🌷

crazy zerose

[rosinbae]

isa he/they 17 zb1 acc male writer

masterlist

[rosinbae]

flight 22 ⋆ kim taerae

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ the last thing he wants to do is be a bother, but it's taerae, so it doesn't matter.

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ fluffy fluff.

whilst taerae snores beside him, y/n sits up, eyes wide as he waits.

he normally never has trouble sleeping, especially with taerae beside him, caged in his arms with his head tucked under his chin and hair tickling his face. there's usually never an issue with sleep, and that's why tonight, he feels extra anxious as he sits up awake.

theres a thunderstorm happening outside, and y/n isn't the biggest fan of those. earlier, before he went to sleep, he sat down at the kitchen counter drinking milk tea, worried out of his mind about getting stricken by lightning even as he's inside.

taerae reassured him that it was no big deal, that he'd be there the entire time so there was nothing to worry about. the constant rain hitting the window pane should have been the least of his worries, because at least he had a cuddle buddy at night.

for the first few hours, everything was okay, since taerae had no problem drifting off to sleep almost immediately. sleeping has never been an issue for him, he has always out like a light the moment his head hits the pillow.

he sits up for.. he doesn't even know how long, just sitting there as he listens to taerae's snoring, the sound of the rain, the thunderous clouds, and the lightning which continues threatening to strike.

the anxiousness coursing through his veins is insane, and he takes continuous deep breaths to try and calm himself down.

they don't work.

he looks over at taerae, whose sleeping soundly with his back turned towards him. he's simply unbothered by everything, and y/n sighs as he watches him sleep.

"taerae" he whispers, scooting closer. the boy gives a small mumble, but doesn't fully respond at all. y/n sighs and scoots closer, poking his back.

"taerae" he whines, his voice raising a little higher as he sees taerae shuffle. "babe".

"what? hm? yeah?" taerae mutters under his breath, he turns over and rubs his eyes, blinking away any tiredness from them. "what's up?"

"um— well.. it's—"

y/n is cut off by the sound of thunder crashing, making him squeal, frightened. instantly, he grabs the duvet under him, taking in a sheepish breath. "well, yeah— that".

taerae feels around on the bedside table and grabs his glasses, putting them on he he stares at y/n, whose terrified at the sound of thunder and lightning outside. "love, are you afraid?"

"i.. fuck, i can't sleep" y/n mumbles, he closes his eyes and rubs his temples. "the storm, it's making it difficult for me to sleep, i can't find anything to distract me".

taerae stares at his partner for a moment, before smiling to himself as he gets an idea. "hey, you know everything's gonna be alright? right?"

y/n clears his throat, shivering as he suddenly feels cold. taerae pulls the duvet over him and scoots closer, running his fingers through his hair. "can you.."

"can i?"

"can you sing for me?"

taerae raises an eyebrow, and y/n wraps the blanket around him. he doesn't question the statement, because if it's gonna help y/n fall asleep, then he'll do anything to make sure that happens. "alright love, what do you want me to sing?"

"anything is fine" y/n mutters, rolling over to wrap his arms around taerae, pulling him closer. "the only thing that's gonna put to sleep is your voice".

taerae rests his head on top of y/n's, and he rests his hand on his back, beginning to run it up and down. he presses a kiss to y/n's forehead, and the boy shivers again at the feeling of cold air brushing through the room.

"it's all gonna be alright, babe" taerae whispers, his voice seemingly overpowering the sound of rain hitting the window. "you'll be fine".

"taerae.."

"yes?"

"i said sing".

taerae chuckled at the words from his boyfriend, said boyfriend who is currently hugging him like he doesn't want to let go at all. "your so demanding you know that right?"

"sing please" y/n mumbles, pouting but burying his face into taerae's shirt. "i wanna sleep".

"i got you babe".

turns out all wasn't lost, and y/n did end up going to sleep that night.

thank god taerae's singing was there to coax him.

[purikkura]

collision report — s.hanbin

❪ ★彡 SYNOPSIS. ❫ ──── you've witnessed your best friend cause one too many train accidents, but never did you ever expect your heart would be caught in one.

❪ ★彡 PAIRING. ❫ ──── sung hanbin x gn!reader

❪ ★彡 WORD COUNT. ❫ ──── 2019 words

❪ ★彡 GENRE/TROPES. ❫ ──── angst... really bad angst, high school au (was tempted to set it at university, but didn't know how fitting that was </3), best friends

❪ ★彡 WARNINGS. ❫ ──── allusions to & mentions of death; reader's hella paranoid and delulu; hanbin's lowkey a red flag, but we choose to look past that

❪ ★彡 NOTES. ❫ ──── first fic... y'all, this took ages. i'm 98% sure there's no way i'll be able to pump out requests at a fast rate as most, but i'll try to get to that point. eventually. this was loosely inspired by doushite mo kimi ga suki da by akb48, hence why i brought up trains so often. get my sisters to 1 million on spotify, they're so close!! alternatively titled as 'heartbreak prince!'

You told him you’d be gone for no more than 5 minutes.

And usually, when you tell Hanbin things, such promises become your top priority—for no reason in particular other than that he was Sung Hanbin. Everyone liked Sung Hanbin, whether they’d admit to it or not.

Perhaps you stood ahead in line than others—reap the benefits of the title as his best friend, why not—but that position was distressing as it was rewarding considering all the train wrecks you had to witness practically firsthand. Cringing upon the first whiff of smoke in the form of heartbreak, you could only feel bad for that week’s victim who had fallen ill to Hanbin’s charms, who shoveled their nerves and confessed to him, sooted hands waiting to be taken by a pair as pure as his.

He never did. He never could; that, you knew very well based on the horrified looks he snuck over to you during the first few incidents. He’s gotten better at it, though—derailing the other person’s high-speed emotions, making it not as messy of a bloody blue ruin. As per every rejection, it ended with you two turning your backs and heading homebound together. Envy wasn’t always a green-eyed monster. It could also take on the form of a devastated high school student, eyes discerning the back of your head (rather than the obvious space between you and your friend) as though you had kicked dirt on them just then. Don’t you know better? The body’s still warm.

Homebound is where you should be right about now, but much to the shock of everyone else, you had a life outside of playing the role of “the one that always stands next to Hanbin; are they his significant other?” and, besides, you were people-pleasing elsewhere. Needing some last-minute material for an upcoming test, your teacher obliged the offer, but that meant taking time out of your day to actually confront them. You thought it would take no more than 5 minutes.

You told Hanbin that at approximately 4:37 PM.

It’s 5:23.

Perhaps on the way, you could sum up a valid excuse as to why you stayed way later than expected. Hanbin knew you were lagging behind in the class; he was the one helping you all this time, and it was more than likely that he was the one who tipped your teacher intel that you needed extra studying material in the first place. He tends to do that often. Care too much. Then again, you always tried to return the favor in other classes, no matter how bad you were, or, at the very least, attempted to buy or share your lunch. You physically had to fight to put a chip in his mouth once, which might or might not have resulted in choking, you profusely apologizing, and him simply smiling as if he didn’t almost befriend death.

It was the small things that made you love him.

Made people love him—you liked him a very normal amount.

. . .

Who are we fooling?

You were absolutely, tremendously, without a doubt, down terribly in the trenches in love with him! And it seemed everyone was well-aware, including your math teacher who not-so-subtly dropped the question only a few minutes ago, “Are you two an item yet?” Only problem was, you couldn’t tell the one person your feelings mattered most to. No, really, how could you? After every crush people have caught? After every crash he caused?

You weren’t willing to ruin what the two of you currently had. A relationship that exceeded mere acquaintances—one you always hesitated asking if it ever meant more to him. You even hesitated to ask someone else if they drew some sort of boundary with their friends when it came to physicality. It wasn’t uncommon for you and Hanbin to randomly entangle together, arms haphazardly overlapping with the other’s, however unintentional it may be. It was comfortable for the two of you, though perhaps not so much for passersby that looked at you with rage. A stark contrast between the way Hanbin looked at you with an unbelievable amount of tenderness.

. . . Regardless.

Hanbin was your best friend. 

You couldn’t leave him, and he wouldn’t leave you.

That’s what you thought before making it to the courtyard. No Hanbin in sight.

Huh. That was strange.

The thought of him leaving you…

Your shoes kicked into high gear while the sun trickled to disappear. As if a ghost of one of Hanbin’s victims possessed you, a surge of unbeknownst confidence compelled you to try. Because you were tired of standing at a railroad crossing. Because you were fascinated by train wrecks.

