In this entry, I will go over the messages that Franchesca and my husband exchanged where she legally threatened me with a defamation of character lawsuit.
THE BACKSTORY: on July 23, I found out that Franchesca posted a video of Wendy McElroy’s portion of the Brown University debate, along with a commentary she had written about it on her Facebook wall. In her commentary, she wrote that a “broadcaster, defending a celebrity rapist….has been slapped with SEXUAL HARRASSMENT cases in the past (Olivia Non and his ex-staff Sheila Mae)”. The post has since been edited to remove Olivia Non’s name. Note the date it was edited:
The broadcaster she was talking about is Mr. Tony Calvento. The name Olivia Non name had been mentioned a few times in discussions, but this was the first time that I heard anything about a sexual harassment case that she supposedly filed against Mr. Calvento. I spoke to Mr. Calvento via viber phone and I asked him who is Olivia Non, and what is her story? He told me the story and answered all my questions, and then he asked me why I asked about her, so I told him what I had seen. A day or two later, I learned that Franchesca and Mr. Calvento were at each other’s throats again, but it was another few days before I got to read Mr. Calvento’s posts and I realized that this shit storm started because of me and my curiosity about Olivia Non. (I will post their exchange at a later date.) This part of the story begins when I jumped in the discussion.
Because I’m blocked from viewing Franchesca’s account and I had not yet received any screenshots, I could only see Mr. Calvento’s posts. I wanted to try and defuse the situation, so just after midnight on July 29, I posted the following to the Tony A. Calvento public Facebook page:
(Before I continue, remember the date the post was edited? I want to point out that she edited her post the day AFTER I posted that I read Olivia Non’s affidavit.)
The evening of July 29,  my husband called me from work sounding a little annoyed and told me to log in his Facebook account and check his messages because there was a “surprise” there that I was gonna want to read. I asked him what he meant, and he replied, “just check my messages. Have fun reading, but don’t do anything and don’t even think about writing back, because it was sent to me”. So I checked his messages, found my “surprise”, and I understood why he was annoyed. I also had fun reading the “surprise”, which was a private message that Franchesca sent him 7 hours after I posted my message on the KKK wall LOL. Following is the entire Facebook message exchange between Franchesca and my husband (which I divided into numbered sections to make it easier for me to discuss below):
Highlighted in blue is not relevant to what I am discussing in this entry, but I want to make note of it because it is something that I will be talking about in great detail in the near future.
Section 1
I have NOT been “cooperating with Tony Calvento…to spread lies about [Franchesca] so Tony could discredit [her]”. What I know about her life is what she told me: that her family is well-off, she was adopted by the Aquinos, and that she is the half-sister of Jason and Joshua Zamora. The only club ever mentioned in our conversations was the Ozone club, where she said her second husband died in the Ozone fire. I don’t know anything about her first husband other than he is the father of her eldest daughter. All I know about her marriage to her third husband (or former marriage since they’re divorced) is that she says her ex-husband abused her and cheated on her so she divorced him and she pays him child support because her youngest daughter lives with him. She told me her biological father was a dancer and he died shortly after they reconnected. She said she was a radio show host for a few years. She said she had a magazine too. Oh, and we can’t forget, she said she was once a model too. And she was an actress for Seiko films and “boss Vic” asked her to sleep with him but she turned him down. Oh yah, she was also an interior designer who redesigned the inside of a hotel. She must be a big time designer because the contract was worth 2 million dollars. And omg I can’t believe I almost forgot to mention that she was a business owner too! Her lucrative business was for “corporate conference calls” for when business people wanted to have video conference calls or something (which is strange, because while it can be used for business meetings, that was never how Paltalk advertised itself, so very few people if any at all used it for that purpose. Plus the video chatrooms she owned the rights to certainly did not seem very “corporate” at all), and she even had 50 staff (also strange because Jason Katz, the founder and CEO of paltalk had a total of 37 employees in 2007, and less in the years before that. How did she have more employees than the founder of the business that she bought some chatrooms from?) I don’t know why she thinks Mr. Calvento got his information from me because what I know about her is so different from everything he said.Â
Section 2
“I am no longer allowing anyone to defame and destroy me my reputation with blatant lies.“ this made me laugh because she’s the one who does the most damage to her reputation. And LOL at “respectfully” too hahahaha.
She said she wouldn’t hurt me because I have five children. She later changed the words a few times. The word “legal” wasn’t added until later.
LMFAO “continuously and relentlessly” trying to take her down? OK, let’s see: December 2014 all I did was I said publicly was that I wanted out of UVAR because of differences that I didn’t specify. Franchesca is the one who let her delusional imagination run wild because of what OTHER PEOPLE did. February 2015 Franchesca said a bunch of shit on the Global Netizens page that she didn’t think I’d find out about because she blocked me. She also emailed that page an INCOMPLETE set of screenshots, trying to paint me in a bad light. She reported the page soon after. March 2015 after I confronted her, she and some others started attacking me on Twitter even though they know I don’t go on Twitter often. Also in March when I tried to defend myself, she started reporting my posts. She even tried to have my entire account deactivated. In July started trashing me on Twitter again. And what have I been doing to her? NOTHING. So who is “continuously and relentlessly” trying to take whom down?
