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almost home
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@sallyba3
𝘓𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘙𝘪𝘣𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘐𝘯 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘏𝘢𝘪𝘳 :¨·.·¨: ⌜🗝️ ⌟ ─── ⋆ writing acct
Somewhere down the line - N.S.
Chapter four. Chapter three here.
AN: Here's chapter four. Again, thank you so much for all the love on my little series. This one is short and sweet. I thought about making it longer but decided that this chapter should be one scene only. <3 Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist and I apologize if I forgot to tag anyone!
Warnings: Established relationship, pregnancy, reader is nervous, fluff!!! <3
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x F! reader.
Words: 1.3 k
”Noah… I’m pregnant.”
Noah went completely still underneath you. He simply stared at you. His hands were still cupping your face but his thumbs had stopped moving. You couldn’t tell if he was still breathing or not. The only sign of life was a slight movement of his mouth. Noah's lips parted as though he was about to say something. But nothing came. He simply stared.
You weren’t really sure what reaction you were hoping for, or even what you were expecting. All you knew was that it wasn’t… this.
You were expecting a reaction.
You waited. One second. Two. Three. Nothing came. Not a word. Not a sound. No movement.
The silence stretched out between you until it felt unbearable. Say something. Please. He didn’t. He just looked at you with his lips slightly parted.
A faint ringing filled your ears. Your stomach dropped and you could feel panic bloom in your chest.
“I know,” you blurted before he had the chance to find his voice. “I know we never planned this. I know the timing is awful and you’re on tour and that we’ve never actually talked about it and I know Nick shouldn’t have found out before you and—”
Your voice cracked. More tears streamed down your face.
“I tried to tell you. All day. This is why I came here... I swear I tried.”
You lifted your own hands to cover your eyes. You couldn’t look at him. You even tried to push his hands away from your cheeks, but they were cemented to your face.
”I just— I didn’t know how. Every time I tried I couldn’t do it. Or something happened,” you cried. ”I was— I am so scared. I’m so, so sorry. I’m so scared, Noah. I’m so scared I’ve ruined- that I’ve ruined everything.”
And just like that, he moved. He gently pried your hands from your eyes. You couldn’t look at him.
”I’m sorry,” you whispered again, barely audible.
”Angel…”
His voice was scarcely more than a breath.
He slid one finger beneath your chin, tilting your face back towards him.
“Look at me.”
Reluctantly, you met his eyes. They weren’t angry. Not disappointed. Barely even confused. Just… soft.
Before you could say another word, he closed the distance between you. Both of his hands cupping your face, his lips found yours.
He kissed you as though he was trying to quiet every fear that had been living inside your head. It was silent ”I'm here”. A silent ”You’re not alone in this.” A silent ”We’re okay.”
One of your hands found his bare chest, palm pressing over his heart. The steady, rhythmic beat underneath your fingertips helped slowly bring your frantic pulse down. As the kiss broke apart, Noah rested his forehead against yours, his nose brushed softly against yours as the two of you tried to catch the same shaky breath.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered.
His brows knit together.
“Sweetheart, why are you apologising?”
“Because I—”
“No.”
His hands found yours where it still rested over his heart. He put both hands over yours, pressing it against his chest.
“I’m the one who should be sorry,” he began. “I’m sorry you thought that you had to carry this all by yourself.”
You looked up at him, the sincerity written all over his face making your breath hitch.
“How long have you known?”
“Ten days.”
He let out a whistle of a breath.
“But…” you closed your eyes. “I told Nick.”
“... Nick knew?”
You opened your eyes, giving him a small smile.
“I panicked. I took that old test… Do you remember? The one from two years ago?”
He nodded.
“And it was positive. I thought that it might’ve been… expired?”
“I think they do expire, yeah.”
“So I bought another three. I even got one of those expensive digital ones.”
Noah closed his eyes, an almost pained expression painting his features. Like the thought of you doing all of this by yourself physically wounded him.
“And well… They were all positive. I’m so sorry, I should’ve… I just panicked. I needed to tell someone. I didn’t want to tell you over the phone.”
You bit the inside of your cheek.
“I don’t even remember calling him. I think I was on auto-pilot,” you said. “He wasn’t talking to his mom inside that storage closet. It was me. I had just told him.”
