thinking about the life that was stolen from her.

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@ryuhour
thinking about the life that was stolen from her.
figured i would post this here too….. Love this dialogue so much. Top 1 transgender protagonists
WOOOF WOOF BARK BArK BARK BARK
long time no see..
HHI GUYS IM SOO SORRYY I HAVEBT BEEN WRITING
hello my brethren i have watched squid game season 2
teehee ur acc is so cute
OHMY GOSH?? AHH THANK YOU ur one of my two favorite writers i feel so special
can someone please, PLEASE, write Hyun-ju fic where reader is so pretty, like a literally everybody’s dream girl and Hyun-ju thought she’s not enough for her but then reader confess her love to Hyun-ju by saying “why can’t you want me like the other boys do? they stare at me while i stare at you” please? like i listen to that song and this specific lyrics make me think of her immediately
Fully inspired by everyone on TikTok doing this trend so did one but of Hyunju and your goofy ahh so enjoy this portrait I made of you :3

guysies .. send in hyunju reader requests plz..
HI MY POOKIE OKIE SUPER DOOKIE
since my now #1 writer is doing requests, can i please ask for hyun-ju with a reader who hypes her up to wear a skirt/dress (or anything feminine, really!)
I am so bad at requesting so feel free to ignore this if you want 😭🙏
a/n: OH MY GOODNESS … UR #1 WRITER???1? AHHH ILY❤️❤️❤️ i couldn’t tell if the reader was encouraging hyunju or if hyunju was encouraging the reader but I hope this is right :((
trust me? | cho hyunju x reader
sum: you (the reader!) hype your girlfriend (hyunju!!) up into wearing feminine stuff ^_^
warnings: none! aside from mentions of a poor self image and transphobia
gen: fluff :3 (with a tiinyy dash of angst)
Of all the girls to embrace their femininity, Hyun-ju stuck out the most. No matter where she went, she stuck out like a sore thumb, like a large splotch of bright white on a dark, dark canvas. God, did she hate the way others looked at her, their eyes anything but kind. They were ridden with distaste and judgement, with whys and ews and ughs because who did this man think he was pretending to be a woman? Who did this man think he was pretending to be something he wasn’t?
Maybe they were right, she couldn’t help but think at times.
You, on the other hand, had never worried about such things. Right now, you were shimmying a shirt over your torso, your girlfriend by your side(after so long, changing in front of each other was far from weird now). She eyed you while searching for clothes of her own, her smile as full of twinkles as it’d always been, her lips red with carefully applied lipstick. “ You look good. “ She idly hummed as she rummaged through your shared closet. Her voice was melodic and pleasant to your ears, prodding at the edges of your lips, threatening to curl up.
“ Thank you~ “ You practically purred, tip-toeing to press the softest of kisses to her cheek. (You could smell your own scent on her - she’d taken a liking to your body spray some time ago, and after so many days of you offering it to her, she eventually just started using it without question or word. You didn’t mind, you never had nor would you ever. If anything, it smelled sweeter on her.)
She gave a giggle - it was short and ended almost as soon as it started. It was a pattern, you’d recognized - how Hyun-ju would cut off her laughs or snickers or chuckles before they became long enough to focus on. Hyun-ju didn’t like her voice much, to put it straight - she thought it was too deep, too manly. (To you, it was the most beautiful sound you’d ever heard.) If only she would see herself more for what she was.
Even after so much time, Hyun-ju still struggled - and now she was quietly eyeing a skirt that was draped oddly over a hanger. She looked like she was itching to grab it, but … something, only god knows what, was coiling around her hand and pulling, pulling, pulling whenever her fingers inched too close to the article of clothing that you knew would look absolutely divine on her.
“ .. If you wanna wear it, then wear it. “ You eventually spoke up, smiling to yourself (yet also to your girlfriend). “ I was waiting to grow into it, it’s too big for me - maybe it’ll fit you, love. “ You said as you pulled a newly chosen pair of pants up your legs and over your hips. Hyun-ju just kept looking and looking and looking - and then she finally reached out for it, curling her fingers around the edges of the skirt and pulling it off the hanger.
