I REVIEW TUMBLR POSTS

I review Tumblr posts with no clear criteria. Don't think to hard about it.

[undead-robins]

Boop boop motherfuckers!

[reviewing-posts]

I must -ACK- say that -OWCH- the use of -ARGH- a punchy -YEOWCH- motion -OWWW- paired with -OUGH- a concise -GAHH- choice of -ARRGH- words -OWOWOW- really -OWCHIE- works.

[RATING: OW]

[pissvortex]

[reviewing-posts]

The Pope made a Catholicism into a fucking anime girl. Christianity is cool again.

[RATING: 8]

[lostinthelegs]

(yawns on u)

[reviewing-posts]

Ah! Oh goodness ! Far too many chickens for me. Those legs seem too long. It feels like they're watching me. Eughc. I am uncomfortable. They don't look real and I've raised chickens. I am getting uncanny valley from a chicken.

[RATING: 5]

[veggiedaddy]

not to be controversial but respect trans women or die by my sword

[bettieleetwo]

and my bow

[and-then-theres-that]

And my axe

[ambratwhurst]

[thegreatlazule]

And my daggers

[shakespeare-official-account-de]

And my rapier and matchsticks.

[i-identify-as-an-ominous-threat]

And my kitchen knife

[autotheist-of-ominous-threats]

and my hands

[this-threat-is-ominous]

And my aro beam

[love-you-ominous-threats]

And my Horrors

[redundant-ominious-threats]

And at least one weapon

[priest-of-ominous-threats]

And my cross

[law-of-ominous-threats]

and my rifle.

[scp-threats-is-back]

And my SCPs

[autotheist-of-ominous-threats]

and my scythe

[the-weird-kids-next-door]

and my cane

[ash-the-tiefling]

AND MY GOATS

[terri-theslime13]

And my spear

[sapphicslender]

and my sapphic pages

[yahooo-official]

and my (extremely cool) greatsword

[crystallizedmoon]

And my sickle

[reviewing-posts]

And my scathing review

[RATING(POST): 10] [RATING(DISRESPECTFUL INDIVIDUAL): -3]

[alittlebitinsane]

So earlier i heard someone say “Toasters always get notes, its like a rule” and that made me want to do a science expiriment

I present upon thee, toaster.

[does-this-please-the-omnissiah]

Analysis complete: Toaster detected

🏆A toaster! Omnissiah be Praised!

[same-pic-rick-roll]

The attraction of toasters: insights into why tumblr users disproportionately reblog toaster pics.

[posts-with-10000-notes-in-spirit]

current note count: 25

[reviewing-posts]

A toaster is present. I am more or less obligated to leave a shining review. I would leaving a shining review even if I weren't obligated though. Fabulous work.

[RATING:11]

[gimmick-remover]

Here is a backstory

[reviewing-posts]

Thoroughly unimpressed. Subpar, overused cliche tragic backstory. Not to mention the Anti-Gimmick message, which is distasteful to say the very least. The writers really dropped the ball on this one.

[RATING: 2.3]

[cad-comic]

[reviewing-posts]

The punchline is clever, yes, but I would've quite enjoyed a bit more comic to be perfectly honest.

[RATING: 6.8]

[daydreaming-scheming-demon]

tumblr staff will let the thousands of porn bots on here run rampant yet will take down trans comics with no actual nudity

i originally reblogged this post, but since staff took it down you can't fucking see my reblog anymore. well i liked this comic, i want it on my blog, and it does not include any fucking nudity. especially compared to all the straight up porn staff allows to go free

so here it is

untitled by Pas (paxiti), all pages from May 23, 2018 to June 22, 2023

[official-megumin]

I will never not loathe how the internet took that one panel from this comic. You know the one, and turned it into pretty much THE "trap" on the internet.

They took an explicitly trans comic, and turned it into a transmisogynistic joke.

And it's such a cute and loving comic too, and it was weaponised to irreperably damage the way trans people, especially trans women. Are viewed online.

I hope the people responsible for it is made pay for it some day

[reviewing-posts]

A tale as wholesome as sugar is sweet, twisted by those who'd wish ill upon those to whom the comic is intended. Truly, it makes one's blood boil, which makes the sight of the peice as it was originally made all the more delightful. Megumin's lament on the fate of the peice is entirely warranted.

