❆ / bastard wife @rcslinflcwers - Tumblr Blog

flvwcrs:

it feels as if every single muscle and bone in her body freezes and locks up, icing over and turning cold. she stops thinking, stops feeling — her head looping the same handful of words over and over again. given that i am a bastard and he is a lord–it was secret and ill-fated. that is, until he was betrothed. she had always known that her and nikolai wouldn’t be forever. they weren’t allowed that given who they were, the people they had to be and the cards they were dealt. she had always known nikolai would marry and it wouldn’t be to her. but hearing it from this woman, from rosalin, who had so much in common with her own story, her own life and everything relating to it… kiana bit down hard on her bottom lip, thin and sensitive skin breaking under such a move, the faint metalitic taste of blood emerging after. “oh.” she managed to murmur, the word as disconnected as she felt. ( she wanted to run. go straight to nik as he had said — if anything should happen again, come straight to me. but she wanted to run far away from here, too. run to her mother, to a place where no one knew her name: to save both herself this pain and nik the heartache of loosing this. ) “that must have been very hard for you.” her gaze flickered to the blonde — and idly, kiana wondered what she saw there. “i’m sorry.”

Watching the girl’s reactions, Rosalin felt overwhelmed with emotions. She tended to cry, and this time was no different, but there was something familiar behind the girl’s eyes that she couldn’t ignore nor place. “It is fine, things are how they are meant to be,” her voice shook underneath the forced reassurance. Things had ended up all right, but the dredging up of memories just kept piling up on her. If she didn’t have Maximus, she was certain she would go back to that dark and lonely place in her head once more. “I do not hold any ill will against any of the Hightowers. Not even Augustine. We were just young and foolish and we’re all past that,” she waved her hand flippantly. Her tears stung at the corners of her blue eyes as she lied to Kiana. They were far from past it, at least on her end. She could never say about Augustine though, hardly recognizing the man she once knew better than anyone else. “I do not mean to be a cautionary tale, but if you find yourself with a lord one day...” The sleeve of her pale pink wiped at her tears before she focused on the beauty before her. “Fight. Do not heel like I did.”

maximusgreyjoy:

“Clever has absolutely nothing to do with it.” He muttered. “When we are emotional, we do not always allow ourselves to see all options.” Maximus had spent years training himself to cut emotion from the equation - particularly in battle. You had to be capable of seeing things clearly. “Lannisters and Starks be damned. That is not our battle to fight - nor will it ever be.” The Greyjoys could continue to thrive where they were, even if the rest of the realm went to shit. “I am glad you have yet to bore - I fear we will be here a while longer.”

“We’ll get through it, darling. Whatever may happen, even if there is war, I will do my part to support you,” her freckled nose crinkled as she smiled at him. Where she always compared Augustine to the sun, bright and bold and strong -- Rose thought of Max as the moon. Just as bold, but somehow dark and cold but comforting enough to quiet her mind, powerful enough to control the tides in her heart. As a child, she counted on the moon to keep her company in the lonely darkness. It didn’t seem like that had changed. “How could I be bored when I have you to look forward to? Also, I forgot to mention, I did some stitching on your shirts while you were gone this morning.” She wasn’t going to tell him about the small roses she stitched on the inside of each cuff, he’d have to find that out for himself. “I hope you don’t mind, but they truly needed some mending.”

shaenabaratheon:

Shaena looked at her and wondered if she was going to ask about her whole ordeal with flowering so late, but she was almost relieved when she did. Shaena truly didn’t know why it took her body so long to bleed, but she didn’t have an explanation, nor did any maesters. Shaena shook her head at her next words. “Oh no, you haven’t upset me. I made peace with that long ago.” She offered a small smile. “Thank you, but please, you can just call me Shaena.” She let out a small sigh. “It’s not that I’m unhappy.. though I feel stagnant. I’m five-and-twenty, with no prospects for marriage and only distant cousins to look out for me.” She was grateful for Poppy and Davos, truly, but she had always felt alone as an orphaned only-child. “I want to have more a life- whether that means getting married or not, and not be tucked away in Storm’s End.”