There was no doubt in your mind. You love Sung Hanbin.

Didn’t matter how other people felt or how anyone would look at you. You were practically first on the waiting list anyway; you should feel more than willing to announce your feelings to the world and let the wind carry your words over to him.

Thankfully, Hanbin takes extremely slow strolls, so you managed to catch up to him right when he crossed the railroad crossing. (That’s also strange. You guys rarely take this shortcut.) Unfortunately, you arrived right when the gates fell.

“Hanbin!”

All you could see was him. Him. Him. Him alone. You could already imagine how beautiful he’ll look when he turns around, unable to hear laughter blocked out by what sounded like a siren.

You called his name another time. Possibly another.

Though the last was cut off by the incoming train, bells ringing, severing the red thread that connected you two until parted by death.

You braced for impact, a grimace replacing your previous dazed expression, but all you really felt was the wind pushing you back. You think the universe saved you just now.

Then the ringing stopped. You opened your eyes, expecting him to initially chastise you for being so reckless before teasing you for saying his name like a lovesick fool. But all he did was stare at you. Sure, there resided some specs of endearment in his eyes—that would never change—but the rest of his features reminded you so much of the horror-struck looks he gave you upon every confession. All he did was stare at you.

Meanwhile, all you could do was stare at her.

You’ve seen her before. She’s pretty—long sleek hair adorned by a headband, an accessory Hanbin doted on in the past for a reason beyond your one-sided awareness.

However, it wasn’t the headband that drew your attention or made your eyes bulge out of their sockets. It was the space between them, or lack thereof when you noticed their hands glued together.

You must’ve stared long enough not to notice the gates rose, clashing with your confidence that diminished instantly right to the soles of your shoes.

You only picked your head up when he called your name, as gently as he could.

“Hi.”

“Hi,” he mirrored in the same nervousness.

Glancing between them was a difficult task not to do. “Sorry it took so long, I… had to get some help from my teacher.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” he made sure to say that first, sneaking a look to the side. It was still his part, and you knew this script far better than anyone else. “I’m sorry — I forgot to introduce you.”

You didn’t catch her name. That was, without a doubt, the least interesting part of his sentence. Still, the words ‘My girlfriend’ resounded perfectly in your ears.

“Oh.” Congrats, you incorporated your first-ever adlib in your role, but please, follow the script. “Since—since when?”

“Since now, I think,” the girl finally took charge of the lines, attentive to neither yours nor Hanbin’s broken expressions, but she (at the very least) picked up on the awkward situation unfolding. “I guess I asked Hanbin out a few weeks ago? And he said yes, but we didn’t go anywhere from there until today when I… asked him to walk me home.”

“A few weeks ago?” Your breath fell short despite saying only four words. 

Hanbin didn’t necessarily have the gall, but to better his conscious, he had to deliver an answer. “It happened in the middle of a convenience store.” Translation: he didn’t think that much of it.

“And you said yes?” Your voice was quiet. For the first time, Hanbin forgot what to say. For the first time, he forgot how to redirect the train. There was only one rail, and it was headed straight for the two of you.

Out of every confession leading up to now, this was by far the worst.

“Yes.”

At some point in time, he lost his girlfriend’s hand, but she delicately laced it back with his as pure reassurance, prompting him to add: “Yeah, I mean, I’ve been crushing on her all year. I figured, why not?”

He’s been crushing on her all year? He’s never mentioned that before, has he? If so, how could you not have possibly known?

“Why not…” Your body’s breaking down, losing function. “Why didn’t…” …you tell your best friend? Why didn’t you tell me you were on the cusp of killing your own best friend? “Why don’t you walk her home this week?”

That definitely wasn’t the response Hanbin was expecting, or wanted. But the director is intrigued, seeking confirmation as to whether their actors know their characters as much as they did, persisting in the change in script.

“What?” Anyone could’ve heard how his voice dejected an octave lower.

“Yeah… yeah, you know,” you trailed in, unsure as to whether you really meant what you were about to say, “I’m staying after to study for the test soon. I wouldn’t want you to walk home alone. Either of you.”

Hanbin convinced himself those last few words were rushed because the ones before were definitely a direct hit on him, and there’s not a second in this situation when he doesn’t regret saying yes to his girlfriend’s homeward request.

“You sure? I wouldn’t want to impose—”

“Are you serious?” He didn’t mean to interrupt his girlfriend as he did, and he especially didn’t want to sound as exasperated as he did. Nothing could stop your eyes from flashing a bit of concern; it was built into your system that Hanbin’s well-being was priority #1. “If you still need help, I could come over.”

Was he upset with you? Anger is common as far as human nature goes, but the genuine kind never rose between you and him. You’ve certainly seen him tense up in situations like confessions or tests even he didn't study for (no thanks to you), but did his shoulders always buckle so tight?

“I think you’ve helped enough.”

There, you’ve done it. Now, there lies two casualties. That red thread of fate did last until the very end.

“B-But I’m here now!” You sounded more enthused than you were. “And I don’t want to hold either of you up, so let’s start walking, yeah?”

You extended your arm, gesturing for them to lead the way. Part of you hoped he’d take your tainted hand instead, but he never did. He never could. His girlfriend had to tug for his body to finally react, and you witnessed his face surf through a plethora of emotions before settling on a forced cordial smile—one he used after every killing.

This moment felt all too familiar. Déjà vu all over again, only you felt out of place. This was a change in scenery. Rather than spotting the sunset, you watched as the couple turned their backs, your eyes boring into the back of an innocent’s head, who walked in the position you once had.

You were prepared to play the kicked puppy, a gate of tears ready for their cue. But you couldn’t, not when the boy who did away with your innocence walks already guilted with so many bodies, some that hadn’t even gone cold.

So, you never did.

You told him you needed all but 5 minutes. If it had been 5 minutes, would your life have been spared?

[rosinbae]

IM DYING WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO THEM 💔💔💔

[rosinbae]

always ⋆ kim taerae

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ where kim taerae encounters a certain flirtatious enhypen member at kcon.

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x enha member male!reader

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ fluff.

there were many interactions during kcon that breezed past taerae's mind.

his mind was mainly focused on other things, like the stage, debuting, stuff like that. the realization that he debuted took long to dawn on him until he actually began interacting with the other idols.

one of those idols being a certain member of enhypen.

l/n y/n, jesus christ he's gonna make taerae lose his mind.

taerae has heard of enhypen, obviously, they're one of the most popular boy groups of the current generation, but y/n in particular, he's a whole different story.

he's hears stories of y/n, him being the member who flusters everyone without even trying. how he had so much of the 4th gen wrapped around his fingers, specifically members of many boy groups.

"oh, l/n y/n? that man will flirt with anything that moves, it's normal for him".

taerae hears whispers, he hears rumors, he's read articles pertaining to dating rumors surrounding the boy. most of the articles are all in good fun, though, because y/n doesn't seem to actually care about love.

he doesn't think much about it.

until he meets the boy himself.

taerae had just finished up a conversation with a member of tempest, identically named kim taerae, how funny huh? he bid goodbye to him and turned the other way to find his group again.

come on, it's a group of nine! it's not like they can get that far anyway—

"lost?"

"ah!" taerae jumps, startled by the sudden voice. he turns to his right and dear god, there stands l/n y/n, smiling at him. "jesus, you scared me".

"my apologies" y/n smiles lightly, looking taerae up and down, which confuses him. "are you lost?"

"not really" taerae mutters, playing with his fingers. "i'm just looking for the rest of my group".

y/n looks down at his shirt, a look of recognization coming to his face. "zerobaseone? oh! your kim taerae!"

taerae looks shocked, surprised, dumbfounded. "i'm sorry? you know me?" he feels stupid asking that question, because of course he did, y/n was a social butterfly, he probably knew everyone here without even talking to them.

"my members and i watched many of your boys planet performances" taerae feels his breath hitch at those words, they make him feel so.. special? for an unknown reason he couldn't fathom, those words had an unexplained affect on him.

"oh— uh.. you did?" he quickly asks, feeling his face unexpectedly heat up. y/n chuckles, closing his eyes as he smiles. he nods, staring at taerae like he just found the love of his life.

"i wasn't even gonna watch the show" y/n begins, another chuckle leaving his lips. "but then jake showed me your back door performance so then i started watching and maybe i voted for you—"

"you? you voted for me? that's.. shocking, i'm flattered!"

taerae didn't think he would ever say this to someone in his life, but his heart sort of warms at the thought that another idol voted for him.

especially someone as.. known as y/n.

y/n narrows his eyes at taerae, smiling to himself as a certain thought comes to his mind.

