me, a writer, at 3am: WHAT? I CANT FIND THE SPECIFIC FANFIC THAT I MADE UP IN MY MIND WITH A WHOLE PLOT AND ORIGINAL CHARACTERS??? WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE??? DO THEY EXPECT ME TO WRITE THE STORY I THOUGHT UP OF???
ted lasso. afc richmond’s new coach, and your favourite victim to mess with. there’s just something about him. whether it’s the large age gap, that sexy midwestern accent, the silly moustache— it’s safe to admit you’ve got a little crush on him.
today, like every other day, you’re back in his office with a box full of his favourite biscuits, twirling your hair and giggling at every single word he says.
“ohhhh sweet mother of jesus. these gosh-darn cookies… they’re somethin’ else.” ted groans, biting into one, eyes fluttering shut as he leans back in his chair.
“yeah? you like them?”
“darlin’, the day i say no to that question is the day you gotta start lookin’ for the real ted lasso ‘cause that’s an imposter standin’ in front of ya.” you giggle, perching on the edge of his desk. he gives you a warm smile— that classic ted lasso smile that can easily brighten your whole day.
“coach, you got a bit of—“ you murmur, eyes narrowing at the crumbs on his moustache.
“oh—yep—such a messy eater, aren’t i?” he chuckles, letting you brush the crumbs from his face as he tilts his head.
“lemme just—” you bend forward, giving ted a full view of your cleavage, making it practically impossible for him to look away. he swallows hard, feeling his cock twitch in his pants.
when you place one hand high up his thigh to get a better angle, his whole body tenses up, sweat forming on his forehead.
“oi! the fuck is this?!” roy’s gravelly voice ripples through the air like an earthquake, and for a second you swear you could feel the floor beneath you tremble.
“roy!” you squeal excitedly, acting oblivious to the raunchy scene he just walked in on— you, sitting on the edge of ted’s desk, short skirt riding up your bare thighs, tits nearly spilling out of your top in ted’s flustered face.
ted’s eyes turn comically wide, only making him look more guilty than he actually is. roy storms at him and points an accusing finger right in his red-as-a-tomato face.
“she’s half your age, you fuckin’ bellend!”
“oh, boy… let’s not jump to any conclusions, son.” ted raises his hands in surrender as he jumps up from his chair, shaking his head, “she just brought me some cookies! very, very delicious cookies, at that. you should try some if you—”
roy lets out a low grunt, making ted blink rapidly.
“alrighty… a-anyway, we were just chattin’, yeah? platonic—so very platonic—boy, couldn’t be more platonic than this. ain’t that right?”
you nod, unable to contain the cheeky grin spreading across your face as you coyly swing your legs.
“see!” he lets out a nervous laugh, “you know what you need, roy? one of these to cheer ya up.” he grabs a biscuit from the box and hands it to roy with a cheerful nod, who crumples it right in front of ted’s face like it’s nothing.
“or… not. you know what, that’s fine— maybe—maybe you’re just gluten intolerant. more common than you might think!”
roy grabs his collar and yanks him close, face turning a shade of purple that seems humanly impossible.
“if i see you near her one more time, you’re a dead man walking. you hear me, lasso?”
you jump down from the desk, “oh please, roy. don’t be so angry! ted’s a nice guy” you pout, voice breathy and a little too flirty, but roy releases ted nonetheless. he storms out, muttering a ‘fuckin’ hell’ under his breath, and slams the door shut.
“i’m sorry, coach. he’s just such a drama queen, but don’t mind him, ‘kay?” you run a hand over his chest, feeling his heartbeat racing under your palm.
“well, shoot… i reckon that’s my cue to start lockin’ this door during biscuit time, huh?”
kiss somebody, drink that honey - Ted Lasso x fem!reader
Word count: 3,9k
Tags: smut, NSFW, Minors do not interact 🔞, mentions of drinking, dancing, workplace affairs, power imbalance(ish), fingering, unprotected p in v, using pulling out as protection (DO NOT DO THIS IRL GOD), age gap, softdom!Ted
Summary:You plan a double date with your friend, but your date stands you up. However when another guy invites you to a drink and some dancing, there's a pair own eyes sticking to you all night.
Author's note: This has been standing in my WIP folder for more than a year, being like 80% finished and I totally forgot about it but found it again yesterday, so I thought I'd finish it, hope some of you will like it. ❤
On a regular Friday evening you’d be sitting at your table together with your friends at your favourite bar – the faint smell of hardwood and old leather would mix with the sweet scent of various liquors and delicious food while you’d be laughing about an awkward situation or a hilarious story.
However, on this particular Friday evening you were sitting across your friend and his date. It’s not like you were voluntarily third wheeling them, you were waiting for your own date, who happened to stand you up. You just sat there nursing your drink as you saw a glimpse of a hand on a thigh in front of you and you averted your gaze. Talk about awkward.
The music was loud enough in your ears to muffle the sweet nothings the guy whispered into your friend’s ear as your eyes wandered around the bar. A few people were mingling on the small dance floor, a couple was making out in the corner and a few guys sat at the bar, engaged in a seemingly meaningful discussion.
Your heart skipped a beat when one of them slightly turned his head and revealed his identity to you - his beautiful face turned your way and his eyes caught yours. A look of surprise spread across his features before he flashed a big moustachioed smile towards you. You nodded at him and turned back to your table immediately, heat rushing through your body. It was Ted, from work.