She listened carefully as the young woman spoke so openly about her plights. Rosalin was all too familiar with feeling stagnent, even feeling that way when life was coming at her so fast. From being in Highgarden, to being pregnant and alone, to fighting through the streets with a baby on her hip. While the situations were definitely different, Rosalin still felt her heart break. She wrapped her arms around the girl and patted her gently. “It will get better, Shaena. I was 23 with a bastard and then 28 when I became a wife, and even then I’m hardly a proper wife by Mainlander standards.” She withdrew gently and smiled. “You never know what life will bring you, dear. It is quite a journey.”

achingblvsh:

he merely stared at her for several moments at such words, forgetting sometimes that she had once been as soft as the rest of the mainlanders. he opts not to give her an answer for that instead, not interested enough to know whether that was her true reasoning or not. “you wouldn’t have lasted nearly as long as you have if they were. wouldn’t be where you are, either.” the iron islands certainly weren’t kind to those who weren’t equipped to handle their lifestyle, and nymeria was walking proof of her. “fine. nymeria stays out of my way, jeyne seems to enjoy people’s reactions to her. the others have complained about being away from home.”

“I will take that as a compliment,” she teased before turning her attention solely toward him. “I consider myself very fortunate to be where I am at, given the nature of things. Although, it did require some adjustment from Highgarden, I do not think I could survive those lands anymore.” It was particularly true in her circumstance, but she also grew to love the sea. “I trust in the Drowned God, and they should too. We will always find our way to the sea.”

#alek

maximusgreyjoy:

Pride swelled in his chest at her words, fingers itching to draw her mouth back to his but ultimately resisting. But at the feel of a trembling hand within his own, Maximus wasted no time bringing her fingers to his lips. “You did what you felt best. We are in no rush to make a decision, but should you still feel uncertain, perhaps we will simply… ask your son what he wishes.” It seemed like a fools plan - allowing such a young boy to decide his fate, but Maximus’ plans tended to border foolhardy. “Everyone is bored. It’s only a matter of time before a fight between different ruling houses breaks… and I would much prefer you be far from here when it does.”

Rosalin hadn’t thought of asking Ben exactly what he wanted, she assumed Augustine would just take him. Though it was not as if he was short on heirs or spares by the looks of it. Rose was still surprised each day by the man before her, and she hoped that he’d continue to surprise her in the years to come. If they got that long, that is. “You are so clever, Maximus. That is a splendid idea,” eyes kind on him. “I hope it doesn’t happen but I imagine the Lannisters will provoke someone somewhere and the Starks will try to intervene and then all the vassals have to get involved. It is silly. Besides, I personally am not bored here.”

flvwcrs:

brows lifted as the blonde spoke of laila — she had never seemed little to kiana, but rather warm, soft, loyal. she supposed that was what happened when two different people knew of the same person at different points in their life. “he is.” kiana replied, nodding softly. “one of the best i have known.” her experience with lords had never been positive — her own father and half-brothers speaking to that. yet it was the hightowers that had changed her perception of family, of being welcomed amongst those who loved you. ( nikolai, more so than the others. ) “you… seem to have been well situated… amongst the hightowers.” curiosity coated her tone. “i wonder why you left, if that was the case.”

The inevitable questions finally came to, and Rosalin was still not as prepared as she thought she would be. It was hard to discuss, even though the Hightowers now all knew. Save for Oceara, still. Regardless, there wasn’t anything Rosalin had to be ashamed of anymore. Augustine loved her and she loved Augustine, there had been no wrongdoing. She sighed and fumbled her hands together nervously. “Well, it is a bit of a story but I will try to be brief.” Rosalin took a long breath as her hands still mangled together. “Augustine and I loved each other for many years, but given that I am a bastard and he is a lord--it was secret and ill-fated. It went on for years, to the point that we raised Laila together. That is, until he was betrothed. We had one last night together before he went to visit the Iron Islands. I ended up pregnant, and his mother sent me away as soon as she found out, and I left without a trace, without any goodbyes. By the time I gave birth to our son, he was already married and in love with Lady Hightower,” Rosalin forced a smile, it still hurt. She knew that it shouldn’t still hurt.