"your much prettier in person".

taerae goes still at the comment, his face goes even redder at the words. this is literally just y/n, taerae, he flirts with everyone, he's just being nice.

"i— well, thank you" taerae continues playing with his fingers. "do you say that to everyone?"

"huh?"

"you call every boy you meet during promotions pretty?" taerae is brave enough to ask, with y/n's reputation, he could just be saying that for fun, to fluster taerae.

"nope, just the really pretty ones" y/n emphasizes the word pretty by directly making eye contact with taerae, a sly smirk coming to his face as he notices the tint of pink hue that spreads on taerae's cheeks.

"i guess i'm special then".

"i thought you already knew that?" the enhypen member inquires, whistling the tune to say my name as he awaits taerae's response.

taerae gives a soft chuckle, mind immediately drifting back to the fact that he had to find his group. "oh god i have to find my group!"

"oh? did i distract you?"

"well yeah but not in a rude way or anything—"

y/n chuckles once again, enjoying the way he continues to fluster the younger. "just kidding, i have to find my group too, lets walk together".

"together?"

"what? i wanna walk with a pretty boy, i'm taking a chance" y/n comments seamlessly, he reaches over to link their arms, making taerae freeze for a moment before he looks down at the floor.

"lead the way then, genius".

taerae links his arms back with y/n, the two of them now walking around the stage together. he never knew really, but y/n was pretty funny, and he found himself laughing from time to time at a joke he said.

taerae learned a lot of new things about y/n he otherwise wouldn't have known if he hadn't met him at the stage of kcon. he learned that y/n is a vegetarian, has two dogs, used to do archery in high school, and had actually only watched boys planet to vote for him.

it's funny, really. two months ago kim taerae would have never expected that he'd be walking around, linking arms with, giggling with the guy who has had dating rumors with half the boy groups of the fourth generation, because that just seems so unreal even if it is happening right now.

y/n is much of a social butterfly, he's waved and said hello to at least seven people from different groups already as they walk around the stage, looking for their groups.

"what do you mean you liked en garde better than switch?"

"don't fault me, kim taerae" y/n replies quickly. he gives taerae a look of amusement, and the kim simply gives a playfully eye roll, looking the other way. "it's just preference" he shrugs.

"you did look very cute during the stage, though".

"is this all you do?" taerae questions, which is ironic considering he's linking arms with this guy. "compliment me?"

"do you not want me to?" y/n counters, shaking his head a tiny bit, which makes taerae frown. "i'm being honest".

"maybe too honest".

"accept my compliments, taerae, i feel bad knowing you don't".

taerae looks down once again, not wanting to make eye contact with y/n, fearing he'd probably melt if he did so. "how long have we been walking for?"

"i think my group abandoned me, they're tired of me" y/n sighs dramatically, placing a hand on his chest.

"i would be too.."

"excuse me?"

"hm?"

taerae makes no effort to hide his laughter, immediately bursting into giggles as he couldn't hold it in. "i'm sorry, i couldn't help it" he says behind his hand, which he used to cover his mouth.

"your making fun of me after how much i have complimented you?"

"we've known each other for like— forty five minutes".

"they were very important forty five minutes to me".

the enhypen member shakes his head, gosh, he was such an actor wasn't he? taerae had no idea what he was supposed to say next, because he was getting confused about where his group could have possibly been—

"oh y/n! there you are!"

a raven haired boy walks y/n's way, deadpanning when he saw him linking arms with taerae. "again, y/n? what did i tell you about flirting with every new rookie—"

"hey! i'm not doing anything wrong!" y/n counters. he points at taerae, who suddenly gets nervous. "he likes me! right taerae?"

taerae chuckles, simply shrugging. "it could go either way".

"is that how you speak about your senior? i'm appalled".

y/n finally lets go of taerae, placing his hands on his hips. taerae laughs, looking to his senior and quickly bowing. "wow, i can't believe this, after i accompanied you all this time?"

"i mean— i did appreciate your company".

"of course you did".

"should i leave you two?" y/n looks back to his member, blinking. "i'll be right there, jay".

"okay then" he gives y/n a weird look before walking back over to the rest of his group.

y/n watches him walk away, and he turns back to taerae, who immediately shrinks under his gaze. he blinks for a moment before taking out a pen. "let me give you my number".

"your— your what?"

taerae thinks he's hearing things, but y/n just smiles at him, so casual about everything. "i'm giving you my number, because i like you".

taerae wonders if he does this with every other boy he's flirted with.

"but if you don't want it—"

"just" taerae sighs, slumping his shoulders. "just give it to me".

taerae watches as y/n writes down his number on his wrist, he is so much prettier up close..he wonders in his head. "call me, kim taerae~".

"i don't plan on doing so".

what a lie that was.

[rosinbae]

cardigan ⋆ kim taerae

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ even after he left, kim taerae could never really forget his first love, nor could he forget his first heartbreak.

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ angst, fluff kinda.

whenever taerae walks into his room, he's always met with a memory.

there, hanging before his closet, is a sewn purple cardigan, prettily perched up on the hanger, as if waiting for him every time he would walk into his room. he always felt his breath get caught in his throat whenever he directly looked at it, because he would always remember him.

now it may seem stupid to think that some stupid purple cardigan makes taerae freeze in his tracks whenever he so much as he stepped into his room, why doesn't he just move it?

because he doesn't want to forget him at all.

it's been almost two years since he left, the only thing he left as a gift to taerae was the one single cardigan he'd sewn for him after getting a creative spark.

seo y/n was certainly a character. taerae can name so many words that describe him, brave, energetic, dramatic, sweet, creative, talented.

but the most important thing was, he was kim taerae's. for three almost four years, kim taerae had seo y/n in the palm of his hand, the two of them were unable to be separated.

taerae would spend so much time with him, most of the time just admiring him, but they'd do pretty much everything together. he can't remember how many times he accidentally left his guitar at y/n's house because of how many times he sat down and played for him.

he always remembers y/n watching with interested eyes, his main focus being taerae and taerae only. for the longest time, they seemed unstoppable, like separating them would just bring them closer each time.

in all of his years of living, taerae has never encountered something so painful yet beautiful, something which caused him so much pain yet so much happiness as well.

if he could go back, he'd want it to happen all over again, those joyous moments he used to see with his own two eyes now just memories of his past, something he's supposed to smile at when he looks back, but instead he frowns every time y/n and that stupid stupid cardigan come back in his mind to remind him of such things.

y/n, the same y/n who he could hug, hold hands with, talk to, kiss every day, is now nothing but a figment of his past, because he's not coming back, even with how much taerae wants him to.

so now, seeing that cardigan, that purple cardigan, the same one y/n had sewn and left for him right before he left, is the only thing that can remind taerae of him, the one constant reminder that he was taerae's first love.

but he was also taerae's first heartbreak.

taerae remembers, y/n was a designer.

he used to spend all of his time, day and night, sewing. he remembers the specifics, how y/n would constantly sit at his desk in front of the sewing machine, countless fabrics of different colors scattered around his room as he sewed whatever came to his mind.

y/n was truly a person of unique talent, he could create whatever came to his mind with just the right amount of time and focus.

in all honesty, taerae admired with work.

well— taerae admired everything about him, it's kind of difficult to not admire your partner when they're someone as hardworking as y/n.

taerae never really considered how y/n also admired him back..

whenever he thinks back to y/n, the kind of person he is, he remembers seeing him as this sort of light.

taerae had been going through the most horrible depression you could imagine, and when y/n came into his life, everything became better, became more bearable.

he swears that he could sit down and watch y/n sew for hours, just talking with him made taerae's day better, even if his day wasn't necessarily bad.

it seemed that after y/n came into his life, it all got better.

he was like the solution taerae needed after all that had come crashing down.

"why are you taking my measurements?" taerae asked once, he never really got the excitement y/n felt whenever he would sew, but he would always be supportive.

"because.." y/n mutters as he wraps the measuring tape around taerae's waist, narrowing his eyes so he can see the specific number. "i don't want to sew the whole entire thing and then have it be too big or small".

"stay there" y/n commands, taking his pen and quickly writing down the measurements. "give me a color".

"what?"

"just give me a color" y/n is now searching through different fabric colors, looking to taerae for an answer. "taerae!"

"okay um.. uh— purple".

"purple it is".

y/n clicks his tongue, looking to his boyfriend for a moment before looking back to his very messy desk. "alright get out".

"get out?" taerae asks, a small frown coming to his face.

