.
Then, they’d brought you home and tended to your wounds, hoping that the bite would take and that you’d turn.
Billy had sat by yours side the whole time, barely moving, only daring to close his eyes for an hour or so at a time. And, since that moment, he’d felt like there was an invisible countdown, a clock slowly ticking down to the moment when you realised what had been done to you.
The moment you would start to hate him.
------------
It was dark when your eyes opened again. A whole day and a half had slipped by unnoticed but to you it felt like only a few hours had passed. You felt sharper - still tired and cold, but you finally felt like you could think straight. You finally felt like you could fill in some of the blanks and figure out what was going on.
Billy was still with you, still holding you. When you slowly lifted your head from his chest, you realised he was asleep and, while you had so many questions, the last thing you wanted to do was wake him. He’d been so tired earlier, he’d looked as bad as you’d felt and just as overwhelmed. He needed rest.
Lifting a hand to your neck, you realised that not only were the bandages gone, but so was the cast from your arm. Your throat felt normal, not even tender where you’d been bitten. It was almost like it had never even happened.
But how could that be?
How long had you been recovering?
More to the point, was it even possible to recover from a wound like the one Drake had inflicted?
You tried to remember that night, tried to think back, but all that remained were a collection of fuzzy memories; Drake trying to get you to leave, Madani appearing at your side, Billy holding your hand, and Frank -
Moving suddenly, you pulled away from Billy’s arms and scrambled out of bed. Your legs felt weak and unstable, like you hadn’t used them in days (because you hadn’t).
The more questions you had, the more the pieces started to fall into place. You’d been hurt, badly, so badly that there shouldn’t have been any coming back from it. And, now, Billy was in your room - how was he in your room?
You wanted so desperately to find another conclusion, something better than the one you were stuck with, but the more you thought about it, the more you came to realise that there was only one thing that made a damned bit of sense.
He’d turned you.
You were a vampire.
“Hummingbird?” Your eyes snapped to him as he spoke, seeing the worry etched on his face despite the darkness. “Are you -”
“Tell me you didn’t...” you pleaded in a low but desperate whisper, torn between anger and sorrow.
His expression became one of shame as he slowly got out of bed and took a step towards you.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice breaking, “I’m so sorry.”
“Why?” You demanded. “Why would you -”
“Because I couldn’t lose you,” he answered, daring to take another step towards you. “Because I love you and I could bear to lose you like that.”
As he reached for you, you took a step back, his fingers ghosting your hand as you pulled out of reach, and you could see the hurt in his eyes as you did. But, regardless of whatever was going on in his head, Billy gave you the space you so obviously needed and fell silent, letting you process what was going on.
“Tell me what happened,” you finally asked, trying so hard to hold back tears.
Billy let out a slow exhale and let his gaze drift towards the window. It took him a moment to start but, once he did, he didn’t stop until he’d told the whole story, leaving out no detail. It didn’t help. Not one bit. In fact, knowing what he’d been through to rescue you only seemed to make it worse.
“Please say something,” he gently prompted after a minute passed in silence. “Even if it’s just to tell me that you hate me...”
The problem was that you didn’t know what you wanted to say because you didn’t understand how you really felt. You were angry - so fucking angry - that he’d turned you, despite know it was something you never wanted, but you could also remember how scared you’d been, how you’d wanted nothing more than to just be able to be with him again.
Now Drake was gone and you didn’t have to worry about Billy losing you to age or illness; every obstacle that had been in your way was gone now and, if you wanted to, you could be with Billy.
But there was something else, a thought you couldn’t escape.
“You turned me into something you hate,” you finally said.
He’d been clear from the start, hadn’t he? Billy didn’t like vampires.
“No, that’s not -” he shook his head as he struggled to find the right words, “- could never hate you.”
“You hate vampires, you hate being a vampire.”
“No, I - maybe I did, but I don’t anymore. What was it you said to me?” You trailed off, trying to remember the exact words. “You were glad that Frank turned me, you were happy that I’m a vampire because, if I wasn’t, we never would have met And that - that made me glad to be a vampire.”
You stayed silent, only shaking your head in response.