maximusgreyjoy:

“You may not be an Islander by blood, but you are by soul. I expect nothing less. But we have no reason to fight anyone - not now. Let us enjoy the quiet before the storm.” It would all come crashing down sooner or later, for he knew better then to believe the good would last forever, but Maximus would cherish it none the less. “Do you truly wish for Ben to go with him?” Should she state otherwise, he would make sure things were different. “Alek and lovely do not belong anywhere near one another,” he muttered. “Islanders are getting rowdy. We had a few conflicts but they have been resolved. I spoke with Alek briefly to attempt getting instruction, but we all know how that goes.”

“Mm, I learned to be an Islander from the best, did I not?” She smiled and moved her head to rest on his. He still smelled of the sea, it felt like home. He was home. At his question, though, her smile faltered. Rosalin wasn’t sure what she wanted to do. Of course she didn’t want to give up her son, but she felt as if she was obligated to give him the best opportunities, and being with his father seemed the better option. Her hand trembled in his. “I do not know what would be best, clearly I never did...” Rosalin’s ears fell deaf for a moment when he talked, but she pulled herself out of her mind long enough to catch on. “Of course, I am certain he is just busy, he can’t be doing any better than the rest of us here. We must remember that his shoulders carry a heavier burden, Maximus. Though I think the men are more bored than anything.”

maximusgreyjoy:

He’d spent time worrying over what others might think - particularly Islanders - for him disregarding his wife to spend time adoring a cousins salt wife instead. But with her seated beside him and a plethora of weapons strapped about his person, Maximus found himself no longer caring. “You needn’t fight a soul - Drowned God included. For not even he will separate us, I promise you that.” Despite having sworn that she could leave when she wished, Max was certain he’d spend every breath fighting such a thing. He’d lost the first woman he’d loved, it wouldn’t happen a second time. “Tell me of your morning - since I was forced to leave you.”

“I would never let you fight alone, it would be unwise for you to doubt me.” Rosalin’s voice was still gentle, despite the darkness that coursed through her words. Her body wanted to press against his but she thought better of it, they weren’t Dothraki, and they certainly were in the wrong. “Well, my love, I saw Augustine, he found Ben. I talked to his siblings, who apparently were hurt and worried that I had left. Oh, and I spoke to Alek, of course not mentioning anything. He was as lovely as ever. How about yourself? Any issues?”

maximusgreyjoy:

He’d tried to believe her over the years when she spoke, but after failing to find the help his first wife had required, some part of him had always harbored doubt on his own abilities. “I would not ask you to do anything you did not wish. Wild or gentle, I would love you just the same.” Fingers of his free hand reached over and wrapped gently against the back of her neck - drawing her close for lips to press against her hairline. “You do not realize how close nor how frequently I contemplated relinquishing my control to you. We would have denied ourselves for a while longer, but you would have broken me sooner or later. Whether it be through words or a different dress.” Drawing back from her, he shrugged. “We will ride the tide together. No matter where or what it brings to us.”

His blatant tenderness with her was something Rosalin was still struggling to process, believing that she was stuck in her own head and not in the reality that was before her. She couldn’t doubt his love when he was so public with his affection, part of her wondered if word had gotten to her husband yet but his words caught her off guard as her heart swelled on every passing syllable. “I would say you broke me, Maximus.” Rosalin drew him back to her and kissed him. Nothing else mattered in that moment, she was giving him everything. “I would fight the Drowned God for this to last longer. I have...never felt this strongly about a man before. Not even my son’s father.”

grcyjovs:

“you seem to be in good spirits today.” he commented instead, noticing the positive air around her being, her laughs and smiles that he certainly didn’t often see whenever he went to visit maximus. “we belong back on the iron islands, close to the sea where we can sail our ships without the king’s fucking approval.” he scoffed then, eyeing her in his periphreal vision before rolling his eyes. “why, so i can be compared to all the pretty lords down here with their soft hands and flowery words? i’m sure they’d much like that if i started acting like them.” the rest of westeros didn’t tend to like iron islanders, a fact that did not escape him and one he hardly minded either.

