Wei WuXian's Stolen Kiss - Analysing His Emotional Response
The stolen kiss scene has so many underlying feelings in such a short amount of paragraphs - it absolutely fascinates me. It's already quite an intense scene, but under the surface with the added subtext, it is a masterpiece of writing that provokes so much more emotion than first meets the eye.
Chapter 69
Wei WuXian’s back smashed against the tree. Just as his right hand was about to pull off the ribbon, his wrist was twisted back. The force was quite strong; he couldn’t even struggle out of it, but there was still no killing intent. Wei WuXian’s left sleeve shifted. As he was about to shake out the talismans, the person noticed his intent and caught him like before. They pressed both of his hands onto the tree, movements stiff. Wei WuXian raised his leg and was about to kick when he felt a warmth on his lips. He immediately froze. The touch felt both strange and unfamiliar, moist and warm. In the beginning, Wei WuXian couldn’t even understand what was going on. His mind went entirely blank. When he finally realized, he was shocked. This person, holding his wrists back, was pressing him onto the tree and kissing him.
Initially WWX doesn't give the person a gender. He doesn't even assume anything once he realises he's actually being kissed. This is quite interesting, because it shows he is at least subconsciously open to the mystery kisser being a man. We can tell the kiss is a new sensation to him, because the feeling is strange and unfamiliar to him. As such we can assume he's never kissed anyone before - which is confirmed later in the chapter.
He suddenly struggled, wanting to fight out of it and pull away the ribbon, but he failed. He wanted to move again, but he somehow stopped himself. The person kissing him seemed to be shaking softly. Wei WuXian couldn’t struggle anymore. He thought to himself, it seems that even if the maiden is quite strong, her personality is both fearful and easily embarrassed? She’s already so nervous. Or else, she wouldn't have chosen to sneak up to him at such a time. She probably mustered up all of the courage she could find inside of her. Besides, it seemed that her cultivation wasn’t low, meaning that her self-esteem was even higher. If he pulled off the ribbon and accidentally saw her, how ashamed would the maiden feel?
The two sets of thin lips turned from side to side, careful yet inseparable. Wei WuXian hadn’t even decided what to do when the soft lips suddenly became aggressive. Wei WuXian’s teeth weren’t clenched, allowing the other to intrude inside. He was suddenly powerless. He felt that it was a bit difficult to breathe, wanting to turn his head away, but the other person squeezed his face and turned it back. Between the swirls of the lips and the tongues, he felt dizzy as well, until the other finally bit down on his lower lip. After a moment of lingering, the lips finally left reluctantly, and he finally managed to recover.
Looking at the scene we can see WWX's thought process quite clearly. But if you read the text carefully, you can see WWX coming close to realising it might not be a woman on a few occasions.
Firstly, WWX is pinned to the tree - he's strong and can hold his own again most, but this person is able to restrict his movements. Now I'm not saying girls are weaker or anything like that! But, in this novel it does seem that the men are stronger and more prominent in the cultivation world. Apparently there are female cultivators in (all of?) the Sects, but we never really hear of many - at least not in the sense you hear of the men in the novel anyway. Yes, there are a few women mentioned in the novel, but most of them are nowhere near as powerful as the men. In fact, there's definitely a bit of sexism throughout the novel. Wen Qing is formidable, and Madam Yu is a woman with an extremely volatile temper who resorts to physical abuse. But overall, overly strong women aren't mentioned very often at all. We later find out MianMian has become a cultivator - but the attitude the male cultivators have towards her just sums up the general attitude towards women in the novel. Anyway, I'm just trying to prove there doesn't seem to be a load of extremely strong women in the cultivation world as far as we can tell. So the fact the person is strong enough to stop WWX from moving should make it very apparent to him that it's a man, and a strong man at that.
