Oh, we could do it at night if that works better for you. Depending on the night, I mean. I work nights sometimes. Maybe some people are okay with being up all night. Or we could do day sessions and night sessions.
That'd be great! I work nights too, but luckily it's flexible a lot of the time.
I mean, I'm fine with being up all night. If other people are too, maybe we could sit down and read the whole thing at once then. But it's really up to you on the day/night split since it's your book club, right? I'd just skip any meetings in the day. Or if it's a fiction book. Not really my thing.
Are you going to start an email list or something for it?
[pm] We could definitely do that. Pamphlets could be something to look into for even more facts when someone is visiting a place of business you've partnered with or your booths that you set up. Maybe for every one who donates we could do something special as well, like a little get together with a few prizes to give out and even more information could be passed to them that way. Social media would also be something we need to utilize. Maybe an X account where you tweet one bat fact a day along with a donation link.
There's a big farming community here who would be very interested to hear about that, I'm sure. That's probably another angle we could spin at a booth at the farmers market, another pamphlet we could get made. The mosquito fact needs to be in every bit of your literature because that just made me love them a little more myself.
[pm] Do you think people would be interested in a bat get-together? Only I wouldn't want to require that people gave money. If we're planning something like that, it should be anyone who cares about pats, right?
And I can definitely post bat facts, I'll look into the X site. Is it pretty much the same as this one?
You know, the farmer's market sounds like a great idea. I can put together some flyers on it, if you want to hand them out at the next farmer's market. I'll add the mosquitos on it and everything.
In a graveyard in town. That's where [...] they were dropped off. It's not the best place for cows. I've definitely lost a few. I'm not sure if they've just wandered off, or something in the graveyard ate them or not.
Do you know any butchers? I've been trying to sell them, but I'm not having much luck. I'd definitely love any advice you have, especially considering your professional experience.
Are you an avid reader? Do you love a steamy romance? Do you love horror movies but always thought the monsters got a bad rap? Did you watch Shape of Water and scream ‘yas girl get it’ when she got freaky with the fish man? Did you watch that gargoyles show as a kid and want the big beefy stone men with wings to fly you away? Did you get phone calls from your local blockbuster with them begging you to return copies of Bram Stockers Dracula and The Lost Boys?
If you answered yes to more than one of these questions, then I have great news because I’m starting a book club because I scandalized the old bitties at the library who just wanted to read boring regular romances with the suggestion of ‘hugging’ a monster and they kicked me out of theirs. ! Message me for details! :)
Before you call Animal Control, yes, we are aware of the moose herds roaming through town. No, it is not a good idea to try and scare them with you car horn or an air horn. It's also not covered by insurance if you run your car into one to try and get them to move out of the way. Yes, they may charge at you so yes, you should avoid them.
We advise you carry earplugs with you in case any of the moose scream. If you have any other questions about the moose please leave me alone feel free to ask away.
How long do you you think until you all will be able to get them out of town? They're pretty bad for business. It took me three hours to drive from Nightfall Groove to Downtown the other day.
As a side note, does animal control ever do anything with cows?
Sure, I'd love a few. I'm guessing they are typically placed outside? I know this is probably a dumb question, but if I put it next to my hummingbird feeder, would it make the two of them upset? Or would it be fine since they likely would be going around it at different times?
Yeah, outside. Up high is usually good. Somewhere that gets sun is usually good too, to keep it warm enough. I don't know much about hummingbirds, honestly, but I think that should be fine. Like you said, I think since the bats are more nocturnal the two probably won't bother each other.
The bats won't drink the sugar water in the feeder either or anything, if you're worried about that. We only really have insect-eating bats in this area. The nectar-drinking ones are all a lot further south.
TIMING: Current
PARTIES: @saithebatguy & @recoveringdreamer
SUMMARY: Sai runs into Felix while on a (failed) cow-related errand.
As it turned out, getting a cow anywhere was hard. In the first place, Sai couldn’t bring it in his car, and he hadn’t thought to get a trailer before selling one to someone off Craigslist. It might have been easier if the cow were dead, but this person had specifically wanted a live one. They’d been pretty clear about that. Sai had made a sort of make-shirt leash with some rope from the hardware store, but even for a vampire, it was hard to tug the animal along. He’d snapped the rope once before resorting to holding out some grass in front of its face to coax along.
It took them almost an hour to get into the next neighborhood, which was around the time he got a ding on his phone. When he paused to look, he saw a text from the very person he was on his way to meet, My wife said we don’t have anywhere to keep the cow 😔. Good luck finding a good home for it!!
