.⋆˙⟡•.⋆₊°❀°₊⋆.•⟡˙⋆.

⟡20⟡

[rotten-flowerss]

♥︎ About me ♥︎

age: 20 yrs (she/her)

hw: 70kg (155lbs)

lw: 54kg (120lbs)

cw: 56.5kg (124.5lbs)

height: 163cm (5’4 ft)

♥︎ Goals ♥︎

🔓gw1: 66kg (145lbs)✔️

🔓gw2: 57kg (125lbs) ✔️

🔒gw3: 48kg (105lbs) ❌

🔒ugw: 39kg (85lbs) ❌

pls don’t report, minor dni (18+)

[rotten-flowerss]

i’ve been stuck in a binge/restrict cycle for the past month 😭🔫 luckily i’m still the same weight, but ughhh i just wanna lose weight. i have to lock in

maintaining is better than gaining. that’s the only thing that’s keeping me sane rn

[rotten-flowerss]

i’ve hit a sort of plateau, i’ve been 125lbs for a while now. part of me feels lucky it’s the same cause i’ve been sort of binging for the past few days. i feel like ive put too much pressure on myself with calories that it ends up backfiring. i’m upping my cal intake limit to 1,500 to get back into things and hopefully fix my plateau issue. if anyone has any suggestions or think the calories are too high please lmk and give all recommendations pls :)

[rotten-flowerss]

genuinely want moots that actually text me/respond. someone who will keep me accountable, or just someone i can talk to about my journey/in general🫠

dm me pls (19+ and female only) i’m 20 and don’t wanna talk to minors. if u wanna dm pls don’t be a weirdo, i have a boyfriend and don’t want someone to pressure me into sending inappropriate pics or anything sexual

[rotten-flowerss]

today’s summary

calories ate: 683

workout: 1 hour

i didn’t want to eat so much but i genuinely felt like shit. tmr i work so i’d rather not pass during my shift 🫠 luckily i’ve been fasting every other day and working out everyday so it should balance out.

[rotten-flowerss]

just did two 30min workout videos and lowkey feel like passing out. but im proud of myself for working out today. i might take a nap now 🙂‍↕️

[rotten-flowerss]

update on the father’s day breakfast

i only ordered a side of toast and a side of bacon. i was able to get away with eating only eating 1/2 wheat toast slice and 1/2 strip of bacon. i crushed up a few pieces of bacon and toast into a napkin and shoved the rest in my purse to throw away after.

so a rough estimate i ate is 44 calories. i wish i didnt have to eat but at least i ate as little as possible. but i cleared my plate so my family didn’t ask questions or comment on it

i prob could have gone without eating in general but it might have been suspicious i wasn’t chewing. now thinking abt it i could have faked chewing but oh well 🫠

[rotten-flowerss]

super proud of myself today.

i’m 26.5 hrs into my fast. earlier today i went on a 2 hour walk which consisted of walking to a store, walking around inside and walking home. then i did a 1.5 hour walk with some stairs too, and when i got home i did an abs workout.

i’m so sad tho that i’m probably gonna have to break my fast in the morning cause of father’s day breakfast. i’m gonna try to get away with not eating but we’ll see. i’ll keep u all updated 💗

[rotten-flowerss]

currently 1am, just finished a 2hr and 20min workout, hopefully that was enough to burn off the food i ate.

i’m still so upset i broke my fast at 47hrs. but like i said in my last post the eating window was less than an hour. i did a long workout as a reset and hopefully my fast will go better this time 🫠😔

[rotten-flowerss]

bro i was 47 hrs into my fast and my bf convinced me to eat 😭🔫 i have to stop giving in. i can’t help it tho, he’s so sweet and loves me so much, he makes me feel safe and wanted. he tells me he loves me just the way i am and he doesn’t care about my weight and tells me im already skinny.

i feel comforted in the moment and okay to eat but i always regret it after. idk what to do. luckily the eating window was less than an hour and now i’m gonna start another fast. hopefully this time i’ll actually last the 48hrs or longer.

[rotten-flowerss]

genuine question: i’ve seen a lot of people post abt taking vitamins to support health while restricting, what vitamins are you taking/which ones do you recommend?

[rotten-flowerss]

my birthday has finally passed, time to lock in again 🫠🙂‍↕️

[rotten-flowerss]

yesterday was also a fail 😭🔫 my sister offered food and i gave in. i ate wayyy tooo much. today so far ive already done a 2 hr work out. i feel disgusting…

[rotten-flowerss]

sooo i ended up ignoring cals yesterday 😭 i got carried away with family and was actually enjoying my birthday celebration. my actual birthday is on Tuesday and my boyfriend is taking me out to dinner.

i’m telling myself that it’s okay, it’s only 3 days of the month and i’ll lock back in like i was before this.

i’m planning to continue to restrict like planned today and tmr. also do a 24 hr fast from tmr(monday) at 6pm till till tuesday at 6pm since that’s when i’m going to dinner with my boyfriend.

i’m not letting this fully set me back. i feel like such a fake when i do things like this. like am i actually disordered, am i just being dramatic?

[rotten-flowerss]

i gave in a little too early. instead of waiting for my birthday stuff tmr and tuesday, i ate wingstop and other baked treats tn 😭🔫

sooo i take back what i said in my last post.

I have a calorie restriction goal/calendar for the month of june but ofc things haven’t gone as planned. i’ve calculated all the cals i’ve ate so far in the past few days, including today. then i adjusted the cals for the rest of the month so that the end total calories for the month is still the same as the original: 14,000 cals

my boyfriend says “that’s not how it works” and idk maybe it doesn’t. but if my original goal in the calendar was 14,000 for the entire month and i still get that same number at the end then it doesn’t matter the specifics of each day since the big overall is still the same. right ?

do i sound dumb or does it make sense? pls be honest 😭

[rotten-flowerss]

unfortunately i’m giving in 😔 tuesday is my birthday and my boyfriend is taking me to dinner. also tmr is my birthday celebration with my family. so i decided to try and put aside my eating habits so i can enjoy my birthday without worrying abt food/calories.

i’ll probs regret it later, but i will do damage control, it’s a later me problem 🫠

[rotten-flowerss]

finally have access to a scale 😋 no more wondering what i weigh