"yes get out! you can't have spoilers!"

that's only really a fraction of how they were, y/n was definitely the outspoken type, he said what came to mind with no prior thinking beforehand, taerae found that hilarious as much as he found it crazy.

y/n was crazy confident, taerae doesn't get how people found it overbearing, he took pride in his work, that's literally a good thing.

but if there's one thing about y/n that taerae could never get, something about his personality that he understands makes him seem severely unlikable.

he kept secrets.

secrets that taerae wished he knew about, secrets that taerae couldn't even begin to imagine, let alone think that his partner would keep.

the two of them were okay, they were, taerae could not actually believe he'd been with a person in a relationship for almost four years, and y/n, well.. he was himself.

taerae didn't think they had any problems, he thought everything was okay. y/n shouldn't have felt like he had to hide something, taerae was an understanding person, he wouldn't judge him.

taerae felt as if his world was crashing down on him, the constant worry that he'd done something wrong and that y/n was hiding that fact from him because he was mad.

he felt a random shot of his insecurity that he'd never felt before.

it didn't help that he felt like he couldn't tell y/n either due to how much of an idiot he felt like.

"it looks nice on you" y/n says as he helps taerae put on the purple cardigan he'd sewn for him, he stares for a moment before smiling, staring at taerae with enamored eyes.

"purple suits you" y/n comments, and though taerae's heart warms at the compliment, his mind wanders to thoughts that make him feel horrible. "i knew it'd be pretty".

taerae gives a small smile, and y/n presses a small kiss to his cheek.

they were good, they were good, everything was okay, taerae didn't know where all this worry suddenly came from, he didn't feel good enough, y/n deserved better, he didn't deserve someone like him, someone that would drag him down.

said thoughts began keeping him up at night, thoughts about how he was probably the worst boyfriend in the world, how y/n was successful and he wasn't, all of that was what made them crumble.

even as y/n slept on his shoulders, even as y/n combed his fingers through his hair, even when y/n showered him with compliments, taerae still felt as if he'd done absolutely nothing to be a good lover.

there was something wrong with him.

it was all his fault that they crumbled, that y/n left, it was him who started that fight, it was him who felt like he wasn't adding enough, y/n didn't do anything wrong, none of them did anything wrong.

now he's gone, all because of taerae, all because he couldn't just shut up, all because of his stupid insecurities that he couldn't keep to himself. he hates himself, he hates that he couldn't just shut up.

now, all he has is a memory.

that stupid purple cardigan.

[rosinbae]

i actually hate this so much

[rosinbae]

cardigan ⋆ kim taerae

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ even after he left, kim taerae could never really forget his first love, nor could he forget his first heartbreak.

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ angst, fluff kinda.

whenever taerae walks into his room, he's always met with a memory.

there, hanging before his closet, is a sewn purple cardigan, prettily perched up on the hanger, as if waiting for him every time he would walk into his room. he always felt his breath get caught in his throat whenever he directly looked at it, because he would always remember him.

now it may seem stupid to think that some stupid purple cardigan makes taerae freeze in his tracks whenever he so much as he stepped into his room, why doesn't he just move it?

because he doesn't want to forget him at all.

it's been almost two years since he left, the only thing he left as a gift to taerae was the one single cardigan he'd sewn for him after getting a creative spark.

seo y/n was certainly a character. taerae can name so many words that describe him, brave, energetic, dramatic, sweet, creative, talented.

but the most important thing was, he was kim taerae's. for three almost four years, kim taerae had seo y/n in the palm of his hand, the two of them were unable to be separated.

taerae would spend so much time with him, most of the time just admiring him, but they'd do pretty much everything together. he can't remember how many times he accidentally left his guitar at y/n's house because of how many times he sat down and played for him.

he always remembers y/n watching with interested eyes, his main focus being taerae and taerae only. for the longest time, they seemed unstoppable, like separating them would just bring them closer each time.

in all of his years of living, taerae has never encountered something so painful yet beautiful, something which caused him so much pain yet so much happiness as well.

if he could go back, he'd want it to happen all over again, those joyous moments he used to see with his own two eyes now just memories of his past, something he's supposed to smile at when he looks back, but instead he frowns every time y/n and that stupid stupid cardigan come back in his mind to remind him of such things.

y/n, the same y/n who he could hug, hold hands with, talk to, kiss every day, is now nothing but a figment of his past, because he's not coming back, even with how much taerae wants him to.

so now, seeing that cardigan, that purple cardigan, the same one y/n had sewn and left for him right before he left, is the only thing that can remind taerae of him, the one constant reminder that he was taerae's first love.

but he was also taerae's first heartbreak.

taerae remembers, y/n was a designer.

he used to spend all of his time, day and night, sewing. he remembers the specifics, how y/n would constantly sit at his desk in front of the sewing machine, countless fabrics of different colors scattered around his room as he sewed whatever came to his mind.

y/n was truly a person of unique talent, he could create whatever came to his mind with just the right amount of time and focus.

in all honesty, taerae admired with work.

well— taerae admired everything about him, it's kind of difficult to not admire your partner when they're someone as hardworking as y/n.

taerae never really considered how y/n also admired him back..

whenever he thinks back to y/n, the kind of person he is, he remembers seeing him as this sort of light.

taerae had been going through the most horrible depression you could imagine, and when y/n came into his life, everything became better, became more bearable.

he swears that he could sit down and watch y/n sew for hours, just talking with him made taerae's day better, even if his day wasn't necessarily bad.

it seemed that after y/n came into his life, it all got better.

he was like the solution taerae needed after all that had come crashing down.

"why are you taking my measurements?" taerae asked once, he never really got the excitement y/n felt whenever he would sew, but he would always be supportive.

"because.." y/n mutters as he wraps the measuring tape around taerae's waist, narrowing his eyes so he can see the specific number. "i don't want to sew the whole entire thing and then have it be too big or small".

"stay there" y/n commands, taking his pen and quickly writing down the measurements. "give me a color".

"what?"

"just give me a color" y/n is now searching through different fabric colors, looking to taerae for an answer. "taerae!"

"okay um.. uh— purple".

"purple it is".

y/n clicks his tongue, looking to his boyfriend for a moment before looking back to his very messy desk. "alright get out".

"get out?" taerae asks, a small frown coming to his face.

"yes get out! you can't have spoilers!"

that's only really a fraction of how they were, y/n was definitely the outspoken type, he said what came to mind with no prior thinking beforehand, taerae found that hilarious as much as he found it crazy.

y/n was crazy confident, taerae doesn't get how people found it overbearing, he took pride in his work, that's literally a good thing.

but if there's one thing about y/n that taerae could never get, something about his personality that he understands makes him seem severely unlikable.

he kept secrets.

secrets that taerae wished he knew about, secrets that taerae couldn't even begin to imagine, let alone think that his partner would keep.

the two of them were okay, they were, taerae could not actually believe he'd been with a person in a relationship for almost four years, and y/n, well.. he was himself.

taerae didn't think they had any problems, he thought everything was okay. y/n shouldn't have felt like he had to hide something, taerae was an understanding person, he wouldn't judge him.

taerae felt as if his world was crashing down on him, the constant worry that he'd done something wrong and that y/n was hiding that fact from him because he was mad.

he felt a random shot of his insecurity that he'd never felt before.

it didn't help that he felt like he couldn't tell y/n either due to how much of an idiot he felt like.

"it looks nice on you" y/n says as he helps taerae put on the purple cardigan he'd sewn for him, he stares for a moment before smiling, staring at taerae with enamored eyes.

"purple suits you" y/n comments, and though taerae's heart warms at the compliment, his mind wanders to thoughts that make him feel horrible. "i knew it'd be pretty".

taerae gives a small smile, and y/n presses a small kiss to his cheek.

they were good, they were good, everything was okay, taerae didn't know where all this worry suddenly came from, he didn't feel good enough, y/n deserved better, he didn't deserve someone like him, someone that would drag him down.

said thoughts began keeping him up at night, thoughts about how he was probably the worst boyfriend in the world, how y/n was successful and he wasn't, all of that was what made them crumble.

even as y/n slept on his shoulders, even as y/n combed his fingers through his hair, even when y/n showered him with compliments, taerae still felt as if he'd done absolutely nothing to be a good lover.

there was something wrong with him.

it was all his fault that they crumbled, that y/n left, it was him who started that fight, it was him who felt like he wasn't adding enough, y/n didn't do anything wrong, none of them did anything wrong.

now he's gone, all because of taerae, all because he couldn't just shut up, all because of his stupid insecurities that he couldn't keep to himself. he hates himself, he hates that he couldn't just shut up.

now, all he has is a memory.

that stupid purple cardigan.