Sai stopped in the middle of the street. The cow grabbed the grass out of his hand, as he stared at his phone, thinking. He was starting to second-guess selling the cows one by one. Maybe he could just let the cow loose here and it could be someone else’s problem. He wouldn’t get any money out of it, but it would be one less cow in the cemetery. He wouldn’t have to spend another hour dragging it back either. He looked around, trying to decide if anyone nearby might object to the loose cow, and was surprised to see someone he recognized.
“Felix!” Sai called out, and tried to wave them over. Maybe Felix ate beef.
—
Leaving the boiler room felt… difficult lately. There was something almost funny about it, in a really unfunny kind of way. Felix had hated the boiler room since the moment Leo had insisted they move into it, felt itchy at the mere thought of spending any more time there than they absolutely had to. But… they were starting to think that the rest of the world was a lot safer when they were confined to those four walls. After all, locked away, they couldn’t accidentally poison their coworkers the way they had to Dillon. They couldn’t shift at an inopportune moment and tear their friends’ heads away from their necks, couldn’t make a terrible situation worse by throwing around claws and teeth and who knew what else. Felix hated the boiler room, but maybe it was where they deserved to be right now. Maybe they should try to stay there for as long as they possibly could.
It was easier said than done. The grocery delivery app they used had notified them that they would no longer be delivering to the Grit Pit, citing security concerns. Felix wasn’t sure if it was due to the general lack of safety in Worm Row or if one of the employees of the Pit had made a habit of harassing delivery drivers, but Felix wasn’t sure how much it mattered. Whatever the reason, the end result was the same: they couldn’t get their groceries delivered, so they had to go out and buy them. They had to leave the boiler room, had to risk everyone else’s safety by being out and about in a world they weren’t sure they belonged in.
Normally, they would have been pretty happy to hear someone call out their name as they made their way towards the corner store. Felix liked seeing their friends and the people they knew, enjoyed random encounters with familiar faces. But right now, it scared him a little. The jaguar was a silent force in the back of their mind, but their heart still stuttered with the knowledge that he was there, that he might be hungry. They prepared some excuse to give Sai about not being able to stay long, turning to face him and — faltering at the sight they were greeted with. There was Sai, who Felix had expected upon recognizing his voice. But there was also a cow. And the cow was a bit of a surprise. “Oh, hey Sai. Who, um… Who’s your friend?”
—
“A cow that I was hoping to sell,” Sai said. “Did you see the sandcastle contest? I won in one of the categories, and for some reason they sent me cows. So I’ve been trying to get rid of them”. It hadn’t been going well so far. A lot of people were turning down his offers for beef when they realized the steaks would come with the rest of the cow still attached. Sometimes humans seemed relatable, other times, humans showed just how different they were from vampires. They liked some distance from their food, to close their eyes and pretend it was basically a vegetable or something. He was sure there were some out there who were sensible about it, though, he just had to find them.
“Someone on Craigslist said they wanted one, but they just texted. I guess they don’t want it anymore. You don’t happen to eat beef do you?” Sai asked. From what little Sai knew about the other person, he thought they might land squarely in the squeamish about the whole thing category, but it never hurt to ask, right? “I could give you a great deal if you wanted.”
—
“Oh.” It was kind of funny — a few weeks ago, Felix might have pointed Sai in Monty’s direction. I know a guy with a dairy farm! They might have exclaimed. There would have been excitement, maybe, at the idea that they could help two people at once. But now… the thought of the farm still burning wouldn’t leave the balam’s mind, the hazy memories of the moments just before the shift hanging heavy over their head. They squeezed their eyes shut to chase it away, filling their lungs with a deep gulp and releasing the air through their nose in a way they hoped wasn’t obvious. “Yeah, I, uh, I saw the sandcastle contest. I got — I mean, they — I won a turtleneck. I didn’t know they were giving out cows, too.”
They shifted their weight, staring at the cow. The jaguar seemed to poke his proverbial head up from somewhere deep within their chest, clearly more interested in the cow than Felix was. Felix’s chest tightened at the feeling, nausea tugging at their gut at the thought of all the things they did eat. “I, um… I’ve been thinking about going vegetarian, actually. Meat’s not… It hasn’t been… agreeing with me lately.”
—
“Jonas said he got paintings, so I guess all the prizes are different, for some reason,” Sai said. “A turtleneck seems practical.” Maybe a little less profitable than a cemetery full of cows, but it’d certainly be less inconvenient. And less of a hassle to get rid of. “What was your sandcastle of?”
