Breakups Hurt | Choi Su-bong
Ch 5: you're your own, kid
Su-bong feels the cold sweat ran down his spine.
The anxiety he was feeling wasn't compare to anything. He feared your teammates fucking up and get you killed.
Pairing: Choi Su-bong x female!reader
Genre: squid game au! exes to lovers!
warnings: cussing ig, this one had like no angst! su-bong doesn't have his drug locket. no use of y/n. there's mostly thanos's real name is used. usual squid game stuff.
YOU AND PLAYER 222 WERE looking around. The other players has already started forming teams.
It seems like everybody had the same thoughts of finding a better a solid team with people with enough strengths as they have no idea what game they would be playing.
Which means there weren't many people who'd like you or player 222 in their teams.
And honestly, you can't really blame that. Even though it does make you anxious.
Your eyes moved around before setting on a group of people. Without thinking you grabbed 222's jacket and took her to them.
"Uhh excuse me.." you get all of their attention. You point at 222 before saying— "Can she join you guys..? she's..." You hesitantly looked over at her. Not knowing if she wants them to know if she's pregnant or not but you decided to say it anyway. Maybe these men will be kind enough to let her join? "She's pregnant."
For a few seconds they were all froze. You were starting to think they're thinking of a way to let you both down gently.
They look sceptically at each other before player 456 nodded and then all they all nod in confirmation that she could join.
"Thank you." 222 bow her head, greatful. You also smile at them.
"Best of luck." You said to her before taking steps back. She looks at you a little longer but didn't said anything.
Okay- now it was time for you to look for team of your own. You walk and look if anyone need one player. It takes everything in you to just start a conversation with somebody but now you have no choice but to actually approach somebody. The anxiety was gnawing at you from inside..
You think social anxiety would definitely kill you before these game could.
"Uh excuse me. Do you need one more member?" You ask when you saw four people, three men and one woman. They all look at each other in a manner that scream they don't want you to join them. You awkward continue "oh. It's okay if you don't.." with that you turn away.
Fuck. You feel like crying or dying from the embarassment.
Socializing has never been something you were good at. Taking up the courage to go to someone and actually talk to them just for them to reject, and feels like they are judging you, is making you want to hide. Where nobody can see you.
"Yah! You can join us. We need one more player." You heard his voice from behind you.
You don't know what to make of this.
You turned around to face him.
On su-bong's right, There was the guy from before who introduced himself as nam-gyu. Besides nam-gyu, there was a guy who you don't know. There was beautiful woman on his left.
You feel something strange. Something that you can't name. But you can only guess it's something between anger and confusion.
"Thank you. But I'll take my chance somewhere else." You said. Your voice neutral. Like this wasn't your ex you were just crying over not even twenty four hours ago asking you if you wanna join his team. Your eyes not looking into his but at literally anything.
"common! it's just for the game. no personal feelings." He insisted.
"i already told you no." You didn't stick around for to gauge his reaction and walked away
Cause that seem more easier
"Okay— we need one more player" nam-gyu muttered as he looked around for one another player.
Su-bong knows he is looking for a guy cause he wasn't exactly happy when su-bong asked 380 to join them. Said something about how it could be disadvantage to take woman in their team when they don't even know what the game would be.
Su-bong didn't really cared about that that much. He pretty much just walked up to first person he laid his eyes on. And that turn out to be player 380.
It didn't take him long to find you from across the room.
You were looking for a team. (Obviously)
He could see the way you were getting more anxious by the seconds.
Your eyes looking here and there. Your steps flattering in hesitation like you were unsure if you should even walk ahead. Your hands nervously pulling the sleeve of your jacket.
Without thinking, his legs took him towards your direction. He knows his teammates are following without even looking.
He tucked his hands in his pockets. Trying to appear as nonchalant as he could be.
"Yah! You can join us. We need a one more player." You turn around to face him.
Your face unreadable as you took in his teammates. Though he noticed how you didn't even once met his eyes. Your voice void of any emotions when you said "thanks but I'll take my chance somewhere else."
He knew you were not gonna just accept his offer this easily but he can't help.
He don't think there are good enough people for you to join. He'd rather you join him, if the game required teams.
"common! It's just for the game. No personal feelings." He add, trying to change your mind, voice still as if he couldn't care any less but he was hoping you'd say yes.
But his hopes didn't last longer when you said "i already told you no."
He was about to say something else but you didn't bothered staying to listen to it and turn around walked away
Su-bong unfortunately had to let another man join his team, His name was gyeong-su, but he was his fan so it wasn't that bad.
The game starts. The first team fucked up and was eliminated. Su-bong feels the cold sweat ran down his spine.
