Randall Lynn Corbin Jr.

Just writing what is on my mind.

[randalllcorbin]

For 5 years, G-Man has taught me more about unconditional love than I could've ever imagined. He's headed off to pre-k next week and Taylor and I are excited and terrified. When we brought him home from the hospital and finally got settled, I went to the bedroom by myself to let all the emotions go that I was holding in since the birth. What I didn't know was that they wouldn't go away. It was the feeling of losing the ability to be responsible for my own happiness. I know it will get easier but i hope it doesn't get any faster. I will try to hold on to this moment in time to try and make it slow down. But so far, I'm not very good at it since it seems like yesterday your grown ass dad was wondering what in the hell was happening while crying by myself looking at your 3 day old face. I love you so much buddy.

[randalllcorbin]

(Un)common sense

Someone says "gun control" and everyone starts screaming at each other while not listening at all. I have a gun. But I think there should be stricter gun laws. I think the gun show loop hole should be closed and more strict background checks will help. Will it keep all bad people from guns? No. But there is more to it than that. It is a fact that we are the only developed country that this happens this frequently. Is it the culture? Or lack of accessibility to mental healthcare? Or do we just breed more sociopathic cowards? How about we try to care more about people, improve our mental healthcare system, and make common sense gun laws that don't allow unlicensed gun show salesman to sell guns without background checks. If that stopped someone from killing one person, it would be worth it.

[randalllcorbin]

Orange Hate

This is what comes to be when you put a face on racial and religious intolerance. I am admittedly a political junkie but I cannot understand anyone, regardless of how much you pay attention, that can get behind a candidate that divides us along so many lines. In my opinion, the most important attribute a person can have is empathy. My biggest hope is that my boys grow up and are able to put themselves in other people's shoes and never look down on someone for being different. When you tap into people's fear and hatred you give them someone to look down on as "the problem". I am an unapologetic progressive and I have a love/hate relationship with politics and I most definitely feel the Bern. Republicans and democrats can get along, work together and compromise. But not if one side is a bully that acts like the villain from a Disney movie. Donald Trump represents the worst in all of us.

[randalllcorbin]

30

At 20 I was stupid. But soon I learned what I wanted to do as a career. I made my first mortgage payment. I held my boys for the first time and found out what real worry, patience, and love is. I realized I don't care about ending sentences in prepositions. Lots of firsts and lasts. First time leaving the country. Last time having fun at a club. First time being someone's boss. Last time to be a student. First time eating oysters. Last time eating oysters. In 10 years I will think I was stupid at 30. But, in my 20's, I began to realize how fast life is speeding up. So I am going to take time to cherish my firsts and lasts. In the next 10 years I will give my boys a bath for the last time. I will put them down and never pick them up again. 30 is just a number and I don't get upset or care about getting older but it's a good time to reflect and set new goals.... that I probably will set again for 31.

[randalllcorbin]

Problem Solved

If you are against gay marriage and believe you have the right to deny other people rights, then since we're both Americans and thus have the same rights, then I too have the right to deny other people rights. I hereby invoke the aforementioned right, and deny you the right to deny other people rights. There. Equality for everyone. Fixed it.

[randalllcorbin]

Kindness

The most powerful, infectious emotion in the world is bare bones, unfiltered kindness. True kindness is tolerant. It doesn’t look for recognition or rewards or the feeling of superiority. Because of technology, we have never been so close. But, it has also showed us the diversity of the people of this planet. The one thing that has triumphed throughout time is not one language, not one kind of government, one set of rules, or one religion. It has been the collective goodness of people to come together and denounce hate. With kindness, you cannot oppress, injure, bully or kill. When you have the mindset of everyone as equals, it’s much easier to put yourself in another’s shoes.

[randalllcorbin]

Slow Down...

Today is just another Thursday. Dinner, bath, playing, reading stories, breaking up fights, pj’s, brush teeth, hearing your sons tell you they love you for the first time, bed. Just when my eyes start to glaze over and I feel like I’m just going through the motions of every day monotony, these things bring me back.

These little people are growing so fast. I’ve never been someone to cling on to the past. I’ve never missed or wanted to go back to high school, sports or college. I’ve always enjoyed the next step and looking forward to what is next. But, these boys are changing every day and it would be okay with me if they pumped the brakes just a little bit.

I’ve told them that I love them so many times that it is just a reflex now. But, tonight for the first time I got to say:  I love you too, Greyson I love you too, Beckham

[randalllcorbin]

Fathers Day

All of us have several different identities. Husband. Son. Brother. Friend. Colleague. But, the most important role I have is father. I’ve only been at it for 3 years, 4 months & 26 days but it has been the most important time of my life.  Everyone knows the importance of mom. Moms are always there. Taking care of everything. Mom is the one that they cry for when there is a “boo boo”. Always bailing out the idiot dad in movies. Before I was a dad, I heard someone say that the most influential person in a child’s life is the parent of the same sex. I can see that now. I am molding little versions of myself. Children learn so much at odd moments when you are not trying to teach them. They watch how I brush my teeth, how I put on my shoes and how to eat with a fork. So, you can bet that they also pick up on how I treat their mother, how I react to stressful situations and even how I talk to strangers.  It does not take away your manhood to change diapers and give baths. It does the opposite. Scientific research has proven the huge impact fathers have on their children’s emotional, physical, mental and intellectual growth. So many parents do not or cannot spend time with their children. The way i think about it is that it will never be like this again. There are a limited number of times that my boys will fall asleep in my arms. A finite number of goodnight kisses. Their problems will not always be able to be fixed with a bandaid.   So this Father’s Day, I will try to keep my promise of never taking one day for granted with them.