[RATING: 9.7]

[dark-deathrage]

you're a stupid fucking anti-sjw lol. This blog is stupid. I hate you crackers white people SUCK go suck a dick.

looks like I triggered more sjws. Keep sending these asks they only fuel my logic. 

Never forget the guy who didn’t remember to hit anon before sending himself hate mail

[pyrose-the-flame]

Love that we’re still dragging the poor fuckers corpse around years later so no one ever forgets their shameful mistake lol

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: ’ a t cg at- . T g t. at cac t C g c a c. tgg . g t a t gc. gt t g ’t t t a g at a tat ’ t aggg t c c a a at gt t a ta

Closest match: Mangifera indica lysophospholipid acyltransferase LPEAT1-like (LOC123229584), transcript variant X5, mRNA Common name: Mango

(image source)

[reviewing-posts]

Incredible. Simply incredible. A villain getting his comeuppance at the hands of his own hubris, fated to be forever ridiculed at the hands of those he thought himself so high above. Additionally, hellsitegenetics is always a pleasant sight.

[RATING: 9.8/10]

[lobsterenthusiastt]

eat cement

[crunchy-possum-soup2]

eat cement

[iregreteverythingpleasehelpme]

eat cement

[rp-rs]

eat cement

[the-real-gamefreak]

eat cement

[actual-aspec-military]

eat cement

[definitely-canada]

eat cement

[shakespeare-official-account-de]

eateth cem’nt

[gb-tesco-official]

eat cement

[walmart-the-official]

ate cement

[bingle-official]

eating cement

[k-f-c-official]

now offering five dollar fried cement fried cement fill ups!

[reviewing-posts]

[WHEN IT COMES TO THE CEMENT THERE ARE NO WORDS. IT SIMPLY IS A MASTERPIECE OF BOTH NARRATIVE AND FLAVOR. IT'S SO VERY INSIGHTFUL. I MAY NEVER EXPERIENCE ANYTHING LIKE IT AGAIN: 9/10]

[assigning-voidpets-to-posts]

You get...

A Residual Mischief 2!

(Mythical Fire Vivid, Variant 42)

[reviewing-posts]

[oh hell yeah]

[i-draw-this-idiot-devious-face]

[reviewing-posts]

[FOG/10: THE FOG]

[neil-gaiman]

I just realized I sent a public apology that was meant to have been sent as a private apology. I've deleted it.

[reviewing-posts]

[10/10: IT'S OKAY MR. GAIMAN WE FORGIVE YOU]

[jadejemdoesstuff]

I had an interesting night last night

[under-the-arch]

I’m so glad I have tumblr gold so I can view this post

[irishironclad]

Tumblr gold users rise up

[oldsgie-deactivated20260302]

me when people don’t know that tumblr gold is real

[ash-the-tiefling]

I love tumblr gold

[thaliawalkstothepark]

What the hellllllll?

[pomuf]

what, do you not have tumblr gold yet?

[thexie-and-stars]

I love tumblr gold

[thesillyguyy]

I love tumblr gold

[f3v3r-dr3am]

I love tumblr gold

[gummy-axolotl]

I love Tumblr Gold

[xx-ladybug-xx]

I love tumblr gold

[theautumnaldemon]

I love Tumblr gold

[truell]

I love tumblr god

[sansthesexyman23-deactivated202]

live, laugh, Tumblr Gold

[eldritchcats]

i love eating Tumblr Gold

[flowey-the-lanternflower55]

Same

[discoveredreality]

i love tumblr gold

[ambrosiaoctober]

i love tumblr gold

[tens-radioactive-left-shoe]

i love tumblr gold

[yaoicortez]

i love tumblr gold

[transboysgetknives]

omg tumblr gold is awesome look at this post i found there

[rosees3ray]

I love tumblr gold

[totallytesco]

I love Tumblr gold

[the-official-publix-deactivated]

i love tumblr gold

[the-one-and-only-pornhub]

tumblr gold was my best investment on this hellsite

[jollibee-real]

tumblr gold my bzzzeloved

[shakespeare-official-account-de]

tumblr gold supremacy

[slimylittlemaggot]

Tumblr gold really was the one purchase I will never regret. I might regret getting my own house, paying for student loans, or getting myself donuts, but I’ll never regret Tumblr Gold.