Noah opened his eyes and let out a shaky laugh.
“I can’t believe he’s managed to act so… normal…since,” Noah said. “But I’ve been wondering why the hell he was talking to his mom in there.”
The corners of your mouth twitched and you let out the first real laugh since before you took the first test. And it was like you couldn’t stop. It flowed out of you, and Noah started laughing too. For the first time in ten days, the weight on your shoulders didn't feel quite so heavy.
As your laughter subsided, a silence filled the room. But this time, it didn’t feel suffocating. It felt calm. Safe.
Noah broke the silence first.
“I’m gonna be a dad.”
You nodded.
Noah shook his head slightly before letting out the smallest, disbelieving laugh.
“...Wow.”
You could see his eyes welling up, the faint glow from the bedside lamp gleaming in them. He blinked rapidly as a single tear escaped, rolling down his cheek.
The sight of his tears undid you completely, your own tears were not far behind.
“No, no, no,” he sounded almost panicked. “Baby, no. Why are you crying?”
“I’m just so happy.”
And you were, you really were. Laying with your back against his chest in the dark moments later you couldn’t recall ever feeling so happy before.
He pulled you even closer to him. Almost instinctively, his hand settled on your stomach. This time, though, it didn't stop there. His thumb traced slow, absentminded circles over the fabric of your shirt.
"...Wow," he whispered, pressing a kiss to the back of your head.
You placed your own hand over his.
“I know,” you whispered.
Noah let out a quiet chuckle.
“I didn’t think I could love you any more,” he stated. “I guess I was wrong.”
You intertwined your fingers with his, brought them up to your lips and kissed his knuckles.
”Are you scared?” Noah asked quietly.
”Terrified.”
”Me too.”
There was a small silence.
”I can’t believe I’ve missed ten days already,” he admitted.
”I’m sor—”
”Please stop saying sorry, sweetheart.”
You turned around so you were facing him. The streetlight outside shone through a gap in the curtains, providing just enough light for you to make out his features. You lifted your hand, tracing your fingers over his jaw out of habit.
“I do wish that you had been there,” you confessed. “It has been so hard lying to you.”
He sighed.
“I do too,” he said. “But I know now.”
“You do.”
“We’re going to be someone’s parents.”
You smiled.
“I hope they look like you,” you whispered.
“Like me?” he huffed. “I hope they look like their mom.”
Like their mom. You weren’t prepared for how that word would sound coming from his lips. It made your heart feel so full it almost ached.
”Did you ever imagine this?” you asked.
He hummed. ”I did, yeah.”
”You did?”
”Not quite like this, no,” he began. He was quiet for a second. ”But of course I imagined starting a family with you.”
”Sometimes after shows I’d see dads carrying sleeping kids back to their cars, little legs hanging over their fathers arms” he continued. ”I always wondered what that would be like.”
”You did?”
”Yeah.”
”With me?”
”You goof,” he snorted. ”There has never been a version of my future that didn’t have you in it.”
---
Tags: @platespaghetti @copper-locks @mrslumi @itsfarbettertolearn @thedeathofpeaceofmymind @dyingtol0ve @chipotlebagnoah @peace-of-mind-is-less-than-never @beartoooth @idwtmoney @theanarchymuse95 @chey-h @mushrumink @leosunshine @runningincircl3s @gayfiretruck @spookypeachpitt13 @coasttocold @lowergroundfloor
Just perfect 🥹 <33333333333
Somewhere down the line - N.S.
Chapter three. Chapter two here. And chapter four here.
AN: Here's chapter three. Thank you so much for all the love on my little series. I initially thought it'd be five chapters at most, but I've changed my mind and there's definitely gonna be more. Chapter four on Sunday! <3 Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist and I apologize if I forgot to tag anyone!
Warnings: Established relationship, pregnancy, Nick is the best as always, reader is nervous, fluff! <3
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x F! reader.
Words: 4.2k
“...Baby?”
You didn’t even reply. You let your bag slide off your shoulder, not even noticing it hitting the floor. It only took one small step until you were in his arms. His hoodie felt so soft under your hands as you wrapped your arms around him. You could hear his heart beat rhythmically as you rested your cheek against his chest.
