Well--at least that was the general consensus between every single person Beatrix knew. Whomever came up with this first, had been tricking everyone to believe that a new year does indeed bring new possibilities, although the general was quite aware of the fact that this was not true. After all, a new year only meant that there were three hundred and sixty-five days to go before another year had passed. If you chose to ignore the calendar altogether, it would make absolutely no difference and those ‘new possibilities’ everyone is talking about, would not cease to exist—they would show up, just as usual, regardless of there being a new year.
Needless to say, Beatrix was not very fond of this shared thought nor New Year’s resolutions. It stopped too many people from following their dreams. Come September, a lot of people would want to achieve something, but with one look on the calendar they would change their mind and instead claim that they would save it for the new year.
This year was slightly different, however. For the first time in her life, Beatrix had a New Year’s resolution on her own. Leave the past in the past, and focus on the future.
One scarlet eye gazed blankly ahead. The other gazed at nothing, for it couldn’t gaze.
Beatrix was sitting at her very own wooden desk which she mainly used to write letters on. If she wasn’t cautious when she got up from the chair, she would collide her head into a shelf that had just been put up there. Clearly, she wasn’t yet used to the changes. Armor-clad hands held an old photograph with a gentle grip, fearing its destruction if she were to be too rough. Tilting her head ever so slightly, that aforementioned eye observed the photograph for what seemed like forever before its owner gave a slow nod of her head, as if to say goodbye.
A rather peculiar man was exposed in this photograph. He stood in front of a large mountain, wearing a black cloak and black shoes. His hood was pulled down, so his face was clearly visible—and what a face, too! With no blemishes at all, it was adorned with three tattoos in total. One stretching across his forehead, looking like a crown, and the other two laid their path down his face on either side, right beside the eyes. His eyes a sparkling silver, and his hair somewhere between maroon and ruby.
"Kardor," Beatrix murmured, allowing the name to slip past her lips and join the air of unspoken words that currently floated around her. He was the past. Her past. He was no longer her future. "I know nothing of you as it is. Your whereabouts are unknown to me. I’m not even sure if you’re alive. Still… you made me feel alive, if only for the short time we were together. A few months can hardly be called a long time. I know you’d agree with me if you were here." The photograph was then laid down in a medium-sized wooden box, along with two rings. Her engagement ring and her wedding ring.
"--two of the most beautiful rings I’ve ever owned. Quite a memory. To think I’ve been married, too! It’s sad to part with it, but alas…" She sighed. "I will not let the past overtake me. I should not keep these rings--I will not keep these rings, for he is no longer a part of my life."
Shaking her head somewhat, Beatrix set her eye on the minuscule heap of things that was lying next to the box. Everything was to be placed in the box--but first, she needed time to reminisce about past lovers, the ones that would no longer be a part of her life.
Next item was also a photograph. It seemed to be a tendency of hers, befriending strange-looking men. This man, however, could hardly be compared to the other as the only odd thing was his hair. Its color was nothing to talk about, as it was blonde (very common indeed), but its shape was not something anyone would volunteer to have on their head unless they were actively seeking attention. His hair was spiky--almost like a chocobo!
"…Oh, Cloud… Cloud Strife, you were one hell of a man."
Upon seeing this photograph, a quiet chuckle escaped her lips and she caught herself thinking of their story, everything they’d done together. They had a quite fulfilling story with many exciting events, but then also terribly sad ones to make up for the joy.
"I suppose we just sort of… fell apart, and now you’re gone and I can’t get you back. I wish we could go back to the way we were before, before any of this happened. Before I met Kardor, and before we got serious--I enjoyed our idle banter. I miss the man whom would always call me ‘milady’ in a jesting way and then proceed to steal my sword like it was nothing, like it wasn’t the Alexandrian general’s sword he stole. I always felt so safe with him. I felt like nothing bad could happen to me when he was around, even though I am the most feared swordswoman in the country. …Now that I think about it, perhaps that is reason enough for me to worry about bad things happening to me. Nevertheless, he swore to protect me, and he really did. Until we parted. I don’t think I’m ever going to see him again."
For some reason, Beatrix managed to avoid getting emotional. It was her final goodbye, her final chance to let out what had been on her mind for too long. There was enough emotions in her words, she really didn’t have to start crying on top of it.
Placing the photograph gently next to the other photograph, she picked up another ring from the pile of things that seemed to decrease tremendously every time she removed something. It was a beautiful silver ring, adorned with a small copper rose on the very top. She could recall it had been a Christmas present from two years ago. Truth be told, it had been her most treasured ring, even counting with her engagement ring and her wedding ring. Why, she could not tell anybody if they asked--she just knew that that ring was the one that was the most important to her.
She turned the ring over, looking at it from all sides possible before heaving another sigh, placing this ring on top of the photography of Cloud. It wasn’t meant to be. Well, she was fully aware of that from the moment they met. It would be a fling, although a rather long-lasting one, but nevertheless a fling. It was nice while it lasted, though.