“ I think you’ll look really good in it, “ You soon added in a further attempt of persuasion, leaning against her once you’d gotten your outfit in check - but when your body pressed against hers, you could feel precisely how tense her muscles were, and perhaps this was slightly more serious than you’d originally thought it was.
“ .. Are you okay? “ You stood up straighter, trying to meet her eyes - but she kept staring daggers into the skirt, conflicted. You could only wonder what she was thinking about. “ You don’t have to if you don’t wanna. “
“ I want to, “ Hyun-ju finally breathed out. “ I … don’t think I’ll look good in it, is all. “ She finally fessed up. So that’s what it was? “ What???!! That’s crazy. You’re crazy. “ You shook your head, taking the skirt from her hands and crouching to press it to her waist, as if examining how it’d look. “ It looks really good already like this - so imagine how good it’ll be when you actually put it on? “
Hyun-ju flushed, but still seemed a bit unconvinced. “ .. I don’t know. It’ll show my legs. “
“ What’s wrong with that? “
“ Everything. “
And so you thought, and thought, and thought. Hyun-ju clearly really wanted to do this, but her insecurities were often unrelenting.
“ I have leggings somewhere here! Would that make you feel better? “
“ …. maybe. “
With that, you went to scour your wardrobe for the forementioned leggings - once you found them (which took maybe 5 whole minutes…) you beckoned her to the bed and urged her to sit down, taking the liberty of pulling the nylon over her legs.
After all was set, you guided the skirt over her hips and stepped back to look over your work. Hyun-ju looked a bit uncertain, rubbing her thumbs over each other.
“ Is it .. pretty? “
“ The prettiest. “
Hyun-ju picked at the fabrics of the skirt with an unsure hum. “ I’m not so sure. “ You dropped down on the bed next to her, leaning all your weight against her. “ You look amazing!! Other girls would kill to look this good in skirts, “ You playfully poked her stomach. “ I bet people will look at you and be like .. wow, that girl looks so cool in that skirt.. “ Hyun-ju just giggled - it was a full one this time, and you smiled a bit wider than usual.
“ Okay, okay, “ She shook her head with a little grin, standing up. “ Come on Ju!!!! “ You grabbed her hand, lacing your fingers with hers. “ You look really beautiful. It suits you. Trust me? “
Hyun-ju gave an amused sigh. “ For sure. “
AHHHH IM SOO SORRY THIS IS SO BAD idont proof read my stuff and im a certified yapper both in regular convo + in writing.. i hope i didnt branch off too much or bore you :(( im sorry it took so long too .. i hope it serves ur request at least a little bit justice, ur my first one ever hehe
nvm fave writer ever liked it so part 2 will be coming i fear
ok NO part two im not built to be a writer I fear
she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
hyunju with gyeongseok means she gets to live the life she’s always wanted. nayeon loves her so much that she cries and cries, throwing her strawberry beanie with inordinate strength for a toddler the first time she meets hyunju and they have to part ways. gyeongseok is an incredible cook, and ridiculously fast at that (it comes with working two jobs and the endless checkups for nayeon), so even as she protests to please have the kitchen, her househusband takes over. he’s a bit older, not hardened by life as she is but nonetheless made rough around the edges by struggle. despite (or maybe because of) their sharp edges and shared pains, they make a beautiful pair. when nayeon calls her “mom” for the first time, hyunju is the one to cry.
hyunju with youngmi means they are two halves of a whole, two pieces perfectly and inexplicably broken down the center. she sees herself in the younger woman, projected in youngmi’s dark, pleading eyes. youngmi is nervous, seemingly unsure of everything, and yet her presence strengthens hyunju like nothing else. the two women have made a tradition of Sunday brunches in fancy cafes, splurging (responsibly, of course) with the money they have left from the games. youngmi isn’t one for fashion, but she delights in dressing hyunju up, in exclaiming to her sillim-dong friends of how utterly beautiful her girlfriend is. there’s always a little gift or trinket waiting on hyunju’s desk when she returns home, accompanied by a tight hug. they become two branches grafted together, into a beautiful rosebush steady with thorns.
