ричард

no love. no future. do you feel me darling?

[rchrdrvr]

im gonna bring back posting some interesting music. gonna show some of my drawings and zines ive done over the 6 years ive been fully gone. lots of dark bar scrawls all fueled by my deliberate and (mostly) consciousthe hedonistic pursuits in life.

small poet

smaller artist

big weirdo

look forward to posting, frel free to interact. u can cyber bully me, i play league of legends. im a teemo main. there is no god but im gonna hit diamond in that game so my dog ned looks up to me and can be as proud of me as i imagine he’d be when i get there.

i do live in a log cabin with terrible fucking internet tho.

i miss south dakota, but the mojave desert is better for lizards.

rats.

spiders.

people who are cold.

love u.

[rchrdrvr]

Sadness set in around sunset

Uninvited yes,

But it's all in how you handle it

I've seen better days

But I'm trying to mend

The candle can only burn

At both ends for so long

Dead weight is pulling me under

Sink or swim

I dig the grave I've been living in

When I lived through hell

I found there's far worse things than death

What if I'm waiting for a peace that I can't have?

What if they're right and I pushed that grace out of grasp?

The silence is deafening

The misery is setting in

I fear that I'm just making waves

To keep from drowning in unhappiness

The silence is deafening

The misery is setting in

I fear myself sinking again

Suffer to survive

The grass was never green on either side

I think of nothing but I,

And focus only on the shadows when the sun shines

Growing up,

I found out nothing was good enough

I'll fight my way to the surface or bust

Under the weight of hopelessness, feeling crushed

Can't give in to giving up

This world showed me no love

I bit the bullet and toughened up

They'll give you nothing

Their words are vacant

This life is what you make it

[rchrdrvr]

when i was a kid and we had vocabulary words where we had to write each one in a sentence and i didnt have the internet and if my parents didnt know wtf the word meant either i would just write, “i dont know what [vocabulary word] means.” some teachers marked it wrong, some marked it right, some did both over time... i dont know if this has any lasting impact on a person.

just something i thought about.

[rchrdrvr]

Lay your head where my heart used to be Hold the earth above me Lay down in the green grass Remember when you loved me

Come closer don’t be shy Stand beneath a rainy sky The moon is over the rise Think of me as a train goes by

Clear the thistles and brambles Whistle ‘Didn’t He Ramble’ Now there’s a bubble of me And it’s floating in thee

Stand in the shade of me Things are now made of me The weather vane will say… It smells like rain today

God took the stars and he tossed 'em Can’t tell the birds from the blossoms You’ll never be free of me He’ll make a tree from me

Don’t say good bye to me Describe the sky to me And if the sky falls, mark my words We’ll catch mocking birds

Lay your head where my heart used to be Hold the earth above me Lay down in the green grass Remember when you loved me

[micahulrichdraws]

Queen.

[micahulrichdraws]

A forest full of friends.

[rchrdrvr]

Oh sweet Anna did you mean to do this to me I’ve been trying hard to be rational What a woman, what a woe that you give to me How long can I count to a thousand I tried drinking but the bottle is still empty I can only hope for a fresh one You tried loving but I guess you could not love me How long can you count to a thousand I could be a bigger man, bigger man. Yeah I could be a bigger man, bigger man. But I just want to kill a man kill a man. Really what’s a bigger man? Oh young sailor do see you what your captain sees? Love is nothing more than an action What an ocean, what a world, on the big blue seas You can change it all if you want to My good leader what a self loving web you weave I have got a son and a daughter My young sailor what a point that you just can’t see Don’t you think that they need a father So pull yourself together man, smaller man And do it for the bigger man, bigger man How easy it would be if we could see the plan But really what’s a plan?