Noah stood still for a moment before wrapping his arms around you, pulling you impossibly closer. You could feel his whole body relax as he melted into the embrace. He lifted a hand to cradle the back of your head, tucking your head under his chin. You simply stood there, your fingers clutching the fabric of his hoodie as he nuzzled his nose into your hair.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, rubbing small circles on your back.
And that was when the floodgates opened. Large, hot tears started to stream down your face and onto the fabric of his hoodie. Noah didn’t notice until he felt your shoulders starting to shake. He tried to lean backwards a little to look at your face, but you buried it deeper into his chest.
“Woah - baby? Are you crying? What happened?”
You just clung tighter to him.
“Is everyone alright? Is your family okay?”
You hiccuped a little. “I just missed you.”
“Oh sweetheart… You flew all the way here because you missed me?”
You nodded.
Noah carefully pried your hands from his where they were tangled in his hoodie. He took half a step back, taking your face in both of his hands.
“Let me look at you.”
You finally glanced up to meet his gaze. His eyes softened as they met your watery ones.
“Oh my sweet angel…” He rubbed his thumbs over your cheeks, wiping your tears away.
“C’mere,” he whispered as he pulled you back in.
A few moments later you were sitting cross-legged on the end of Noah's bed while he unpacked your bag as though it was the most natural thing in the world.
“How long are you staying?”
“Until after the show, I think.”
“I feel like four hoodies is a bit excessive, no?”
You frowned at him. “I packed three?”
Noah shook his head and started to pull hoodies out of your bag.
“One… Two… Three…” He pointed at the hoodie that he was wearing. “Four!”
You snorted and threw the nearest pillow you could find at him.
“Hey!” He threw the pillow back at you. “Here I am, being a nice boyfriend and unpacking for you and you assault me with a pillow?”
“Dork,” you muttered under your breath.
“Oh really?” Noah's eyes narrowed playfully.
You lifted an eyebrow. “What?”
A slow grin spread across his face.
“Oh, it's so on.”
Before you even had time to react, he lunged at you.
“Noah!”
You barely managed to squeal before he tackled you backwards onto the bed, the mattress bouncing beneath the two of you.
“You started this,” he said matter-of-factly.
“I did not!”
“You absolutely did.”
His fingers found your sides. He knew exactly where you were ticklish. You twisted beneath him, trying to squirm away, but every attempt only made him laugh harder. His fingertips danced over your ribs before slipping to your waist, drawing another helpless shriek from you.
“No- No! Noah!”
“You surrender yet?”
You tried pushing him away to no avail, he was so much stronger than you. You planted both hands against his chest and pushed with all your strength. He didn't budge.
“Never!”
“That was the wrong answer.”
He attacked again, relentless.
Laughter echoed through the hotel room as you twisted beneath him, trying desperately to grab his wrists. It was hopeless. You couldn't even catch your breath anymore. Tears stung the corners of your eyes, your stomach already beginning to ache from laughing so hard.
“Noah-” you wheezed between laughs. “Please! Mercy!”
“That's not surrender.”
“I hate you!”
He gasped dramatically.
“That hurts."
“I love you! Mercy! Mercy!”
His hands froze immediately.
A grin tugged at the corners of his mouth.
“Better.”
Only then he leaned in to steal a kiss before finally letting you breathe. You laid back, both hands clutching your stomach. You took a few deep breaths to stifle your giggles. You turned your head sideways to look at him only to discover that he was already looking at you.
“I’m so happy you came. I’ve missed you so much,” he whispered.
You smiled.
“So have I,” you said. And you meant it. You just wished those were the only words you needed to say.
Noah suddenly jawned, his eyes drooping a little.
“Tired?”
He didn’t answer. Instead he simply pulled his phone out from his pocket, set an alarm and pulled you closer to him. Oh how you had missed the feeling of his tall frame surrounding you. You let out a content little sigh and leaned back into him. One of his large hands found its way to your stomach, fingers splaying over your soft skin under your shirt. You went perfectly still. Your heart stuttered. It was such a small gesture, something he usually did - but this time it carried a much heavier meaning.