You haven’t spoken an awful lot to him, mostly just small talk in the cafeteria or a small wave on the corridors. But that didn’t stop you from having a huge crush on him.
Your eyes landed on the couple in front of you and you rolled your eyes. You were damned wherever you looked. You took a sip of your drink, the alcohol burned your throat as it traveled and settled in your stomach, but the warmth you felt there wasn’t caused by the drink. You felt it was silly and maybe bit of a schoolgirl crush, but you couldn't help it. He just had something in him that made you want him close to you. Want to look into his eyes. Feel his hands on your waist. Feel his breath grazing your lips.
A voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you looked up at the man standing next to your table. You didn’t know him, at least you couldn't recall. He was tall and had kind eyes, small dimples framed his smile.
“Excuse me?” You asked, embarrassed that you didn’t catch what he was saying. His smile widened before he spoke again.
“Just wanted to see if you’d like to join me for a drink. But I don’t want to steal you from your... friends” he said, and he paused before saying the last word, cocking his brow at your friend and his date being entangled in each other. You sighed and stood up next to him.
“Sure, a drink couldn't hurt.” You told him your name and shook his hand.
“I’m Daniel” he replied, and he stretched his hand towards the small table he was sitting at and while looking over, your eyes caught a pair of beautiful brown ones. Your eyes lingered at him for a long second before you averted your gaze, heat creeping up your skin.
With only one look Ted could make your heart flutter like a hummingbird. You followed your new date – Daniel – towards his table, which meant you had to pass by Ted and Beard. You tried not to look too much their way to not seem so obvious, but when you passed them you heard your name being called. You stopped in your tracks and turned around, and Daniel followed suit.
“Hello there” Ted nodded your way, and Beard followed.
“Hey Ted! Beard” you said, standing a few feet away from them. Daniel’s gaze shifted between the three of you.
“Good to see you outside of work” Ted said with a beaming smile, his eyes wandering towards Daniel for a second. “Having some good ole’ fun!” He was nursing a beer with one of his hands and you couldn’t help but notice how the sleeves of his dark navy sweatshirt are rolled up, hugging his arms perfectly. You felt heat rise in your body as you tried to regulate your breathing.
“Yeah, well… Gotta blow off some steam from time to time!” Holy shit, why were you so awkward? “I guess I’ll see you at the pitch on Monday?”
“You bet, missy” he smiled and waved the two of you off. You turned away and slowly let out a shaky breath. You settled next to Daniel at his table and took a sip of your drink.
“Was he your boss?”
“No!” You protested before you continued. “Well, I don’t know. Sorta? He’s the coach of the football team that I work for.”
“Bloody hell, you’re right, that’s where he was familiar from! You work for Richmond?” Daniel’s eyes were glowing with excitement, and you weren’t surprised – most people loved their football around here.
“Yeah, I am” you chuckled and took another sip of your drink. You were sitting in the old leather booth with your back against a wall and he was sitting across of you, so you had a great viewpoint on the whole bar. That meant that you saw every time Ted’s eyes were wandering towards you through the crowd. You tried to pay no mind to it, but every time his gaze lingered on you, your stomach dropped, and your heart went into overdrive.
Daniel was a sweet guy and you were having quite a great time – you were talking and laughing about your jobs, football and all kinds of stuff. Even though you weren’t a huge fan of the game initially, working at a football club made you quite fond of football. Especially since Ted was the gaffer. But that was nobody’s business.
As the evening grew older the music became a bit louder, casual after-work groups were switched out by louder party people who occupied the dance floor. You nodded your head and tapped your fingers to the beat of the music before you noticed an inviting hand in front of you.
“Would you spare me a dance?” Daniel asked and you raised a brow at him.
“I’m a shitty dancer” you replied with your brow quirked, but you accepted the invite.
You awkwardly shuffled to the small dance floor that was across the bar, where a certain football coach was still sitting. You tried to pay no mind to that fact, but the feeling of his eyes on you was hard to shake. Dan was holding your hand ‘til you found a comfortable spot and twirled you around to face him. A giggle bubbled up from your chest as he pulled you closer and you started moving to the rhythm.
The alcohol worked hard to cut away your inhibition, and that mixed with the loud music in your ear made you bold and carefree. You were moving your body freely to the music, putting your hands above your head, in your hair, and on Dan’s shoulders. As you twirled your eyes caught Ted’s stare as he was gripping his thigh so hard his knuckles turned pale. It only took a second but a sudden feeling of light-headedness took over you and you almost tripped.
Why was he looking at you all evening? Why did he seem anxious, even agitated? Was it because of you? Was he… jealous?
The thoughts raced in your head as questions flooded your mind. He surely wasn’t jealous; it’s just your wishful thinking.
Devilish thoughts ran through your head as you turned your back to your dance partner and smiled at him before you pushed your back flush against his chest and threw your arms up, surrendering your body to the beat and the music.
You glanced his way, and he was staring, gripping his beer so hard that the vein was visible in his forearm. He raised his brows at you and gave you a knowing look before you slightly turned away.
He was jealous, alright.
You felt a bit guilty for using this sweet guy to make your work crush jealous, but oh well. He couldn’t say he wasn’t having a good time based on the way his hands rested on your hips while you danced. Your discovery made you bold, wanted, and sexy – you felt like a million bucks. You felt his eyes on you the whole time you were moving your body.
After a few songs you settled back at your table and finished your drink before Dan spoke.
“I had a great time with you” he smiled, his hair a bit disheveled from the dancing.
“Me too” you replied and took a sip out of your drink.