“Joy and her friends, ONCE I CAN PROVE HOW MUCH THEY ARE INVOLVED IN THE DEFAMATION, will be made accountable.” (emphasis mine)
OMG. Franchesca sent me a legal threat through my husband with some pretty serious allegations, and she IS NOT EVEN SURE OF MY INVOLVEMENT IN ANY OF IT???
Section 3
She’s right, I am insignificant in the cases. If I’m so insignificant, why is she so distracted by me even though I’m not doing anything to distract her? She has also said I’m irrelevant. Stop watching me, I’m insignificant and irrelevant!
“I do hope someone could put some sense into her.” HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Section 4
I can imagine what it feels like to have people say untrue things about me. In fact, I KNOW what it feels like to have people repeatedly say untrue things about me to try and discredit me. They’ve been saying that I’m a “liar”, I’m “two-faced”, and that I “protect rapists”. I can’t believe had the nerve to try to get empathy from my husband.
A lot has been said about me in the real world as well as the cyber world. For the most part, I don’t care what people say or think, especially when it’s not true. There have been many times that I got a good laugh from reading the “bashing”, and believe it or not, I really like some of the people who once bashed me. And even with all the bashing, the discussions and debates we used to have were fun…but then someone ruined it. The difference between Franchesca’s lies and everyone else’s lies is that there’s no malice in everyone’s lies.
The next three sections make up my husband’s reply to Franchesca.
Section 5
For those who don’t speak Filipino, here is the English translation:
“You don’t know my wife that well. You don’t know anything about her life, so you have no right to talk adout her like that. Did you think I would believe what you’re saying? Do I look stupid to you? I know Joy very very well. I don’t need to think twice to know she will never do those. You have some nerve to talk that way. Did you think that I don’t know anything about what Joy says or does? I know everything. I was often right next to her when she was chatting with you and I read your chats. There was no inappropriate behaviour from her, you’re the one with inappropriate behaviour towards her so she cut ties with you. I’m not gonna argue whether or not you threatened her. I stand by my wife and I support her.
Section 6
English translation:
“Who is your informant for this nonsense you wrote me? Your informant is stupid. You’re also stupid if you believe [your informant]. My wife is not telling Tony Calvento anything about you….I’m sitting beside her when they talk on the phone and they don’t talk about you. You are not the reason my wife talks to tony calvento. It’s none of your business. Who are you that Joy would want to take you down? Are you higher than her? Are you such an important person that she is intimidated by you? From December until now, you are still saying that my wife is trying to take you down. She is not doing any of that. Move on. Concentrate on your so-called advocacy. You’re too interested in my wife. Maybe it’s you who wants to take her down.”
Section 7
The major point in this section is that my husband tells Franchesca not to mention our kids again, to stop harassing me, to leave our family alone, and not to contact him again.
My husband is awesome
Section 8
Someone just has to have the last word. Either that or she doesn’t understand “do not contact me again”.
I’d love to hear what information Mr. Calvento disclosed that’s supposed to be based on a conversation I had with her.
Section 9
Yeah. Screenshot or no screenshot, it’s definitely imagined. There is no conspiracy. No one wants to take her down. She’s already down.
But wait. She told my husband that she’s going to sue me for “conspiring” and “cooperating” with Mr. Calvento to spread lies about her to discredit her and “take her down”, right?
….now she says she’s going to sue me for publicly saying that she threatened me back in December. Did she change her mind, or did she lose her mind? Is she suing me for both? Or is she just trying her hardest to find ANYTHING to hold against me?Â
The major motivation behind starting this blog is to share my side of a story. It is a story that borders on the ridiculous. It is a story that has many layers, so at times it is a story that does not make sense. It's a story that revolves around the Vhong Navarro rape case in the Philippines; a case I have been following since the news broke in January 2014. Actually, that's not right. It is a story that involves A PERSON and her group who happened to have connected with the defendants in the aforementioned case. I do not have any prior connections to anyone involved in this case, and my only involvement has always been participating in online discussions on various Facebook pages. I normally post/share anything and everything on Facebook, and I’ve tried posting about this there already, but unfortunately, I was unsuccessful. Any posts I had relating this were reported, and most were removed by Facebook with no explanation other than the posts were somehow in violation of their standards. I was almost at the point of giving up on this, but I struggled a lot with that thought for many reasons. I was trying to come to terms with the fact that my voice would not be heard when the following landed in my husband's Facebook inbox:
And thus, the third cycle of bullshit began. Yes, you read that right. THIRD CYCLE. The first was in December 2014. The second was in March. Thankfully, my husband and I share a close relationship and he has always known everything about my online activities, including the entire history of this situation.
