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ā i donāt like you. i just⦠donāt want you to get hurt. thatās all. ā
ā stop being so kind to me. itās confusing. ā
ā why does it always feel different when itās you? ā
ā donāt pretend you donāt feel it too. ā
ā i hate that you understand me better than anyone else ever has. ā
ā we keep doing this ā arguing, pushing each other away ā and still⦠we end up right here. ā
ā i should walk away. i should hate you. but i donāt. ā
ā this isnāt supposed to matter. youāre not supposed to matter. ā
ā tell me to go. tell me you donāt want me. iāll believe you. ā
ā you werenāt supposed to mean anything. so why do you feel like everything? ā
ā if i let myself want you, iāll never be able to stop. ā
ā do you really hate me, or does it just hurt less than wanting me? ā
āyou ruin everything, you know that? including my ability to stay away from you.ā
ā say itās nothing. say it doesnāt keep you up at night, too. ā
ā if you kiss me right now, iām not going to be able to pretend anymore. ā
ā what are we even doing? we fight, we hurt each other, and then we end up like this. ā
ā i wish i didnāt care. i wish it didnāt tear me apart when you look at someone else like that. ā
ā i should hate you. but all i feel is this ache when youāre not around. ā
ā youāre the last person i should fall for. and the only one i want. ā
ā this was never supposed to happen. not with you. ā
ā i donāt want to want you. but you keep making it impossible. ā
ā i canāt lose you. not when i finally figured out what you really mean to me. ā
ā you make me feel everything iāve spent years trying to shut down. ā
ā is this still hate? because it doesnāt feel like it anymore. ā
ā you drive me insane⦠and iād still rather be near you than anyone else. ā
ā i know weāre supposed to be on opposite sides, but i canāt stop thinking about you. ā
ā iāve tried to forget you. god knows iāve tried. ā
ā say you donāt care. lie to me. maybe iāll believe it this time. ā
ā when did you start looking at me like that? ā
ā maybe if weād met under different circumstances, this wouldnāt hurt so much. ā
ā i kept telling myself it was just tension. just adrenaline. but itās not, is it? ā
ā you broke something open in me. and now i donāt know how to close it again. ā
ā iām not supposed to love you. iām not supposed to want this. ā
ā for someone iām supposed to hate, you make me feel way too much. ā
ā just tell me it didnāt mean anything to you. say it to my face. ā
āi wanted to hate you. but you saw me, and now i donāt know how to forget that.ā
ā we canāt do this. so why does it feel like we already are? ā