I’d like to think that under Ted’s polite midwestern personality he’s actually like this rough dominate person in bed lol.
Anyway, that is the inspiration behind this fanfic. I hope you enjoy.
Warnings: smut smut smut - porn with some plot. One night stand. Swearing (Ted swearing). PinV unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it). Blowjob. Ted is so eager to please (wink wink). Light choking. Hickeys/love bites. Ted dominates. Ted talks dirty (obviously).
*this is written as first person but there is use of y/n. This is my first time writing in this style and I wanted to experiment. Let me know what you think!*
Ted Lasso One Shot
I watch the stranger nurse a beer across the Crown and Anchor pub. In dire need of a one night stand, I decide the mustached patron is a suitable choice. I had just about given up on trying to find a distraction, trying to remember if I put batteries in my vibrator, when someone yelled from across the bar.
Two men - the one with the mustache was sitting with a man with a beard. His bearded companion yelled something like “dammit it is!” while slamming his hand on the table. The bearded companion said a few more heated words to the brunette just before storming out with a female.
I study him, finding him attractive in an older single dad type of way - just how I like them. They typically have already settled down and aren’t looking for anything serious, and I need just that right now. When I confirm he is not wearing a wedding band, I decide to make my move.
Mae sets one more glass in front of him, and I decide to make my move, not wanting him too inebriated. I slam back my shot for confidence, and saunter across the bar. He doesn’t look up, the almost defeated look being focused on the beverage in front of him.
“Hi.” I say, bringing his attention up at me. I don’t miss the quick glance that starts at my feet and drags its way up my body to my face. “This seat taken?” I ask, touching the back of the chair across from him.
He kind of blinks, the shocked look on his face remaining as he makes a small gesture for me to sit.
“Howdy.” He says, and I’m taken aback by the lack of the local accent. “It’s uh, pretty nice to hear an accent from home.” He says, the southern twang already making me weak.
“I’m inclined to agree.” I say with a smile he doesn’t quite meet. “Where are you from?” I ask.
“Kansas.” He says. He’s looking back at his beer.
“Indiana.” I say, and he perks up, giving me a little smile.
“Well I’ll be, Stan Lee. If it isn’t another midwesterner!” The unique exclamation makes me chuckle.
“Is Kansas considered midwest?” I ask, trying to start the flow of a conversation.
“Yes ma’am it is, and I do not believe it is up for debate.” He tells me, and I throw my hands up in defense.
“Well then my apologies, sir!” I see him becoming more relaxed, and I mentally cheer. I extend my hand. “I’m (Y/N).”
“Ted. It is a pleasure to meet ya.” He grabs my hand and shakes it. “Can I buy you a drink?” He asks, and I nod, shamelessly batting my eyelashes at him with a coy grin. His mustache twitches slightly with a smirk of his lips.
He waves Mae over, and when she sees me sitting with him, she doesn’t need to ask before bringing my usual. Ted gives me a look and I grin.
“Now how are you that much of a regular and this is the first time I’m seein’ you?” He asks. “Surely, I’d notice someone as beautiful as you.” I blush, biting my lip with a smile.
“Now, don’t call me Shirley.” I say, and he throws his head back laughing.
We spend the next hour before the last call flirting and talking. Getting to know each other, talking about growing up in the Midwest and America, and how different England is. It’s just enough that we’re not complete strangers, but not enough to form anything serious. We slowly become more and more touchy with each other with each drink we have, and when Mae rings the bell for last call, our legs are intertwined, my fingers trace mindless circles on the back of his hand, and we’ve leaned in closer to each other. The intentions have become crystal clear.
“Want to get out of here?” I whisper, ready to take me back to my place and do unspeakable things to each other.
Ted stares at me for what seems like forever, and I want to curl up and die from the impending rejection. He almost looks like he’s thinking way too hard.
“I’d like that very much.” He says, and I fight the sigh of relief.
We stand, and his hand finds its place on the small of my back, burning contact that makes me lean into his touch. We both wave at Mae, and she gives one or both of us a knowing look. When we exit, we’re the only ones on the sidewalk. Before I walk down to the street to attempt to hail a cab for us, I feel a grip on my elbow, and I’m whirled around.
A hand is on the back of my head and lips are crushed down on mine in an instant, and I wrap my arms around Ted. His mustache tickles as he opens his mouth to stick his tongue in my mouth, and I open mine greedily. We make out on the sidewalk for a few minutes, hands roaming shamelessly. After about a minute or so, he breaks away, our heavy pants mingling with one another.