“I know this is always like… very awkward, but do you think I can call you sometimes?” he said and let out an awkward chuckle. You smiled at him and nodded before you wrote your number on a napkin for him. “Do you need a ride home?”
“No, thank you. I live pretty close, and I want to say hi to my coworkers before I leave.”
“Sure? I’d feel awful if I’d let you go alone.” Such a gentleman.
“I’m sure, Dan. Have a good night” you said before he stood up, said goodbye and left. You waited a few seconds, finished the rest of your drink and you stood, picking up your purse before you turned and nearly bumped into him.
The scent of his cologne mixed with alcohol filled your nose before you looked up at him. There was an unreadable look on his face, and he clenched his jaw once – twice – before he spoke.
“Fun date?” he asked in a low voice; one you’ve never heard before. You looked over his shoulder to see Beard already left.
“Pretty fun” you replied with a smile and your grip strengthened on your purse. “Did you have a fun evening?” you asked with a devious smile as you remembered the look on his face from before. Your gaze moved to his lips as the corner of his mouth twitched under the moustache. You felt so confident. He clicked his tongue before he spoke.
“Darlin’” he paused and slowly moved his hand to touch your arm, slow enough to leave you space to pull away if you wanted to. But you didn’t want to. His touch was cold against your burning skin, and he grazed his thumb back and forth on your forearm. “Why do you want to break my ol’ heart?” You swallowed hard as the question caught you off guard.
“Do I have such power, coach?” you asked coyly, and he swallowed hard when you called him “coach”. Heat rose in your belly as inappropriate thoughts filled your head with other situations where you could use this information.
His grip tightened on your arm, but only a little, making sure not to hurt you as he stepped closer, which you didn’t think was possible. You felt his breath on your face as you looked into his eyes – his pupils were blown wide as he looked down at you with half hooded eyes. Your heartbeat kicked into overdrive as your gaze darted between his eyes and lips – his sweet, plush lips you wanted to kiss so badly. Bite them lightly.
He didn’t say a word, but he was moving his hand upwards your arm – slowly and softly above your shoulder and he rested his big palm against your neck, his fingertips grazed your scalp.
It wasn’t like him not to speak, but he just couldn’t find the words. You closed your eyes and let out a shaky breath in anticipation, which he took as a clue and closed the gap between you.
His kiss was sweet and gentle, his soft lips grazed yours in slow movements, exploring them like they were the most precious thing in the universe. His free arm moved to the small of your back as he pulled you closer and you felt the heat pool in your abdomen before you bit down onto his lower lip. He let out a low groan and deepened the kiss, his tongue softly grazed your lips, asking for permission which you were more than happy to grant.
Your skin was on fire, and you wrapped your arms around his neck as the kiss turned into something else – passionate, hungry, and needy. His tongue danced in a perfect rhythm with yours, swiping against your lower lip before biting down lightly.
You broke the kiss to get some air, and he rested his forehead on yours as his gorgeous brown eyes bore into your very soul, before you finally spoke.
“I live five minutes from here.”
You kicked off your shoes as you knocked the apartment door closed, your mouth never leaving his. He grabbed your hip with one hand and pushed you flush against the door, leaning on his other hand next to your head as he kissed you with the passion of a starved man.
You gasped under his touch and felt need course through your veins, arousal soaking your underwear with every sloppy kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer, your nails slightly digging into his scalp which earned you a moan from him. It all felt so surreal, and yet the only thing you could focus on was him, his skin under your fingertips, his scent in your nose, his moans in your ear, his taste in your mouth. His hand slowly moved from your hip and grabbed your ass, nudging you to lift your leg, which you happily did and wrapped around his waist. As you pulled him closer with your leg you felt his hard length pressing against you and you gasped.
“Ted,” you whined, throwing your head back against the door.
“Yes, sweetheart?” He murmured into your neck between soft kisses, his breath fanning your skin as his lips traced the curve of your jaw. You let out a shaky breath.
“I need you,” you breathed, and his head moved up so he could look into your eyes. His gaze searched your features for a second before he kissed you again – he devoured you and you didn’t protest.
“You’ll be the end of me,” he groaned as he moved his other hand on your thigh as well and lifted you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist.
“Bedroom’s on the right,” you whispered between kisses as he navigated through your small apartment. He kicked the door closed before he put you onto the bed and climbed on top of you.
You put your hands under his sweatshirt and rested your palms on the hot skin of his stomach for a second before you pulled the piece of clothing off. He was breathtaking, and every passing second you needed him more. It wasn’t that you wanted him anymore. You needed him, and you needed him bad.
Your eyes wandered to his lap, and you saw his erection strain against the fabric of his slacks, and your mouth watered. You couldn’t help it anymore, you reached down and started to palm him through his trousers, making him moan into your skin.
“Fuck, darlin’,” he breathed and started to roll his hips against your palm. You weren’t sure how long you could go on without feeling him.
You unbuttoned his trousers with shaky hands and helped him get rid of them together with his underwear before taking your own clothes off, leaving you bare in front of him. Ted clicked his tongue in amusement before he lowered his head and placed a soft kiss just above your nipple, and you felt another wave of arousal wash over your body.
You slid your hand down his hard member, and he hissed before you wrapped your hand around him and started moving slowly, running your thumb across his sensitive head. He buried his head into your shoulder and groaned loudly as he started to roll his hips against your hand. He was holding his weight with one hand, and he slowly moved the other to cup your breast before he circled his thumb around your nipple.
