@rosebled continued from here
“It might,” the murmured in response, but made no move to let go just yet. For the most part, the younger twin was simply seeking comfort, but this was also their way of making note of the subtle (and at times not-so-subtle) changes taking place within Kanae. A slowly shifting weight distribution, a slowly increasing height, things like that. Things that, no doubt, would help to make their twin feel more comfortable with himself, more at home in his own skin. Very few things weren’t complex or fraught with them both, but this – thankfully – seemed to be less so than most other things. Their brother, after all, had always known he was himself, always known that he was male.
For the younger twin, however, things weren’t so straightforward. Most days, they felt somewhere between genders, though they tended to lean more toward masculine than feminine. On other days, however, they felt as if they didn’t align with any gender at all, a sense that was… somewhat pervasive no matter what, if they were being truly honest. Today, unsurprisingly, was one of those days, which didn’t help with the overall detached feeling they had been experiencing as of late. Despite not at all ready to relinquish contact – Karren felt the sensation of being touch-starved more keenly than their brother – the slightly shorter twin stepped back, breaking the embrace and allowing heir arms to come to rest at their sides.
A soft feeling of anxiety, a trembling that started in the tips of their fingers, spurred them into speaking. “A glass would be – nice.” They nearly choked on the words, feeling abrupt and sharp, altogether awkward and ungainly. As per usual, their own voice hit their ears as too high, too feminine, too wrong, and it probably showed. In an attempt to ground themself, lest they spiral into a complete anxiety attack, Karren bit down hard enough on their bottom lip that they could taste the copper tang of blood. Unsurprisingly, the trembling in the tips of their fingers traveled to the rest of their hands, the pain doing little to help.
So much for just seeking comfort.
Kanae's eyes followed Karren's movements as close as possible, silent and observing - he had to watch and observe. He was the oldest, the heir, and needed to be the support beam for everyone. Even the air around them felt tense, but why he couldn't figure out. Still he opted to listen, bringing another glass down before abandoning the blood wine for a brief second. It would need to air out anyway. His hands took his twin's in his own, nails scratching against skin. The scent of blood hit his nose, and while he wasn't sure what was wrong he still needed to comfort his sibling.
It didn't matter, his love for his twin still came first before the wine.
"Hold on a moment," he spoke. While hormone treatment no doubt lowered his voice to something more comfortable, something deeper - he pitched himself back up to match Karren. Even if for a few moments he didn't see the harm in matching them. They had been matching all their lives, he hoped it would make at least a little difference. Kanae smiled, and spoke in German -- "Take a deep breath. Do you wish to join me? We can watch a show, I'll grab some snacks and blankets."
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