[rchrdrvr]

“The Mariner’s Revenge Song”

We are two mariners Our ship’s sole survivors In this belly of a whale It’s ribs are ceiling beams It’s guts are carpeting I guess we have some time to kill You may not remember me I was a child of three And you, a lad of eighteen But, I remember you And I will relate to you How our histories interweave At the time you were A rake and a roustabout Spending all your money On the whores and hounds (oh, oh) You had a charming air All cheap and debonair My widowed mother found so sweet And so she took you in Her sheets still warm with him Now filled with filth and foul disease As time wore on you proved A debt-ridden drunken mess Leaving my mother A poor consumptive wretch (oh, oh) And then you disappeared Your gambling arrears The only thing you left behind And then the magistrate Reclaimed our small estate And my poor mother lost her mind Then, one day in spring My dear sweet mother died But, before she did I took her hand as she, dying, cried: (oh, oh) “Find him, Bind him Tie him to a pole and break His fingers to splinters Drag him to a hole until he Wakes up naked Clawing at the ceiling Of his grave” It took me fifteen years To swallow all my tears Among the urchins in the street Until a priory Took pity and hired me To keep their vestry nice and neat But, never once in the employ Of these holy men Did I ever, once turn my mind From the thought of revenge (oh, oh) One night I overheard The prior exchanging words With a penitent whaler from the sea The captain of his ship Who matched you toe to tip Was known for wanton cruelty The following day I shipped to sea With a privateer And in the whistle Of the wind I could almost hear (oh, oh) “Find him, Bind him Tie him to a pole and break His fingers to splinters Drag him to a hole until he Wakes up naked Clawing at the ceiling Of his grave There is one thing I must say to you As you sail across the sea Always, your mother will watch over you As you avenge this wicked deed” And then, that fateful night We had you in our sight After twenty months at sea Your starboard flank abeam I was getting my muskets clean When came this rumbling from beneath The ocean shook The sky went black And the captain quailed And before us grew The angry jaws Of a giant whale (oh..) Don’t know how I survived The crew all was chewed alive I must have slipped between his teeth But, oh, what providence What divine intelligence That you should survive As well as me It gives my heart great joy To see your eyes fill with fear So lean in close And I will whisper The last words you’ll hear (oh, oh)

[catonaporch-deactivated20210713]

I wish there was magic in the way  I move from town to town  I’d cast a spell on your broken heart  But I’m better left unfound  I’m better left unfound 

[idontreallyexistrightnow-blog]

we have this available on tape/cd here they have super cool handmade cds available here

don’t fuck up, get into this album

[rchrdrvr]

Snak the Ripper - Forgotten Yeah this lifes a trip, You can go from ain’t having shit, Only to take your spot when you slip, Shave some hundos off of you not, Homie watching you pick. To keep your company, ‘cuz nobody want to work, But everybody wanna’ live their lifes comfortably. They all dreamin’ of the finer things, Designer clothes and diamond rings, Won’t last long, like the kind of pleasure a vagina brings. Gotta’ stick to your own homie, Watch for your dictions, Sick with no home somewhere lost in the distance. You can get what you want, Just practice persistance, You’re the only person in controlling your existance. So make every minute count, When They say you won’t amount, Show 'em what you’re all about. Forget about your sorrow 'cuz, Everything you have right now could be all gone tomorow 'cuz Changes come time moves on, The clock is never stoppin’ Don’t pay attention to the bullshit these people talkin’ One day you’re on top but then suddenly your shit ain’t poppin’ People love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten. Changes come time moves on, The clock is never stoppin’ Don’t pay attention to the bullshit these people talkin’ One day you’re on top but then suddenly your shit ain’t poppin’ People love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten. It’s when you’re goin’ through hurts, Concentrate on nothin’, Soak up the beat and the verse, Always check your shoulder homie you can’t see in reverse. Remeber money comes and goes, So even when the funds are low, Try to keep above the surface, Fightin’ with the undertoe. Why you find that hard to believe? You get your arm broken trying to wear your heart on your sleave. Don’t make your decisions only based on emotions, Keep your mouth shut homie, And your ears wide open. Trying to make a positive impression, Life’s a prize that lies in your possession. Aggression is a sign of the weak, Jealousy the same listen to the words that I speak. People change, turn quick to burn you with the stake, I just wrote this shit, So maybe you could learn from my mistakes man. Changes come time moves on, The clock is never stoppin’ Don’t pay attention to the bullshit these people talkin’ One day you’re on top but then suddenly your shit ain’t poppin’ People love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten. Changes come time moves on, The clock is never stoppin’ Don’t pay attention to the bullshit these people talkin’ One day you’re on top but then suddenly your shit ain’t poppin’ People love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten. I say people love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten, I say people love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten, I say people love you one day but by sunday you’re forgotten I say people love you one day …

