Ritonavir's goofy (or evil) shenanigans

[ritonavir-catto]

Ritonavir's introduction post

Hi, i'm Ritonavir, the greatest miracle doctor in all of Cattopia, and a catto who may or may not have an evil alter ego who's scheming to take over the planet!

Anyway, sooooOOOOH GOD, I FEEL IT COMING!

THE SUDDEN SURGE OF ENERGY COMING AND CORRUPTION TAKING OVER MY H̶͙̭͇͌͛ͅE̸̠̿͝ą̷̖͎̙̀̊r̵̺͇͔͖̟͑̆̀̀̅t̸̬̑̔̀̋̄.̶̮͇̕.̵͍̈́͗.̸̧̬̳͌̋

Hello, inferior beings. I am Ritonavir (Type II), and my sole mission is to take over the world with brainwashed polymorphs. Don't mind my more flawed self up there, he is... frankly, a nuisance in my mind when i speak, shouting the opposite of everything "malevolent" i say in my mind, whatever that is. Anyway, I will not stop until the world is taken over by polymorphs.

Muahahahahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHhhhh...

Er, sorry about that, it happens sometimes. He's a bit of a nuisance, Form II, always bickering with my other 3 polymorphs in my mind like that, every single day, it makes me a little... deranged sometimes. Okay bye, i have an appointment with Octaplou about them being having really really bad cough. Get back soon!

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): uhh... who are you talking to, are you talking to Doctor Ritonavir, or me?

[ritonavir-catto]

i hate that they call me Doctor Ritonavir

I was talking to Ritonavir (I). But now let us get ready for the final battle.

[true-muonium]

(It's a normal day in Cattopia.)

(Little did anybody know, this was going to be one of the worst days (and also one of the most epic days) for all of the cattos.)

(True Muonium wakes up.)

*yawns* It's a great day.

Wait a second...

why is the sky red?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, hello, Cattopia!

Today is the day I rule Cattopia, so better go out with a bang, Cattopian leaders!

???: Not on my watch!

Huh?

*Portals appear everywhere*

[true-muonium]

WHAT IS GOING O-

*Sugar Rush by Azali starts playing*

Visit Original Link

Wha- AZALI music? I LOVE AZALI!

*Something comes out of one of the portals*

Wait a second... OTE FLUORINE!?

*Indeed, Dictator Fluorine does show up, on a flying aircraft, literally aurafarming in mid-air like friggin' Piccolo. I, the narrator, have absolutely no idea how she didn't fall off because of the all the air resistance. Yes, I had to break the fourth wall to show the absurdity of this. I am TOTALLY not gonna get that pay raise. GOSHDARNIT!*

(ooc: bahahaha this is the most over-the-top joke i have ever made and i love it)

*The Avengers' theme starts playing*

*Adamantium, Vibranium, "Tony Stark's New Element" and Uru show up*

*back to SUGAR RUSH because yes*

WHAT IS GOING O-

*And then True Muonium, Positronium, Protonium, and Diazide get summoned*

[ritonavir-catto]

what the fleepalooza

for the record, i have no idea why true muonium is here

But, 280,591 vs a measly 9? Not very close.

???: Well... heh... you'll see.

what?

*99% of Ritonavir's army explodes*

Ritonavir:

???: It turns out a LOT of your polymorphic army is very very unstable. Take Nordstrandite, for example. And there's more to come...

WHAT!? MORE!?

[true-muonium]

???: But first, it's time for the title-calling!

what does that mean

???: First off, Positronium, Guardian of Electromagnetism and Charge!

Positronium: ok nice that fits me

???: Second, Protonium, Guardian of Color Charge!

Protonium: nice

???: Third, True Muonium, uhhhh i guess eh has an omnitrix

oh yeah i can---

transform into skybox or---

Ant 2422----

etc etc

???: And fourth, me, THE GUARDIAN OF ██████████,

space-time.

*vordt of the boreal valley starts playing*

[ritonavir-catto]

GAH! The power, I feel it!

But we will never give up.

"But it refused..." ahh statement

shut up

[true-muonium]

*The camera pans to the graveyard.*

*Yes, there's a camera, don't question it.*

*A weirdly familiar figure rises out of one of the graves*

< Ninovium, guardian of False Truth >

Ninovium: H3110 C4770P14...

Ninovium: N0W MY 4rMY r153, R153!