Noah fell asleep within minutes. You turned around in his arms so that you could look at him. For a while you simply observed him. How his hair had gotten long enough to fall down in front of his eyes when he slept. For a moment you wondered if he was planning to grow it out or not. You smiled to yourself, remembering the boy you fell in love with seven years ago. His hair had been longer than yours, his cheeks rounder than they were now. The man in front of you looked more chiseled in every way. But he still had the same smile, the skin around his eyes still crinkled in the same way when he laughed. And above all, he still made you feel the same way as he did back then.
“You’re gonna be such a good dad,” you whispered, barely audible.
You hadn’t even noticed that you were falling asleep. The familiar sound of Noah's alarm woke you. He reached out without opening his eyes, tapping the bed with his hand to find his phone. His eyes shot open when his hand landed on you.
“Oh my god. I forgot you were here!”
“Rude,” you mumbled.
“I’m sorry sweetheart.” He reached for you, pulling you on top of him. He smiled up at you, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. His lips met yours in a tender kiss. Your heart swelled. You should tell him. Now.
You were just about to open your mouth, but Noah was faster.
“Coffee?”
Outside of the hotel you pulled your jacket a closer around you, shivering a little.
“Cold?”
“A little.”
“Want my hoodie?”
“Noah. You’re not even wearing a jacket.”
He looked down at his own body.
“Yeah. I know. But still.”
You rolled your eyes at him. "Absolutely not. I’ll warm up as we walk.”
Noah shrugged before reaching for your hand. Your fingers intertwined with his as you started walking.
“Are you not supposed to be at work? I just realised,” he asked, glancing down at you.
“I called in sick,” you shrugged.
He stopped in his tracks.
“Y/N.”
“That’s me.”
“You called in sick to work because you missed me?” he frowned.
“...Yeah,” you answered hesitantly. Because that was not the whole truth, was it? You started walking again, pulling him with you. You didn’t want to give him the chance to study your expression for too long.
“What if your boss finds out?”
“You’re gonna tell her? Gonna snitch on me?” you joked, elbowing him slightly in the ribs.
He let out a bark of a laugh.
“Yeah, obviously. Gonna get you fired so you can come on tour with me instead.”
You rolled your eyes. His tone of voice was sarcastic, but you knew that there was some truth to it. The band had gotten big enough that your income didn’t make that much difference, and Noah had suggested that you could always quit. He’d even suggested that the band could employ you in one way or the other. You thought that it was sweet in a way, that he wanted to spend every day with you, but you also thought that you’d lose your mind if you didn’t have anything of your own.
The two of you crossed the street together. Once you reached the opposite sidewalk, you found yourself walking closest to the road. A second later, Noah casually guided you to the other side of him, taking your place nearest the traffic.
“What?”
“You were on the traffic side.”
“So?”
“So now you're not.”
Five minutes later, the familiar green Starbucks sign came into view.
“You're buying,” Noah declared.
“I flew across the country to see you!”
“Exactly. You clearly have money.”
You just huffed and shoved him inside. Your nostrils filled with the scent of freshly brewed coffee and baked goods. You felt yourself almost sniff the air, which made Noah grin and shake his head at you.
Noah went up to the counter. “Two large americanos please. And one of those cookies.” He pointed towards the cookie display.
“Actually, could I get mine decaf?” you interjected.
Noah looked at you, brows furrowed.
“Decaf?”
“Yeah… I- I’ve been cutting down on caffeine.”
“Since when?”
“Since recently.”
“...Who are you?”
You rolled your eyes. Noah turned back to the barista.
“Okay, one normal and one decaf then, please.”
Once outside Noah pulled the chocolate chip cookie out of the bag. He split it in two, one half clearly larger than the other. He handed you the larger piece without hesitation.
The two of you wandered through the streets of Chicago with paper cups warming your hands. Noah filled the afternoon with stories from the tour. A guitar case that had almost been left behind at a gas station. Jolly accidentally walking onto the wrong side of the stage. Nick getting his sandwich stolen by Noah halfway through lunch and refusing to let it go for the rest of the day, five days in a row.
"Apparently, I have a new nickname.”
”Oh?”
”They call me the seagull.”
”…Why?”
”Nick claims I’ve stolen his food.”
”Noah, you just admitted to me that you have been stealing his food.”
He shrugged. ”Well… I mean, yeah I have… but I feel like that’s beside the point!”
You laughed until your cheeks hurt.