[rosinbae]

SORRY THIS IS LATE I WAS FIGHTING GOD EARLIER TODAY SO 😜 writing this as i read 🥶

''he remembers listening to hanbin console a concerned junghyun as he desperately covered his ears, trying to cover out any mention of y/n and his horrible state, too afraid to think about if he would even wake up the next day.'' so u want me to DIE

"i'm not gonna make it, taerae" he says, a sad smile coming to his face as he says those words. "it's not meant for me". excuse me, it is meant for u 🤓☝🏼

"i know that this is all i've been working for and giving up is horrible but at this point, there is nothing that'll make me debut". POOKIE DONT EVEN

''first our debut was canceled and then we get thrown into a stupid survival show and it's like wakeone is doing everything to prevent me from debuting'' R U READY TO DIE WAKEONE

((all of the following dialogue where y/n is like ''bro my ass is NOT making it'' is so angsty CAN U HEAR MY HEART SHATTER INTO A MILLION PIECES ISA WAS IT WORTH IT))

''y/n reaches for taerae's hand and simply places it on his cheek, wiping his own tears. "i wanted us to debut together, y/n" taerae mutters, and y/n gives a small hum.

"i'm so sorry" he mumbles, as if he's at fault for something. he wants to debut with taerae too, he promised him the first time they met that they would debut together somehow, even if the circumstances are weird.'' IM GONNA DIE this part specifically is so beautiful bc its like that one moment where they both accept the truth and WAKEONE U NEED TO DIE 🤬🤬🤬🤬 KYS WAKEONE

anwyays like usual im taking another bite off ur walls have a good day stay angsty and stay loving taerae 😜😜😜😜

I LOVE THESE LONG EXTENDED FEEDBACKS FULL OF YOUR FAVORITE LINES IT ALWAYS MAKES MY DAY 🤭

I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO DIE I WAS HALF ASLEEP WHEN I WROTE THIS I SWEAR‼️

[rosinbae]

shattered ⋆ kim taerae

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ where unfortunately for kim taerae, the truth hurts, and pierces his heart right where it shouldn't.

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ literally just angst.

◜✧◞ WARNINGS ─ mentions of overworking and passing out.

taerae knows this is a bad sign.

y/n only practices until three in the morning if he genuinely feels sick to his stomach, if he genuinely feels that he isn't doing good enough and has to work extra hard so that he doesn't disappoint anyone watching his performance.

unfortunately, this isn't a newly developed habit, y/n has been doing this ever since he first joined wakeone as a trainee. if he got an especially bad scolding from the dance instructor, he'd practice himself to death to try and prove them wrong.

he'd do anything just to make sure he wasn't lacking in any of his skills, anything about his performance that made someone else upset was immediately something he had to fix.

even it meant practicing so hard he would just collapse onto the floor of the practice room.

taerae remembers feeling afraid.

he remembers listening to hanbin console a concerned junghyun as he desperately covered his ears, trying to cover out any mention of y/n and his horrible state, too afraid to think about if he would even wake up the next day.

y/n is fragile, he takes many things to heart, though he doesn't cry as often as he used to, he constantly tries to prove others wrong by doing his best. of course he always does do his best but then there's something else to be nitpicked and then he has to fix that too.

he can just never win.

like at the moment.

taerae is usually a heavy sleeper, he doesn't wake up easily no matter what, but as he stares at the clock beside his bed, the one which reads 3:42 am, he feels a pit form in his stomach as he notices y/n's empty bed beside him.

he flinches upon hearing the door open, but relaxes as soon as he sees the familiar figure of y/n. his relaxation doesn't last long, though, because he sees how worn out y/n looks, and it's enough to make him frown.

"hi".

"hi" taerae smiles. even though he expects that to be the end of that, but y/n stares at him for a moment, which gets taerae worried.

"can i sit with you?"

"shouldn't you go to sleep?" taerae mutters, he feels that's the right thing to say because they have to wake up early tomorrow. tomorrow being the day which determines what the next 2 and a half years of their lives may look like.

y/n doesn't listen, and taerae doesn't bother. he's tired, exhausted, frustrated from having to perform the same song for five hours, worried that he may not debut, and may not debut with one of his friends in fact. when taerae makes space for him, he sits by him and simply blinks.

"taerae" he starts, and taerae simply stares back at him. he always liked it when y/n said his name, because it was like he pronounced each letter with surprising precision, as if they were all equally important to pronounce. "i don't have a good feeling".

"does that have to do with your or practicing all day again?" he asks rather loudly, making him cover his mouth. that is what gets a small laugh out of y/n, and that makes taerae feel glad, because it's been a while since he's laughed.

"i'm not gonna make it, taerae" he says, a sad smile coming to his face as he says those words. "it's not meant for me".

taerae furrows his eyebrows. "y/n—"

"i know that this is all i've been working for and giving up is horrible but at this point, there is nothing that'll make me debut".

"what makes you think that?" taerae wants him to be wrong, he wants to try and convince y/n that he deserves that spot, because he does. he worked his ass off every day, always did better each time if he got the smallest scolding, took care of his fellow wakeone trainees, even if he wasn't taking care of himself.

there is nothing that can convince taerae that he doesn't deserve to debut, he did so much, he tried so hard, giving up is never what he does.

but it seems he's too tired now.

"i constantly try, constantly try my best but then there's something wrong with my performance and i can never do anything correctly! i'm tired of trying taerae, first our debut was canceled and then we get thrown into a stupid survival show and it's like wakeone is doing everything to prevent me from debuting, i'm tired.."

his eyes well up with tears, and taerae doesn't remember the last time he's seen him like that. "i just want to debut, it's been two years and i've achieved nothing".

"but that's not true" taerae argues, and y/n takes in a deep breath, not wanting to sob in taerae's bed at three in the morning. "y/n, you can't give up yet, were so close.."

"no you're so close" y/n confirms, making taerae shut his eyes. "as much as i wanna debut, it's not gonna be possible. i wanted to debut with you, and hanbin, and jeonghyeon, woonggi, and sungmin but, fuck we can't, we just can't, there is really nothing left for me".

taerae wants to try so hard to tell him that he's wrong, to tell him that he's gonna make it, and he'll finally achieve his dreams of debuting, but it's not that y/n thinks he won't, he knows he won't debut.

he's tried so hard, time and time again, he'd put on a brave face as to not worry anybody, but he hates that all of efforts are looked over, and that he won't get a place in the debut lineup.

"taerae, i believe in you".

but why won't you believe in yourself? taerae desperately wants to say, he wants to give him hope, wants to tell him that everything's gonna be okay and that they're gonna laugh together tomorrow when they both end up debuting.

but it was the truth, y/n wasn't gonna make it, he can't climb over nine ranks in the span of the night. even if he's talented, even if he's worked so hard to the point that he's passed out, even with how many times he failed and continued to try, it didn't matter. not to the voters, not to the mnet editors, not to anyone.

taerae wants all of that be a lie. he wants to close his eyes and open them to see all of his wakeone friends laughing over stupid jokes, he just wants to be happy, wants y/n to be happy.

he just wants to live in a world where he can debut with all of his friends, where y/n will finally be recognized for his talents, where they can finally debut together like how y/n promised back in their first year as wakeone trainees.

y/n reaches for taerae's hand and simply places it on his cheek, wiping his own tears. "i wanted us to debut together, y/n" taerae mutters, and y/n gives a small hum.

"i'm so sorry" he mumbles, as if he's at fault for something. he wants to debut with taerae too, he promised him the first time they met that they would debut together somehow, even if the circumstances are weird.

taerae hates that this is the truth, he hates that this is the unfortunate way y/n has to tell him that he can't make it, even though taerae thinks he deserves it more than anyone. "you deserve to debut, you worked so hard".

"everybody did" he sighs. "there's just no more hope for me, taerae".

taerae stares at y/n, who simply rests against his palm. he then looks back to the clock beside his bed.

4:03 am.