As they talked the cow finished the wad of grass it was working on, and mooed at no one in particular. He’d probably have to grab something more soon, otherwise it might start trying to wander off in the wrong direction again. Of course, if he could convince Felix to buy the cow, it would be one less thing, or one less cow, to worry about at least.
“There’s a lot of that, I think,” Sai said. “Vegetarianism. I guess it’s popular with hu— people right now. Maybe you have a friend who eats beef? I bet it would make a nice gift.” It would probably depend on the friend, though. Plenty of things might make better gifts sure, but those things wouldn’t leave Sai down one cow. At least it sounded like more of a digestive thing than a moral stance, so Felix probably wouldn’t have a problem giving a cow to someone else to eat.
—
“I guess so. My sandcastle was a turtle, so maybe it’s tied to what you made. Was yours, uh… a sand cow?” They hadn’t seen any sand cows when they’d walked the beach to look at the structures, but there was always a chance the ocean had washed Sai’s entry away.
Felix watched the cow, watched the way it moved. There was something almost relaxing about it, they thought; the cow was thoughtless, with no consideration for the world around it, but it was still peaceful. And, in a way, Felix was embarrassingly jealous of that. It was stupid, wasn’t it? To feel envious of a cow, to wish they could be mindless without being destructive. They sighed, turning their attention back to Sai instead. That was easier, really. It hurt less.
“I don’t know if I’m a vegetarian, really.” It wasn’t really an option on the table, given the way the jaguar would eat whatever he wanted when he was in control. “I just don’t eat meat much. I have friends who do, definitely.” They thought of Wyatt, or Anita. “But… I don’t know. It seems mean to eat him. The cow, I mean. I know people do, it’s just — I’ve never been, um… acquainted with a cow that I ate later. It feels wrong.”
—
“Nothing like that,” Sai said, shaking his head. “It was a typical sandcastle, but sort of in the shape of the bat. For the Bat Conservation Society. Jonas helped with it too, if you know him. The baker at the Bread Cemetery. He said his prize were worm paintings. Maybe it had something to do with an animal theme in general.”
Felix seemed at least a little bit interested in the cow from the way they were looking at it, so maybe it wasn’t a completely wasted trip. At least if Sai could find the right selling point. “I mean, I don’t know that you should make friends with it or anything,” Sai said. “At least if you’re going to eat it. But I think it’s probably normal to see your food when it’s still alive. You know, the circle of life and all that,” It seemed a pretty standard part of the animal kingdom unless you were more of a scavenger. It was unnatural, really, if you thought about it, to not kill your food yourself. At the same time, he could understand not wanting to get to know your food too well. He didn’t make a habit of getting to know people he planned to bite himself.
“Or maybe you want it as a pet or something. You could use it for…” Sai tried to think if he knew what Felix did, but realized he wasn’t sure about his job. “Well, I’m sure they’re good for other things too. Mowing your lawn, maybe?” He’d read some articles about local goats for hire for a similar purpose. Why not cows instead? “It’s pretty tame, I think. It doesn’t bite or anything as far as I can tell, and you can get it to go just about anywhere if you use some grass or something like that.”
—
“Oh.” Well, there went Felix’s attempt to rationalize the prizes people had received from the sandcastle tournament. Maybe trying to apply logic to things like this was always going to be something of a lost cause. Logic never did very well in Wicked’s Rest, after all. “Yeah, I know Jonas. He’s nice. Does he, um… like worms? Do you like cows? Maybe it’s tied to what the person likes?” Did Felix like turtles? They didn’t dislike them, and maybe that was enough.
Their throat felt a little dry all of the sudden. Sai was saying it was better not to make friends with something you were going to eat, and he was right, of course, that was just common sense, but — it was hard for Felix not to think about the farmhands on Monty’s farm. It was hard for them not to remember looking at Daisy one moment, panic seizing his chest, and waking up the next miles away with blood on his tongue. You shouldn’t make friends with something you were going to eat. Maybe that meant Felix was better off not making friends at all. They tore their gaze away from the cow with some difficulty, focusing on Sai instead. “I guess I’m more used to buying meat at the grocery store,” they said, trying to keep their voice neutral. It quivered a little, but… they could probably blame that on being sad about the cow, couldn’t they?
“I, um, I don’t really have room for a pet cow.” Even if they’d been in their apartment instead of the boiler room, they doubted the cow would have fit. Apartments weren’t really built for cows. “And I don’t have a lawn, anyway, so that’s — you know, that wouldn’t be something I’d need. Maybe you could, uh… rent it out to people? For mowing their lawns, or parties, or whatever. Then you could afford to keep it yourself, right?”