“I’m mighty sorry. That was not very gentlemanly of me.” Ted says as he still holds me.
“I’m not really looking for a gentleman, Ted.” I whisper against his lips, and his eyes slightly darken as I feel his hands on my hips tighten.
“I’m just a few doors down, (y/n).” He whispers in a husky voice, and I smile seductively. “Care to join me for a nightcap?” We both know it’s just a line to politely ask me to his place, seeing how we were just drinking mere minutes ago, but I eagerly agree.
I don’t think I’ve ever walked so fast in my life, the way Ted was practically dragging me down the sidewalk as I laughed. We can’t keep our hands off each other, and by the time we reach his door, he’s trying to get his key out and unlock it as he presses me up against it, lips latched on to my neck. I bite my lip, getting furiously turned on as I feel him leave a mark just under my jawline.
I yelp as he lifts me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist when he pushes the door open. Our lips are attacking each other again, and the door slams behind us. We stumble around, and Ted slams me up against the wall, eliciting a moan from me. He presses his bulge against my crotch, and ruts against it as my hands intertwine with his hair. His hand has pulled aside the collar of my shirt, and he’s sucking harshly on my collarbone.
“Ted.” I gasp out in a moan, and his hands grab my wrists to bring them up over my head, pinning me.
I gasp erotically at this sweet, charming gentleman showing a rough side. There are bangs above us, causing us to break apart and look up. His pelvis no longer presses up against mine, causing me to drop my shaking legs to plant my feet on the ground. But he keeps my wrists pinned gently.
“Sorry Miss Shipley!” Ted shouts, and I giggle.
He looks back at me, face flushed and hair tussled. “Let me take you back to the bedroom, ‘right darlin'?”
I nod, the accent and the pet name enough to make me come undone right there. “Yes, sir.” I say, and Ted lets out a deep rumble from his throat.
We race to the bedroom, hands and lips continuing their exploration. I let out another yelp as I’m picked up and thrown on the bed. I laugh as I bounce, Ted’s body encasing mine as our lips meet again. His hips are inbetween my legs again, and the bulge I didn’t think could get any bigger grinds against my crotch.
“Ted.” I say against his lips, and he hums. My hands are on the hem of his sweater. “Too many clothes.” I say, slightly bringing his sweater up, almost like I’m asking permission.
“I am inclined to agree, sugar.” The other pet name hits me deep in my core - and lower. “I know you said you don’t want a gentleman, but forgive me for my midwestern charm” he says with a smirk as he hovers over me. “I was still raised right so I have to ask, y/n. Do you want this to continue? ‘Cause darlin', when I start taking these delicious wrappins off of ya, I’m gonna wanna keep going until you are screaming my name.” I bite my lip at his words dripping with seductive promise.
“Oh god yes please.” I gasp out, and he chuckles. “Yes, Ted. I want this. I want you. Very badly.” I plead, and instead of meeting my lips, he slowly crawls back down my body so that he’s standing at the edge of the bed.
I sit up, his legs in between mine that are hanging off the edge. His hands are at the bottom of my shirt, and I lift my arms with him so that he can swiftly take it off. I push his sweater up, and his hands are behind his neck on his collar pulling it up, discarding it to wherever with my shirt. I reach up to start unbutton his white shirt, but Ted has other plans. He unbuttons my shorts, and then grabs my ankles, giving them a slight yank so that I’m on my back, and his hands are quickly on my shorts, bringing them down my legs. He kneels at the edge of the bed when my ankles come through the pant holes, and his touch is burning as I feel his hands run up my calves, behind my knee, and grasps my thighs.
I sit up on my elbows and watch as he presses his lips on the inside of my left knee, then my right. My breathing hitches as his mustache tickles its way up my inner thigh. His hands have grabbed my thong, and I barely lift my hips enough to have him yank my panties down. When he brings his head back up in between my thighs, he hitches my legs up so they’re resting on his shoulder.
“I bet you taste as sweet as sugar.” Ted growls, his hot breath against my wet cunt causes me to gasp.
He dives in, immediately eliciting a moan from me as my hand finds its grasp in his hair. His tongue makes a bold stripe through my core, and when his mouth moves to suck on my bud, his mustache tickles the bare skin just above my clit.
“Oh fuck!” I scream out when his tongue starts flicking, and I feel a finger slowly push into me. “Ted!” I moan out his name, my thighs tensing.