Just before he gives the mystery kisser a gender, he notices they are shaking softly - which is when he stops fighting, because he's too kind to upset someone who is obviously scared and embarrassed by what they are doing. He's just so empathetic, it's very sweet. It's very interesting he doesn't give the person a gender until he notices they are shaking. He automatically attributes this emotional response as feminine in nature, because he has been taught gender stereotypes from a young age. This is evident in his interactions with others, as he puts on a very generic portrail of masculinity when with JC and the others. He is a lot more of a 'lad' around them - swearing, fighting, hunting, gambling, being charming to girls and reading/sharing pornographic books. But he is in truth mostly a very sweet and sensitive romantic who guarded his kiss waiting for his 'one' - the total opposite of what he portrays around other men. Except LWJ that is. WWX does show his sweet side to him at times - before catching himself doing so and covering it up with teasing.
So WWX automatically assumes that it must be a woman kissing him after the emotional response - even though they've managed to overpower him. Of course, as I've previously stated the heteronormative society he grew up in plays a part in his thought process also. But, his subconscious can't help but pick up on things that just don't fit his assumptions that it is a woman.
It's quite amusing to read his description of the 'maiden' because he practically describes LWJ! The person is very strong, easily embarrassed (LWJ does show signs of being embarrassed when WWX flirts with him or teases him on many occasions), has a high level of cultivation and an even higher self-esteem - Hello LWJ!
He goes on to describe both their lips being thin. Before anyone goes off on a rant about lip thickness and gender, I'm just generalising because to most people 'thin lips' are somewhat considered masculine. In this novel at least, thin lips are only ever used to describe those of a man. MXTX aways writes everything with a purpose, so to me it seems like this was something WWX noticed as well. Throughout the kiss scene WWXs thoughts flip between what he is feeling and what he has observed, contradicting each other on a subconscious level. Somewhere deep inside he is questioning if this is a man on a woman, but because of his upbringing, he squashes his observations down and goes against his reasoning. His face is even gripped and forced back into a kiss, with a strong hand - which also means the person is managing to pin him to the tree with one hand. That's some strength, considering WWX isn't exactly a weakling!
WWX tries to analyse what is happening as he is being kissed. As WWX has demonstrated so many times throughout the novel already, he's very astute. Yes, you could argue he's not about his sexuality or his feelings for LWJ, but as I've said before, this is down to the heteronormative exposure which was embedded into him from his childhood and the denial he uses to protect himself. After all, he thinks LWJ is straight and even tries to reassure him on many occasions that he 'doesn't like men' and he 'wasn't flirting with' him, but this is only after he has been rebuffed by LWJ or WWX thinks he finds it unappealing.
The lip bite. Was this a subconscious/subliminal message to WWX on LWJs behalf? We know he has bitten WWX once before, when they were trapped in the cave of the Xuanwu together. Granted that was out of frustration and this time it is more out of utter lust. But it is something WWX might have picked up on subconsciously? LWJ is almost signing the kiss off without realising. I've said before MXTX does everything with a purpose.. so it's not too much of a stretch in my opinion. I think this is her starting to draw parallels between the two events, to show that there is a sense of déjà vu here for WWX.
From the kiss, Wei WuXian’s entire body felt limp. Energy came into his arms only after he leaned against the tree for some more time. Raising his hand, he ripped the ribbon away only to be stung by the glare of the sudden sunlight. He finally managed to open his eyes, but nothing was around him. Bushes, trees, grasses, vines — no second person. Wei WuXian was still somewhat confused. He sat on the branch for a while longer. When he jumped off, he felt weakness under his legs, almost light-headed. He supported himself on the tree trunk at once, cursing at how useless he was in silence. He had been kissed so hard that his legs were giving out. Looking up, he glanced around the area, but there was no trace of another person. The previous scene seemed to be an absurd yet erotic daydream. Wei WuXian couldn’t help but think of the legends of those mountain creatures. But he was certain that it wasn’t some mountain creature. It had to be a person.