“Ted, God,” you moaned and he raised his head and bit your lip before he kissed you. His hand slowly moved away from your breast and trailed down your body, leaving goosebumps in its wake before it settled down between your legs. He slid one long finger through your soaked lips, and he groaned.
“Fuck, baby girl. All this for me? Such a good girl,” he said before he pushed his finger into you without any resistance. You whined and bucked your hips against his finger, wanting more. He ran his thumb against your sensitive bud once, then twice, testing your reaction.
His lips moved from your lips to your jawline, to your collarbone, leaving sloppy marks behind them, before he reached your nipple and flattened his tongue against it.
“Ted!” You whined and arched your back off the bed, trying to get even closer to him, but it wasn’t enough. You wanted him inside you. “Ted, please, God.” He swirled his wet tongue against your hardened nipple before he raised his head and looked at you through his lashes.
“What do you want, darlin’? Use that pretty mouth of yours.” Your stomach twisted and you felt yourself clench around his fingers as he was moving them inside you in a steady pace.
“Mmh, you like that, hm?” he asked and placed a soft kiss on your breast again. “You like when I say you’re pretty?” You could only moan as a response and buck your hips against his palm. “How much of a good girl you are? For me?”
“Ted, I’m-,“ you stuttered and your grip on his arm tightened as a familiar knot started to build in your stomach. His fingers moved masterfully inside you, and he curled them ever so slightly just to reach that perfect spot that made you see stars as his thumb drew tight circles around your clit. Your nerves lit up one by one in your body.
“My good girl. Is that what you are?” A moan got caught in your throat as your mouth fell agape, rolling your hips harder against his hand, your body wound up like a bow, ready to release at any second. You couldn’t muster up a proper response, only Ted’s name was falling from your lips repeatedly like a prayer. Ted. Ted. Ted.
“That’s what you are, alright. My best girl. Come for me, darlin’” he whispered into your ears before he planted a sloppy kiss onto your lips and all the sensation was just too much, the bow snapped, and the floodgates opened as you cried out Ted’s name while your orgasm washed over you in crashing waves.
His fingers fucked you through your orgasm, stalling slowly as you came down from your high. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him down into a kiss, biting his bottom lip lightly.
“I need you,” you whispered against his lips, and he groaned as a response, a wide cocky smile spreading on his face.
“Insatiable girl,” he replied, gently caressing your clit to tease you. “Use your words, what does my babygirl need?”
“Fuck, Ted-,” you moaned, squeezing your eyes shut. “I need you inside me, please.”
He let out a load moan and repositioned himself to fully settle between your thighs, aligning his length with your entrance and slowly pushing in inch by inch. Your eyes watered from the sensation, the stretch was heavenly and you could savour every inch of him as he slowly bottomed out.
“Shit, darlin’,” he said in a choked voice. “You feel perfect.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him, wiggling your hips to urge him to finally move inside you, and when he did you swore you could see stars. He pulled himself back a bit then pushed in all the way again, setting a steady rhythm. You moved one of your legs to wrap around his waist, anchoring him closer to you, urging him to move deeper and deeper.
Your high-pitched moans and his noises filled the air of your bedroom, and with each roll of his hips he hit that perfect spot inside you that made you feel like you were in heaven.
“Harder, please,” you managed to get out between his relentless thrusts, and when his eyes met yours, you saw fire burning behind them. He grabbed your leg and pushed it up against your chest, thrusting in you deeper, harder.
“Yeah? Dirty girl,” he panted, picking up his pace while he sucked a mark onto your neck. “Parading around in the bar, grinding on strangers like a little whore,” he whispered against your ear, his hot breath tickling your skin as he fucked you senseless. “Just to get my attention-, to make me jealous.”
“Yes, yes- Ted, my God-,” you moaned, unable to form coherent sentences as his cock hit your sweet spot with every thrust, splitting you in half. You were entangled in each other, your one hand tangling in his hair, the other scratching down his back.
“Do you sit at your desk every day, dreaming of me fucking you on it?” Sweat was beading on Ted’s forehead, his usually neat hair now a mess as he looked down at you with half-lidded eyes. You felt tension build in your body, the molten pit in your stomach growing with every thrust. Your mind was empty, pleasure took over every inch of your body.
“Yes, coach,” you whined and Ted could swear he almost fainted when he heard you say that. He rewarded you with a harsh snap of his hips and another kiss.
“Fuck, darlin’- say that again,” he moaned.
“Coach Lasso, please-,” you said, already breathless, a whimpering mess under him. He groaned and you felt him twitch inside you, his movements becoming sloppy. He moved his hand to draw tight circles on your clit while fucking you into the mattress, and you arched your back away from the bed, squeezing your eyes shut as you tipped over the edge, your muscles tightening up then loosening all at once as you came with Ted’s name falling from your lips.
He wanted to live in that moment forever, seeing you as you came, feeling your body react to him so strongly. The snap of his hips started to stutter and suddenly he pulled out of you – the empty feeling jarring all of a sudden -, and came on your stomach. As you both came down from your highs his eyes wandered up and down your body before he leaned down to kiss you.
“I’m sorry for the mess,” he said, suddenly a bit shy as a faint pink colour danced on his cheeks.
“No need,” you replied and chuckled.
“Bathroom?”
“On the right.”
“I’ll be right back, don’t move,” he said and quickly hurried to the bathroom and returned with a damp towel to help you clean up, before settling down next to you and pulling a blanket over the both of you.