[reviewing-posts]

[10/10: TUMBLR GOLD TRULY WAS A REMARKABLE DECISION. PROBABLY ONE OF THE BEST TUMBLR EVER MADE. EVERY POST THERE IS BANGER AFTER BANGER. NO TERFS, NO HATERS, NO BAD VIBES. I CAN'T RECOMMEND IT ENOUGH.]

[xeppeli]

lahore pigeons are some of the most visually appealing birds out there. like in terms of visual design. very minimalist, good contrast.

[xeppeli]

[tunnaa-unnaa]

Too bad Lahore pigeons are a domestic breed and don’t appear in the wild at all. Some equally balanced wild colorations include

Pygmy Falcon

Great Hornbill

Wallcreeper

and

Black-throated Loon

[xeppeli]

this is a good addition to this post. thank you for this birds educations

[fuckingconversations]

I would like to submit the following additions to the world of exceptional bird color design:

Cedar Waxwing

Red Crowned Crane

Brahminy Kite

Green Tree Swallow (I mean seriously - those are metallic teal feathers against stark white. Damn.) 

Bali Mynah

And, last but certainly not least, the cutest fucking puffball on this planet earth:

The Korean Crow-Tit

[ohthisismuchworse]

I’d also like to contribute some pretty awesome birds

Hooded Pitta (or as like to call them little olives)

Coua

Mot-Mot

The Blue Crown Pigeon (the biggest pigeon)

[scoutology]

good post

[chopinsbian-deactivated20181029]

@ilovegirlsalways

[lonewolf574]

@candiceirae

[candiceirae]

I’m fond of the Golden Breasted Starling,

the Golden Pheasant,

and the Oriental Dwarf Kingfisher.

[thelightreturns]

@izzyovercoffee

[camwyn]

May I present the most fabulous turkey in the world, the Ocellated Turkey?

[etchif]

Might I add

The Violet-backed starling

[adisabledzombie]

these are some great birds i think were done

[reviewing-posts]

[10/10: GREAT BIRDS. I LIKE THEM.]

[lobsterenthusiastt]

eat cement

[crunchy-possum-soup2]

eat cement

[iregreteverythingpleasehelpme]

eat cement

[rp-rs]

eat cement

[the-real-gamefreak]

eat cement

[actual-aspec-military]

eat cement

[definitely-canada]

eat cement

[shakespeare-official-account-de]

eateth cem’nt

[gb-tesco-official]

eat cement

[walmart-the-official]

ate cement

[bingle-official]

eating cement

[k-f-c-official]

now offering five dollar fried cement fried cement fill ups!

[reviewing-posts]

[WHEN IT COMES TO THE CEMENT THERE ARE NO WORDS. IT SIMPLY IS A MASTERPIECE OF BOTH NARRATIVE AND FLAVOR. IT'S SO VERY INSIGHTFUL. I MAY NEVER EXPERIENCE ANYTHING LIKE IT AGAIN: 9/10]

[justanotherbattyhere]

ALRIGHT MAY BE A LITTLE LATE TO THE TREND BUT FUCK IT WE BALL

IF THIS POST GETS TO IDK LETS SAY 12K NOTES BY MARCH 27TH, I WILL CHANGE MY URL TO SOMETHING MORE BEFITTING, SINCE I NO LONGER IDENTIFY AS ENBY/NB

SOEM RULES

IF YOU ARE A MUTUALS, NO MORE THAN FOUR RB’S, THREE COMMENTS, BUT TAGGING OTHERS IS FINE

IF YOU ARE JSUT A REGULAR OLD FOLLOWER OR JSUT SOME PERSON WHO FOUND THIS, DO WHAT YOU WANT

NO HAIKUBOT BAIT

GIMICK BLOGS ARE ALOUD TO BE TAGGED BUT ONLY ONCE PER BLOG PER PERSON

TIME TO WATCH MY NOTIFS SUFFER

[windows-nt-4-point-0]

gonna rb here bc why not

(I fucked up, I already know it)

[putting-pomni-in-places]

Followers?

[justanotherbattyhere]

POMNI NOOOOOO

[putting-pomni-in-places]

Pomni yes.

[putting-bubble-in-places]

@putting-chell-in-places @the-firey-painter

[reviewing-posts]

[8/10: GET THEIR ASS]

[striders]

ㅤ

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified:

Closest match:

[i-say-ok]

ok.

[the-purple-painter]

This post has been purpled!

[the-disemvoweler]

 

[reviewing-posts]

[ / : ]