The anxiety he was feeling wasn't compare to anything. He feared your teammates fucking up and get you killed.
This was exactly why he wanted you to join him. Atleast he knows he would be winning. But now he have to just sit and pray that the team you eventually got into weren't noobs and knows how to play these children games.
He feared for you safety.
Su-bong sat up straighter when you and your team came to play.
He instantly recognise one of your teammate. And—
It was the bastard. MG coin.
He bitterly thought to himself why you couldn't find any other players.
It didn't help that you were gonna playing the forth game and he was gonna play the fifth one. Which results you directly besides him. With your arms intertwined.
The ugly feeling he feels at the sight gnaw in his chest so badly that he had to take deep breathe to calm himself down.
The first three players cleared their games quickly which su-bong was relieved for.
Su-bong nibble on his bottom lip unconsciously. You had plenty of time right now.
You messed up at the first trial. You look so worried that he almost want to walk there and reassure you that you do have lots of time.
But instead he had to watch as the asshole MG coin and the other player at your side try to assure you by saying you've got a time, no need to rush.
You cleared the game on the second trial and su-bong cheared loudly for you. Fuck the other thoughts. He was just happy you cleared the game.
It was MG coin's turn. He gets up to three kicks before the thing dropped to the floor. He picked it up and again tried but failed.
"Motherfucker. How hard is it for him to kick it?" Su-bong feels himself saying it in anger.
He watch as you try to encourage him. Even give him the tip to kick it with front side of his heel.
Su-bong digged his nails in his palm. He can't even wish for this bastard to die as you're in his team (Unfortunately).
Your team cleared the game. The other players cheared loudly for you all. Your team was lead outside of the room.
At some point your eyes met his and su-bong thinks his eyes made it up or he saw worry in your eyes.
"who was that?" Nam-gyu voice pulled him out of his reverie.
He spare him a glance questioningly.
"That girl from before. who is she?" He lean back on his hands before continuing, "well she was kinda hot to be honest— you know? like those girls on vogue cover. You think she'd—"
he stopped mid sentance seeing the way his friend's face darkened threatenedly.
"Wait— don't tell. that's her. Isn't it?" Nam-gyu said, suprise and amusement dripping in his voice. He huff out something like amused chuckle. "Oh! So this is the girl you've been all weird and broody about huh! yeah, I can see why." Nam-gyu muttered the last part to himself.
"Shut the fuck up, will you?" seems like that was all su-bong could come up with, at this moment.
"Well, what happened?" Nam-gyu asked. The curiousity still creeping in his voice despite the way he tries to be nonchalant about it.
"Nothing that concern you." Nam-gyu gets the total opposite of a answer he was hoping for.
"Ah common. I though we were bros now that we bonded over, thanks to that crypto asshole?" Nam-gyu insisted. Hoping su-bong would finally fill him with information. nam-gyu continue when su-bong stayed silent. "really? After all the alcohol I let you have for free?"
Su-bong sound exhausted when he sighed for the nth time. "Well. I fucked up, i guess."
That was all su-bong could tell nam-gyu. He fucked up almost, like, everything at this point.
Before nam-gyu could inquire more, it was time for their turn.
"you were good out there." a girl's voice pulled you out of your thoughts on your way back to the dormitory.
"huh" it took you a minute to realise she was making a small talk, with you. ah! she was one of the player you teamed up with. She played ddakji. "Oh, thank you. You were good too." You were definitely not good, normally you'd be good but the anxiety made you undoubtedly fumble and all. Anyways, She was just being kind.
"thank you!! I think ddakji is my game! I almost made the ddakji guy, you know in the suit?, penny less too" she excitedly said and chuckled. "I think i should just quite soccer and be full time ddakji player!" You couldn't help but laugh a little along with her.
"you play soccer?" You question.
You guys reach the dormitory.
"ah well, used to." she replied.
You both sat down on the bed
"why?" you curiously asked but soon realised how you should mind your own business but before you could open your mouth she reply—
"had a accident. needed a surgery but you know, the same ol' money problem." you could see she was trying to be nonchalant about it.
For a moment, she made you forget about su-bong. For a moment or so, you both sat there and talk and talk about anything.
Your eyes suddenly catch something. You look at her and ask "you voted to stay?"
She glanced at the 'O' on her jacket and shrugs sheepishly "sorry. But i thought just one more game? But now, no more game i swear! I wanna go home. like who knows if my family is going crazy finding me or something?" She chuckled softly with a fond look on her face as if she's remembering her family. You give her a soft smile of your own.
Sometimes later, su-bong and his team finally came back after completing the game successfully.
You don't want to admit it to yourself but you found your tense shoulders relaxing.
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