remsday @remsday - Tumblr Blog

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[Talking about how difficult folding a burrito is:]

The chicks at Chipotle are like warlocks walking amongst us.

I think where is it at

OR

Sometimes I imagine 18 wheelers as giant caterpillars, and like the truck drivers torso is attached to it like a centaur.

All of these years I’ve been reluctant to drink much milk from my glass while eating Oreos in fear of the milk level getting too low to dunk.

It didn’t occur to me until right now to just

tip the fucking glass.

Do you have any peanut butter back at your campsite?

No, but I have sunflower butter!

It’s a fuckin massive hit of the Juul, none of the bong. It’s like a puzzle man!

Chicano Batman is an angel from Spanish Heaven, sent to fill my soul.

(We tuned into the radio for only five seconds and this was what was said:)

The cat was utterly unmoved.

Dude!! Guess what I did today! I smoked a cig out of a tiny hand!!

[Marc, talking about his Cookout quesadilla:]

Oh there’s a little burnt chicken in there- but that’s okay because that means they cooked it just now.

I can’t tell if this is weed or not...

What does it look like?

Weed.

Well then it’s probably weed.

Yup, yeah it’s weed.

My kink is responsible roommates.

Welcome to Florida: America’s Droopy Dick

I got two Juuls: one for the hood and one for the pool.

My friend sent me a bunch of ball pics and I accidentally replayed one... now he’s gonna think I’m gay.

YouTube searches:

> russian fails

> can you smoke adderall?

remsday