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Most of you that were following me in 2013 will remember me talking about Coven Guy.
Joseph L Anderson Jr is Coven Guy.
And I always thought that there was something skeezy about him, but I had no proof that he was doing anything worth reporting. Now I’m glad that he’s been turned over to the authorities, but I wish I’d had evidence sooner before someone got hurt.
But since I can’t change what happened, I will detail some of the behaviors that were huge red flags for me in hopes that other people know what to stay away from. The pagan and witchcraft communities have a lot of sexual predators in them because there a good number of them are fairly young or are looking for someone to help them find their way. There are lots of different signs that someone might be there for this reason, but that’s another article entirely.
The very first thing he did when I met him was do my numerology chart and my astrology chart. I’ve had them done before but I always like to see what kinds of differences there are in people’s interpretations, so I consented. However, this did mean that I had to give him my birth name, which I no longer go by. Even when I expressed a preference for a nickname, he insisted on calling me by my birth name. He either ignored my preference or did not respect my choice.
When he did my numerology and astrology chart, he claimed that he had been studying it for years. But when he did it, the words were lifted straight from other authors. I did notice some alterations to the descriptions, especially when it came to ‘what your sign is attracted to.’ He would play up those attributes throughout the night.
Though the discussion group was really just intended to be a bunch of like-minded people hanging out and occasionally talking about magic. Regardless of this, he kind of asserted himself as the leader and made a majority of the discussion about him.
Though I’d been a practicing pagan for a few years by then and had settled myself into my pagan identity, he insisted that I needed to do a year-and-a-day and that I needed a teacher. He, of course, told me that he would be a great mentor for me because ‘we have a good male-female energy balance.’ He said this after about knowing me for fifteen minutes.
He would try his hardest to sell himself as the wisest guy in the room. Claiming that he learned about chakras and astral travel from a ‘real, red-blooded American Indian’ (problematic like woah). Told us that the reason that Ouija boards were evil was because they were made with wood from the Elder tree and ‘you should never cut an elder down without permission from The Goddess.’ (Pretty sure that the pressboard Hasbro uses is made with pine sawdust and lint.) In one bizarre conversation he claimed that the shop was haunted and that he could feel the ghost’s presence, often speaking on the ghost’s behalf and making it more and more menacing such as ‘he collected… teeth and he’s looking for… something. Something big and important.’ (The shop used to sell instruments, Joey. He’s probably looking or a tuba.) And since he could talk to the ghost, he could protect us from the ghost.
“I believe that a woman’s womb makes them more magical inherently because of their innate ability to create life. I have nothing but respect for women.” This was said to me, but in the next few moments he said to another person: “Man, why are all the bitches in South Bend crazy?!”
He flirted with pretty much every woman, regardless of age, but he focused on me because I look a little young and somewhat naive despite at the time being in my mid 20′s. And every time he got flirty I would ignore him, until politeness didn’t work and then I started getting rude. And then rudeness didn’t work so I had to tell him, several times, that I was a lesbian in a relationship and in no way interested in him. It seemed to work until he found himself a girlfriend. He kept bringing up the fact that she’s bisexual and hinting that he wanted a threesome.
He kept inviting me to these like… parties where they would all take ‘journeying drugs’ together, and they would all be these drugs I had never heard of before. And when I went to research them, there would be no information on them. So it seemed like he was making up names to things to be the authority on them.
And that’s about when I stopped hanging out with these people.
So here’s a summation of what I experienced from this particular manipulative person, so that when these red flags start flying someone can intercede.
Does not respect the word ‘no.’ Even in non-sexual situations- if he doesn’t respect your refusal in small ways, he may not respect it at all
Catering behavior to suit what he thinks you will respond to best. Presenting himself in a way that does not seem genuine.
Asserting himself as the authority, taking the leadership role when its not necessary, talking up his accomplishments.
Using fear as a motivator tool for respect (the ghost thing I was talking about.)
Plays on your uncertainties and insecurities (making you think you’re less educated than you are) and claims to have the answers.
Keep an eye out for these kinds of behaviors. If you notice this happening to you or someone you know and it makes you uneasy- trust your instincts. Leave, intercede, tell someone. Get out.
And if you see this man, stay far, far away.
