Maybe a date? || Tuah & Sahid
Tuah smiled apologetically. “You have a young face,” he reasoned. That and coupled with Sahid’s thin frame made them looked like they were no older than twenty by his estimation. “Do you not like being told that you look younger?” He arched his brows, “most people seem to like it when they’re told that they look younger. Makes them friendlier, even.” Tuah moved his shoulders in a shrug. He supposed Sahid didn’t take it as a compliment as some might, which made Tuah guess that they didn’t care much about their appearance. “That’s quite an accomplishment,” he commented, “very responsible too. It must’ve taken a lot from you to get everyone ready.” Tuah smiled at the image. “Did they protest whenever you try to make them attend the church?”
He scoffed. “Then you might have to wait for the rest of your life.” Tuah nudged Sahid’s side gently with his elbow, chuckling as he shook his head. “Someone once told me that I have a personality as bland as the colour beige. And if that didn’t allude you to how boring I am, I don’t know what is.” Of course, he didn’t agree with the statement, but it worked in this context. Perhaps people would be interested in his based on his looks, since he did take care of his appearance, but he was sure they would lose interest after five minutes talking to him. Or was that the point of the application, he wondered. Tuah narrowed his eyes and arched his brow at the off-hand comment, his lips curled into a half smile. “Ah, so your mother set you up with the nicest boys and girls in Wheeler, then?” He asked, a teasing lilt in his voice.
He nodded in understanding. “Talking about the things that hurt you is never easy.” He should know, since he had always avoided talking about his past with his sire. Centuries had passed and it was still a sore subject for him. Tuah could only imagine what it would be like for Sahid. “Talking about it may help ease the pain, however. You don’t have to talk to me about it if you don’t want to. But, perhaps with someone that you trust? Or with a professional?” Of course, he was willing to listen to them if Sahid wanted him to, but he’d still wanted them to realise that there were other options too for them to heal themselves, both physically and mentally.
Tuah tilted his head a little to the side, humming as he mulled Sahid’s question. “There’s nothing specific, but I do try to celebrate every festivity whenever I can. I fast during Ramadhan and celebrate Eid al-Fitr in the month of Syawal in respect of Islamic beliefs, and celebrate Christmas in respect of Christianity, for example.” There were other observation or celebration that he had participated, but those three were the ones he participated the most. They were both Abrahamic religions, and the ones that he was most familiar with. “If you’re talking about tradition, however, that’s a different story. I still follow old Malay traditions wherever I go. Some of them are a little outdated, but I always find myself reverting to my old ways.” Perhaps it was his way to reconnect to his past before everything spiralled uncontrollably out of his hands.
He nodded in understanding. It wasn’t the first time he heard someone trying to reconnect with their past through religion, through culture. From Sahid’s story, Tuah guessed that Sahid felt robbed of their own identity when their mother refused to talk about their past, so they were trying to find a way to reconnect with it again. To find their roots in their father’s religion, so to speak. “Do you start performing puja at home too? In Astoria, I mean.”
He nodded. “To your three months in Astoria, and to many more to come,” he raised his hand pretending to give a toast, before letting it fall to his thigh with a light slap. Tuah arched his brows, his lips painted a half smile when Sahid offered to celebrate his birthday. “A private birthday party with just the two of us?” he entertained the idea with a hum. It wasn’t what Sahid was offering, merely his own assumption of what the party would be. “So, it’ll be not so much of a party but, a hang out, yes? That doesn’t sound too bad.” He never liked being in a crowd, anyway, especially when he was the centre of the attention. “We can do that too for your birthday. Go around town to do anything you want to do. Just the two of us.”
Sahid shrugged with a grin. “When you’re young you want to be older, I guess,” they said. Older meant being able to live on your own, older meant making your own decisions. Sahid had only ever wanted to be older. “I feel like it is close to saying I look like a kid, I guess,” they said, but there was still a smile on their face. They wondered what made them look younger, they could sort of guess, they didn’t have a very bulky appearance, not at all.
“Not a whole lot, they were meek little sleep after too much booze. It was just the ‘presentable’ part that left a lot to be desired. You can dress up a cat in a suit, but it will still be a cat. You can dress up five hungover friends in suits, but they’ll still be hungover,” Sahid told with a smile. It was the one time in their life that they had felt most in control.
They shook their head. “I didn’t make them, technically I saved them, because if they didn’t show up, society would’ve judged them harshly,” they said with a wink. Sahid scoffed in return, although they weren’t sure if Tuah had scoffed, but they had figured from the movement. “Just my life? Worth it if I get to say it,” they noted, cocking an eyebrow. “Who was that and who hurt them?” Sahid said, eyebrows knitted together, so far to them Tuah was the opposite of being as bland as the color beige. They’d had decent conversations so far and he seemed to have a lot to share that was all very much new information to Sahid. Also he was a Vampire, which had to count for something. There must be stories to tell if you lived over three centuries. And that really wasn’t the point of Grindr was it? Tuah would get the attention just for his looks. Sahid shrugged, surprised to hear Tuah say ‘boys and girls’ when it came to their mother. There hadn’t been many situations where they had been matched with some girl from town, but there had been instances where they received a pointed jab whenever they spent a little too long watching the boys play soccer without shirts on. For a moment Sahid wasn’t sure if they should make a comment on that. Because they wondered how it would sound. “Just the girls,’ they said, the words falling from their tongue, sounding defensive. Years of ignoring their own wishes trained into the simple act. Boys, no sir, men shouldn’t love other men. They awkwardly looked away, not sure how to be themselves.
Sahid really couldn’t shake the feeling, the idea of talking about it was scary, but not for the reasons of what had happened. It wasn’t that the consequences made them recoil, having become deaf was something that had just happened. The fact that their Stepfather had been so intent on believing his own lie to hurt them, that was what really bothered them. But they feared admitting to it, because of all the feelings it might unearth along with it. They took a sharp breath. “Yeah, maybe,” they said, the smallest twitch in the corner of their mouth. They didn’t want to talk about it, they didn’t want to make it real. They hadn’t cried in pain since the day they got stuck in the trampoline. They feared if they ever would cry again, they might never stop.
They nodded along, finding themselves interested in hearing about it, finding some part of them resonate with the idea of celebrating religious beliefs as a sign of respect. They nodded at the traditions however, reverting back to old ways was something they found themselves doing as well. They gave them comfort. “Do you turn to certain religions for specific aspects?” they asked. “Do you believe in a life after death?”
Sahid shook their head at the question. They had left most of their belongings in Astoria, which included the things they had collected for their little altar. They missed the tradition in their daily life however, the simple moment of recollection, of calmth, of setting their life in order. “I want to, I just haven’t found the time in day yet to actually… practice.” That was a lie, they just turned to a bottle of alcohol more often than they did to practice.
There was a smile on their lips, but it didn’t last too long. They scratched the back of their head. “I’m- inclined to agree with you, but I hope not too many more. When Cassie is found I plan on returning home,” they said. They felt odd for admitting it, because they weren’t sure what would happen to them if they returned, but they wouldn’t leave Cassie.
Sahid had to remind themselves that Tuah had shown no interest whatsoever in anything other than platonic friendship. Their heart was beating in their throat however at the suggestion of a private party, and they nodded mostly because most of their attention went into forcing a blush from appearing on their face. “Yeah sure,” they said, pretending to rub something out of their eyes to obscure the view of the darker shade on their cheeks.