—
Sai shrugged. “I don’t really care about cows.” He thought about Jonas’ kidnapping story. “And I don’t think that Jonas likes worms, either. Maybe the prizes were donated or something? Although I don’t know why anyone would donate a herd of cows.” Something about Felix seemed a little off, but Sai couldn’t quite put his finger on it. Maybe they were just more thrown off by thinking about eating a cow they’d met than Sai realized. He’d underestimated how squeamish some people were about that sort of thing.
“That’s fine”, Sai said, only a little put out. “I’m sure someone will eat them.” Although it was starting to feel like all the carnivores in town were staunch patrons of the grocery store, and weren’t interested in branching out. He needed a new angle on selling these cows. Most of his attempts so far hadn’t amounted to much.
“That’s not a bad idea, actually. Only I have a 100 of them. Maybe I could keep one for that sort of thing, if I people might actually interested.” Although there was also the question of if Sai wanted to bother with that. It had been hard wrangling this one cow through town. “Would you rent a car for parties?” Sai asked, figuring he already had someone to serve as a sort of focus group here in front of him.
—
“Oh.” So much for making sense of things. Felix guessed they didn’t have very strong opinions on turtles or turtlenecks, either. Donated prizes being doled out at random might make some sense, they supposed; though Sai made a good point about a herd of cows being an odd donation. “Maybe someone just needed to… get rid of them.” They looked at the cow, who blinked its big, brown eyes at him. It was hard to imagine anyone just throwing an animal away like that.
They found themself wishing they could take the cow, if not for Sai’s sake than for the cow itself. The idea of it being eaten, now that they’d seen it, made their stomach churn a little. It was probably related to Monty’s farm, they knew, to the still-fresh memories of the screams of dying animals through the smoke and flames.
But they knew it was unrealistic for Sai to keep a hundred cows, and Monty no longer had a farm to send them to. Selling them to butchers’ shops might be the only play Sai had. Felix doubted he had room to house a whole herd of animals this size. But… maybe one or two was doable. “I’d rent a cow for parties,” they replied truthfully. “I bet parents would for kids, too. Kids love cows!” Right?
—
“Maybe, but 100 cows?” Sai asked. “It seems like anyone who had them could sell them for a profit instead of giving them away.” Although as he said it, he thought again. If the recent weeks had taught him anything, it was that cows were harder to get rid of then you might think. “Although maybe not. I haven’t had the best time selling them myself. Maybe there’s just not a big market for them with all the vegetarians.”
“I think kids love most animals,” Sai added. That had been the case with his own, as least. Although as soon as caught himself thinking back on that other life, he pulled himself back to the present. It wasn’t any use to think about it now. The vampires were his family now. Vampires and bats, and clearing the cows out of the graveyard would help one of those, at least. The novelty of the cows at Eluria Cemetery had worn off quickly for most of the Noxferatu.
“Well if you need one for any upcoming event, let me know. I have plenty,” Sai said. “Or if you think of a friend who would want a cow not from the grocery store.” He’d take this particular cow around the corner and set it loose, he decided, since wasn’t sure if Felix would take issue with it. The idea of dragging it all the way back to the graveyard seemed like a terrible way to spend his night. “It was good seeing you.”
—
Was there a market for selling cows? Felix thought Monty might know, but it seemed cruel to ask him or to send Sai his way so soon after the fire at the farm, so Felix said nothing instead. They shrugged, wondering if Wicked’s Rest was really that much of a hot spot for vegetarians. “Maybe you should try the night market?” They suggested. “The one that moves around? Someone might be interested there.” There were probably spellcasters who needed cows for… something. Felix tried not to think about what people might use the animals for. It wasn’t fair to expect Sai to keep 100 cows just because Felix disliked the idea of them being hurt.
“Yeah!” They agreed. “Kids like all animals. And farm animals are, uh, really popular.” Were they? Felix knew next to nothing about kids in general. They’d been the youngest of their siblings, and it wasn’t as if the life their family had lived had allowed for any nieces or nephews to get to know in their adult life. But they’d liked farm animals as a kid, hadn’t they? Maybe that could be some kind of a hint.
He smiled as Sai offered one of the cows for any upcoming events, wondering if that meant they’d had some success in convincing the other to keep the animals. Maybe Sai would hold on to one or two. “I’ll definitely call you if I need any cows,” they promised. “And, uh, yeah! It was really nice seeing you, too. And your cow!”
[pm] Oh. I can appreciate a person with strong opinions. Tell me more about these nefarious policies. I’m extremely adept at writing a letter of complaint.
[pm] Mostly I have a problem with their rabies policies. If you want to learn a little more about the problem with the current approach to rabies, you can learn more in this flyer. It's not only a problem here, misconceptions about bats and rabies are pretty widespread
I've talked to them about it before, but they don't seem to want to listen to individual complaints. But I think every letter or call counts. If enough people write in, they might start to get the message.
I'm always onto something. I have great ideas all the time and know what I'm talking about. Trust me, I used to live on a ranch. The step count matters.
[it doesn't]
You're not passionate about cows but you have 100??? How the hell did that happen? What's wrong with them?
I'll keep that mind mind. Were you ever involved in selling the cows?
I won them in a competition. They seem fine though. At least as far as I can tell, but I'm not really an expert. I'm sure they have a great step count considering they're just wanted around.
[pm] That's so wise of you! Some people straight up get mad when things change, you know? It's probably my one ick. Like, the world moves forward buddy! Just cause it's different it doesn't mean it's bad. Oh nope. I mean, I don't run into rivers anymore...but my navigation skills are only reserved for ceme can get me in a lot of trouble!
I had not thought about that, actually! I think I'd be a fun driver. Everybody wants someone to chat them up while you're on the way home after work, amirite? [user experience is unique] Plus, my playlist game would be unmatched. WOW, that's super nice of you and totally the kinda vibe we should be bringing into work. It's us against the big machine after all!
[pm] People just get stuck in old habits, I think. Or sort of lose touch with the modern day. I'm always amazed with most of the new technologies I learn about, though, I don't know why anyone would want to miss out on all of that.
[...] Anymore? Have you run into rivers before?
That sounds perfect. People don't always like when I turn them down for a ride, so it'd be handy to have someone else to pass them off to.
Me either. Maybe an all day affair would be [...] fun. It might be nice to just be around people all day and know exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. But people are busy, I guess.
I'm more of a night sort of person, but if you all were considering doing it as a nighttime affair I might be interested. The time might still be an issue though, I don't think most people really want to be up all night.
[pm] Look at you! Looking all profesh. And like you don't know where the front cam is <3 Those are the best ones right? The people who can navigate the streets by memory and not silly apps. I'd trust a ride on your car. I WILL craft the perfect business card and hand it to you, you're the best.
Now? LOL I'm pretty sure there were computers and DVDs and a buncha stuff when I went to college.
It is :( things are defo slower during winter season. BUT, I think this year I could ask my bone partner for her car.
[pm] I mean, I still use Google Maps and that sort of thing if I need it. I don't see any reason to avoid technology just for the sake of it. I am a decent navigator though. But I imagine, depending on how long you'd been delivering, you've probably developed a pretty good sense of direction too.
[user doesn't reply to that comment. He's not sure if he's the right fake age to see all of this computer stuff as brand new].
Have you ever thought about doing a rideshare type of thing if you're going to have a car to borrow? If you want, I could try to send a few people your way when I'm not able to pick them up.
Oh, I would love that. I could also just use them as a good reminder for myself and also a talking point with customers. Do you have any fun bat decorations? I could always put some up; it's starting to be that time of year anyway.
I have bat boxes. I'd be happy to give you some if you wanted to display them or even hand them out. They're not really Halloween themed, if that's what you're thinking of, but you could probably draw a bat or something on them.
I don't know, I think some people just like to feel fancy so they buy the separate device. Whatever gets them reading I guess.
Exactly! The library has always been like a safe space for me, I love visiting. As far as their technology I guess it depends on which library you go to. But sometimes it's nice to just walk up and down the aisles and think. Sometimes it's the only quiet place there is.
It's one of my favorite places too. It's a great place to get work done.
I think the Internet has done a lot for making information widespread and accessible too, but the library has already been doing that for decades, if not longer. It's hard not to respect that. Besides, like you mention, it's always nice to read a hardcopy book.
Speaking of which, thank you for the book! I read the first bit and it looks great. How have the reviews been so far?
[delivered with a handwritten note on the title page]
“I know you’re not the biggest fan of fiction but I thought it fitting that you receive a copy since you did help me with it!
-EB”
[Sai actually sits down to read the novel one night and makes it through a few pages. He leaves it in his backseat next to some bat flyers. Maybe some of his riders want to read it on longer car rides? He’s not a good judge of fiction, but it seems pretty good for a fictional novel.]