[rosinbae]

''he knew y/n first, not hanbin. he always made sure to make him a gift on each of his birthdays, he was the one who always spent extra time with him in the kitchen when they would bake together during sleepovers, he was the one who always made sure y/n would be safe from the cold, he was the one who always let y/n crash at his house whenever he had an especially bad fight with his mom.

he'd make sure to sit down and run his fingers through y/n's hair whenever he'd fall asleep on his lap.'' ISAAAAAAA AUGHGHGGHHGH THIS PART SPECIFICALLY IS SO UEEUEEUE

''zhang hao smiles, sitting down in front of him. "talk to me, what's up?" he inquires, and taerae simply gives an awkward smile.'' hao u r so babagrill tysm

"well.. i mean i— guess" U GUESS

''my heart? the heart that's only focus is on y/n and only y/n—'' EXACTLYYYY

"you probably would get a prison sentence" junghyun comments, making y/n frown. "but for like— attempting to rob a convenience store then breaking down mid robbery". this is so me core for some reason dont ask why tho

"taerae doesn't even like him!" y/n counters, but it doesn't make him sound any better. "i just don't think they fit together". OOOOOO

"guys!" jeonghyeon yells over both of them, now having some sort of 'solution' to this situation. "let's just set up y/n and taerae instead, since they both like each other!" EXACTLYLYLYYL U R SO SMART JEONGHYEON

THIS IS SO LONG I LOVE IT

ANYWAYS THIS WAS PROBABLY MY FAV CHAPTER TO WRITE BECAUSE WRITING JEALOUSY IS SO FUN IM TELLING YOU

ALSO JEONGHYEON IS THE SMARTEST CHARACTER IM TELLING YOU‼️ HES ACTUALLY THEIR WINGMAN FR FR 🙏

IM GLAD I COULD MAKE YOU GO CRAZY AND IM GLAD YOU LOVE MY WRITING ELIF <33333

[rosinbae]

attention ⋆ listen to your heart

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ ever since he can remember, jang y/n has always had a crush on park hanbin. every other day he simply couldn't help but giggle and kick his feet at the sight of him, but now as his senior year begins, he finds his feelings for someone else, specifically his best friend kim taerae, to be much stronger than any feelings he could have had for park hanbin.

◜✧◞ LINKS ─ masterlist | previous | next

sometimes taerae wonders..

what does hanbin have that he doesn't?

what makes park hanbin so special that y/n doesn't think of him as only a friend and is utterly in love with him? how come when he looks at hanbin like how he looks at taerae, it's different? why can't he experience what it's like to love someone like that?

probably because the person doesn't love him back. whenever he listens to y/n talk about hanbin, how great he is, how much of a crush he has on him, he wants to punch himself in the face.

he doesn't even know why y/n sees him as so special, maybe he's just being purely jealous now but taerae's been through almost every important moment in his life with y/n.

he knew y/n first, not hanbin. he always made sure to make him a gift on each of his birthdays, he was the one who always spent extra time with him in the kitchen when they would bake together during sleepovers, he was the one who always made sure y/n would be safe from the cold, he was the one who always let y/n crash at his house whenever he had an especially bad fight with his mom.

he'd make sure to sit down and run his fingers through y/n's hair whenever he'd fall asleep on his lap.

hanbin never did that.

now, taerae knows he can't control who y/n loves, of course he can't, but taerae can't control the fact that he's in love with y/n either, and he also can't control his insane jealousy.

he hates that park hanbin, the park hanbin who doesn't even love y/n back, has said boy wrapped around his finger even though he doesn't even return his feelings.

call him selfish or whatever, but he doesn't think hanbin deserves something he wants so badly.

he couldn't even say these thoughts out loud, though, because y/n was still utterly in love with park hanbin, the same park hanbin who was also his friend. he couldn't risk anything, even if he was insanely jealous about y/n's crush on hanbin.

he had to be a good friend.

"deep in your thoughts again, taerae?" said boy snaps up and meets the smiling figure of zhang hao. he just sighs, shaking his head.

"i just.. have a lot on my mind".

zhang hao smiles, sitting down in front of him. "talk to me, what's up?" he inquires, and taerae simply gives an awkward smile.

ever since they met, zhang hao has been willing to listen to taerae vent about his feelings. he always seemed to know when taerae was going through something, and would stay put as taerae explained everything going on in his life. he'd listen, process the words, and wouldn't judge as he gave taerae actual good advice.

"well, uh—" taerae contemplates on what he should say, whether he should be open and honest about his crush or disguise it as something else.

"i have a.. situation" zhang hao hums, clasping his hands together as he stares at taerae. "i have this friend, who i've known for so long, who i now sort of may be in love with— but said friend is in love with someone else and i don't know what to do because the person said friend is crushing on doesn't love them back so—"

taerae pauses midway through his sentence, finding his own words confusing. he begins playing with his fingers, and zhang hao gives a small laugh as he tilts his head.

"do you really like this friend taerae?" he asks, already having a hint of who taerae was talking about, but he didn't actively say so.

"well.. i mean i— guess" he mutters, picking at his nails. "i never really took the time to consider it because they were always talking about how they liked someone else, and i didn't want to get in between that".

"you can't control your feelings taerae" zhang hao states. "this other person has never shown any romantic feelings back?"

"nope, they honestly treat it like a joke if anything" taerae grits his teeth. "not to insult that person, of course, it's just disappointing because my friend keeps getting friend zoned and i feel like i could treat them so much better but they can't just open their eyes and notice my feelings!"

"so your jealous?" zhang hao looks surprised. "i never expected that from you of all people".

what's that supposed to mean?—taerae asks in his mind, and it seems that zhang hao reads his mind because he answers only a second later.

"what i mean is, i'm just so used to you being so smiley about everything, you always support your friends with their relationships and such, it's kind of shocking to see you be honest and jealous".

taerae's eyes flicker down back to the table, and zhang hao speaks up once again.

"go for it".

"i'm sorry?" taerae immediately says, chuckling in disbelief. zhang hao keeps the same face he had when he said those words.

"what? if the person doesn't like them back, what's stopping you from asking them out?"

"cause they still like the person, hao" taerae whines, covering his face with his hands. "i can't do that to them they're my best friend in the whole world".

"but you're not doing anything if they know the person doesn't like them back already!"

"but they're already so far gone, hyung! they just continue crushing like their life depends on it! they're probably gonna still be in love by the end of the year!"

"listen taerae" zhang hao starts, resting his chin onto his hand. "i won't force you to do anything, but you have a good opportunity here, there may never be another one like this, but if you don't want to do it, i won't force you to".

taerae simply stares, making sure to listen to his words carefully. "just do what you think is right, taerae, listen to your heart".

my heart? the heart that's only focus is on y/n and only y/n—

what taerae's hearts saying is clear.

confess to the boy before it's too late.

"okay so what did your mom say exactly?"

y/n looks through the collection of books in his room, none of them really catching his eye. his headphones were in as he listens to his friends go on about random stuff. he was currently in a call with hanbin, taerae, jeonghyeon, junghyun, and woonggi, he'd just told them about the whole interaction he had with his mom the night prior.

"oh" he begins. "she just totally accused me of doing illegal shit even though i was at the library, called you guys stupid, i defended you guys and we kind of sort of got into a fight".

"wait— she called us stupid!?" jeonghyeon shouts, piercing y/n's ears. "that's crazy! were the only people making sure you're not being killed!"

"right! were protecting you! not endangering you!" hanbin also argues, and y/n specifically chuckles as he says that.

"wait— what'd she even accuse you of?" taerae asks, and y/n shuffles as he finally finds a book that he likes.

"what she always does, i know she doesn't want me to end up like my dad, with a prison sentence and all".

"you probably would get a prison sentence" junghyun comments, making y/n frown. "but for like— attempting to rob a convenience store then breaking down mid robbery".

"i feel like taerae would do that instead" woonggi states, and taerae makes a noise of surprise on the other line. "he seems like the kind of person to cry during a robbery because he feels bad".

"that's true!"

"hey!" taerae yells, a voice crack prominent in that yell. "i don't accept this bullying!"

"but you totally would do that!" jeonghyeon adds, and taerae let’s our another sound of annoyance. "i'm sorry rae, it just seems like you".

"how great.." taerae mutters, and y/n laughs, mumbling about how cute he sounds.

unbeknownst to him, taerae catches such words.

no one could guess how red he looked on the other side of the line.

"so" jeonghyeon begins, giggling to himself at the question he was about to ask. "are we still planning to set up taerae and junhyeon?"

"i don't know" hanbin mumbles. "i just don't see it.."

"well you don't see a lot of things do you hanbin?" taerae especially mutters under his breath. y/n hears it and lets out another laugh, finding the words hilarious.

taerae goes silent, picking his nails, his mind racing with thoughts.

"guys, does taerae even like junhyeon?" y/n asks as a wake up call to everyone. "the whole point of a relationship is mutual attraction, right?"

"how ironic of you to say that, n/n" jeonghyeon reminds him, making y/n roll his eyes on the other line.

"hey! shut up!"