[trackville]

Visit Original Link

you wouldn’t be laughing // the front bottoms

stop saying hi to all of your old friends learn to survive on only the new trends

[rchrdrvr]

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you; Please don’t take my sunshine away The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken So I hung my head and I cried. I’ll always love you, and make you happy, If you will only say the same. But if you leave me to love another, You’ll regret it all some day: You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you Please don’t take my sunshine away In my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me When I awake my poor heart pains So when you come back, and make me happy I’ll forgive you dear, I’ll take the blame  You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you Please don’t take my sunshine away

[idontreallyexistrightnow-blog]

Juxtapose (This is Indeed A Love Song) 

This is not another message 

to the proverbial you 

Cause I’ve exhausted every word 

and every way to say “I love you.” 

So Brand New will speak for us 

It’s been months since I’ve smiled 

I blame all of those clouds in the sky 

This is goodbye 

What’s worse is you’re not the worst of my problems 

I’m choking cause I’ve got your smoke in my lungs 

I’m sighing cause I’ve got that song in my head 

I’m screaming a capella cause you’ve got my guitar 

Pyromania like I’m burning these loose threads 

Speak with more than words, 

I wish whatever you were talking with 

Would just shut up 

Speak with more than words 

Oh whatever helps you sleep at night 

Should really speak up 

This is just another message 

To the proverbial you 

Cause I’ve exhausted every way 

Yeah, every way to stop my thoughts of you 

So skip this track as I look back 

On those months when I smiled 

As the sun’s beating down on my head 

Let’s to go bed 

What needs to be done can wait til tomorrow 

I’m choking cause I’ve got your smoke in my lungs 

I’m sighing cause I’ve got that song in my head 

I’m screaming a capella cause you’ve got my guitar 

Pyromania like I’m burning these loose threads 

Speak with more than words, 

I wish whatever you were talking with 

Would just shut up 

Speak with more than words 

Oh whatever helps you sleep at night 

Should really speak up 

I’m quiet cause I know I shouldn’t say it 

Sorry if I babble just to compensate 

This veteran of sleepless nights know what to expect: 

That “love is only found between a man and his cigarette…” 

Well I don’t think that’s true 

I’m upset that I’m not upset 

I want you like a Friday 

But Monday I’ll have regrets 

I want you like I Friday 

But Monday I’ll have regrets 

I want you like a Friday 

But Monday I’ll have regrets

[idontreallyexistrightnow-blog]

Well if I tried I could be an alcoholic 

but I’m just too lazy to pick up a bottle and run with it 

Because I just can’t stand to change my daily routine 

and the only girls who give me the time of day 

are far too young to realize the horrible mistake they’ve made 

I’m the horrible mistake they make 

Self-deprecation is my favorite past-time after time it just gets more mutilated inside of my chest but at best I can still wake up every morning and do it all over again, all over again. 

This isn’t a song about how much you hurt me I promise its a song about how much I fucked up and put you under so much goddamn pressure and made you think you ruined me when i had in me all along.

[jinxx-removing]

Visit Original Link

Take my word for it, I’m not worth it I ignored you all night and you don’t deserve it Morning, bathtub, my skin soft and hot I was sure you were right but you’re not I contemplate my ruined fate Someone will hurt me so bad one day And you’ll resonate or I’ll apologize Or maybe I’ll make the same mistake twice I hide from phone calls under the warm water Malice desists, no it woefully recurs And it plays like daytime TV shows, I confuse you and I tell you not to love me But I still kiss you when I want to And I lament, you’re innocent But somehow the object of my discontent And it’s fucked up, I let you in Even though I’ve seen what can happen You make a tape, receive it in the mail And I force myself busy, the diversion will prevail And I will swallow all my guilt with little pills and forge my chin up And I will only think about it in the morning, in the bathtub

[rchrdrvr]

i wrote a childrens story.

[rchrdrvr]

#no.