Over the last 10 months, I have been dragged through the mud. FRANCHESCA CHAI AQUINO CERONE, who calls herself an “advocate” for victims and who claims to be all about being “supportive” of women and “lifting women up”, has been trying to destroy my name with false accusations and outright lies. But of all the things that has EVER been said, the following (which was posted the day after I posted a cease and desist letter I wrote her) is what I CAN NOT ACCEPT AND WILL NEVER ALLOW:
Similar things about me “protecting rapists” have been said in the past 10 months, and of all the shit thrown at me in my entire life, this takes the cake. I’m not offended my many things. This offends me. Anyone who knows me will tell you that getting bashed online doesn’t bother me. But this - “protects rapists” - do not ever say that about me and/or paint me in that light. Say what you will about my character, I don’t care. Do not say that I would protect rapists.
When I was 9 years old, I was molested by the adult son of my babysitter. Their dog attacked him and saved me from being raped. From 14 to 17 I was in a physically and mentally abusive relationship. He raped me. Just before my 16th birthday, I tried to kill myself. But instead of telling him to stay the hell away from me after we broke up, I agreed to try to “fix things” and “work things out”. A few months later, he came to my high school unexpectedly to “surprise me”. It was lunchtime, and I was sitting in a car with some of my girl friends. No big deal, right? Wrong. The car we were sitting in happened to be owned by a guy, and he knew it. That I was sitting in a guy’s car sent him in a fit of rage. He walked up, opened the door, grabbed me, and started pulling me by the arm away from everyone. We were struggling with each other and motioned like he was about to hit me. I turned my head away and braced for impact, and that’s when I caught a glimpse of my friends. That’s when I realized that this was now actually happening in front of people, and if I didn’t get myself as far away as I possibly can from that monster, things would likely not end well for me. I don’t know how I did it or where I got the strength, but I managed to free myself from his grip and punch that fucker in the face. I walked away from him and never looked back. Two years later just when I turned 19, I was working for a marketing company. I was in a part of the city I was unfamiliar with, and I got hopelessly lost. It was the middle of the day, and I was wandering around on foot, getting more lost by the minute. I saw an apartment building and decided to go there and ask the building manager or caretaker for directions and call my coworkers. I pressed the button for the caretaker and a friendly voice answered. He buzzed me in and even came to the door to get me. We were walking towards what I thought was the apartment office when suddenly there was a hand covering my mouth and nose and I was frozen in fear. He put something on my head and pulled it down to cover my eyes and led me to what I assume was his apartment. I can’t remember much of anything other than I thought he was going to kill me. I remember thinking that because I was stupid enough to get lost, and of all the people to ask for help, I had to ask the psycho rapist and now I was gonna die. I have a scar on my leg from the knife or blade or whatever it was he used to scare the living shit out of me so I would not fight or scream. I can’t remember anything about the building except that the door was glass and the word caretaker next to the button that I pressed. I don’t remember what he looked like other than he had a beard and I *think* brown hair, but I’m not even sure if it was brown. I don’t remember getting cut by the knife or blade or whatever. I don’t remember when the head cover was removed. I remember almost getting hit by a car when I was crossing the road. Then I remember being on a busy road and walking to a car dealership. To this day, no matter how much I try, I can not remember much of what happened. But then bits and pieces snake their way to the surface at the most unexpected times. Trigger warnings are stupid and useless because nothing can say what will trigger a flashback. Literally anything and everything can trigger a flashback/memory. What’s worse, the memories that came back have all been mundane things or things that don’t help me with being able to identify the man, like for example what he looks like, or the street address of the building. What I got instead was that the car that almost ran me over was a silver 4 door, and that there was bird shit on the walkway leading up to the door of the building. That man was never prosecuted or even arrested. I never even filed a police report, and for a long long time, I didn't even tell anyone. It took longer still, to tell anyone I was close to. How could I? I had no details. In fact, I didn’t even know anything for a while. And even today I don't know much. I felt so stupid on so many levels. Because of how I felt, I was convinced that everyone would not only feel the same way, they would also not believe me and think I was lying. I suffered in silence for many years, but I made it through, and I know I am a much stronger person because of it. One reason I believe in God is because there is no way I could have made it by myself. I truly believe He carried me through the hardest times. I have been through a lot. I am not perfect, but I am proud of who I am today. I am proud of what I accomplished despite what I have been through, and it's thanks in part to those events that I know I have the strength to do anything. It hasn't been easy. I still have my bad days. But they are becoming fewer and far between. I am very anxious about experiencing the flashback or series of flashbacks of the actual event, but I have a strong support system in place and I am confident that although it will likely be rough for a while, everything will turn out well. I am fortunate that there is no statute of limitation for sexual assault in my country. I don’t have to worry about my brain missing a deadline and I am free to pursue legal justice when I am ready in my own time.
It's time for me to speak and be heard. In this blog, I will tell the story from my perspective. I will lay it all out, INCLUDING my own actions and indiscretions. I will address everything that Franchesca and the other people of UVAR have ever said to and/or about me that I know of. Every accusation, every allegation, every problem, every statement, every lie. I will also take us through my own personal story of survival. You will get to know the real me, not the cockamamie version of me that Franchesca/UVAR is advertising.Â
TO FRANCHESCA: take your own advice and educate yourself about rape so you can empower survivors. Sit down and pay attention. Class is now in session.
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