Welcome, Resident Tomb Rat

Casual tomb resider. Full time friend of the ghouls. Daylight come and me wanna go home. 🪰🐀 🪦

[sawed-on-shotgun]

unfortunate truth of reality is that oftentimes 15 year olds will say/do/believe some stupid bullshit because they are 15 but telling them that they believe that because they are 15 is probably the most counterproductive thing in the entire universe

[gumy-shark]

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

[fluffysheeple]

christian bad driver: my guardian angel watches over me, I don't need to look before I merge

atheist bad driver: I will rely on my own skill to see myself safely home after a mere 8 drinks

agnostic bad driver: no one knows where all these dents and scratches came from

[watasnak]

what the fuck are my mutuals doing

[aflo]

Settlers of catan

[thecinamonroe]

Marilyn Monroe photographed at her apartment by Philippe Halsman, 1952.

[squeakitties]

[necromosss]

As the person who got their R keyboard broken and the world mocked me for being forced to use the uwu language as replacement

My condolences

[commodore-64]

put that back

[the-davest-of-uncles]

National Lampoon, October 1985

[adamsmasher]

WE WERE ON JEOPARDY!!!!!!!!!!

[rouge-the-bat]

thank you for coming to my this #mythis

[dreadwedge]

salad is mostly items

[verminfang]

Thinking about a vampire dude bro who won't drink girl blood- because he's afraid it will estroginise him soy products style- getting trapped in a mental cage when he learns vampire dude who only bites other dudes reads as gay

[blagzposting]

[gendernewtral]

can we go back to acknowledging that ignoring someone’s chosen pronouns is always misgendering, even when you’re using neutral ones instead

[fishing-princess]

[valencians]

fantasy: the kingdom has been ruled by one family for 10,000 years

science fiction: a new species evolved in 30 years

[ballofstress9]

[soapydoll]

Did I ever talk abt the time i was at a bdsm club and one of the pups was on all fours and barking and being cute and the dom on scene was like “hi puppy! Do you do any tricks?” And he said “I can beatbox!”

[soapydoll]

I was like. Doubled over incapacitated laughing the entire time. He was really good and a big sweetheart and I felt kinda bad but I couldn’t stop thinking “why the am I getting the beatboxing puppy unskippable cutscene at the bdsm club”

[sandmandaddy69]

[n0stalgos]

There is not even time for a quick jerk off

[jame7t]

I feel like an alien tomb would be sooooo fucking cool until a alien mummy gets up and chase you

[cryptotheism]

This happened to me. You think mummies are slow as fuck and you can outrun them. But alien mummies have a ray gun.

[jame7t]

do not trauma dump on my posts please