For a little while, it almost felt like life had paused. There was no countdown. No secret weighing heavily in your chest. It was just you, Noah, and the city stretching out around you. Every now and then he’d bump his shoulder against you, smiling to himself as if though he couldn’t believe you were actually there.
You couldn't remember the last time you'd seen him this relaxed.
He stopped suddenly, pointing at a large building in front of you.
“That’s the one,” he chirped.
It looked massive.
“That's the arena?!”
He tilted his head sideways, looking down at you.
“Yeah. Today it’s empty… On Saturday, hopefully not.”
“Noah, it’s sold out. It’s not gonna be empty,” you stated.
He shrugged.
“How many tickets sold?” you asked.
A shy smile spread across his face.
“Ten thousand.”
“Woah.”
You looked up at him, watching him taking it in. In your mind, he was still the guy playing in front of a few hundred people. He put one arm around your shoulder, tucking you into his side.
“Crazy, isn’t it? That they’re all coming to see us?”
“I’m so proud of you.”
“Even after all these years?”
“Especially after all these years.”
You stood there for a few seconds. This was as good of a time as any. You closed your eyes for a split second.
You opened your mouth to speak but stopped as you noticed a group of girls a few feet away. They looked at the pair of you hesitantly. One of them whispered something to another. You could recognise that look from miles away. You gave them an encouraging smile.
One of them took a cautious step forward.
“Hi... I'm so sorry to bother you.”
Noah smiled immediately.
“You're not bothering me.”
“We just... we were wondering if it'd be okay to get a quick picture?”
“Of course.”
He glanced at you apologetically before stepping over to them.
You couldn't help but smile as you watched him chat with them for a minute, thanking them for coming to the shows before posing for a couple of photos. He never seemed in a rush. Even after they'd thanked him about six times, he was still the one wishing them a good day as they walked away.
He reached for your hand as the group of girls went the other way, giggling amongst themselves. Walking side by side you looked up at him.
“Noah, there’s something I…”
Noah’s stomach let out an unmistakable growl.
“...Was that?”
“Yeah. I'm starving."
“You just had half a cookie.”
“I should've gotten two.”
You threw your head back, laughing. If there was something Noah could do it was definitely eat. It seemed like he was always hungry. But to be fair, he was a very large man.
“We’ll have dinner in a few hours, yeah?”
“Oh yeah!” Noah started, “I forgot to tell you! We were planning on a big band and crew dinner tonight. But since you’re here I could-”
“No, no. That sounds great actually. I’ve missed the guys too.”
“More than me?”
"Definitely," you grinned. That earned you a light shove in the shoulders.
“Is there like a mall or something nearby? I didn’t bring big dinner-clothes.”
Now it was Noah's turn to roll his eyes. “Baby, you’d look amazing in a garbage bag.”
Two hours later you found yourself standing in front of the bathroom mirror, smoothing your hands over your new dress for what had to be the seventh time. You knew that this night was the night you had to tell him. You wanted it to be perfect.
The door opened behind you.
”Ready?”
You turned around.
Noah had already changed into a black button-up, sleeves rolled to his forearms. His hair was still slightly messy from the afternoon nap he’d taken as you’d gotten ready.
He looked you up and down.
”Wow…” he said, closing the distance between you.
Noah’s hand brushed against your side and came to a halt on your hip, the other settled in the small of your back. He pulled you into him, looking down at you with a certain glint in his eyes.
”We’re gonna be late,” he stated.
”No we’re not,” you replied. He looked slightly disappointed.
The restaurant buzzed with the familiar hum of conversations and clinking cutlery. Warm pendant lights hung low from the ceiling, casting a soft amber glow over dark wooden tables. The smell of grilled food, garlic and fresh bread filled the air as waiters weaved effortlessly between the crowded tables.
A long table had been pushed together near the back of the restaurant.The rest of the band and a few crew members were already there. Jolly spotted you first.
”Y/N!!!” he called, standing up from his seat. ”I heard you were in town!”
He pulled you into a bone crushing hug.
”Well,” you said trying to catch your breath, ”I just missed you too much Jolly.”
”Ahh, very understandable. Who wouldn't?"
