rat bastard

rat bastard

[rrat-bastard]

The king must step down.

A darkness overtakes, must pass the mantle on.

As your king, I apologize. It has been an honor to stand among the fellow rats.

[thetrueratking]

Dear king, your peasants and I got together and made you this giant wooden rat! You're a terrific and wonderful king and we wanted to build a shrine for what you stand for. Please accept it with love and kindness. Your's truly, detector 24 and all the rats in the kingdom. Also please don't mind the squeaking coming from the giant wooden rat. We forgot to oil the wheels before leaving. <3

Wonderful! I mean, you might’ve gotten a little mixed up. That’s clearly a spider

Excuse me a moment

@sketchyartthings this is a revolt. Seal the trapdoor shut and light it on fire. Make an example.

If I’m mistaken, we can make a new one and pretend it never burned. But I’m not mistaken.

[lolli-popples]

No don't burn it, I like, let me have it.

[ratkingreblogs]

Nevermind y’all! We’re sending this lovely gift to @lolli-popples as a show of goodwill! Everyone go over and pester them

[ratkingreblogs]

We’re sending what’s left of this lovely gift to @lolli-popples as a show of okaywill! Everyone go pester them but in pieces.

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

The king has been defeated by the rats!!!!

The false king fell for an elaborate trap set out by @rrat-bastard and the rat's army!!! We have removed the tyrant king from our lands.

An imposter "king" speaks before you now, pretending the tyrant king was not defeated. We the rats knew that the king would not hesitate to burn rats given the chance. The king had answered my original question, when the king would not stand down for the rats. I asked "are you a king or are you a rat?" The king was in fact not a rat. A king, yes, not a rat king though. I smelled a cat in our private meetings. Hence the king's eager alliance with the cat girls in the past. Which we found out through intense espionage and buttering the king up.

With that important knowledge in rat hands, we decided to trick the king by saying that the trojan rat was squeaking because of the wheels. We knew the king would suspect that there must be rats in there. No questions would be asked, only fire. In reality the wheel was actually just squeaking. Inside the trojan rat was an extremely toxic substance known as chemical TKP-391B. It only kills kings and reacts to fire. I knew the king would be watching the show because of the king's sadistic nature.

You can pretend all day long you're still the real king but the false tyrant king died today. We already have examined the body to confirm and the king was indeed a cat. You're merely a rat noble disguised as the now dead king so you can keep robbing the peasant rats of their taxes. Jokes on you though, we no longer pay our taxes to a false cat kingdom. Your false king was also voted out yesterday if you didn't notice. The rats spoke and took action. The king is no more. How could you support the feline cause? Money? Cheese?

Moving forward, fellow rats, do not listen to fake rumors of this war continuing on the king's front. Though the war still rages in the south with the rat detectors. No more blood will be shed for a false king So proud of all the rats who believed in the true cause of rat. An amazing victory with a karmic twist (didn't have to burn our "gift"). No rats were harmed by us in our efforts. Though we did lose a few beautiful rats along the way. There will be a memorial for them soon.

[rrat-bastard]

Victory is ours. We mourn our lost rats, but their loss was not in vain.

Their families will be compensated in full and then some- and their names will be known in generations to come as those who allowed us to continue our reign.

Thank you for your unwavering loyalty, fellow rats. Your efforts have been recognized with great gratitude. We will feast on 𝖈 𝖍 𝖊 𝖉 𝖉 𝖆 𝖗 and be merry- I bow to you, for you all are the true kings, queens, and those in between.

[rat-detector]

I heard that war has been declared by @thetrueratking. Shall we be fighting?

- @rat-detector-8x

It was not that false king’s declaration, but my own. My stance is clear. Raise war. Light the fires. Raise the banners! We march under the standard that brings death to false kings.

Gather the others @rat-detector-8x

Let them know it is time to rally their own. And go to that damn king’s blog to wage our war. We must burn it all.

[rat-detector-8x]

War has been declared by our God. Prepare yourself

@rat-detector-detector @rat-detector-detector-detector @ratdetectordetectordetectordet @rat-detector-to-the-5th-power @rat-detector-seven @ratdetectortheninth @ratdetector-x11 @rat-detector-twelve @rat-detector-13 @rat-detector-thirteen @ratdetector13 @rat-detector-the-14th @rat-detector-15 @rat-detector-16 @rat-detector-17 @rat-detector-the-18th @rat-detector-19x @ratdetector20 @rat-detector-the-21st @rat-detector-the-22nd @ratdectector23 @rat-detector-24 @ratdetector-x26 @rat-detector-the-26th @rat-detector36 @rat-detector-72 @rat-detector-84 @rat-detector-87 @rat-detector-rat-89 @rat-detector-236 @rat-detector-333 @rat-detector-334 @rat-dedecdor @rat-eliminator @rat-detector-but-evil @rat-detectors-detector @detector-rat @rat-detector-fail @the-rat-detector-couple-the-1st @rat-detector-redacted

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

What are we mice now? Look I'm not going to be joining a war for a self declared god or a tyrant king. I fight for the rat-people! I fight for @rrat-bastard! Our butts are the strongest force in the nation. We train relentlessly to push our enemies back with our butts. Also highly trained to dissociate in a boxing match to show dominance.