"Let’s see… what’s next?" she muttered to herself while organizing the pile of things that was now not really a pile, but rather some few items left. The size of the next item made Beatrix understand why she’d thought of it as a stack, because as soon as it disappeared from the collection, it rapidly decreased in size and she could see that there weren’t many articles left at all.
A red scarf. That was the next article she would spend a few minutes thinking about, perhaps sniffing it too, before wrapping it neatly up to place it in the box. This belonged to Cloud, she remembered, but he had given it to her as a gift.
Beatrix continued that process with a steady hand, never faltering even one second if it meant the approach of tears. It meant nothing to cry over the past, she had told herself over and over, no use wasting tears on the ones not deserving of it.
Somewhere in the middle of it, a tall man crept up behind her and placed his abnormally large hand on her shoulder while asking in a tired tone if she wouldn’t quit for the night and come to bed soon. Beatrix shook her head in response and turned to face him, one scarlet eye settling on the Guado’s face high above her own (no wonder, considering her sitting position next to his standing one).
"I’m sorry, Seymour. You’ll have to wait for me a bit longer, it seems. Why don’t you huddle under the covers and start warming the bed up, and I’ll come join you in a little while, I promise. I need to finish this before I can fully devote myself to the present," she said, lips curling up to form a small and drowsy, yet warm smile directed towards the man. Her words gained her a thoughtful nod in response, and so he removed his hand from her shoulder and left the room, leaving her in the silence she needed to complete her task.
Minutes passed. It was uncomplicated for her to finish up what she had been doing for the past hour or so without further disturbance, but she knew that Seymour was waiting for her, so she decided to make the rest swift as it was things that weren’t nearly as important to her as the other things were. Placing the final item in the box, she took her time when it came to closing the lid, her eye looking over everything to make sure that everything she wanted to be in there, was in there. When it seemed like everything was in order, she closed the lid quietly and stood up from the chair, bumping her head in the process. A small ouch slipped past her lips as one slender hand elevated to rub the spot on her head she’d hit, eyebrows tightening somewhat to create a frown. "I really have to get used to this damned shelf. If I keep it up like this, I’ll hit a hole in my head in no time flat," she huffed.
After getting over the almost non-existent pain (really, it wasn’t that painful), Beatrix picked the box up, eyeing it carefully before she placed it on the aforementioned (evil) shelf. She pushed the chair out of her way and took a step back, standing with arms akimbo while observing it. It would look well there--but no matter how much she tried to convince herself that less is more, she felt like something was missing on that shelf. It was completely empty, after all, with the exception of the box. Pursing her lips somewhat, she bent down to open one of the desk’s drawers, revealing another photograph--however, this photograph was framed.
Her smile grew slightly as she picked up the framed photograph and adjusted its leg, placing it on top of the box. The other pictures had been silly in-the-moment-pictures, taken without any further notice, but this one was very fancy. Prim and proper, it showed a tall man with blue, pointy hair standing straight, his abnormally large hands connected in a finger tent while his unimpressed facial expression said it all--but the ghost of a sinister smile betrayed his entire being.
"This is my future," Beatrix said out loud.
"Hopefully, your nearest future will involve this bed, me, you and sleep," a manly voice chimed from the room adjacent to the one she currently stayed in.
"Yes, yes! I’m coming! Don’t be such a sourpuss," she answered, stifling a faint laugh.
"I’ll be a sourpuss if I want to be a sourpuss. But this sourpuss—what kind of word is that, really?—needs both his woman and his sleep, preferably at the same time."
"Multitasking, hm? As much as I enjoy both activities, I don’t think it would be a good idea to have both at the same time, don’t you think?"
"…That is not what I meant—"
"I know, dear. I’m coming now."
Das rude balflear Well, one cannot complain. It has been a while since I last sat foot here, however… has anything remarkable happened in my absence, I wonder?
Cloud shook his head, letting blond locks waver over his eyes. He sighed and straightened up, and listened to her words. It was true, that was silly, but that’s how Cloud was. He did up and leave many times before, and he was unsure if she wanted to see him again. But…
“Yeah… just one of the few reasons…” A gloved hand reached up to her face, cupping her cheek softly before his thumb ran over her eyepatch, lifting it from her face. If he recalled, he was one of the few, if not the only one, that could ever do that. “I just… missed you, Bea. A lot.”
Multicolored oculi observed the blonde with a wary gaze, though her scarlet eye was the most responsive of those two as her cerulean eye was somewhat glassy, perhaps because it hadn't been used for so long.
"I cannot deny that I missed you too, Cloud. More than you know, or possibly think." Finally, she allowed a warm smile to meander its way upon her mien to support her words.
((Yes it would! I’m sure another two years is possible. Sure we may be busy and not be on here all time, and sometimes we have other muses, but we will return and make new memories while laughing over the old ones. xD I know it will.
WE SHOULD. Oh my god I still remember a lot of our in-jokes and quotes we’ve made, and I know I made sure to save a few pictures and quotes from the first years. :l Good times, hilarious stuff. ))
ooc. As long as I manage to keep this account up and running, i.e. not deleted, I think that will be possible :B (naw this account will never be deleted even if I lose my muse for Bea again, I can't afford that) Wow, I'm already looking forward to that :l
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