hyunju with daeho means she mends him and he mends her. daeho, with his tendency to flinch at any sudden noise and cup his shaking hands over his ears in an instant. hyunju, with her tendency to curl into herself when looked at for too long, always afraid of what those glares could mean. nonetheless, daeho looks at her with equal parts eagerness and tenderness bursting at the seams, and treats her the same. when she meets daeho’s sisters, his eldest pulls her aside for a moment. “if he doesn’t propose to you within two years, i’ll grab him by the scruff and toss him like a gonggi stone. just let me know”. hyunju laughs. he makes the deadline, in the end.
(part 1?) stay is a four letter word | cho hyunju x kim-youngmi
sum: in which youngmi lives, but almost did she not
warnings: none?? angst??
gen: angst, but hurtcomfort ^.^
a/n: trying my hand at this … this would be the first time i write any existing characters alone, so bear with me .. im definitely not the best at this (also never posted on tumblr before … expect awful layouts)
.ᐟ
If Hyunju could decipher anything, it’d be the blood rushing to her head - a pulse thudded in her temples, unrelenting and loud. For a moment, her world swayed and oscillated, and she would’ve rubbed her eyes had she been in any better state of mind, had her hand been anywhere but in Youngmi’s hand.
She gripped and she squeezed and she pulled. The skin where her fingers met Youngmi’s was warm (albeit sweaty) — until it wasn’t. As Hyunju stumbled into the room and pushed everyone else in, her palm was empty and her fingers searched for something that wasn’t there but should’ve been there.
The clock ticking down to their possible death was loud, a fitting addition to the pound, pound, pounding in her head. “ .. Youngmi? “ She dared to rasp when she searched for the girl’s face, for those big, brown doe eyes only to be met with the horrified expressions of the rest of her team.
And so, she swung her head around to the door. There were people running and screaming and pushing, desperate to see another day.
(She’d comment on their greed, on how if they’d simply chosen the better choice, they wouldn’t be sobbing for life - but she’d be hypocritical, a blue Velcro circle stuck to the side of her chest like a trophy. It sat where her heart should be, and she thought it fit - her heart must be rather cold to draw her fingers to that button, to direct her eyes to meet Youngmi’s from the other side of the room. The wrong side of the room. Her heart must be far, far from warm to betray her promises. )
Hunched on the floor was her missing girl. Her hair was messy, bordering on matted. Sweaty bangs stuck to her forehead (on which Hyunju’s lips fit perfectly against) and her eyes were wide. Hyunju had always loved Youngmi’s eyes - but not like this. Youngmi’s eyes were big and bright, holding galaxies in the tawny of her irises. Right now, they harbored something more akin to a dying star.
“ Youngmi!!— “ Hyunju nothing but screamed. 3. She lurched forward for the fallen girl, who staggered up only to fall again. 2. There was a hand around her arm. 1. She was in the room again, a man that didn’t belong replacing Youngmi. Her Youngmi. Her Youngmi that was supposed to be in here with them, but she wasn’t. By the time Hyunju had processed it all, there were gunshots. They were piercing and loud and scary and cruel, and Hyunju forced herself up and to the square slot in the center of the door, pushing her face against it, looking for any sign of Youngmi.
All she could see was blood, red pooling on the floor as the guards stored away corpses into boxes and heaved them off like they were nothing. She couldn’t see Youngmi.
She must be in another room. (Realistically, there was no way she was alive. Hyunju’s stomach sunk as it settled in.)
AGHH im so sorry that’s it for now ,,, it’s WAY too late at night and I wanted to get in something just in case this ended up an unfinished project. I have more of this saved in my notes so if this does well and people want more then the second part should be up soon.^_^ gootnite