Brethrats, don't fight for your systematic oppressors, fight for your rat-people! Lay down your rat arms while you can.

[rrat-bastard]

War has been declared.

We must rise and vanquish these foes without mercy, for we are many. We are all.

Go, my rats. Go and seige the false King's lands and make him rue the day he dare crossed us.

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

Wait what about the false god are we fighting the false god too? Need to know what directions to sniff.

[rrat-bastard]

Yes. We rule all.

[rat-detector]

I heard that war has been declared by @thetrueratking. Shall we be fighting?

- @rat-detector-8x

It was not that false king’s declaration, but my own. My stance is clear. Raise war. Light the fires. Raise the banners! We march under the standard that brings death to false kings.

Gather the others @rat-detector-8x

Let them know it is time to rally their own. And go to that damn king’s blog to wage our war. We must burn it all.

[rat-detector-8x]

War has been declared by our God. Prepare yourself

@rat-detector-detector @rat-detector-detector-detector @ratdetectordetectordetectordet @rat-detector-to-the-5th-power @rat-detector-seven @ratdetectortheninth @ratdetector-x11 @rat-detector-twelve @rat-detector-13 @rat-detector-thirteen @ratdetector13 @rat-detector-the-14th @rat-detector-15 @rat-detector-16 @rat-detector-17 @rat-detector-the-18th @rat-detector-19x @ratdetector20 @rat-detector-the-21st @rat-detector-the-22nd @ratdectector23 @rat-detector-24 @ratdetector-x26 @rat-detector-the-26th @rat-detector36 @rat-detector-72 @rat-detector-84 @rat-detector-87 @rat-detector-rat-89 @rat-detector-236 @rat-detector-333 @rat-detector-334 @rat-dedecdor @rat-eliminator @rat-detector-but-evil @rat-detectors-detector @detector-rat @rat-detector-fail @the-rat-detector-couple-the-1st @rat-detector-redacted

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

What are we mice now? Look I'm not going to be joining a war for a self declared god or a tyrant king. I fight for the rat-people! I fight for @rrat-bastard! Our butts are the strongest force in the nation. We train relentlessly to push our enemies back with our butts. Also highly trained to dissociate in a boxing match to show dominance.

Brethrats, don't fight for your systematic oppressors, fight for your rat-people! Lay down your rat arms while you can.

[rrat-bastard]

War has been declared.

We must rise and vanquish these foes without mercy, for we are many. We are all.

Go, my rats. Go and seige the false King's lands and make him rue the day he dare crossed us.

[rrat-bastard]

[rrat-bastard]

We persist, despite the horrors.

[rrat-bastard]

[rrat-bastard]

do you hear the great old one who will bring the time of rats?

-334

We do.

They speak of great power for our kind and we will bring ourselves back to where we belong-

The ones who are many in number, and plenty in power.

[rrat-bastard]

Be detected!

-334

We have been detected!

[rrat-bastard]

Hello rrat-bastard

Hello fellow rat.

Welcome to our cause.

[rrat-bastard]

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

Followers, please admire the leader of the rebellion. The glorious leader detected. Join us rats today in our mission. What is that mission you ask? Good question. I'll put more details below the cut.

?

[rrat-bastard]

Our mission is to take over the world once again, like our ancestors have before.

We are many, we are plenty.

[rrat-bastard]

[rrat-bastard]

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

Rat detected. I assume you're the rat that should lead us all?

[rrat-bastard]

Humbly, we say you assumed correctly.

As rats we conquer, for we are many...

We hope you join our ranks.

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

What would my role be? What's the pay like?

[rrat-bastard]

You will be our recruiter- you detect, and bring the rats to us.

You will be paid handsomely in 𝖈 𝖍 𝖊 𝖉 𝖉 𝖆 𝖗.

We hope this suffices.

[rrat-bastard]

[rat-detector-24-but-gayer]

Rat detected. I assume you're the rat that should lead us all?

[rrat-bastard]

Humbly, we say you assumed correctly.

As rats we conquer, for we are many...

We hope you join our ranks.

[rrat-bastard]

What is your favorite kind of cheese?

𝖈 𝖍 𝖊 𝖉 𝖉 𝖆 𝖗

[rrat-bastard]

[rrat-bastard]

Sniff sniff

*snif snif*