Again, he has reverted back to using the term 'person' - no longer gender specific. This is because he's once again questioning if it was a man. We can see he is questioning if it was indeed a woman after the kiss because he very clearly starts to think about the apparent 'legends of the mountain creatures' - because whoever kissed him was incredibly strong for a woman and he won't fully allow himself to think it is a man due to his upbringing. This part would be quite an emotional read, if it wasn't for the fact it's quite hilarious to think of WWX thinking he's just been snogged by some lusty beast.
*If someone doesn't draw some fan art on this I'm going to be so sad 😂
Recalling what it had felt like, formless tickles crawled up all the way to the tip of his heart. Wei WuXian touched his chest with his right hand, but found that the flower that had been there was gone. He searched the ground for a while. It wasn’t there either. It couldn’t have disappeared out of thin air, could it?
Here is another parallel between their time in the cave and the above scene. WWX notices the flower is missing. Just like when he realised the perfume pouch was missing after they were rescued from the cave. There is no real reason to have this in the above chapter, unless it was for a purpose. MXTX is mirroring the events in the cave for a reason. We all know that LWJ is an adorably jealous klepto and the flower being taken is another thing niggling at the back of WWXs mind now also.
Wei WuXian remained paused for a long while. He touched his lips unconsciously, finally managing to say a while later, “How could this be… This was my…”
He didn’t see anyone even after he looked around the area. Wei WuXian didn’t know whether to laugh or worry. He knew that the person was most likely hiding from him and wouldn't appear again, so he could only give up on searching. He began to walk randomly around the forest. After a while, he heard a loud noise from in front of him. As Wei WuXian looked up, he saw a slender figure clothed in white. Whom could it be but Lan WangJi? Yet, although he clearly was Lan WangJi, what he did didn’t seem like what Lan WangJi would do at all. When Wei WuXian saw him, he thrust his fist into a tree, with such force that the tree snapped in half. Wei WuXian found it strange, “Lan Zhan! What are you doing?” The person spun around. It was Lan WangJi after all. However, right now, his eyes were bloodshot, his expression almost frightening. Wei WuXian was startled, “Wow, so scary.” Lan WangJi’s voice was harsh, “Go!” Wei WuXian, “I just came here and you want me to go. Do you really hate me that much?” Lan WangJi, “Stay away from me!”
Except for the couple of days spent in the cave of the Xuanwu, this was the first time that Wei WuXian had seen Lan WangJi lose his composure so badly. But back then, the situation was special, and it was still understandable. Right now, everything’s well, so why would he be like this? Wei WuXian walked a step backward, 'staying away' from him.
Just after the kiss, WWX sat down on the tree for a while, he went looking for his mystery kisser and then wandered around for some time - from the sounds of it, quite a long time has passed. When WWX finally bumps into LWJ, he is in quite a state. LWJ seems to be averting his gaze from WWX, because he is utterly beside himself for what he has just done. He has glanced at him, but not made full eye contact. He feels guilty and annoyed at himself for giving in to his desires. WWX immediately draws parallels between LWJ's current temper and the time he got annoyed in the cave of the Xuanwu - when he bit him. So we can clearly see that this memory has definitely been evoked within him. WWX even takes a step back away from him, just after remembering how LWJ reacted in the cave and in response to his request - which he doesn't normally do to be honest! As he is recalling what happened in the cave when LWJ lost his composure, the bite he received because of this has most likely come to the forefront of his mind also.
He continued to ask, “Hey, Lan Zhan, what’s wrong? Are you okay? If you’re not okay then say you’re not okay, yeah?” Lan WangJi didn’t look him in the eye. He unsheathed Bichen. A few rays of blue light slashed across the trees around the area. They collapsed a moment later. He stood still for a while, clenching his sword. His grip was tight, exerting so much strength that his knuckles grew white. As though he had somewhat calmed down, he suddenly looked over again, his gaze pinning Wei WuXian. Wei WuXian felt a strange, unexplainable sensation. His eyes had been covered by the ribbon for over two hours. The sunlight was still a bit too dazzling for him. After he took off the ribbon, his eyes keep on tearing up. His lips were somewhat swollen as well. Wei WuXian felt that what he looked like right now must be terrible. Being stared at so hard, he couldn’t help but touched his chin, “Lan Zhan?” “…” Lan WangJi, “Nothing.” With a clang, the sword was unsheathed. Lan WangJi turned around to walk away. Wei WuXian still found that something was wrong with him. After he thought about it, just in case, he followed him, lunging in attempt to feel his pulse. Lan WangJi dodged to the side and looked at him coldly.