"i mean i guess he's cute.." taerae mumbles. "but i don't like him like that" he instantly responds, continuing to pick at his nails.

"see? it'd be a waste of time to set them up!" y/n replies rather eagerly, making junghyun let out a small 'ooh' as he listens to his tone of voice.

"why don't you want us to set them up, y/n?" woonggi questions, a teasing tone in his voice.

"taerae doesn't even like him!" y/n counters, but it doesn't make him sound any better. "i just don't think they fit together".

"what an interesting observation, y/n" hanbin immediately says, making said boy gasp.

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"what do you think it means? huh?"

"hey!"

taerae listens to his friends argue, he doesn't even mind that they are, because they always are. "what do you think taerae?"

"huh?" said boy snaps out his zoned out daze. "think? about what?"

"y/n and keita?"

"wait when did i agree to that?" y/n whines, and jeonghyeon lets out a mischievous laugh like the little shit he is. "you can't discuss setting me up!"

"you tried to set me up with that random guy last year and it went horrible wrong!"

"because you're shit when it comes to love!"

"are you really bringing that up, jang y/n? with your crumbling love life and thousands of unrequited crushes?"

"don't bring that up i'm a fragile man!" y/n argues, a pout on his lips, even though his friends couldn't see it.

"ah, your not antifragile" junghyun says in a tone of fake disappointment.

as woonggi begins loudly and obnoxiously singing antifragile, as taerae chuckles and jeonghyeon begins complaining about how his singing is bad.

y/n simply laughs as he listens to his friends create a ruckus, all the noises they're making right in his ears. "i still wanna set up keita and y/n".

"jeonghyeon i thought we agreed that we weren't gonna do that!"

"you mean you agreed!" junghyun yells. "i didn't agree on anything!"

"fuck you junghyun!"

"no fuck you, y/n!"

"guys!" jeonghyeon yells over both of them, now having some sort of 'solution' to this situation. "let's just set up y/n and taerae instead, since they both like each other!"

taerae chokes on his spit.

and y/n laughs like a crazy person.

what an amazing pair, huh?

◜✧◞ TAGS (open):

@jinkiseason, @big-uwu-stan, @harus-simp, @zerobaseonefics, @hwangsm1le

[rosinbae]

kitty kat ⋆ shen ricky

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ in which ricky realizes he might be in love with his best friend after all.

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ shen ricky x male!reader

◜✧◞ GENRE ─ fluff.

"y/n my eye itches".

"stop moving or i'll accidentally poke you".

ricky scrunches his nose as y/n completely focuses on doing his eyeliner, ignoring his complaints which come up every two seconds.

"ricky i swear to god" y/n grits his teeth, biting his bottom lip. "i need you to stay still before you end up having ink in your eye".

"when you agreed to help me i didn't think you meant threaten me" ricky comments, and y/n rolls his eyes.

"your lucky" he states. "you have pretty eyes".

ricky resists the urge to blink, he can't because then y/n will kill him. "what does that have to do with anything?"

"they're perfectly shaped for this kind of thing".

"that's a pretty weird compliment.."

"take it or leave it kat".

that was the nickname y/n had given him when they were younger, stating that ricky was pretty much identical to a cat. no one really got the nickname, since ricky only allowed y/n to call him that, it was like their little thing.

ricky would never admit that he liked seeing y/n up close much more than he realized, with y/n's focus on doing his eyeliner, he could simply stare right at him and it wouldn't be weird.

"what if my mom thinks i look bad?" ricky decides to ask randomly. y/n narrows his eyes, but simply hums as a small laugh escapes his lips.

"you never look bad" he responds honestly, finally moving away from ricky as he finishes. "there, you're done" he says, but ricky still doesn't blink, afraid.

"you can blink kat, it's okay".

ricky immediately blinks, resisting the urge to rub his eyes because he knows it'll possibly mess up what y/n just spend thirty minutes doing. "see? you look pretty, told you".

ricky feels his face heat up, which is weird because y/n compliments him all the time. he just feels.. different towards all the nice words y/n keeps saying.

am i going insane? why is my temperature rising? and my heart beating faster? he just called you pretty ricky what are you going on about—

"hello? earth to ricky?" y/n snaps his fingers, handing ricky a cup of strawberry milk. "what are you thinking about? the event?" he inquires, not knowing that he was the one running through ricky's mind as he takes a sip of his iced coffee.

"um.." ricky pauses, not knowing if he should tell him the truth or lie. he chose lie. "just— a lot".

"no need to worry, kat" y/n says, smiling at ricky but staring for a specifically long time. "you don't even have to do much, your mom's doing all the talking anyway".

"i know i'm just.. thinking".

"maybe you should think a little less" y/n states, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. "focus on me, i have to take you out after the event anyway".

holy mother of god—

ricky felt like he was gonna combust. how could y/n just say that so casually not knowing how much of an affect such words had on ricky? he felt like he should've exploded by any minute now.

"fine, since you want my attention so bad" ricky mutters, not knowing why he felt so embarrassed.

"i don't want it i need it" y/n says with sarcasm in his voice once again, before ricky can even respond to such words, y/n took his wrist and dragged him out of the room.

"uh, y/n? where are we going?"

"i'm gonna take you to the event silly! i'm the only one of us that can drive!"

as ricky stares at y/n, doing the simplest of things, he can't help but just.. admire him, he looks so endearing even though he's doing something as simple as finding his car keys.

ricky's eyes go wide as he realizes.

oh shit, i'm in love with him.

now it all makes sense.

[rosinbae]

Y/N POOKIE GET BEHIND ME I WILL PROTECT YOU 💯💯 and also taerae and WHO i only know y/nrae tf 🥶 is this what u meant by poor taerae

wish i had a tutor like taerae 🙏🏼 i did not learn SHIT during class

NOT Y/N'S MOM BEING BASED ON MINE LMFAO

this is not what i meant by poor taerae 👀 dw he'll suffer soon 😈

[rosinbae]

attention ⋆ delinquent?

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ ever since he can remember, jang y/n has always had a crush on park hanbin. every other day he simply couldn't help but giggle and kick his feet at the sight of him, but now as his senior year begins, he finds his feelings for someone else, specifically his best friend kim taerae, to be much stronger than any feelings he could have had for park hanbin.

◜✧◞ LINKS ─ masterlist | previous | next

y/n knows how bad of a person others think he is.

he hears the whispers from the older people who live in the neighborhood, people say he's stuck up, a troublemaker, delinquent, all that nice stuff that he enjoys overhearing as he listens to jeonghyeon complain about his boring love life on the phone.

he stopped getting offended after a while, he learned how to get used to it.

ever since dad left, moms barely been home. she used to be able to work the morning shift but now she has to work from eight pm to six am as a nurse practitioner to make extra money for her two sons. when she is home, she's asleep due to having sleepless nights.

eunwoo constantly reminds him to not do anything which gets mom upset, says she's too stressed out with saving lives all night.

y/n constantly replies by saying he doesn't do anything that upsets mom, the only reason their relationship is strained is because of his sexuality, and his friends, and how she sent him to a summer camp instead of helping him when he went through his depressive episodes.

he loves his mom, he really does, but he struggles to have a good relationship with her after all that's unfolded these past few years.

he feels like he doesn't even know her anymore.

his mind wanders as his thoughts become much more depressing than usual, but he quickly snaps out of it when he hears jeonghyeon yell.

"please! you'd never!"

"oh i would!"

jeonghyeon and hanbin arguing is normal, y/n simply blinks and his eyes shift to the side. that's when jeonghyeon pushes his shoulder, making him yelp. "y/n!"

"huh, what?"

"think about this for a second" jeonghyeon starts. "taerae" he places his hands on said boy's shoulder. "and junhyeon" he finally states, and the older looks surprised by those words.

"junhyeon?"

"oh you two would totally be cute!" woonggi exclaims. "we have to set them up!" he jumps up in excitement, but taerae simply chuckles and shakes his head.

"i don't think so".

jeonghyeon immediately looks surprised when y/n says that, but taerae looks even more surprised at the words.

"i mean—" y/n pauses, laughing to himself as he tries to find a way to explain it. "they do look cute, but.."

"but?" jeonghyeon tilts his head, tightening his grip on taerae's shoulders, which makes the older one wince. "you disagree, y/n? i would love to hear your opinion on this pairing?"

jeonghyeon i am literally gonna kill you—taerae says with his eyes, and the lee simply giggles, nudging him with his elbow. "come on y/n, give taerae some advice".

y/n momentarily glanced to hanbin, who quickly covers his mouth to laugh. "well i— i just don't think they're that compatible, that's all".

y/n doesn't know what this weird feeling that keeps circulating around his stomach is. he has no kind of hatred towards junhyeon, he doesn't! he just doesn't know why he feels so weird about thinking about them as a couple.

it's not like taerae's his boyfriend or anything..