“Oh, well, you know....dark times need kind hearts and all,” she stumbled. Rosalin had never been good at lying, nor being put on the spot. Alek was always so grumpy, but he still treated her with respect. “I daresay the idea doesn’t fit you, no. Personally flowery lords are not my particular interest, obviously.” Her eyes scanned around for the guard Max -- not her husband -- had assigned her. “How are your wives, Alek? Are they faring well in the capital? I know Lady Greyjoy seems in higher moods around her people, but I am concerned about the salt wives, of course.”

lordnikolai:

EVEN THOUGH IT HAD BEEN ten years since he’d last seen her, nikolai recognized rosalin the moment he looked at her. it would’ve been difficult the woman who had been so involved in raising laila alongside augustine and himself. he smiled warmly at her. “ rosalin. i hope i’ve grown more handsome as well. ” he raised an eyebrow, unable to restrain the laugh that fell from his lips. “ it’s so good to see you again. you have been well, i hope? we all worried about you when you left. ” to this day, nikolai still didn’t know why she had left, but even though she didn’t work at highgarden anymore didn’t mean nik didn’t wish her the best.

“Yes, quite handsome, definitely more handsome than Augustine these days,” Rosalin laughed. His admission that people had been worried sent a pang and a shock through her heart. For the longest time she convinced herself that everyone forgot, that she was just there and gone and that was that. It didn’t help the guilt she felt. “I fell pregnant, I couldn’t perform my duties effectively so I was dismissed. But I’ve found peace in the Iron Islands, oddly enough. They’re so rough but so kind,” she assured sincerely. Rosalin had told just about every Hightower at this point, save for Augustine’s own wife. But Rosalin still maintained that she needed to hear it from him, not her nor anyone else. “I’m surprised you haven’t married yet?”

maximusgreyjoy:

“We all have bad habits, but your good outweigh your bad.” Maximus believed himself to be the opposite - his bad traits various and good limited - which was why he cared little for appearances outside of their little family. Their opinion was all that mattered. “Careful woman - you near broke me and your claws are sharp.” The words were teasing as fingers moved to scope up the hand against his thigh. “Do not give a man such hopes - dangerous waters… and this - us - we would have happened. It just may have taken longer.”

“I could say the same about you, but I do not think you’d ever believe me.” Rosalin had meant it, she had always gotten the feeling that perhaps the man she pined after for years was not always as kind to himself as she should be, which was why she always made the increased effort to remind him of his good. “I could always be more gentle, if that’s what you’d like,” she whispered as her eyes fell to their hands. “Do you think so? We were clearly both very good at denying ourselves. Besides, are journeys not more interesting in dangerous waters? I’d much rather ride a storm’s tide with you than any other, the Drowned God has only given us a taste of what is in store, I fear.”

augstvnes:

With the news that he may have a son out there somewhere, Augustine sent his men to search for the boy. He sent a man to every kingdom and even one to Essos. If Ben was still alive, he would find him. And that he did. It couldn’t be worse timing with the murder but the man he sent to look for him in the Crownlands had come back with good news. His son was here in the capital, alive. The second he heard the news, he wanted to find Rose. He couldn’t image the pain she was feeling. He was just about to search for her when he heard his name get called. Seeing it was her, he was taken aback for a moment. “ I was just on my way to find you.” He knew his expression was giving him away that he has important information to share.

Rosalin struggled to hide the immediate discomfort she felt when he spoke. It wasn’t usually a good thing when a man felt so pressed to share information. Typically it was either bad or good, and despite being an optimist, Rosalin dreaded the worst. After all, most of her suffering stemmed - in some form or another - from the very man in front of her. The pounding in her chest felt as if the whole Keep could hear it but Rosalin just looked at him strangely. “I guess I must have some sort of sense, then. Perhaps able to read your mind?”

steelwcters:

“not the corpse, but the overreaction,” he said, quite short and precise, as he focussed on the fairhaired woman - wondering who she was and if she was going to go running to the royals about his foul mouth. he hoped not. he remained silent, but the surprise was clear on his face at her question; domas looked at his stained, scarred, calloused hands and then back up to her - a potential customer and chance to work was never far from his mind in each conversation.

