Glitch's Mess

Glitch | They/Them | Nonbinary AroAce

[achillesinhighheels]

unfortunately i do believe that every time i delay watching a film it’s because it’s going to find me at the perfect time

[wolfliet]

can’t spell erotic without rot #myrot

[gouged-doll]

[elfagito]

every friend group has a corpse in it. if you think yours doesn't, YOU'RE the corpse.

[oldenglishtextposts]

ælc heap freonda hæfþ an lic. gif wenst næfþ þin, ÞU EART þæt lic

[injuries-in-dust]

[lakemojave]

@inneskeeper

[flagellant]

...I want to refute this but no, I....yeah

[tundrakatiebean]

[captions]

Person on screen: needs a couple pats of butter, a splash of olive oil, simmered on low with a bay leaf and a cinnamon stick. What?! You never seen a boy who knows his way around the kitchen? 

Yeah my mom always wanted a little girl but she got stuck with me instead. That wasn’t gonna stop her though so all my friends were opening up nerf guns and bmx bikes on their birthday, I was getting crockpots. 

(scene changes to the person dressed in a nice black suit jacket, bright pink dress shirt, and black tie) Yeah laugh it up! Take a picture while you’re at it 'cause this is the last time you’ll ever see me in a suit! How do boys wear these things??

(scene changes to the person dressed in the same shirt and tie with no jacket and the shirt cuffs unbuttoned and rolled up, with purple nail polish on their nails) No, I don’t know how to fight. I was only ever taught how to deescalate situations with healthy communication and emotional validation.

[coldwateriztasty]

[zoromance]

so has anybody’s dad ever actually apologized to them, or is that just an urban legend

[byjove]

“Why are American kids the sickest of any developed nation?” I dunno, maybe because we have a for-profit medical system, social welfare programs are constantly being undermined, environmental protections have been rolled back, companies are allowed to market any kind of bullshit they want, the housing/cost of living crisis means a lot of children are living in cramped, mold infested shitholes ran by landleeches and- vaccines? Oh, you think vaccines are what is causing it?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

been a rough couple days, gimme a compliment and also a fucked up animal fact please n thnx?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this website always suceeds in disappointing 🥰

[charlataninred]

I need people to learn what death of the author actually is. It isn’t “jkr who? Harry Potter was written by Daniel Radcliffe” or whatever the fuck. It means “I don’t care what jkr says she intended or not, the Harry Potter books are riddled with misogyny and ableism and racism.” It means “I don’t give a fuck that Andy Weir claims to not put politics in his books, Project Hail Mary has a shit ton of political statements in it. Stratt being a woman is a political/social statement. Which countries are involved with the petrova task force is political. The fact they get funding is political.”

Death of the author just means that you’re focusing on the reader’s interpretation of the work, not the author’s intention. It can also ignore the author’s history/beliefs, yes, and you can absolutely critique that, but that is why it is a literary theory and just ONE way to interact with literature, not the end-all-be-all of literary criticism

[cryinglawstudent]

God forbid you ask a pharmacy to fill a prescription

[kikokuso]

I have a new favourite batshit rail idea

Please build it for the funny please please please

[vacuously-true]

You're right. I SHOULD be able to take the train from Minneapolis to Berlin.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

we need more fat fitness instructors and I'm dead fucking serious

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

to be seen on social media, fitness instructors basically always have to have contemporarily attractive body types. whereas fitness instructors you meet in real life have a huge variety of body types.

being a well-qualified fitness instructor requires education and experience and yes, usually a significant level of fitness, be that strength, flexibility, stamina, so on.

Many people have all of those qualifications, while also being fat.

Perhaps the biggest lie advertising has sold you is that being "fit" means being thin. That is spectacularly untrue. The world is filled with fat athletes, amateur, professional, in all variety of sports, performing remarkable feats any of us would be damn proud to accomplish. That's a hell of a lot of experience and talent, including many educators you or I would be lucky to learn from.

[kingcatnine]

proposal to replace the common usage of "chud" with "chump" so as to not throw around a word that means facist... it is better to have a chump son than a chud son but it still conveys the fact that he is a loser and you don't like him very much

[kingcatnine]

like if you're looking for a word with a similar mouthfeel and loserly connotations you can slot into place where you or others have been using chud in a playful manner i think chump is just the ticket. fuck my chimp life okay my typo has spawned a beautiful new opportunity what is a chimp life and why wouldn't someone like to have one

[strawberrydykke]

opened up ravelry to look at patterns and the very first thing i saw was

The Garment by Robert Cole

[littlebirdinagarden]

I had to immediately look for myself and I feel like this post needs the addition of the very first line in the pattern description

[theswisscheeserag]

You gotta be really publicly passionate about things if you want your friends to text you. Bc people will forget to text you because they’re human. But if you’re really openly the friend who loves identifying ants your friends will think of you when they see ants. And they’ll text you “what ant is this [blurry photo]”. And then they’ll ask you how you’ve been and we should get coffee sometime. But if they don’t know what you love they’ll never know what you like

[theswisscheeserag]

And then when the ant convention is in town they’ll be like dude… we should go to the ant convention. But they would never think to go if they didn’t know u loved ants

[theswisscheeserag]

And sometimes you need to ask them to go to the ant convention. But you Will not get anywhere hiding your passions

[ratty-writer]

english major brain: words can evolve and develop as a society goes on. the way a word is used is its definition. it's pointless to hold onto the idea of right vs wrong words human brain: THAT IS NOT WHAT LARP MEANS!!!!!

[furryprovocateur]

i think the amount of ads we see in a given day is insanely immoral and all advertising should be gutted. like i know that'll never happen but in my dream world i would never see another ad in my life