You hear the term “quality of life” all the time but what I’ve really become very adamant about talking about is something called “quality of death”. And I think our society, especially in our culture and society, which I know you’ve done so much work in talking to people about what our society is doing to dogs in terms of just healthy young dogs and our expectations, but the same thing is our expectations and understanding of what death is and what end of life should look like. We don’t talk about it enough, what quality of death is. Death seems like such a scary, final thing and it is final but it doesn’t have to be scary and it can be celebrated and it can be done in a really kind, peaceful, non-emergency, non-painful way and that’s what I really strive for with these dogs.
That’s not to say I won’t get a dog that someone will tell me, “I know he doesn’t have long, he might only have a couple of weeks” and I’ll take him and I’ll be like, I know this dog only has a couple of weeks, and 24 hours after having this dog I’m like, this dog can never die because I love them so much – I get super attached. But what I’ve realised is that I cannot hold on for me, I have to let them go for them. It’s not about having them go on their worst day, that’s what I’ve really learned. A lot of these dogs have chronic illnesses – all of these dogs have chronic illnesses or ailments or age – and they’re never going to get better. This is not something that’s going to improve. It might plateau, I might have them feel better when they did when they first came and they weren’t on any medicine, but they are never going to go back to puppyhood. So I have to make those decisions for that dog when they tell me, and not be selfish about it, but also when I’m realising that they’re on that downward curve now, they’re on that downward spiral, and I owe it to them to not just give them a good end of life but also a really good death and have them be cognisant and aware and have a great last day before that happens and that gives me a lot more – I’m not going to say I don’t mourn their loss or feel sad when they go, but it gives me a lot more peace in knowing that I’ve given them that rather than I shouldn’t have waited, that type of regret that some people have felt.
— Helen St. Pierre, Old Dogs Go to Helen – A Special Episode Dedicated to Our Older Friends, The BItey End of the Dog
This was a really excellent episode that gave me the words for something I also strongly feel is important – “quality of death”. It was really wonderful to hear Helen’s experiences with senior dogs, I learnt a lot.