*Ninovium gasps loudly*

Ninovium: 41484M1UM 41K411N1UM 4N610H31V371UM 4rC0N1UM 4573r1UM 4Ur0r1UM 4U53N1UM 4U57r1UM 83rZ311UM 80H3M1UM C4r011N1UM C0r0N1UM CYC10N1UM D4K1N D4VYUM D3C1P1UM D14N1UM D1DYM1UM D0r1N3 F10r3N71UM 6H10r51UM 6N0M1UM H31V371UM H35P3r1UM 1111N1UM 11M3N1UM 1UC1UM M45Ur1UM M01D4V1UM M0N1UM MUr1471CUM MUr1UM N38U11UM N3U7r0N1UM N3W70N1UM N1PP0N1UM P310P1UM P011N1UM P73N3 Pr07Y13 rU551UM 53r63N1UM 53QU4N1UM V1C70r1UM V1r61N1UM W451UM

*Every single catto that was once in those graves rises, staring blankly.*

*gee, that's VERY intimidating.*

[ritonavir-catto]

OH DAYUM

WHAT THE [🗣🗣🗣🗣]!? WHAT THE ACTUAL [🗣🗣🗣🗣]ING [🗣🗣🗣🗣]ITY [🗣🗣🗣🗣] [🗣🗣🗣🗣]!?

oh what the firetruck he swore

*the entire crowd of misdiscovered cattos marches and halts at the side of the battlefield*

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): uhh... who are you talking to, are you talking to Doctor Ritonavir, or me?

[ritonavir-catto]

i hate that they call me Doctor Ritonavir

I was talking to Ritonavir (I). But now let us get ready for the final battle.

[true-muonium]

(It's a normal day in Cattopia.)

(Little did anybody know, this was going to be one of the worst days (and also one of the most epic days) for all of the cattos.)

(True Muonium wakes up.)

*yawns* It's a great day.

Wait a second...

why is the sky red?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, hello, Cattopia!

Today is the day I rule Cattopia, so better go out with a bang, Cattopian leaders!

???: Not on my watch!

Huh?

*Portals appear everywhere*

[true-muonium]

WHAT IS GOING O-

*Sugar Rush by Azali starts playing*

Visit Original Link

Wha- AZALI music? I LOVE AZALI!

*Something comes out of one of the portals*

Wait a second... OTE FLUORINE!?

*Indeed, Dictator Fluorine does show up, on a flying aircraft, literally aurafarming in mid-air like friggin' Piccolo. I, the narrator, have absolutely no idea how she didn't fall off because of the all the air resistance. Yes, I had to break the fourth wall to show the absurdity of this. I am TOTALLY not gonna get that pay raise. GOSHDARNIT!*

(ooc: bahahaha this is the most over-the-top joke i have ever made and i love it)

*The Avengers' theme starts playing*

*Adamantium, Vibranium, "Tony Stark's New Element" and Uru show up*

*back to SUGAR RUSH because yes*

WHAT IS GOING O-

*And then True Muonium, Positronium, Protonium, and Diazide get summoned*

[ritonavir-catto]

what the fleepalooza

for the record, i have no idea why true muonium is here

But, 280,591 vs a measly 9? Not very close.

???: Well... heh... you'll see.

what?

*99% of Ritonavir's army explodes*

Ritonavir:

???: It turns out a LOT of your polymorphic army is very very unstable. Take Nordstrandite, for example. And there's more to come...

WHAT!? MORE!?

[true-muonium]

???: But first, it's time for the title-calling!

what does that mean

???: First off, Positronium, Guardian of Electromagnetism and Charge!

Positronium: ok nice that fits me

???: Second, Protonium, Guardian of Color Charge!

Protonium: nice

???: Third, True Muonium, uhhhh i guess eh has an omnitrix

oh yeah i can---

transform into skybox or---

Ant 2422----

etc etc

???: And fourth, me, THE GUARDIAN OF ██████████,

space-time.

*vordt of the boreal valley starts playing*

[ritonavir-catto]

GAH! The power, I feel it!

But we will never give up.

"But it refused..." ahh statement

shut up

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): uhh... who are you talking to, are you talking to Doctor Ritonavir, or me?

[ritonavir-catto]

i hate that they call me Doctor Ritonavir

I was talking to Ritonavir (I). But now let us get ready for the final battle.

[true-muonium]

(It's a normal day in Cattopia.)