“So, this will make work weird, huh?” You asked jokingly, looking up at him. His features were so soft as he looked down at you, like you were the most precious thing he’s ever seen.
“Or gives us another reason to look forward to it?” He replied and leaned down to kiss you.
You sit on the bench, minding your own business as you wrap the yarn around your fingers.
“Oi, what’re you workin’ on there, grandma?”
The only person to give you such a rude nickname jogs closer to you, leaning down with his arm resting on his knee.
You roll your eyes. “You’re a little shit, Tartt.”
He chuckles with a wide smirk. “What are you workin’ on?” He shrugs, glancing over your project with genuine interest.
Despite what you may think, he genuinely is interested in the things you make and if he’s able to get a little rise out of you, well, that’s a perk.
You hum, “I’m making leg warmers because it’s so fucking cold here. Ted, lied to me about the weather and now I’m the one dealing with the repercussions.”
“Oh, is that it?” He hums, standing up placing his hands on his head as he stretches. “I wouldn’t know how cold it is.”
You scoff, “yeah cause you run hot.”
He turns to you with his hands still on his head. “You think I’m hot?” he smirks.
You roll your eyes. “I did not say that.”
“Nah, nah,” he teases while jogging down the seats towards the field. “You called me hot.” He spins around, still smirking as he jogs backwards.
“I said run hot! As in you- oh forget it,” you mumble. You huff as your loop falls off your crochet hook. "Little prick, making me lose my place."
NOTE: you guys have no idea how quick i wrote this shit. my dick throbbing just from the idea. i love ted.
kinktober masterlist .
WC: 1,6k
WARNING: car sex,, light overstimulation,, very talkative ted,, creampie,, unprotected sex,, handjob (char receiving),, public sex,, light exhibitionism,,
the car ac clicked faintly, warm air pushing against the windows as the glass fogged over inch by inch. the world outside blurred into vague shapes, nothing but streetlights glowing faint through the haze.
ted shifted in the back seat, his legs brushing yours, his breath coming out quicker than usual. he tried to laugh, but it broke halfway, sounding more like a groan.
“i gotta be honest with ya,” he said, voice hushed but still carrying that trademark lilt, “when i pictured endin’ the night with you, i thought maybe a pint, maybe a cheeky kebab, y’know? not—uh—this.” his words cut off with a shaky gasp when your mouth dragged down his neck.
“you complaining?” you murmured, your hand sliding up under his jumper, fingertips pressing into the warm skin of his stomach.
“oh no, no, sir,” he rushed out, his hand grabbing yours like he needed to keep you there. “complainin’s the last thing on my mind. i’m just—ah, jeez—just tryin’ to wrap my head around how we went from talkin’ about practice drills to me sittin’ here prayin’ nobody walks past this car right now.”
you laughed softly against his throat, lips brushing sensitive skin until he shivered. “focus on me. not the car.”
“focus on you,” he repeated, nodding quickly, though his voice cracked when your thumb slid lower. “easy enough. hell, i been tryin’ not to focus on you for weeks, so i reckon my brain’s real happy to have permission now.”
you caught his mouth with yours before he could keep rambling, and he melted instantly, kissing you back with a hunger that stole his breath. he tasted of mint, his mustache tickling at the edges, his lips warm and clumsy but desperate.
his hand slid up to your chest, fingers curling into your shirt, tugging you closer until his back pressed hard against the door. the car gave a faint groan under the movement, the steering wheel brushing your arm as you leaned further over him.
“lord,” he muttered between kisses, breathless, “i should be tellin’ you we ain’t supposed to be doin’ this, but honest to god, my body’s signin’ a petition that says otherwise.”
your hand pushed lower, and his words cut off in a rough exhale, his head tipping back against the headrest.
“holy—okay, yep, that’s—oh boy.” he bit his lip hard, his breath coming out ragged. “you’re—you’re gonna have me hollerin’ loud enough for rebecca to hear from her office, i swear.”
you smirked against his jaw. “then keep it down.”
he laughed, broken and low, his hands clinging to you. “easier said than done when you’re doin’ that—oh god, okay, yep, nope, i can’t—” his voice cracked into a stifled moan, muffled against your shoulder when he buried his face there.
the car felt too small, too hot, every inch of him pressed tight against you. the windows were fully fogged now, droplets of condensation running down the glass, sealing you in.
“you’re—” his voice faltered, and he tried again, panting. “you’re real bad for my self-control, y’know that? i’ve given pep talks to whole teams about stayin’ disciplined, and here i am losin’ every ounce of willpower ‘cause you—oh hell—‘cause you touch me like that.”
your mouth found his again, swallowing the noises he made, his body shuddering beneath your hands. his legs shifted, bracketing you awkwardly in the cramped space, pulling you closer until you could feel every sharp edge of his body pressed against you.
you pressed of your body to his, your hand working his cock way too good. he groaned quietly, his eyes flitting between you two to look at the action. the heat of your mouth, the rhythm of your hand had him gasping, his voice a low string of curses and half-formed words, rambling through them even as his body tensed and bucked under yours.