You felt a hand on your shoulder. Bryan gave you a squeeze. ”I’m so happy you’re here,” he said. ”This one,” he pointed at Noah, ”has been a mess since last week.”
”Oh shut up,” Noah groaned.
You sat down between Jolly and Noah. Nick was on the opposite side of the table, observing you. He could see the way you stiffened when a waiter came to take everyone’s orders. Noah leaned into you, asking if you wanted a glass of wine. You declined, blaming a headache. Noah just nodded and ordered you a soda without paying it too much attention, but not without adding that you should drink some water too. Nick however noticed the way your eyes darted from Noah, to the candle on the table, to the untouched glass of water in front of you.
After the food was ordered the conversation bounced effortlessly around the table.
Jolly was in the middle of telling some ridiculous story about getting lost backstage in Germany on the last European tour.
“…I’m telling you, it wasn’t our stage.”
“It literally had our backdrop on it,” Folio deadpanned.
“No, that was afterwards.”
“It was before.”
“It was… somewhere in the middle.”
Laughter erupted around the table.
You barely managed to follow the conversation before it had already moved on to something else.
”So…” you said, taking a sip of your soda. ”I’ve heard that my boyfriend has earned a new nickname.”
”Oh he’s been awful!” Jolly exclaimed.
”New levels of shit housery, even for him,” added Davis.
”Hey!” Noah cut in.
”At lunch today he stole half my sandwich,” said Nick.
“The day before that, my fries,” Folio chimed in.
“This morning he took a bite of my bagel while maintaining eye contact,” Nick added.
Noah shrugged.
”You make it sound like I’m the problem.”
Nick raised an eyebrow. ”You ARE the problem, man.”
Noah shook his head, unable to hide the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
As if on cue, a waiter appeared with a tray full of steaming plates, setting them down one by one in front of everyone.
Noah shot Nick's fries a look.
”…Don’t.”
”Wasn’t gonna.”
Nick gave Noah an unimpressed look, moving his plate closer to himself.
You couldn’t help but giggle.
”Does he actually do this a lot?”
”YES!” Everyone answered as one.
Noah turned towards you, gave an exaggerated shrug and grinned at you like a little kid who’d just gotten away with something.
As dinner went on, the conversations around the table naturally splintered into smaller ones. Jolly was still defending his German mishap, while Bryan and a few other crew members debated the best burger they’ve had on tour.
Beside you, Noah had absentmindedly rested his hand on your thigh. Every now and then he traced small circles with his thumb through the fabric of your dress, as if to remind himself that you were really there.
Across the table, Nick watched this friend for a moment. Noah looked relaxed, happy. Noah was deep in conversation with the others, laughing at something Folio had said. Yet somehow, he never stopped facing you. His body remained angled towards yours. He looked completely at ease. Not like someone that had just been told something that would change the rest of his life. Nick focused his attention on you. You were smiling too, but the smile didn't quite reach your eyes. He also noticed that you were mostly moving food around your plate.
Nick caught your eye, tilting his head slightly and raising an eyebrow. Well? You looked down at your plate, giving him the smallest shake of your head. He closed his eyes for a brief second before exhaling quietly through his nose.
When dinner had drawn to a close, Noah told you that he just needed to use the bathroom. Nick seized the opportunity, putting his arm around your shoulders.
”Walk with me for a second, darling.”
He guided you out of the restaurant, stopping a few feet from the entrance. For a moment, the two of you just stood there. He searched your face, you looked at everything but at him.
”You didn’t tell him.”
You shook your head, biting the inside of your cheek.
”…What happened?”
Closing your eyes for a second, you exhaled deeply.
”I just… I couldn’t do it.” You scuffed the toe of your shoe against the pavement. ”I tried. But every time I was about to tell him, something happened. Something interrupted.”
Nick placed both hands on your shoulders, giving them a light squeeze.
”You’re looking for the perfect moment, Y/N.”
You nodded.
”There isn’t one.”
There was a moment of silence before Nick spoke again.
”You’re not protecting him. You’re protecting yourself.”
You lifted your gaze to hesitantly meet his. His expression was gentle, but there was an unmistakable determination behind it. He wasn’t judging you. He was trying to help you. You knew he was right.
”And I get it. I’d be terrified too.” Another squeeze around your shoulders. ”But he deserves to know.”