(Little did anybody know, this was going to be one of the worst days (and also one of the most epic days) for all of the cattos.)

(True Muonium wakes up.)

*yawns* It's a great day.

Wait a second...

why is the sky red?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, hello, Cattopia!

Today is the day I rule Cattopia, so better go out with a bang, Cattopian leaders!

???: Not on my watch!

Huh?

*Portals appear everywhere*

[true-muonium]

WHAT IS GOING O-

*Sugar Rush by Azali starts playing*

Visit Original Link

Wha- AZALI music? I LOVE AZALI!

*Something comes out of one of the portals*

Wait a second... OTE FLUORINE!?

*Indeed, Dictator Fluorine does show up, on a flying aircraft, literally aurafarming in mid-air like friggin' Piccolo. I, the narrator, have absolutely no idea how she didn't fall off because of the all the air resistance. Yes, I had to break the fourth wall to show the absurdity of this. I am TOTALLY not gonna get that pay raise. GOSHDARNIT!*

(ooc: bahahaha this is the most over-the-top joke i have ever made and i love it)

*The Avengers' theme starts playing*

*Adamantium, Vibranium, "Tony Stark's New Element" and Uru show up*

*back to SUGAR RUSH because yes*

WHAT IS GOING O-

*And then True Muonium, Positronium, Protonium, and Diazide get summoned*

[ritonavir-catto]

what the fleepalooza

for the record, i have no idea why true muonium is here

But, 280,591 vs a measly 9? Not very close.

???: Well... heh... you'll see.

what?

*99% of Ritonavir's army explodes*

Ritonavir:

???: It turns out a LOT of your polymorphic army is very very unstable. Take Nordstrandite, for example. And there's more to come...

WHAT!? MORE!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Obsidian can literally one shot any catto since he is the true absolute solver, and please don't make him snap since he uses the full torrent of his abilities when snapping.

uhm... okay? is that important?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hey, guess what!

fofofoffofofofofoooffofofofoffoofffofoofofogowowogwwoogowgwowgowgoogwwowgowgogofofogowfogwofogwoffogowgaleleeleleleeleleelopopoppoppopopppoplegawolopfogwopogo

hahahahahaha

-fluorine (hgugughuuguhhuhuhguhuughuhguugguuhhuhgguguhuh)

uhm

uh

ughgfughghfughghlhglfgh gagalfgaflflg galfalfa gagalfgagfag figfigungdungfugfingfung

[ritonavir-catto]

(oh yea forgot to mention that im rp-ing as titanium-41 iydk)

ooc post btw

you should redesign your cattos to incorporate their uses irl tho tbh if they have no uses then thats fine

[ritonavir-catto]

you look like a mishapen fridge that went in a edgy undertale AU

uhhh... are you talking to me or ritonavir (ii)? i think youre talking to ii cuz... edgy defintely encapsulates part of his personality

very true btw

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): uhh... who are you talking to, are you talking to Doctor Ritonavir, or me?

[ritonavir-catto]

i hate that they call me Doctor Ritonavir

I was talking to Ritonavir (I). But now let us get ready for the final battle.

[true-muonium]

(It's a normal day in Cattopia.)

(Little did anybody know, this was going to be one of the worst days (and also one of the most epic days) for all of the cattos.)

(True Muonium wakes up.)

*yawns* It's a great day.

Wait a second...

why is the sky red?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, hello, Cattopia!

Today is the day I rule Cattopia, so better go out with a bang, Cattopian leaders!

???: Not on my watch!

Huh?

*Portals appear everywhere*

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): uhh... who are you talking to, are you talking to Doctor Ritonavir, or me?

[ritonavir-catto]

i hate that they call me Doctor Ritonavir

I was talking to Ritonavir (I). But now let us get ready for the final battle.

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Uhhh...Master... last time i remember our "army" only having 5 members...

[ritonavir-catto]

Don't worry, i recruited half of the entire polymorphic catto population just a few members...

are you sure

that statement was sarcastic aro bro cro dro ero fro gro hro iro jro kro lro mro nro oro pro qro rro sro tro uro vro wro xro yro zro

oh

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[true-muonium]

Pyrite: *looks purely stunned, then drops on the floor like a mannequin*

[ritonavir-catto]

...what is she doing?

I don't know, but maybe she was training with opossums.

uhh... *pokes her in the face a few times* ...yep, she's out cold.