“My sickness, the way I was infected, and the way it’s led to me hurting so many people - that’s what I hate,” he tried again, “but you don’t have to deal with that.”
“I can’t give you blood. You don’t need me anymore.”
“Hummingbird -”
You reached for him suddenly, taking his hand and pressing it to your chest, above your heart; a heart that no longer raced for him.
“I can’t even be that anymore,” you told him, unable to stop a tear from rolling down your cheek. “I’m nothing... I’m worthless to you.”
“No, you’re wrong. You could never be nothing to me. You are my little hummingbird. And I love you; I loved you as a human and I’ll love you as a vampire,” Billy told you, his voice turning firmer, more certain, almost like he was angry that you didn’t believe him. “I know you didn’t want this, but I couldn’t live in a world that doesn’t have you in it.”
He kept his hand on your chest until you turned away from him.
“Can you leave me alone?” You asked softly, needing some time to unpack everything that had happened.
“Please, don’t shut me out, humming -”
“Please, Billy?” You begged, still trying to hold back your tears until he was gone. “I just need to be on my own for a little while.”
There was silence, for a few seconds before he finally relented. “Okay, but I’ll be out in the penthouse, in our spot, waiting until you’re ready to talk. However long it takes...”
And, then, he was gone.
Hours passed as you tried to wrap your head around it and tried to understand how you really felt and, eventually, you realised what it was; you’d never wanted to be a vampire because the prospect of living forever terrified you, the idea of spending an eternity feeling like you didn’t belong, feeling unloved...
But that wasn’t how things were now. That wasn’t your life anymore. You weren’t just living how your parents wanted you to live, you weren’t just following rules and only ever doing what you were told. You did belong here and if you were certain of anything it was that Billy did love you.
(Still, what was to say he’d still feel the same about you in fifty years time?)
Eventually there was a light knock on the door and, before you could think to say anything, it opened.
Karen looked at you with what could only be described as absolute relief on her face and you quickly moved across the room to greet her, throwing your arms around her. She held you tight, muttering about how glad she was that you were alright, that you were safe.
“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she said, “we’ve all been so worried.”
“I’m sorry, I never meant to -”
“You don’t have anything to apologise for. We’re all just glad you’re safe,” Karen told you firmly. “After the first couple of days we started to worry you might never wake up, but Billy stayed by your side the whole time.”
“The whole time?”
“For days - we couldn’t even get him to leave to sleep,” she explained and the thought alone caused your chest to ache.
He’d been with you the whole time, watching over you for days, not sure if you’d ever wake up. And the moment you had woken up, you’d sent him away. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how it must have felt to him, how much it must have hurt him.
You held her for a few moments more until you realised that, under the sound of her voice, you could hear the steady thrum of her heart. Pulling away, you took a step back, making some space between you as a pang of hunger caused your stomach to cramp.
“I brought you somethin’ for that,” Frank said, as if he’d read your mind.
You hadn’t even realised he was there, you’d been so focused on Karen.
He held out a glass to you and you immediately felt sick. Blood. He’d brought you blood. You didn’t dare ask where from, though you quickly found yourself wondering if it was Karen’s. When you didn’t take it, Frank turned his attention to Karen, asking for a moment alone with you. And, when she left, the sound of her heartbeat went with her, allowing you to focus on Frank.
“Look, I -” he sighed, “- I know you didn’t want this life an’ I’m sorry that this is what it took to save you.”
“Why did you do it?”
“‘cause I’ve never seen Bill care about somethin’ the way he cares about you,” Frank answered. “losin’ you would’ve destroyed him. He told me that he wouldn’t live without you.”
Wouldn’t. Not couldn’t.
“He said that?”
The thought alone was enough to turn your stomach, that he’d do something so extreme, that he thought his life wouldn’t be worth living without you. And,deep down, you started to realise that you felt the same, that a life without Billy wouldn’t be worth living.
Frank nodded. “I know it ain’t my business, but he did what he thought was right. He didn’t think you deserved to die on some hotel room floor, bleedin’ out and terrified. An’ I know all this is gonna be a big adjustment for you, but we’re all here for you an’ we’re gonna help you through it.”