“oh my god, oh—jesus, i—yeah, yeah—” his voice cracked, his accent slipping heavier, his sentences falling apart until all that was left were small, helpless sounds. the fogged-up car rocked faintly with the motion, every noise inside amplified in the tight space—the squeak of leather seats, the sharp hitch of his breath, the messy, desperate sounds spilling from his throat no matter how hard he tried to bite them back.
when he finally came, he clutched at you like he might fall apart otherwise, his breath ragged, body trembling, forehead pressed against your collarbone.
for a long moment, the only sound was the hum of the ac and his uneven breathing. the air was thick, heavy, the car warm and damp with heat.
ted let out a shaky laugh, muffled against your shirt. “well,” he rasped, still catching his breath, “that’s one heck of a halftime show. don’t suppose you’re takin’ requests for an encore, are ya?”
he tipped his head back then, hair mussed, cheeks flushed, lips red from kissing. he looked at you with a grin that was both dazed and tender, his chest still rising and falling too fast.
“y’know,” he added, his voice softening, “i think i might be gettin’ spoiled here. and i don’t even care.”
——————————
the leather was creaking under both your weight. ted straddled your lap, knees pressed awkwardly against the backrest, his hands gripping your shoulders like he wasn’t sure if he was steadying himself or just holding on for dear life.
his mustache tickled against your cheek as he tried to kiss you and gasp out words at the same time, his voice spilling in that familiar drawl, quicker and messier now.
“lord have mercy—okay, okay—i swear i don’t usually climb into anybody’s lap like this, not unless we’re on one of those mechanical bulls down in texas—and even then i wasn’t half as nervous as i am right now—oh jesus—” his words cut off in a strangled gasp when your hands gripped his hips, guiding him to take your cock deeper.
you rocked him down into you, slow at first, then harder, and his rambling shattered into a moan so loud he clapped his own hand over his mouth, eyes wide and desperate.
“oh my god,” he whined against his palm, “okay, okay, nope, can’t—don’t know if i can—mfff—”
you pulled his hand away, made him look at you, made him feel everything.
“look at me,” you murmured, and he did, eyes glassy, lips parted, trembling in your hold as you guided him by his hips, making him bounce you.
“i’m—oh god, i’m lookin’, i’m lookin’, don’t worry,” he babbled, voice breaking, “just, uh—yep, yep, definitely seein’ stars here, partner, and i ain’t talkin’ about the kind you pin on a sheriff’s chest—jesus—feels so-mhhhgggh, feels too good, too much—”
his hands slid uselessly against your chest, then your shoulders, clutching and releasing like he couldn’t decide what to do. you moved him with steady strength, your control absolute, and he broke apart under it.
the car rocked gently with the rhythm, windows dripping with condensation now, the small space filled with the sounds he couldn’t keep in—ragged gasps, strangled curses, helpless little moans spilling past every half-finished joke.
“don’t stop, don’t—jesus lord, i mean it, don’t—don’t stop—if you stop i’ll—i’ll just, i dunno, combust or somethin’—turn right into a puff of confetti like one of them birthday cannons—jesus, jesus, jesus—”
you shifted the angle, pressed him down onto you harder, and the noise he made was so raw it made your own restraint snap. his words blurred, tumbling over each other until he was babbling nonsense, too far gone to make sense of anything except the way you kept driving him over and over, holding him exactly where you wanted him.
his forehead dropped to your shoulder, his voice cracking into laughter and sobs all at once, wrecked and overwhelmed. “ohh my god—ah—can’t—can’t take it, but i don’t—don’t want it to stop, please, please, don’t—”
and you didn’t. you kept him moving until he broke apart completely, clinging to you, babbling incoherent words into your neck as the car groaned and the windows blurred everything else away. when he came, he came with utterly no warning, his breath catching on a strangled gasp, uselessly shaking his head against you. the moment you realized what had happened, your cock throbbed inside ted. this guy..
instead of guiding his hips, making him move, you dragged him down until your were balls deep, his ass flush against your pelvis. you rolled your hips in a certain way that made ted’s body twitch in your hold, his hole tightening around you.
it was then that you took over and fucked him nice and deep, muttering praises into ted’s ear to keep him distracted from the overstimulation that came with you continuing after he came. of course, he wouldn’t have complained, never—too much of a people pleaser to do that. but, his hands clenched at anything, any part of your body that he could reach.
because ted was impervious as hell, because he was extremely hot like this, rambling incoherent stuff, his voice slurred, accent more prominent, his words drawn out, breaking mid-way, because he clutched at you like you were the only one anchoring him, it didn’t take a while for you to spill your cum inside him. ted moaned softly, his voice just slightly hoarse as he felt your cock throb and twitch.
when it finally eased, his body went limp against yours, chest heaving, his breath hot and wet against your collar. after a long silence, he let out a shaky laugh. “...well. if i weren’t a god-fearin’ man before, i’d sure as hell be prayin’ now.”
he tipped his head up just enough to grin at you, hair stuck damp to his forehead, lips swollen, eyes still glassy. “you—you got me ridin’ you like a rodeo clown out here. reckon i’m never gonna sit in this seat again without blushin’.”
description: in which he's at work late again, so she goes to see if she can persuade him to give up for the night and come home
pairing: ted lasso x female!reader
warnings: swearing, no use of y/n, established relationship, smut (oral f! receiving, unprotected p in v, kinda voyeurism?, kinda public sex?)
masterlist (one, two, three)
When the sky started to get dark and you still hadn't heard from Ted, you knew exactly where he was.
You knew the club wouldn't be locked up yet since there were a few custodians working late, plus Ted, so you walked on in. It was eerily quiet when everyone was gone home, especially in the locker room. The lights were off and it was completely still, which felt wrong. You were used to the loud, rambunctiousness of the Greyhounds players filling this room.