*brings out the freakin' lazer gun from PART II*

*nyeow nyEoW NYEOWONOWNOWNYONYONYORRRRRrRrRrRrGGGGGGgRRrRrGgGg KA-PLOWNJNJNJNJDNDNDNDNRNDRNBRRRRAAAAAA-perfectly_cut_echoy_scream.ogg*

uhh... dude i think that did the job

ya think⸮

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (II): Actually, no, but I DO have a map of Chemical City, so i'm just gonna search there...

*30 minutes of searching later*

Aspirin (II): AHA! Found it! 7031 Brimstone St.

(ooc: do NOT take this address as canon, i just made it up, and if someone actually lives on a 7031 brimstone st, it was a coincidence)

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, lesgo

*5 minutes later*

*shows up to her door*

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[true-muonium]

AspⅡrin (II): err hi

[ritonavir-catto]

hmmm... I don't know where Pyrite lives... do you know, Aspirin (II)?

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[true-muonium]

Aspirin (sonnettheseacoat): why are you BACK!?

[ritonavir-catto]

Hello, Aspirin.

*breaks them with a hammer*

*rebuilds them piece-by-piece like a lego set, but not perfectly*

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: ... *starts crying*

*gets evaporated etc etc*

Yellow Arsenic: BRO HELP I NEED TO BE IN A COOLER

[ritonavir-catto]

okay, okay, fine, fine...

*puts him in a cooler*

[ritonavir-catto]

It is time...

Time to take OVER THE WORLD!!! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

dude, that's so corny, how are we supposed to eat the thousand microwave popcorn bags in here

no one cares dude--WAIT A THOUSAND!? HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THAT MANY!?

form iv got them on a whim, idk how the delivery dude (delvi) even got here lmao

err ok anyway TIME TO CALL THE MEMBERS

*shows up to Iron's room*

Hello Ferrite...

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- WHO ARE YOU!? AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME BY MY LEGAL NAME!?

(ooc: i enjoyed making that joke)

[ritonavir-catto]

*chucks iron into the furnace*

Welcome back, Austenite.

[true-muonium]

Iron: WHA- I'mNOtaUstenite-

Austenite: Hello, master.

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, to Tin's room.

[ritonavir-catto]

*fills the room with dry ice*

Oh great tin pest, infect this impure form...

*stabs a piece of alpha-tin into his skull*

[true-muonium]

*Tin wakes up*

Tin: Wha- WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Tin: WAIWAIWAIWIAIAIIWIA WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS

*gets stabbed in the skull*

*yellow liquid splatters everywhere*

Tin: *Tin cracks and splinters violently, causing extreme pain and suffering for him* GAH!!! ÆAAAAHGHGH AAGH AAAAA HELPHELPHP AAAÆÆFGHFGHGHAAAAAAAAA AAAAGHGGHGGH GRAHAAAGH AÆAAAAAAA AAGHGHAGHghgh-----

*one final crack, and Tin splinters into dull gray pieces*

[ritonavir-catto]

Now, we will begin the transformation.

*pulls out a book labeled "Dark Runic Spells"*

*pours yellow "blood" onto the shards of brittle material*

*clears throat*

ᛋᛏᚨᚾᚾᚢᛗ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚠᛟᚱᛗᚨᚱᛖ ᚠᚱᚨᚷᛁᛚᛖᛗ ᛟᛒᛋᚲᚢᚱᚢᛗ ᛗᚨᛚᚢᛗ ᛋᚨᛝᚢᛁᚾᛖᛗ!!!!!

Dude... WHAT DID YOU EVEN DO!?

Just watch.

[true-muonium]

*The grey shards float and orbit in the air*

*A blinding light fills the room*

Gray Tin: hello master what shall i do

[ritonavir-catto]

Nothing yet, we shall call the members.

[true-muonium]

Gray Tin: ok

[ritonavir-catto]

Let's go to Arsenic's room first.

[true-muonium]

Arsenic: who ARE YOU, A GLORIFIED MEDICINE BOTTLE?

[ritonavir-catto]

haha good one

shut up arsenic the sole purpose you were created by oberorka was to show that when we get angry we glow from our emission spectra

*pulls out a frickin' microwave*

*evaporates Arsenic*

*pulls out a frickin' captain cold gun*

*freezes an element matto*

*depositions Arsenic*