mariana reyes. despite his nature, part of him desired to say nothing to her, no actions to fill the void except his ceaseless glare and the weight of all the unsaid words hung over them both. he often remembers their final meeting, he certainly remembers having to discuss the awful things he’d said and vice versa with his therapist, but it never makes the thoughts cut any shallower. the fact remains ––– she’s been thrust out from the position she held in his life, his constant, and she now stands an unknown entity. a stranger. an enemy.
❛ it was my fault. ❜ and just like it always does, ronan’s soft, tender tone betrays his stoic, rugged looks. whilst he may seem like he wants for nothing more than her head on a pike, his caramel words paint an entirely different picture. tinged with sadness, a longing he could never quite shake off, he looks at mariana as he speaks, heart tugging towards her as if it had a single say. ❛ you okay ? i hit you kinda’ hard. ❜ he feels substantially guilty, still, for knocking her. he was a big guy and it could’ve, very realistically, left a bruise.
UNLIKE HIM, mariana had not spoken of their last encounter. nor did she plan to. talking about it made it that much more REAL. and if she was entirely honest, she DID NOT WANT it to be real. he had been her rock for such a large part of her life and he hadn’t even known it. in fact, the whole time he had thought she was saving him. when really, he kept her so leveled. so GROUNDED. so… SOFT. and now he didn’t. now she had blake. while it was entirely different, different people, different EMOTIONS and FEELINGS. they, in their own ways, were her support systems. as a best friend, it had been ronan. as much more than she cared to admit, it was blake. and while she had lost ronan, he hadn’t lost her. though, like many more things… he didn’t even know.
her head is shaking, denying him to be at fault. truthfully, they had both been at fault. ❝ no, it’s mine too.❞ her voice is as soft as it always had been, though louder so he could hear her over the music. his next words tug at her heart, features shifting for a split moment to surprise. though it was gone as soon as it crossed her doll like face. and instead, she gathered her composure. nodding. ❝ it’s really fine, i’m fine. ❞ oh, but she wasn’t. they weren’t and so she wasn’t.