"oh?" jeonghyeon raises an eyebrow, and taerae quickly pushes his hands off his shoulders. "not that compatible huh?" he says to himself, giggling at a certain thought he was having.

woonggi looks between the two. from taerae to y/n, to y/n, to taerae again. "um" he presses his lips into a thin line. "seunghwan said he was gonna pick me up today so.. i kinda have to go".

"yeah i have to" hanbin pauses, looking as if he's searching for an excuse. "my mom told me to get home early! right jeonghyeon?" he grits his teeth as he grabs the younger's arm.

"what?" he asks, but then he makes an 'ah' face. "oh right! yeah! um.. were gonna make cupcakes!"

taerae narrows his eyes at the obvious lie, but he simply nods. "alright, bring us some".

"oh we will!"

"we totally will!"

hanbin drags jeonghyeon out of the room and the younger waves at him.

taerae blinks, taking off his glasses as he rubs his eyes. "look at us" he says, "getting an early start with our calculs tutoring".

"please go easy on me" y/n begs sarcastically, a small pout coming to his lips. he feels himself have a pain in his stomach when taerae pulls out a calculus textbook.

"can't make any promises".

taerae smirks and y/n just laughs.

it's only seven pm.

it's funny how a tutor session with taerae taught him more about calculus than his teacher ever has in a double period. his mind is drifting away as he walks home, completely forgetting all he did in his day because his only focus is getting home safely.

opening the door with his spare key, y/n almost immediately jumps when he sees his mother right in his face, standing there with a look of disappointed look on her face.

"hi mom" he says. he knows that stare, that stare which means she's gonna yell at him for something that he probably can't control or accuse him of doing something that he can't ever fathom doing. "everything okay?"

"y/n" she asks, taking in a deep breath. "it is seven o'clock, where the hell have you been?"

"at school!" he immediately says. "i went to school like normal and after school let out i went to the library to study".

"to the library?" she questions, as if she can't believe such words. "y/n, who spends four hours studying?"

"i was being tutored" y/n replies, he can't even believe that his mother would think he's lying, even after all the times he tried. "do you seriously not believe me? what else would i be doing?"

"i don't know y/n, what else would you be doing?" she asks accusingly, crossing her arms as she straightens her work uniform. "it's not like i know you anymore, you could be doing anything! probably hanging out with those stupid boys—"

"my friends aren't stupid!" y/n takes in a breath, realizing he'd yelled at his mom. "they're better than you, they actually care about my well being! do you think your being a good mother by accusing me of literal crimes? like you've done thousands of times before?"

"i'm looking out for you!"

"looking out for me? you don't do that! because your afraid i'm going to be like dad!"

his mother goes silent, taking in a deep breath as she covers her face with her hands. he was right, he knew he was by her unconventional silence.

"i'm just.. i'm going to sleep" he mutters, walking past his mother and running up the stairs.

he does slam the door to his room, obviously.

he's upset.

◜✧◞ TAGS (open):

@jinkiseason, @big-uwu-stan, @harus-simp, @zerobaseonefics, @hwangsm1le

[rosinbae]

I love you and thank you for making zb1 fics, your works are very entertaining and are masterpieces❤️

-❄️ (I'd use this for identification)

oh thank you :) your so sweet <3

[rosinbae]

Y/N CALCULUS HATER SO TRUE 🙏🙏 im sorry im gonna just take a chunk off ur walls yk idk why i eat walls but 😍😍😍 AWOOOUGGHGHGHH UR WRITINGGGG ISA shakes u like a ragdoll "he doesnt know why it feels so right to hold his hand" AEUFFHHFHDH i love being delusional 🤗🤗

CALCULUS HATERS RISE‼️

SOMEONE HAD TO NOTICE THAT LINE AKWHWUAH I WAS LITERALLY GIGGLING WHILE WRITING IT THEIR SO IN LOVE BUT THEY'RE IDIOTS

[rosinbae]

attention ⋆ calculus is ass

◜✧◞ PAIRING ─ kim taerae x male!reader

◜✧◞ SYNOPSIS ─ ever since he can remember, jang y/n has always had a crush on park hanbin. every other day he simply couldn't help but giggle and kick his feet at the sight of him, but now as his senior year begins, he finds his feelings for someone else, specifically his best friend kim taerae, to be much stronger than any feelings he could have had for park hanbin.

◜✧◞ LINKS ─ masterlist | previous | next

"who the hell gives you calculus homework after teaching you no calculs!?"

jeonghyeon listens to y/n go on about how his teacher is horrible and couldn't teach for shit, he simply hums. it's so casual for y/n to scream and shout in the morning, complaining about calculus homework he wasn't even gonna do anyways.

"i offered to help you!" hanbin exclaims, scoffing. "you didn't let me!" he squeaks, and y/n rolls his eyes.

"oh did you? as if the last time you helped me with homework i didn't get half the answers wrong!"

"that wasn't my fault! blame the teacher!"

taerae leaned his head against his hand, sighing. he was surprised that y/n could actually talk to hanbin without stuttering, or stumbling over his words, or fainting.

though he may have felt a little.. weird watching them interact, what was he gonna say about it? he kept his eyes closed, keeping his head in his hands.

jeonghyeon blinks, noticing his silence, he gives one glance to y/n and hanbin, who are giggling about something, and he gets it. he snickers as he thinks about what's going through taerae's mind, because he knows exactly what he's thinking.

it's only six in the morning, and taerae is already having second thoughts.

"taerae~~~"

y/n drags his feet across the hallway towards the figure of his best friend, who seems so far away despite him being close. he hears taerae yelp when he wraps his arms around his waist and rests his head onto his back.

"what the hell happened to you?"

"calculs happened! who made that a class!?"

taerae blinks, chuckling at the words. he pats y/n's waist, they're normally like this, it's really nothing out of the ordinary. taerae can't help but find y/n endearing, he's cute like this.

"poor you, suffering" he says sarcastically, and y/n picks his head up to glare at him. "what? i was just being honest, you need to take your classes more seriously if your gonna graduate this year".

y/n pulls away, one arm still around taerae's waist, he stares at taerae for a second, then a knowing smile crosses his face. taerae looks concerned, then he immediately shakes his head.

"taerae, your my best friend right?"

"nope" he immediately says, shaking his head once again. "i know what your thinking and i'm not gonna do it" he's dead serious, and y/n simply gives a small chuckle.

"just for this year! tutor me so i don't fail calculus—"

"no i already said that i won't y/n".

"please taerae?" y/n begs, and taerae looks at him like he's insane. "i'll listen! i swear! if i fail calculus this year than i can't graduate and then mom is gonna beat my ass! please?"

taerae furrows his eyebrows, though he bites his inner cheek, remembering y/n's situation. "y/n, i have to do a lot.."

"but your free every wednesday and friday!" he yells, taerae doesn't remember when y/n took his hand, and he doesn't know why it feels so right to hold his hand either. "come on, i know we can make it work".

taerae stares at his best friend for a seconds, watching him bat his eyelashes so prettily. doesn't he know how much of an effect he has on taerae? this is bad for taerae's mental health.

"i—" taerae groans. "fine" he grits his teeth, and y/n gasps, jumping up and down as he squeals in excitement.

"yay! thank you thank you thank you!" he cheers as he pulls taerae into the tightest hug ever, making him freeze in surprise. of course he's hugged y/n before, but there was something special about his hugs that made taerae get so nervous.

he slowly wraps his arms around y/n's body, his heart warming up when he feels y/n rest his head onto his shoulder. he gives such good hugs—taerae thinks to himself, but he doesn't realize that he also says it too.

"hm? what'd you say?" y/n asks, hearing a small mumble from him but not the exact words.

"huh?" taerae goes a bright red, not knowing that his words were even heard. "nothing" he quickly says, not knowing if he could even come up with an excuse.

"oh" y/n's gaze falls down. "okay".

oh lord.

jang y/n is gonna be the death of kim taerae.

◜✧◞ TAGS (open):

@jinkiseason, @big-uwu-stan, @harus-simp, @zerobaseonefics, @hwangsm1le

[rosinbae]

AM I HALLUCINATING HELLO i swear u had a post asking for which member u should write the trope for but!?!?!?

HELP I DELETED IT BC I THOUGHT I SHOULD JUST ASK YOU 😭