Getting your ass kicked is important.
I mean this both figuratively and literally. I have been kicked in the head, punched in the face, and come off second best in spars that probably went a bit further than just spars. I have also found myself on the losing side in intellectual endeavours where I gave my absolute all, did nothing wrong, and still came off second best.
And I think I'm better off for having gone through those experiences.
As a people watcher, former tutor, former childcare worker, and former university lecturer, I have seen all the different ways that people respond to losing. I firmly believe that losing when you're younger is an important part of learning how to handle losing, so that you do not just crumble when you're older.
I have seen many people who are used to winning, so used to winning that by the time they get to university they don't even know what losing feels like. Almost all of them struggled bitterly when they lost or came up against a challenge they simply weren't able to meet. They simply hadn't built up the same resilience that people who've lost before have.
I firmly believe this is why so many high achievers in high school struggle in university. Compared to the challenges offered by university, high school tends to be easier and less competitive. In many cases, there is always an answer, one that you can reach if you study and work hard enough.
However, when it comes to actual research, the sort you will have to conduct as an Honours, Masters, or PhD student - to say nothing of the work you'll have to carry out as a postgraduate or in the workplace - there may not be a right answer. Indeed, in the real world, you can do everything right, make all the correct moves, and still lose. That is simply how the world is.
Learning to handle failure is particularly important in creative disciplines. Let me tell you this right now. If you're going to be a writer, you will fail.
Because failing tells you what you're doing wrong. Failing lets you know when you're on the wrong track. Failing is how you can tell that what you're doing isn't right.
It's all right to fail because each of those failures gets you that much closer to success. Believe me, I know. I've been there.
Don't ever be ashamed of failing if you gave it everything you have. There's nothing to be ashamed of. It's easy to mock those who fail, but there are so many who lack the courage to even try or who give up the minute things get hard.
It's telling, I think, that the greatest people aren't usually considered great because they never faced adversity but because they found a way to keep going despite that adversity.
Failing sucks. It hurts. But in the end, people don't remember how many times you failed. They remember how many times you managed to win. If a writer fails a thousand times but writes a single masterpiece, they will absolutely be remembered for that masterpiece, and not all the drafts that never quite made it or all the ideas that never saw the light of day.
Don't be afraid of failure. Otherwise, you will never be able to succeed.
annaxmalina
areudirty
ellievsbear
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind