The Dating Misadventures of Reluctant Romantics

We traverse the trials of dating in the current millennium, when we would really rather be reading (or watching) about it. Also, cookies!

[greatdreamsfordreamers]

Love when your heart is ready not when it’s lonely.

(via greatdreamsfordreamers)

[quesotocino]

My first birthday card!

[neverfitin]

Can this be a thing? PLEASE…

[joquz]

New generation dating :)

[reluctantromantics-blog]

No Stark, No Spark

Ok Romantics (aka anyone who may have happened upon this), I went on my first date since starting this tumblr last Friday. I will give a brief synopsis of date, however a rating scale has not yet been created since I’ve been swamped this week. I am going to try my best to get a rating scale made this weekend so that we may *eventually* run correlations.

So small tip - if you are looking for someone to date IRL (not through online platforms) your local young professionals organization is a good place to try. When I moved to my current city I didn’t have many friends so I joined the local YP org to try and meet new people. Infinitely scary for introverts I know however it was this or never have anyone to eat brunch with on the weekends. Gotta have that breakfast food & champagne cocktail so I steeled myself up and prepared for the battle that is meeting new people. Since joining I have discovered that the YP org is full of single men in their 20s and 30s who are generally friendly and gainfully employed. It is from this pool of men that I found my date.

After meeting at a YP event or two, we exchanged numbers and began to text. After about 2 weeks of texting we agreed to have pizza last Friday. Here is my question - when a guy asks if you would like to get pizza on Friday night - that is a date correct?? Because I have yet to meet someone who specifies it as a date. What if he thinks we’re just friends? This unknown factor terrifies me. Life would be much simpler if people just called it straight out - no guessing.

Following a round of supportive texts from Ally I got up the gumption to attend the date.

It was fine. 

I feel like that pretty much says it all. He was a nice guy, we had a nice time. There was ice cream after pizza. Between the Friday night timing, pizza parlor & ice cream shop I felt like a real 1950s sitcom. While it was a perfectly enjoyable few hours, there was no spark, no chemistry. I knew what time it was (time never flew), and eventually ended the evening to hang out with a friend. I guess he felt the same way too because we haven’t spoken since. NBD, especially because he doesn’t watch GOT. What?! While this doesn’t disqualify someone completely it certainly doesn’t help.

[reluctantromantics-blog]

St Pattys Cookies!! Date post soon!

[reluctantromantics-blog]

Adult Wednesday Addams: Internet Date

Searching for an accomplice

[emilys-nostalgia]

‎’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their right to say no.

And “bitch” is attacking women for their right to call you on it.  (via invisible-teens)

[reluctantromantics-blog]

Pride and Workplace Romance

Ok so my adventures into real life dating began with a bang today. As I mentioned before I work in a manufacturing setting, where I am one of few females. I am really the only female who spends a decent amount of time on the shop floor with the guys. And while most days I thoroughly enjoy this aspect of my job there are days where it can grate on me. To adapt the amazing Jane Austen to the manufacturing world: It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman at a manufacturing plant must be in want of a date.

People of tumblr (if there are any of you out there), there are many directions I could take this post but I think I will stick to the basics - dating at work. Today one of the workers who I considered my work friend asked me to go on a date. When I was (legitimately) busy that day, he said that we should date. This was not the first worker to ask me out and chances are he will not be the last. 

Now, there are many facets of thought on this topic however I subscribe to avoiding dating in the workplace if at all possible. I have worked in human resources and have a firm grasp on the mess (sexual harassment and otherwise) that relationships in the workplace can cause. I firmly hold these beliefs (made easier because I’m not interested in anyone at my work) and make them known. So today when he made it clear that he would like to date (me specifically) I espoused these beliefs once again, in the nicest way I know how.

If that was the end of it however it would not be much for a blog post, so in plot development, my beliefs were not taken in good measure. I was told “oh thats silly”, “we don’t actually work for the same people”, “come on thats not a real reason”. Two things: one these are my beliefs and they should be accepted and not questioned repeatedly, two I am not interested in this person but I thought sticking to my principles would be a softer blow that would allow us to remain friendly co-workers. Therefore it should not come as a shock that him not accepting “no” for an answer started to frustrate me.

I am not the world’s nicest person. I am not bitchy per say, but I tell like it is in most every situation. So after 5 minutes of a down spiral of a conversation I simply told it like it is and said “I don’t shit where I eat”. Yes, I did actually say those exact words. While they were maybe not the kindest choice, they were effective.

Here are my questions tumblr universe - do you believe in dating at work? Have you experienced something similar? I understand the guts it must take to ask someone out so I always try to be kind but straightforward with my responses, however once I have expressed disinterest why push it? Especially in the workplace where these things are delicate, I would think once a party has not reciprocated it is best to move on. What do you think?  Just my thoughts as I forge forward into the dating world, though not this time I suppose...

[reluctantromantics-blog]

Adult Wednesday Addams: The Apartment Hunt [S1, Ep 1]

Watch it. Trust me.

[wifey-riddim]

[teantacles-deactivated20200702]

[wakeupwithsun]

[landregan]

[ikonicgif]

[chanel-and-louboutins]

★

[trextrying]

[reluctantromantics-blog]

Ally Post-Day 1

I’ve done it. I’ve taken the leap into the inevitable void of online dating. My sites of choice: okcupid and Match. I cannot rate the quality of such mediums at this time, but the variety in men is another story. My town is quite small, so there are limits on my expectations of the men who I am matched with, and let me tell you, they weren’t high to begin with. Nevertheless, it is possible there is a diamond in the rough and I will continue in my efforts to find him. So far, however, he’s far from close. I’m to grateful to have received more than 20 likes, winks, and messages combined over the last 24 hours, but for some reason the men who have engaged me so far are nowhere near my match rate. Which prompts me to say, “excuse you, boo, but I need you to take a math class because anything below 65% does not equate compatibility and means you’ve failed.” With such results, it’s becoming obvious to me that none of these men have looked past my profile picture to read my actual page to determine if we’re a good match. This, of course, makes me wonder whether or not anyone will value what I really have to give, but I suppose I can only wait and see what more is in store for me. So onward ho! I will not let superficiality prevent my cause. I am woman. Hear me roar!