“aye. i am. did you need something made in the wake of all this fuckery, m’lady?”

Her didn’t flinch but her heart pounded in her neck. Rosalin had many questions to ask, did he know the man who helped give birth to her son? Her milk white hand reached out and touched his shoulder in a patting motion a couple of times. Rosalin was careful not to hug strangers, but his hands reminded her so much of an old friend. “I might, in fact. For a close friend but...” Her voiced trailed off and she nodded gently. “I’ve always been grateful to those in your trade for the kindness once shown to me.” Rosalin retreated her hand and smiled brightly, as she often did. “I’m Rosalin Flowers, I’m originally from The Reach but I live amongst the Iron Born as a Salt Wife. A blacksmith helped deliver my son.”

shaenabaratheon:

The woman had her full attention, her blue eyes were still wide as she talked about the culture of the Iron Islands. “Well, I must admit I’ve been told some troubling tales, but the Ironborn are not the only people to cause trouble in Westeros.” She truly wanted to learn more, but she didn’t want to annoy the woman. “As do I. Though I fear it gets me into trouble sometimes.” Shaena laughed at her question. “Once, to a Dornish man a long time ago, but he fled Westeros.” Shaena forced herself to chuckle, but in truth, his leaving only amplified her insecurities. “You see, I didn’t bleed until I was nineteen. On top of that, I was not the most beautiful woman. You may have heard some jokes about the ugly stag of Storm’s End.” Shaena’s fingers played with the ends of her hair as she spoke. “But, the gods were good and as I got older, in the last four years or so, I’ve seemed to gain some beauty. Thus, it was very hard for Lord and Lady Baratheon to attempt to secure a husband for me.”

Nineteen was a very old age to first bleed, and Rosalin wanted to ask if the maester had given any reason but she refrained her ardent curiosity. She frowned, though, when she said that people called her ugly. Rosalin was very much in the belief that all women, and girls, were beautiful and must be told as much. It would have saved her a lot of trouble if it hadn’t been a man to tell her as much for the first time. Still, Rosalin shook her head. “The marriage thing is a tricky ordeal, and I apologize if I have upset you in any way. I never heard such jokes nor would I listen if I had. You’re quite beautiful Lady Baratheon, do not ever question it or tell yourself otherwise.”

rcdfort-deactivated20200421

it was though the lords and ladies had never heard of a murder, or seen a body in a pool of blood. blood was his home, blood and steel - he couldn’t understand their panic. he also couldn’t understand why people were being boxed in like unruly animals - “i’ll admit,” he drank deep of the dark beer, “seeing the nobles in such a state over a corpse and some blood is very, very funny.”

rcslinflcwers

“I don’t think it’s necessary funny,” Rosalin stumbled quietly next to the large man. Her eyes looked over him and she noticed a familiar staining on his hands. Part of her was curious, the other part was moderately scared. Hands like that had helped and hurt her many times over, but the far off Ironborn was still near, and if Max had trusted him, then Rosalin had to be safe. Her back itched where the scar tissue draped over her skin. “Excuse me, are you a blacksmith, by chance?”

@lordnikolai

It seemed she was destined to run into every single Hightower in the kingdoms the longer they were kept there. Though it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, the one she dreaded the most was still far away to her knowledge. Rosalin partly wanted to run into the head mother, to tell her everything, but she suspected the cruel elder wouldn’t care. Rosalin would still have the scars on her back regardless. Nikolai had always been a kind boy, reminded her of Augustine in a few ways but he was certainly his own person. Her hand touched his shoulder gently, trying to not cause a stir. “Lord Hightower--Nikolai, you’ve grown so tall I hardly recognized you!”

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