A light came from the coaches office. As you expected, Ted was in there, stood at the whiteboard, scribbling something down. He was so focused he didn't even hear you open the door and step into the office. You were amused at how focused he was on what he was doing. After waiting a few moments, waiting to see if he was going to turn around and notice you there, you rapped your knuckles against the door frame, loudly knocking to catch his attention.
Ted jumped and turned to you. He smiled sheepishly at you. "Hey, baby. What are you doin' here?"
"I figured you were working late," you said. "So I came down to look for you."
He rubbed his eyes. You noticed there were dark bags starting to form under his eyes. It wasn't the first night he had been working late, and you knew that. "I'm sorry if I had you worried."
"I wasn't worried, per say. I was hoping I could convince you to come home."
Ted sighed and ran his hands through his hair, messing it up slightly. "I know I should come home. I am damn tired and my eyes are gettin' all crossed from lookin' at this whiteboard. But, we have an important game tomorrow and there's just somethin' we're missin' that I'm tryin' to figure out before we play."
You crossed the room and sat up on Ted's desk. "Do you think looking at it for so long might be making it harder to figure out the issue?"
He nodded. "That's exactly what I'm thinkin'."
Ted slumped down into his chair. He reached for you, and you knew exactly what he wanted. You slipped off the desk and onto his lap. Ted wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his head in the crook of your neck. You ran your hands through his hair in the way you knew soothed him. You knew Ted loved his job, and he loved his team. Even when he was still learning about English football and how it worked, he was trying his best to do good by his players and by Rebecca as the club owner. And you knew that love would make him work himself to death if it meant helping the team play the best they can and getting the win.
You were looking at the whiteboard, at Ted's various scribbles, and absentmindedly playing with his hair. You weren't really thinking about your actions until you shifted on his lap and he let out a grunt in response. It was a familiar sound - not one of annoyance or momentary harm, but of lust that he was trying to push down. Shortly after the noise, you felt something poking your butt through his track pants.
You smirked to yourself. An idea was forming in your head.
You lowered your head to Ted's neck. You started to place feather light kisses over his neck. He moved his head, allowing you more access to him. His breathing was turning to light pants as the bulge pressing against you grew.
"Maybe we can find some way to get you to de-stress," you purred in his ear.
He squirmed beneath you, which told you your plan was working. Suddenly, Ted grabbed hold of your hips and spun you on his lap so you were facing him. He draped your legs on either side of him, letting them hang through the loops of the arm rests. In this position, your core was pressing against his bulge. You gasped, but he pressed his lips to yours, swallowing the noise. He kissed you hungrily, like a man who had been starved for days. He cupped your face gently, a stark contrast to the way his lips were pressing against you, the way he was grinding himself against you. Ted had this way of losing himself to passion during intimate moments, but still managing to be his gentle, goofy self at the same time. It was one of many things you loved about Ted; that he was always so unapologetically Ted.
He slipped his tongue past your lips, one hand moving from your face to wrap around your lower back. He pulled you against him, pressing his erection harder against you. You whimpered against his mouth. Heat was igniting between your legs.
Ted stood from his chair, locking your legs around his waist. Ted kept his desk pretty organized anyways, but he still pushed whatever was there onto the floor so he could lay you down on it. He broke away from the kiss to look down at you. His hair was a mess from your fingers running through it, and his brown eyes were full of lust. He reached for your pants, but waited for your permission before he pulled them off. You had just barley nodded when he was roughly pulling them off you, exposing your lower half to the cool air conditioned room.
You realized them what you were doing, or rather where you were doing it. You sat up quickly, catching Ted's attention. "Ted, wait. We can't."
He suddenly looked concerned. "Are you alright? I didn't hurt you, did I?"
You shook your head, but couldn't help the giggle that bubbled up in your throat. Your dear, sweet Ted. On the verge of fucking you senseless and still so kind. "No, but Ted, we're in your office. We can't have sex here. What if someone catches us?"
"There's no one here," he assured you.
"The custodians - "
"Have already done their final checks in here and in the locker room." His hands found their way to your hips, fingers tracing circles into your bare skin. "If you wanna stop, I'll wait till we get home. But you got me so worked up, sweetheart. I need you as soon as possible. And besides, I'd be lyin' if I said the idea of taking you right here on my desk didn't excite the Hell out of me. All the time I spend in this office, I could have a really good memory to think about during those times."
The thought was turning you on, too. All the coaching meetings, Diamond Dog meetings, whatever other work he did in his office. He'd be there, remembering having you on his desk, writhing in pleasure beneath him, and no one else would ever be the wiser. It'd be your and Ted's little secret. The thought made the pool between your thighs grow.
You shifted, pressing your thighs together to create some friction. Seeing what reaction you had to his words gave Ted his answer. He kissed you again, his hands moving to gently open your thighs. His fingers hooked into the waistband of your panties. You lifted yourself so he could pull them off you. As he pulled them down your legs, leaving you completely bare to him, he lowered himself to his knees in front of you.
He kissed your inner thighs, trailing to the spot you needed him most. He didn't tease you, luckily, and dove into your pussy. His tongue lapped ruthlessly at your clit, his mustache leaving a familiar burn in its wake as it brushed over your sensitive skin. You were wrong earlier, this was actually a man starved. He ate you out like it was his job, like he wouldn't survive if he didn't. Ted took great pleasure in giving you great pleasure, and he was very good at it. Your knuckles were white as you gripped the edge of Ted's desk. He suctioned his lips around your clit and swirled his tongue around the bundle of nerves. You moaned so loudly you would've been worried about a custodian hearing you if you weren't so lost in Ted's tongue.
