Thingy
So this is a thing I wrote a while ago, I can’t remember why but I read it back and thought it was quite sad. I am no writer but I do like to write sometimes but I don’t think I’m good by any means.
This can be quite triggering to some and this is not something I have gone through so it’s probably very inaccurate so sorry for that as well.
Anyways here is the sad Thingy I wrote.
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"Hey you're okay, it's not that bad, okay?" My voice cracking as I applied pressure to the gaping wound in my brothers' stomach trying to stop the blood flow but it was no use, his warm thick blood just kept pouring through my fingers, staining his clothes as well as my own. "Stay awake. Stay with me. The ambulance is on the way. You just need to stay awake, Jay, please." I begged him as I pushed harder and harder into the wound hoping that it would somehow help, knowing that it wouldn't.
"It's okay, Lou, It's okay." I barely heard the words leave his mouth over my sobs. "I, I love you, I will always be here, okay?" He was giving up, I could see the colour fading from his face becoming a pale white. More sobs racked my body as my brother took his last ragged breaths becoming limp underneath me.
"Jay, JAY! No no no. You can't do this, not today! We graduate tomorrow! Please, you can't just leave and skip that!" I scream to no one in particular. No response is what I got. His chest was as steady as a rock, no longer going up and down in a steady rhythm showing me that there was no sign of life left. "Jay, please!" I begged, gripping the front of his shirt as I tried to pull him up as if he was only playing around, that this was some type of game he was playing and I was just on the receiving end of his harsh prank.
The feeling of someones' hand of my shoulder is what took my eyes off of my brother. I looked up and saw that it was an officer who was standing behind me, a solemn look on his face. "Miss Jones, I need you to come with me okay? So the paramedics can do their job now." His voice was calm like there wasn't a body in front of him, My brothers' body! How could he expect me to just move away and leave him on his own?
"No, no I - I need to be here, with him in case he wakes up somehow!" I shook my head, going back to looking at my best friend, my world just laying there looking so peaceful yet in so much pain still. "I need to call Mum." The hard realisation just hit me that they don't know what's happened. My Mum and Dad don't know that one of their babies is laying here dead.
I looked behind me to see the cop was still there looking slightly more pained, "I need to call my Mum, Is that okay?" I asked. He held out his hand for me to take, nodding at me. I looked back at Jay before taking his hand, "I'll be back okay?" I said to myself as I went with the cop towards the end of the alley where it all happened.
"Do you want to use our phone?" The officer asked as we walked past paramedics and more cops all rushing over to my brother, hoping to somehow help him but we all knew that he was gone. My brother is gone and he isn't going to be coming back. I nodded at him, trying to wipe my hands on my shirt, wanting to get rid of the red, sticky blood which was staining them. "I'll get you some clean clothes to change into and a cloth for your hands." The officer said as we reached a parked ambulance. He handed me a phone before going over to a group of cops probably to ask for someone for new clothes.
My hands trembled as they tapped against the screen typing in the familiar number that I was forced to remember since we moved out here for college, a red smudge being left behind as I typed. My thumb hovered over the call button, I didn't know what to say to her if she picked up. How could I tell her that Jay was dead? That he did it to protect me? How could I tell my mother that one of her precious children who promised to be safe in the big city is now gone? That she won't be able to hear his voice again, hear his laugh or see the happy sparkle that was always in his eyes?
The green button was just staring at me, asking me to press it and to tell my Mum everything which has happened tonight. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. After what seemed like hours which was probably only a few minutes I pressed the button. The call tone started to ring in my ear as I held the phone up waiting for her to answer it. I wanted, I willed for her to just not pick it up because she didn't recognise the number or because she was busy but then her smooth, silky voice came through the line, "Hello?" A sob escaped my throat, that one simple word made me crack, it made the whole situation feel true and real, that it wasn't just some sick game or some joke that was being played against me.
"Mummy, I'm sorry." That was all I could say before even more sobs and cries came from inside me. I fell to the floor, not caring about the stinging in my knees as they came into contact with the pavement. "Mummy, I am so, so sorry. It was just supposed to be a short cut to get home a bit quicker but someone was there, it happened so quickly." I sobbed down into the phone as I held it against my now wet face.
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Yeah that’s it, I’m sorry if this hurts you in any way but I thought I would share it to see what other people think.