Eventually once LWJ has managed to calm down and regain his composure (RIP trees), he finally looks at WWX properly. According to the text, his gaze pinned WWX. The use of the word 'pinning' is very interesting. LWJs gaze pinning WWX, echos the previous scene where WWX was pinned to the tree and had his first kiss stolen. So now he's being reminded of the kiss from just before and the bite from the cave simultaneously. It's no accident this is the feeling he receives from LWJ's gaze. We all know WWX loves LWJ's attention, especially when he looks at him. He's just been somewhat aroused by a kiss and now he's being gazed at by the object of his subconscious affections. There's a lot of emotions for WWX to unpack here! Which is why the next sentence is very interesting. He states he feels a strange, unexplainable sensation. From the above, we can gather it's a mixture of possible remnants of arousal from the kiss and his desire for LWJ bubbling to the surface. There is also the possibility he might momentarily be close to working out it was LWJ who kissed him on a subconscious level - due to the parallels between both encounters.
The next few sentences really affected me when I read them. We already know what WWX is like at making excuses to himself about his feelings. It's a coping mechanism for him for so many different things, but mostly to protect himself and his heart from emotions he doesn't understand or feel comfortable acknowledging. Which is why, when he so obviously starts to get emotional and tear up, he makes the excuse it's because he's had the ribbon over his eyes for a while. This is true, he did have them covered for a few hours apparently, but it's been quite a while since he took the ribbon off. He is just using the above as an excuse - it's the old 'I've got something in my eye' line. He has just felt an unexplainable sensation due to LWJ's gaze and has begun to cry. This could be interpreted in two ways I think - or possibly a combination of them both, which I actually think is more likely. The first reason he might be feeling emotional is because he's just lost his first kiss. WWX is a true romantic at heart. He's been saving his kiss for for 20 years. He's never had the desire to kiss anyone - all the girls he's apparently 'flirted' with, not one of them peaked his interest enough for him to give them a kiss. This is quite an emotional thing to happen to someone, especially if he's been keeping it for his 'one'. Yes, he was aroused. Yes, he did enjoy it. But it's still emotional for him.
The second reason he might be emotional is because, he's subconsciously drawing parallels between being pinned to the tree and being pinned by LWJs gaze - both conjuring up this strange emotion. This is possibly a mixture of; desire, longing, arousal or something along those lines towards LWJ. A pinning gaze is quite sexy, it's penetrative, it's predatory. It's definitely stirring something up within him that he's just not ready to accept or cope with at that moment.
That said, it could even be semi-conscious sadness that it wasn't LWJ who kissed him. WWX refuses to elaborate on this feeling, because he just can't comprehend them. So it seems quite plausible it's a mixture of the two reasons above. Instead of accepting his feelings for LWJ and the fact he's lost his first kiss - he begins to cry. Whatever the reason was, it was WWXs reaction to LWJs gaze that caused all of these emotions to rush forward.
The fact he suddenly worries what he must look like in front of LWJ, shows just how much he cares what LWJ thinks of him. He is worried he looks undesirable, with weepy eyes and swollen red lips. Which also connects to the above emotional response he is likely feeling. In the end he is distracted by LWJ leaving abruptly and his concern that there is something wrong with him, pulls WWX away from these strong emotions.
It's quite evident WWX had a sort of sexual awakening from the mixture of complex emotions he has just experienced seeing LWJ. Especially after seeing him in such a raw, angry state - which we later find out WWX gets a sexual kick from! If LWJ had stared at him a little longer, perhaps WWX might have accepted his feelings a little more at this point - or even acted upon them.