Your hips inadvertently moved, grinding against his face. Ted's grip on your hips loosened, allowing you to move freely. One hand found its way to Ted's hair, holding him in place as you started to grind against his tongue. Ted's hand found your free one and laced your fingers together. He looked up and watched you in awe as you basically rode his face. Your head was thrown back, mouth agape as moans and whimpers tumbled from your lips. The harsh florescent lights of the office made you look like an angel in his eyes. Although, you always looked like an angel in Ted's eyes, especially in these moments of bliss.
"F-Fuck," you moaned. "I'm so close."
Ted took this opportunity to take control again. He took hold of your hips to keep you still again and lapped at your pussy until you were sent over the edge. You called his name so loud you were sure you could hear it echoing off the walls of the club. Your body turned to jelly very fast. You almost slumped over, but Ted stood quickly enough to catch you. He kissed you again, the taste of you still on his lips.
You slipped your hand underneath the waistbands of his track pants. You cupped his hard cock, straining against his underwear, desperate to be freed. You stroked him through the fabric, reveling in the moans he was making against your lips.
"I need you, sweetheart," he breathed. "If I don't have you soon I might make a mess in my boxers."
You giggled and kissed his lips. You made quick work of pulling down his pants and boxers just enough for his cock to spring free. He took himself in his hand, pumping a few times before lining up with your entrance. He swiped the head through your slick a few times before he pushed himself into you. You clutched his shoulders as he bottomed out. His eyes fluttered shut as he took in the feeling of your warm, wet pussy wrapping around him.
His thrusts were slow at first. Pulling almost all the way out so he could push himself all the way back in again. You could feel every inch of him, dragging in and out, in and out. You both moaned together, your sounds of pleasuring drowning out the general sounds of the club.
Soon, his want took over his desire to make this last, and Ted started speeding up his thrusts. He whispered praises into your ear as he fucked you so vigorously that the desk was shaking. You were worried the desk may fall apart beneath you - it had happened once to your old bed after Ted had come back from a week away with the team - but your brain couldn't form the words to voice that concern. You were too focused on the feeling of his cock abusing your g-spot with every thrust in.
"I'm not goin' to last long, sweetheart," Ted said. "You think you can cum on my cock for me?"
You nodded, your walls pulsing at the question alone. Ted reached down between your bodies to get to your clit. He rubbed messy circles, his thrusts becoming just as sloppy as he was nearing his climax. The pressure started to build again, and before you knew it, you were cumming again. Ted's climax came shortly after yours. He pressed a bruising kiss to your lips as he filled you.
You leaned against each other for support. Your body was definitely jelly now, and you could tell Ted felt the same way. His eyes were closed, a sheepish smile on his face. You could tell he was close to giving into his fatigue. You cupped his face, and he opened his eyes again. "Let's get you home."
He pulled out of you and tucked himself back into his pants. He handed you your pants and panties so you could dress yourself too. Ted picked up his stuff from the floor and haphazardly threw it back onto his desk.
"I'll fix it tomorrow," he decided.
"What are you going to tell everyone if they ask?"
He shrugged. "I'll think of that when I'm less tired."
You giggled and kissed his cheek. Ted turned out the lights in the office and locked it up. He put his arm around you as you both left the club.
"At least now I know how to drag you away from late nights in the office," you teased.
Ted chuckled. "Darling, you can come have sex in my office with me anytime. As long as no one else is around, of course."
"Oh, duh. I don't need anyone watching me have sex."
~~~~~~
A few days later, Keeley and Rebecca had invited you out for a girl's lunch. It had been a while since you spent any time together just the three of you, so you were itching for some girl time.
The two of them were already at the restaurant when you arrived. Keeley was out of her seat first, wrapping you in a tight hug before instructing you to sit in the booth next to her. Rebecca squeezed your hand, promising a hug once Keeley freed you from the booth again. They had already ordered a bottle of wine for the table and had a glass waiting for you. By the time your food came, Rebecca was pouring the last remnants of the bottle into your glass.
"Oh!" she said. "I forgot to tell you what I saw on the security cameras the other day."
"God, I hope it wasn't another accidental glimpse at the showers," Keeley said, screwing up her face. "You really need to get that creepy camera taken down before it randomly reactivates again."
"Oh, luckily we got rid of that long ago," Rebecca said, waving away Keeley's concern. "You both know we rarely watch the cameras unless something suspicious comes up. Like, say, the camera catches movement after hours." You and Keeley nodded. "Well, I noticed a few days ago, before the game, there was detection of movement in the locker room area for a long period of time. Obviously, I looked into it, in case it was tampering from the rival team, but it was Ted."
Keeley's shoulders slumped. "Well, that's boring. Of course Ted was there, he works late so often."
Rebecca was watching you as you raised your glass to take another sip. "Oh, he was working alright. But he wasn't alone."
It took you a moment to put two and two together. When you did, you ended up spitting your wine back out into your glass. Keeley looked between you and Rebecca, still confused. Her face lit up as she finally put the pieces together, and then both Keeley and Rebecca started laughing as you sunk down in your seat. You wished you could completely disappear into your seat, or at least order a stronger drink for yourself.
Rebecca reached across the table to take your hand again. "Don't worry. I wiped the video from the security history. Next time, although I'm very much not encouraging a next time, make sure Ted covers the security cameras."
In response, you swallowed the contents of your wine glass and flagged down your server to order something stronger.