He is sucking my clit while flicking it, and he enters a second finger, and I feel an orgasm building. If he was dying of thirst, you would have thought my pussy was an oasis. The way he is eating me out, he’s not letting a single drop go to waste. His fingers are fast and his mouth is moving like he’s eating a papaya, like he’s trying to suck the life out of me.
“Oh god Ted, yes! I’m gonna-” I barely make out words as his fingers expertly curl inside of me.
“Are you gonna come, darlin'?” My moan is his only answer. “C’mon, let me taste that sugar, sugar.” He says before his mouth sloppily attacks me again.
The dirty talk in his fucking accent threatens to send me over the edge, and with a large suck and a quick flick, I’m screaming out a moan as he sucks my orgasm out of me - literally. I ride it out on his mouth and fingers, and he starts to slow down his pace, just a little bit so that it’s not too much, but I’m still gasping and moaning as I’m coming down from the high.
Holy shit. I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone eat my pussy like that.
“My pleasure.” I hear Ted say, and I realize I said that outloud. I laugh breathlessly, and know he’s so damn proud of himself that I’m not even embarrassed.
His fingers pull out, and I watch as he sucks them clean. He gives me a wink as his fingers leave his mouth. “Even sweeter than a rocket popsicle on the Fourth of July.” I laugh at a line I’m sure he can’t use with many women here.
I swallow breathlessly as Ted stands up, still in between my quivering legs. I sit up, reaching for the belt on his khakis. His bulging cock is in front of me, straining against the fabric. He lets me undo his belt, button, and zipper in a hurried fashion, one of his hands on my head petting my hair. I pull his khakis down, and he steps out of them. I bite my lip at the shape of his cock against his tight boxer briefs. I reach up, and begin unbuttoning his white dress shirt. He looks down at me with a devilish grin, his hair messed up from my hands flopping across his forehead.
I undo his buttons at a pace I didn’t even think was possible for my hands. When he shrugs it off, I laugh at the white undershirt - so many layers. He pulls that off quickly, and I marvel at his body, toned but still a dad-bod that I find so hot. I drag my eyes down his body, following the trail of hair that leads into his boxers. When I finally stop eye fucking him, I bring my gaze back up, only to find Ted’s dark eyes drilling a promise into mine.
His thumbs tuck in the sides of his briefs, pulling them down. My pussy clenches at the length of his cock that springs free. My hands are instantly around him, and he groans as I bring my lips around the tip of his cock, flicking my tongue. I feel both his hands on the back of my head, intertwining in my hair but not quite pushing as I slowly slip his cock in my mouth. He’s huge, and I almost gag when he hits the back of my throat. I pull back, sucking until I release him with a pop and he moans again.
“Good Lord, darlin', I wanna fuck your face so bad.” Ted confesses in a deep, husky voice. “But I need to fuck your cunt first.”
For the first time in my life, I wonder if a dick is going to fit in me. My eyes widen and I swallow in anticipation. I reach behind me and undo my bra, quickly sliding it off and flinging it to the side. I watch his gaze drop down to my breasts as they slightly bounce from their restraints. I sit back on the bed and grin at him.
“Well then get over here and fuck me.” I say. “What are you waiting for, Teddy?” I tease, and he pounces.
I’m on my back on the bed, my tongue in his mouth and his hands back to pinning my wrist above my head. He breaks away only to place his mouth on my neck, sucking and biting, and giving me a third hickey - marking me. This time, it’s under my ear, his breath and mustache tickling me and sending chills down my body.
“Do I need a condom?” Ted whispers breathlessly into my ear.
“I’m clean and on birth control.” I say, and he brings his face to hover above mine.
“I’m clean.” He says, and I grin.
“I want you to come inside of me, Ted.” I whisper against his lips.
“Fuck.” He gasps and kisses me again. The swear word is so foreign on his lips after an hour of hearing shoot and darn.
I feel his bare cock on my skin, and I spread my legs as he reaches down to line us up. I gasp at how big he feels just by starting with the tip. My jaw drops as he pushes his way into me.
“The look on your face when I put my cock in you is enough to make me come all over you, y/n.” Ted says as our eyes meet when his full size is in me.
He gives me a second to adjust, and I give him a small nod and a quick buck of the hips to signal to him that I’m ready. He starts slow, letting me savor his length as he pumps in and out. It’s slow, but at the last bit of cock left, he rams hard and sharp into me, causing me to yelp every time. He does this a few times, hitting me deep.
“This pussy belongs to me, y/n.” Ted growls. “Say it. Whose pussy is this?” He asks, thrusting into me.
