Shrimp Central

(they/them) in my 20s | I'm pretty much 100% on mobile so I cant use programs to tell me if people are shitty. might reblog nsfw stuff and i often forget to tag if it registers as mild to me, so minors not welcome

[thewindowofthesummerhouse]

Karina Refrynn

[anxeious]

[feldfrog]

Small amounts of money are great for things like rice and beans to stay alive . Huge amounts of money are great for things like having your every perversion gratified

[portaltomb]

this lettuce smells like dog

[iamoutofideas]

you bought dog lettuce

[swarnpert]

[thedreadpiratecam]

microdosing hell by being awake and literate

[foldingfittedsheets]

My girlfriend and I are laying quietly in the pitch black bedroom. In a soft whisper with no inflection, I said, “Someone is here.”

My girlfriend’s whole body stiffens and they go, “What the FUCK!”

They didn’t feel the little kitty feet I felt or have the context so instead of understanding a cat was joining us in bed they thought I was signaling the start of a horror movie.

[great-and-small]

Yeah okay there are like 11 species of heron native to the USA and yes fine I’ve only managed to spot 10 of those species. You might think I’m bitter about that one species evading me but I’m not. I’m actually the Least Bittern person about it in the entire world

[lyriumrain]

Another wonderfull secret

[taur]

Texting your ex 😍

[excitementshewrote]

[sobcat]

[virtualgirladvance]

F

[ace-disgrace-on-the-case]

U

[knight-errant-girl]

N

[toa-arania]

G

[robotgirlservos]

P

[flareonfloof]

[persianmom-deactivated20251026]

what will it be, boss? the comfort of misery or the pain of change?

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

[redarmyscreaming]

[hotcrossedfangs]

[shounenchild]

my favorite part of this whole thing tbh

[unpretty]

there was a chicken loose on the golf course so they just. brought it in. to the office.

[unpretty]

you can't argue with her work ethic

[dogsuffrage]

[redstonedust]

sticks my finger in the barrel of your gun so it backfires on you looney toons style but the gun moaned and now none of us know what genre we're in.

[calware]

i really love this genre of image

[lunarthesugarglider]

[villaqueen]

The best part of that video is that the owner found the ORIGINAL plush later on the beach and took another video with it after their grandmother stitched it back up

[i-am-a-lonely-nerd]

I love the death grip after the toy was fixed up. Lessons were learned. Try to steal it this time you fucking bird. I dare you.