[randalllcorbin]

For No One

I get it. I don’t agree with it anymore. But, I get it. It’s hard to pinpoint the exact time in which I started to question everything. I’m thinking it was around middle school. I remember hearing a preacher say that “The only way to be saved, is to be saved by Jesus Christ”. 

Maybe it was because I wasn’t raised in a strict religious household. Maybe it was my childlike curiosity. Or maybe, it is just the person that I am that led me to ask: “What about all of the people who weren’t taught about Jesus?” Am I just so lucky to be born in America. Lucky that I’m here and out of the 4,200 religions in the history of humans, I’m right and everyone else is wrong.

I was in high school when I went and bought my very own bible. I read it. Okay, I skimmed a lot of the begats and descriptions of clean and unclean foods in Leviticus. There is nothing in the bible that foreshadows anything beyond the date that it was written. The bible has many great teachings and moral lessons. But, so does the Quran, the Torah and other religious texts. If the bible was written by an all knowing God, I would think it would not have so many inconsistencies and downright terrible, outdated ways of thinking. Anyway, that was the beginning of my religious curiosity. Next, I took a class in college called “Religion in Life”. This class taught about many of the early religions that date back to the first writings in history 5,000 years ago. One of the best things this class taught me is to study Christianity in the same way as all the other religions. With an open mind. It should not be taboo to question an idea. And that is what religions are. Ideas. Beliefs. An unproven hypothesis. Not something that should be taught as an absolute truth to children who still believe in The Easter Bunny. Children are not Christians. They are told they are Christians. Most never question it as long as they live and if they do, they don’t tell anybody for fear of hell or being ostracized by their loved ones. Religions are drilled and drilled into heads from birth all over the world. Shouldn’t children be given a choice?  When you indoctrinate a child, you are making it much harder for them to think for themselves.  Two devout Muslims living in Saudi Arabia are very unlikely to have children who believe that the one true God is Jesus. 

I am not against the idea of God. I am against confusing belief with fact. I have the same problem with those claiming that there is absolutely no creator. No one knows. The only thing that we can do is study. Study our planet, our history, our universe, our religions.  When someone says the world is 6,000-10,000 years old, you are not attacking their religion by telling them they are wrong. But, they are wrong. There are multiple, proven, calculated ways to tell the age of earth. 
-Radiometric age dating has dated rocks to be 4.54 billion years old. 
-Ice cores have been taken from polar ice caps in Antarctica that show 800,000 years of summer/winter season changes. 

There are tons of different reasons why people believe. The thought that someone is always watching and judging everything you do and will punish and torture you for eternity is a very good sales pitch for religion. I know many people are believers in religion because they are scared not to believe. I think “believing” just incase there is a heaven/hell is not a good way to live your life. Be true to yourself. Question EVERYTHING! If no one questioned anything, we would still think the world was flat and the sun revolved around the earth. 

Some people believe with all of their hearts that they are blessed. Blessed with a good day. Blessed with a healthy baby. Blessed to get a promotion. This is a level of narcissism that I cannot even begin to understand. With statistical certainty, somewhere in the world, sometime soon, there is a child that will be abducted, tortured and murdered. There is nothing worse in this world. And it happens almost daily. If this happened just one time in the history of the world, it would be enough (for me) to doubt that there is a omniscient, omnipresent God that loves me. I know and have heard all of the religious explanations. Original sin, free will. But I cannot bow my head and expect a god to answer me when he does not answer those in dire need. 

Yes, organized religion especially in America can be very good for a whole lot of people. So many loving, caring, selfless people who take the best of the bibles teachings do great work and even save lives. But, you cannot say “It doesn’t hurt anyone”.  Religion is the main reason why in 2014, American citizens are still being oppressed by not being able to marry someone that they love.
  Religion is the main reason that Stem Cell research has been halted and does not get the funding it deserves. This research would literally save the lives of millions of sick people.  

Overall, I don’t think I am going to show this to anyone I know. I really just had to get it off my chest. I can’t imagine the reaction I would get if all of my family and friends read this. The culture and the way that people think about free thinkers is sad. It is looked down upon by many to talk about the FACT of evolution. I would hope that the people that know me wouldn’t think I deserve to burn in “hell” for eternity for having doubts that a book written thousands of years ago, translated many times by kings and others to suit their agendas might not have all the answers. I’ll end this with a quote that I have always loved. 

"Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones."