Another discord drabble - thank you @elder-millennial-trash @second-sister @impishtubist @carlav-blogs @theresthesnitch and @siriuslythatbitch for the ideas (which I have shamelessly ripped off!)
‘Shhh, shhh, he’s coming!’
‘He looks so good in that green, doesn’t he?’
‘Oh my God, Jenny! Can you shut up? He’ll hear you!’
‘Can you please be quiet! Some of us are trying to work here!’
Remus snorted. ‘Pads. I haven’t seen you open one book since we got here. Two hours ago.’
‘I have been ruminating on a number of issues.’ Sirius said, with his usual air of superiority. He threw another dirty glare at the group of girls sitting at the next table. ‘Who are they fawning over anyway?’
‘Wait for it…’ James muttered under his breath and Remus grinned.
Sirius looked between the two of them. ‘What? Wait for- oh you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!’
‘Ye-P.’ Remus nodded at Sirius and then looked up at Regulus. ‘Hey Reg.’
‘Hello Remus. Are you ready?’
‘Nearly. Do you want to find a table by the window and I’ll just finish up here?’
‘Regulus?!’ Sirius spluttered, looking outraged.
‘I don’t know why you’re so surprised, Padfoot.’ James looked Regulus up and down. ‘Looking fiiiine today, Baby Black.’
Regulus just looked at him with contempt.
James gave him a salute and then a cheeky wink. Regulus just rolled his eyes and walked off without a backwards glance.
‘Gah!’ Sirius choked out. ‘Prongs!’
‘What?’ James looked unrepentant. ‘Reg is fit. I definitely wouldn’t say no to him getting a hold of my broom if you know what I mean…’
‘…wanting him to mount it…’
‘Oh absolutely. You don’t want him sliding off the end.’
‘Moony! Oh my God, what is happening?!’
‘He’s so dark and mysterious!’
Sirius whipped around to locate the culprit who had just spoken.
‘Oi!’ he whispered yelled at the group of girls who were giggling as they watched Regulus walk away. ‘Really?’
‘Oh yeh.’ One girl answered cheerfully, ‘All the sixth years think he’s gorgeous.’
‘But- but,’ Sirius seemed almost lost for words. ‘But we’re nearly identical!’
The girl shrugged and another piped up. ‘Yeh, but he’s just got this whole silent and brooding thing going on.’
‘A certain je ne sais quoi.’ Her friend added and they all nodded in agreement.
‘Humph.’ Sirius turned back to James and Remus, pouting. ‘We’re basically the same.’
‘You talk too much,’ Remus said offhand, ‘That’s why they like him better.’
‘I do not talk too-‘ Sirius stopped in a huff. ‘At least I’m funny!’
‘Eh.’ Remus tilted his head with a slight grimace. ‘Are you though? I mean Reg has got this dry sense of humour that just makes you want to-‘
‘I have more muscles.’ Sirius interrupted, ‘Reg looks like a limp noodle.’
‘Yeh but it’s all about those lean muscles these days.’ Remus rested his chin on his hands, ‘I mean I wouldn’t like to say but at a guess I reckon that under that green jumper of his Reg is pretty bloody-‘
‘I WEAR COOLER CLOTHES!’ Sirius half yelled, sounding increasingly desperate. He cleared his throat, running his fingers through his hair. ‘I wear cooler clothes.’
Remus gave him an unimpressed look. ‘Leather is out Sirius. Nobody likes real leather these days.’
‘But- I- Oh.’ Sirius seemed to deflate. ‘Ok.’
‘Right!’ Remus got to his feet wiping his hands on his robes and shot a charm at his hair, which flattened itself slightly. ‘How do I look?’
‘What? Wait! Remus,’ Sirius reached up and grabbed the Remus’ sleeve, ‘You have a crush on Regulus too?’
‘Noooo,’ Remus looked back over his shoulder in the direction Regulus had wandered, ‘Why would you think that?’
‘Because he’s drop dead gorgeous, that’s why.’ James chimed in.
‘And on that note,’ Remus gently removed Sirius’ hand, ‘I’ll see you losers later. I’ve got books to find in the stacks. If you know what I mean.’
‘I don’t know what that means!’ Sirius said, now sounding slightly hysterical. ‘Remus! What does that mean?’
But Remus had already turned away and was sashaying towards the back on the library, chest puffed out and his hips swinging.
‘Prongs.’ Sirius turned to James, who was biting the insides of his cheeks, his lips twitching upwards. ‘What’s happening? Moony- he- James!’
James schooled his face into something akin to sympathy. ‘Never mind mate.’ He patted Sirius’ hand. ‘There’s plenty more fish in the sea.’
‘Good Lord Padfoot,’ James said an hour or so later, nudging Sirius who had been jiggling a leg violently for the past ten minutes and making the table shake. ‘Can you stop?!’
‘What do you think they’re doing?’ Sirius pushed his chair back and jammed his quill into his mouth, chewing on the end.
James sighed and reached over, extracting the now soggy feather from Sirius’ mouth. ‘I don’t know. Studying?’
‘Potions, probably. You know Rem is shit at potions.’
‘But why is Regulus helping him? I could help him!’
‘There you go then.’ James passed Sirius a sugar quill to suck on. ‘Maybe if you’d-‘
‘Shhhh!’ Sirius shoved James hard in the ribs and grabbed the nearest book, ‘They’re coming.’
James rolled his eyes. ‘Hey Hot Stuff!’ he hollered, ‘And Reg,’ he added, snorting to himself.
‘You really are an imbecile, aren’t you Potter,’ Regulus said as he approached the table, followed by Remus.
‘Why’s your hair like that?!’ Sirius demanded, pointing at Remus’ hair, which was definitely looking more dishevelled than it had done an hour ago. ‘And where’s your tie gone?’
‘Oops,’ Remus gave an uncharacteristic giggle, patting his hair down and then reached across to pull his tie out of Regulus’ back pocket.
Sirius blanched. ‘Wait. You didn’t actually kiss Regulus, right?’
‘I’m starving.’ Remus said, ignoring Sirius entirely, ‘I think I’ll go and see if the House Elves can make me some tea.’
‘Remus! Don’t walk away from me!’ But it was too late, Remus had turned the corner and disappeared from sight.
‘Regulus. Please.’ Sirius looked up at him frantically.
Regulus gave him a calculating look. ‘Are you actually planning on doing anything about it?’
‘Don’t be a prat, Sirius. Are you going to actually tell him?’
‘Oh my God. You kissed him, didn’t you!’
‘No!’ Regulus looked affronted. ‘But I will if you don’t sort your shit out and tell him how you feel.’
‘But- but- he’s got a crush on you!’
Regulus snorted and James let out a loud hoot of laughter. ‘You really are an idiot. Why do you think he’s doing all of this?’
‘Wait for it…’ James said, for the second time that day.
‘Oh. Oh! Fuck!’ Sirius scrambled to his feet, crashing into Regulus and knocking the books balanced in his hands to the floor.
‘There we go!’ James said. ‘It’s taken you long enough, Padfoot. He’s been mad for you for ages.’
‘Shit. Sorry Reg.’ Sirius bent down and began to help Regulus pick up the books.
‘What are you still doing here?! Go! Go!’
‘Right!’ Sirius straightened up, his body vibrating with nervous energy. ‘I’m going! Off I go. To tell Remus that I want to-‘
‘Go!’ Both James and Regulus shouted.
‘Yes!’ Sirius turned in a full circle, like a dog chasing his tail. And then spun on his heel just as Regulus bent down to pick up the last of the books.
‘See you in a- Oh my God!’
‘What?’ Regulus asked, looking up at him from where he was bent double.
Sirius looked at him and then at James. ‘Is that- why are you wearing James’ underwear?!’
‘Ah,’ James said, an apologetic look on his face. ‘Sirius. Padfoot. My bestest pal. About that…’
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