“It’s yours!” I practically scream. “It’s so fucking yours, Ted.” He chuckles mischievously, fucking me so hard my breasts bounce.
Quicker than I’ve ever experienced, I feel an orgasm coming.
“Shit. Ted I’m gonna come.” I manage to get out, and he increases his pace, causing me to moan. Loud enough to be heard upstairs.
“Come for me. Show me how much you like me fucking you like this.” Ted whispers in my ear, and my hands are on his shoulders, nails digging in as I release myself. He’s pounding into me, faster as he feels me clench around his length. That doesn’t stop him though - in fact, he continues riding out my orgasm by keeping the same, fast pace.
“Oh my god, yes!” I scream out, and he laughs. As I come down from my high, he starts to slow down and my thighs involuntary squeeze around him, causing him to groan.
“Get on all fours for me, sugar.” Ted demands.
I eagerly flip over, and get on my hands and knees on the bed. I feel Ted’s hand on my hips again, lining himself up.
“Grab the headboard and hang on tight for me, darlin.” He commands, and I do just that as I feel his cock push into me.
I can’t help the ‘oh fuck yes!’ that I scream as he slowly stretches into me.
My knuckles turn white as I grip the headboard, and finally, his hips meet my ass as he bottoms out inside of me. I’ve never felt so full, and I moan as I feel him adjust his knees, and the anticipation of him to start fucking me reaches a high.
I feel a hand gather up my hair into a makeshift ponytail and gently pull so my head is pulled up.
“This okay, sugar?” Ted asks, and I nod frantically.
“Shit, yes, Ted. Please. Please fuck me.” I beg.
He chuckles, the only warning I get as I feel a hand on my hip and he pulls back. Faster than I can blink, Ted rams into me, and begins pumping at a fast pace. I’m moaning and screaming incoherently as he fucks me. Ted pounds into me so fast and hard that it brings a new definition of fucking. I’m thoroughly impressed by how long he’s able to fuck me at this pace, and all comparisons to anyone I’ve been with before fly out the window.
“Such a good girl. You take my cock so well, y/n.” My eyes roll to the back of my head as I feel an orgasm build.
Between the hair pulling, the dirty talk, and the sizable cock pumping inside of me, I’m a mess of screams, sweat, and cum. My orgasm hits me so hard, my vision goes black from how hard I’m squeezing my eyes shut. The headboard I’m desperately clinging to rattles against the wall. I almost feel bad for Ms. Shipley.
Almost.
“Come on my cock, y/n.” And he doesn’t have to tell me twice.
It’s hard to tell when one orgasm ends and the other begins, Ted fucking me with an eagerness to please, and holy shit does he please well.
“Oh God, y/n. This pussy was made for my cock.” Ted groans out as he begins to slow down, sliding in and out of me at a tortuous pace so I can feel every inch that stretches me, him making sure to really milk my orgasms.
“I wanna ride you.” I gasp out. I don’t know how I’m able to form words when his cock is so damn deep in me.
“What was that darlin?” Ted stops, dick fully inside of me.
“Can I ride you, Ted?” I ask, looking over my shoulder at this glorious man.
“There’s nothing I’d like more than to see you bouncing on my cock.” Ted says with a grin.
I match his grin, but I still whimper as he completely pulls out of me. We’re quick to adjust, Ted laying on his back, and me bringing a leg over to straddle him. I align myself over his upright cock, and this time, it is my turn to set the pace. I slowly let myself fall on his cock, both of us moaning as I slide down on him. Ted has his head thrown back and his eyes screwed shut. I lean down and start kissing and sucking on his neck, marking him how he marked me.
I come back up to admire my work, and Ted gives me a mischievous grin before bucking his hips up, jolting me and hitting deeper inside of me. I shout out and laugh, bracing myself on him to start bouncing.
“Oh y/n you keep bouncing like that and I’m not going to last much longer.” I feel a hard grip on my hips and almost laugh.
Ted’s already lasted significantly longer than any other man I know of, but the fact that he can go longer is enticing. But I want to make him feel as good as he makes me feel.
“I wanna come while bouncing on your cock when you come inside of me.” I whisper against his lips, and he groans.
I sit back up and he watches with dark eyes as I quicken my pace. His hands have grasped onto my breasts for added leverage, and soon, his mouth is latched onto a nipple, with his fingers pinching the other. Ted has started jutting up his hips to match my pace, and the room is filled with harsh breaths and moans.