You offered up a slight nod of your own before reaching out to finally take the glass from him. Lifting it to your nose, you took a sniff, shocked to find that beneath the expected coppery tang, there was a hint of sweetness.
Turning away from Frank, you dared to take your first sip, your body instinctively reacting and gagging.
“‘s okay, that happens the first time,” he offered more gently than you’d ever heard him speak.
You took a breath before trying again, taking another slow sip. It went down easier and, almost instantly, you started to feel a little bit better. The hunger pains started to lessen and subside the more you drank and the ache in the back of your head seemed less intense.
When you’d drained the glass, you wiped your lips on the back of your hand before turning to face Frank again.
“Where is he?” You asked, even though you were certain you knew the answer already. He’d be exactly where he said he would be.
“He’s out there, talkin’ to Madani,” he answered but didn’t offer any more than that before reaching into his pocket and pulling out your phone. You watched as he placed it down on your desk. “You’ve got friends here, whenever you need us.”
Frank left it at that, leaving the room. Karen poked her head around the door and said her goodbyes, telling you that she’d take you out to Josie’s with Matt and Foggy as soon as you were feeling up to it. Then you were left alone again.
You let a few minutes pass before deciding to go find Billy, but the moment you reached the adjoining door between your rooms and the penthouse, you froze.
Billy and Madani’s voices were easy to make out and you couldn’t help but listen in.
“Given the amount of evidence that was found in the hotel room and on Drake’s phone, connecting him and his associates to several high-ranking members of congress and the State Department, Homeland are less concerned about how he died and more bothered about cleaning up the massive mess that’s just landed on their laps,” Madani was explaining.
“So, they don’t care that me and Frank were there?” Billy asked.
“They’re not happy about it and, from now on, I think they’ll be paying close attention to you and Castle but, for now, they’re not interested in pursuing charges,” she explained, and you let out a soft sigh of relief.
There was a moment of silence before Madani spoke again.
“I should also tell you that we recovered the body of Mary Poots. Krista Dumont offered up a full confession after speaking to Layla El-Faouly -”
“You found Layla?” Billy asked.
“She found us when she heard we’d taken Dumont into custody,” Krista explained, “she wanted to make sure we understood that neither you nor she had anything to do with Dumont’s crimes. She also made it very clear that she had asked you to turn her.”
“So...” he started, letting that one little word hang in the air for a few seconds, “that answers all of your questions, doesn’t it? All the women you think I murdered have been accounted for.”
“That’s right,” Madani answered, “but I’m going to have to ask that you don’t leave town, we might have more questions as the case progresses.”
At that moment, you decided that you’d eavesdropped enough and quietly slipped through the door. Billy noticed you as Madani got to her feet, and her gaze soon followed his. Before Billy could say or do anything to stop her, Madani was making her way towards you, eyeing you in a way that made you feel like a monster. Like a vampire.
“I know you didn’t want this,” she said, not bothering to lower her voice so Billy couldn’t hear. “I can keep you safe if you want to press charges, if you want to go on record about everything that’s happened here. You don’t have to -”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you told her, earning a look of annoyance from Madani.
“I was there, I saw -”
“You saw Billy and Frank saving my life.”
“If that’s the story you want to stick with, fine, but I can’t protect you anymore after I leave here.”
“I don’t need protection,” you said, your eyes flashing to Billy for a moment, “I’m perfectly safe here, but there is someone who does need your protection.”
“Who?”
“My sister, Irene. Drake found her, he had pictures of her and her kids, he threatened them and I don’t know if anyone else in the Maggia knows about them,” you explained. “I don’t know if they’re going to go after her as revenge for Drake.”
“Okay, I can look into that for you,” Madani told you. “Now, are you sure that this is where you want to stay.”
“Yes.”
All Madani gave in response was a shake of her head and the slightest of shrugs before heading to the elevator. You watched as she left, keeping your eyes on her, even though you could almost feel Billy’s gaze burning into the back of your head. Even when she was gone and the elevator doors were shut behind her, you kept your back to him, still feeling a mess of emotions that you didn’t know how to untangle.
“Hummingbird?” He said softly.
Finally, you took a breath and turned to face him.
“You didn’t have to do that,” he said, “you didn’t have to protect us...”
“Yes I did.”
