like a virgin

NAME: Ryker Troy Parrish. AGE: 24 POSITION: Deputy STATUS: Single why does this matter again? NOTES: N/A

[penelopecabello-blog]

YOU NEED TO FACE THE TRUTH.

[ryykerparrish]

DON’T YOU HAVE A JOB TO BE DOING?

[penelopecabello-blog]

Ryker I was at your house an hour ago, I saw it happen!

[ryykerparrish]

STOP CRUSHING MY DREAMS!

[penelopecabello-blog]

He claws you every time you hold him!

[ryykerparrish]

Not anymore!

[penelopecabello-blog]

You didn’t even want your cat!

[ryykerparrish]

We’ve bonded!

[penelopecabello-blog]

Ryker, the concept is amazing, but the theme itself? For a strip club? It just doesn’t work.

[ryykerparrish]

My cat thought it was a good idea, so fuck you.

[penelopecabello-blog]

Because you usually come up with amazing themes! But this? Ryker, I didn’t think you could stoop so low.

[ryykerparrish]

....I thought it was cool.

[penelopecabello-blog]

———- You’re not allowed to choose a theme night ever again.

[ryykerparrish]

What are you talking about? You love my themes!

[marilynbanks]

You had a crush on Ariel when she was seventeen. And you’re six years older than her. That’s a lot more than the two year age difference between me and Tatum. You’re deplorable.

I’m hoping they do. I have something I need to say to them.

[ryykerparrish]

Not pulling punches today, I see.

Marilyn----

[marilynbanks]

Why? Too old for you, cradle robber?

I don’t have anything to say to you. As long as they don’t come near Birdie, I don’t want to talk about it.

[ryykerparrish]

Thalia’s older than you are! And you’re dating Tatum!

And if they come near you?

[marilynbanks]

                Touch me, and I’ll break your jaw.

What the fuck do you want, Ryker?

[ryykerparrish]

You’re really not my type. But noted.

Do I really need to answer that?

[marilynbanks]

( she glances up, eyed rimmed red, unsurprised to see ryker. of course someone called him. her parents are wanted. ) You didn’t help me build shit.

Get out.

[ryykerparrish]

No, but I can definitely take credit.

No. We kind of need to talk about this.

[ryykerparrish]

              Why do you have to burn every bridge I help you build?

[ryykerparrish]

arielroryhayes:

I won’t.

        Well thank you. Some people thought I wouldn’t be a good parent due to my age, but they don’t realize that I’ve wanted to be a mom since I was little.

You’re pouting.

        If you think about it, Percy and Lily are to our siblings as Loki and Thalia are to us.

Much obliged.

      Age ain’t nothing but a number, Hayes.

I am not! 

        Oh, God. Why are you right?

[ryykerparrish]

arielroryhayes:

I hope you’re right.

      You really mean that?

I wasn’t trying to, love bug.

       We all need a bit of corruption now and then.

Have I ever been wrong? --Don’t answer that.

        Of course I do.

Ugh.

      Yeah, I guess we do.

[ryykerparrish]

arielroryhayes:

Right. You’re absolutely right. He’s just a baby still. I just hate how quickly he’s growing up.

             He deserves the world, and I intend to give him as much.

But it’s cute!

             They’re delightful, they just have a few bad habits.

He’s still your baby. That won’t change.

       I knew you’d be an amazing mother.

Ariel, you’re not helping me!

     Including, but not limited to, corrupting our siblings.

[ryykerparrish]

arielroryhayes:

But he’s almost one. Soon enough he’ll be in kindergarten, and the next thing I know, he’ll be graduating high school and filling out college applications. It’s completely terrifying.

      We’re having the best first birthday party money can buy. Only the best for my little one.

You’re never going to win this, Ry. But you two are incredibly adorable, so it’s okay.

         It’s just a phase!

Darling, I think you’re reaching, there. You have a few years before he even starts kindergarten. You have time. Breathe.

               Somehow, I’m not surprised.

Don’t encourage this!

             Lily Fabray-Berry and Percy Darling are not a phase. They’re menaces, and they’ve corrupted our siblings.

[ryykerparrish]

arielroryhayes:

Better be. That’s my baby you’re talking about, Parrish.

   Yeah, on November fifth.

You really just can’t say no to her, can you?

        Watch it, Ry, one of those criminal friends happens to be my baby sister.

He isn’t even one yet, Ari. I think you have a bit of time before you have to be worrying about college.

    Are you celebrating?

I’m trying really hard.

            Oh, you know they’re criminals!