“Fuck Ted!” I scream out. “Fuck please I wanna come!” I beg, both of our movements becoming harsh and sloppy. I’m so damn sensitive, but I don’t let that slow my bouncing, determined to make both of us come.
“Come on my cock, sugar.” Ted commands, and I’m unleashed.
My nails dig into his chest, and Ted grunts as he keeps pumping into me, his orgasm chasing mine. With a harsh thrust up into me that causes me to scream out a moan, Ted spills into me with a loud moan that mixes with mine. I keep slowly moving up and down on shaky legs, milking every last drop out of both of us. I ride out the remnants of my orgasm on Ted’s now softening cock. I slow down, feeling the sticky juices leak out of me and onto Ted when I pull up and the absence of his cock leaves a feeling of emptiness in me.
We’re breathing heavily when I collapse next to him, and when we turn to look at each other, we start laughing. Ted rolls over, throwing an arm around me, and he starts kissing the sore, red marks on my neck. Marks that are no doubt will be fully formed hickies tomorrow.
“I didn’t hurt ya now, did I?” He asks, brushing a thumb along one of the marks.
I shake my head. The dynamic change of his sweet, kind gentleman to dominating, possessive man makes me chuckle, even though I find it very attractive.
“No.” I smile. “It’s extremely hot the way you marked me.” I watch him blush and stand up, grabbing my hand and leading me into the bathroom.
He hands me a robe to cover myself, and I watch as he begins to run a bath. I’m in awe at the contrast between who just fucked me and who is looking at me now. When I drop my robe, he guides me into the tub and sits behind me, gently washing me. Exhaustion hits me, and it doesn’t quite register that this is not normally what I would do after a one night stand. After a while, we are drying each other off, and I throw back on the robe while he puts on sweats and a Joe Arthur BBQ shirt. We’re talking about everything under the sun, and we know a lot more about each other than at the beginning of the night. We’re laughing and sharing a jar of peanut butter, telling stories and asking questions, finding comfort in the midwestern familiarity.
At one point in the middle of a story, I look over, and Ted is passed out. I laugh, and quietly shuffle around his apartment to put my clothes on and get out. I find a notepad and quickly jot down my number and name, before taking off into the night.
The next morning, I wake up in my own bed with the sun shining. I groggily get myself up and around for a lazy Saturday, and when I glance at my phone.
Unknown number: It’s hard to make you breakfast when you’re gone in the morning.
I laugh while reading it, not looking at the TV while I flick it on, knowing exactly who I’m talking to.
Me: But now you owe me breakfast. Guess we’ll have to see each other again.
I shake my head, still giggling like a little girl when I accept the fact that this is not just a normal one night stand.
I find disappointment filling me after an hour of Ted not answering me. Thinking I probably pushed it too far, I try to focus on the TV, flipping through the channels. Suddenly, I see Ted on the screen in front of me.
I gasp out loud and sit up as he sits at a press conference table. Ted Lasso: AFC Richmond Manager. I read the tag as he talks in that accent, making jokes the same way he told them to me last night. After a quick google search, I find out a lot more information that Ted left out when we were telling each other. Granted, we never talked about what we did, but you would think being a Premiere League soccer coach would come up.
I guess they call it “football” here.
I watch as the camera goes back on a close shot of Ted, and I can’t help but laugh out loud at the hickey on his neck. He is constantly pulling at the collar of the white dress shirt that is under his sweater, desperately trying to cover it up. However, it only draws attention to it.
Me: Nice hickey
I snap a photo of the TV, and send it with the text. Soon, the press conference ends, and I flip back through channels when my phone buzzes.
Ted: And whose fault is that?
Me: Are you going to punish me?
After about another hour consisting of me panicking that I took it too far again, my phone rings, and I quickly answer the phone call coming from Ted.
“So, you found me out, huh?” Ted asks, laughing.
“Kind of hard to hide who you are when you’re on television, Ted.” I tease.
“Whatcha doin right now?” His tone kind of shifts.
“Nothing.”
“What are you wearing, y/n.” He growls, and I grin.
I look down at my fully clothed figure and decide to have some fun. “Seeing how I left my underwear somewhere at your place, I would have to say nothing.” I hear a sigh on the other end of the phone and laugh.
“You remember where I live?” Ted asks, and I respond adamantly, already putting shoes on and grabbing my keys.
“Be there in five.” I tell him, knowing he can hear me leave.
“I’ll be waiting at the door, sugar.” And the line disconnects.