He didn’t move, though you could tell that the distance was killing him. He was giving you space, he was respecting your wishes. He was reminding you that you always had a choice when you were with him.
Slowly you made your way towards him, watching as he stayed perfectly still, letting you decide how close you wanted to be. You stopped in front of your usual spot on the sofa, letting your gaze shift towards the window, noticing the colour of the sky; sunrise.
“Will you sit and watch the sunrise with me?” You asked, keeping your eyes on the window as you sat.
“Of course,” Billy uttered softly, taking a seat beside you, but still giving you some space.
The view wasn’t as spectacular as sunset, the window was facing the wrong direction to really appreciate it, but it was still something new, something you hadn’t shared with him before. The sky seemed to glow with pinks and oranges that slowly gave way to blues over the New York skyline. It was beautiful.
You reached for his hand, lacing your fingers with his, but you didn’t dare look away from the window.
“I’m sorry I stole this from you,” he whispered after minutes had passed in silence. “I’m sorry that you’ll never get to experience this for real again.”
It took a few seconds for you to find your voice, for you to decide how you wanted to respond.
“I wouldn’t be experiencing this at all if it wasn’t for you,” you answered, squeezing his hand. “Missing out on sunrises and sunsets isn’t why I didn’t want to be a vampire.” You paused, letting out a sigh, still watching the sky. “My whole life, I just felt like I was existing, that everything I did was to make other people happy. I didn’t want to live forever because I didn’t want to do that forever...”
“And now?” He dared to ask.
“I want to be happy, here with you. I want to stay with you.”
“Why does it sound like there’s a but coming?”
“But I need more than this,” you explained. “I need a life of my own. I need to be able to make my own choices; go out when I want, find a job, do something that’s just for me. I think after everything, I deserve to be able to live on my own terms.”
His hand found your cheek, urging you to look at him, to see the conflicting emotions on his face.
“I want that for you too, hummingbird,” he told you. “I want you to have the life that you want, a life that makes you happy, even if... even if you don’t want me in it.”
His gaze dropped and your heart ached, untangling your hand from his, you reached for him, taking his face in your hands and forcing him to look at you, just as he’d done to you a moment earlier.
“Of course I want you in my life, Billy,” you told him. “It just can’t be like it has been. If I’m staying here, it needs to be as your equal; no more games, no more arguments, no more pushing me away to protect me. I love you Billy, but I can’t go back to that.”
“I promise,” he told you. “Whatever you need. I’ll do anything just - please give me one more chance. It’ll be different now. I’ll be different.”
You blinked back tears as you closed the distance and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips.
“I love you,” he whispered as his arms wrapped around you. “Always.”
“Promise?”
“I promise,” he muttered against your lips, his thumbs tenderly wiping away the tears that had managed to escape you. “For as long as you want me, I’ll love you.”
“I’ll always want you, Billy,” you told him, smiling softly before kissing him again. “I’ll always love you.”
End Note : 😭😭😭 I am going to do an epilogue because this chapter felt a little bittersweet, but at the same time I wanted to end it that way because if felt like an appropriately gothic inspired romance ending. But, I've left a few loose ends so that I can always return to do a second series with Billy and this reader character. Whether you've followed this from the start or only just found it, thank you so much for taking the time to read it, I really enjoyed writing this fic and I hope you enjoyed reading it.
As ever, thank you so much for your support/reading/liking/reblogging/screaming at me in the comments, it's always appreciated! Have a great weekend!!
ALSO as I mentioned in one of my previous posts, I have an omegaverse Bucky Barnes fic in the works, the first chapter will be posted on Sunday. Otherwise, I'm going to post the epilogue to this next Friday then take a week or two off before I start posting my new Stalker!Billy fic.
Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters! If tagging doesn't work for some reason (aka Tumblr being dumb) I post most Fridays around 7:30 gmt.
Tag List : @vaguekayla @thdcre @rensolodriver @house-husband-of-castlemurdock
I think the saying is "all good things must come to an end." Well, this is the end of an absolutely amazing fantastic vampire!Billy Russo fanfic!!!! I'm so sad, yet so satisfied!!! Everyone who like Billy fics needs to go read this right now!