You tilted your head back, blinking rapidly in an attempt to keep your tears from falling.
”Look at him,” Nick continued.
You glanced through the window. Noah had just returned from the restroom and was joking around with the others, Ricky caught in a loose headlock while everyone laughed. Somehow, even in the middle of it all, his gaze instinctively wandered until it found you. The second he found you, his grin widened.
”He’ll be okay.”
”How do you know?”
You looked through the window once more, Noah caught your eye again. He tilted his head slightly, silently asking if everything was okay. You forced a smile.
”Because it’s him. It’s Noah.”
You moved your head in the slightest nod. Nick once again put his arm around your shoulders.
”Come on, mom. Let’s go.”
”I’ve told you to stop calling me that!”
The hotel room felt unusually quiet after the evening at the restaurant. You could hear your own heartbeat pounding in your ears. The sound felt intrusive, unwelcome.
”I can’t believe Nick is still mad about the sandwiches,” Noah said, toothbrush in one hand.
”I mean,” he continued, ”we’re supposed to be brothers!”
Silence.
”Y/N? Angel?”
”Hm?” you busied yourself with paying even more attention to the makeup remover in your hand.
”You okay?”
”Yeah.” You weren’t.
He leaned against the sink, arms crossed over his chest.
”You’re doing that thing.”
”What thing?”
”Where you say you’re okay even though you’re obviously not.”
”Oh.” You rubbed your eyes more intensely with the wipe. ”I’m just tired honey. Promise.”
He looked at you for a moment.
”Alright,” he said. ”I just… you know you can talk to me, right?”
”Mhm.”
Noah studied you for another moment before giving in with a quiet nod, not pushing any further.
No matter how tightly you closed your eyes, sleep refused to come. You needed to tell him. You cursed yourself for not getting to it. For having climbed into bed and curled up next to him without telling him.
”Alright,” came Noah’s voice beside you.
He sat up, reaching for the light on his bedstand. You heard a quiet click before the room illuminated with an amber glow.
”I give up,” he said. ”I can practically hear your brain frying. Whatever’s going on in there must be very loud.”
Slowly, you lifted your gaze to meet his. For a heartbeat, you simply looked at him. Really looked at him.
His brows knit together ever so slightly. There was something in your expression he’d never seen before. You looked frozen. His stomach tightened. You looked terrified. Not anxious, not upset. Terrified.
Like a deer caught in headlights.
“Angel…?”
Your lips parted, but no words came. Your eyes filled so quickly with tears that it almost startled him.
Then, all at once, you broke.
A sob tore through your chest as you threw yourself into his arms so hard it knocked the breath out of his lungs. He closed his arms around you, pulling you into his lap.
Your whole body trembled with violent sobs. You cried like he’d never seen you cry before. Noah felt so helpless. All he knew to do was hold you closer, rubbing your back and rocking you gently back and forth. He didn’t shush you, didn’t ask any questions. He just held you, continuously swaying and pressing kisses to your hair.
After a while, your sobs gradually became quieter, giving way to shaky breathing and the occasional hiccup. Your body stopped shaking so violently. And still, Noah just held you.
”Angel…”
”Look at me.”
You shook your head. His hold of you loosened, his arms snaking between you. He cupped your face with both hands, forcing you to glance up at him. He searched your face, his own stricken by the sight of you. You’d never seen him look so helpless. Not because you were crying, but because he couldn’t reach you. Because whatever was hurting you, you were carrying it alone. Because you would not let him in.
“It’s me,” he whispered.
Those two words, paired with the look in his eyes, broke through something inside you. You took a shaky breath and closed your eyes for just a second. When you opened them again, you met his gaze.
For the first time all evening, you didn’t look away.
”Noah… I’m pregnant.”
---
Tags:
@platespaghetti @copper-locks @mrslumi @itsfarbettertolearn @thedeathofpeaceofmymind @dyingtol0ve @chipotlebagnoah @peace-of-mind-is-less-than-never @beartoooth @idwtmoney @leosunshine @runningincircl3s @gayfiretruck @spookypeachpitt13 @coasttocold @lowergroundfloor
Somewhere down the line - N.S.
Chapter two. Chapter one here and chapter three here.
AN: I finished chapter two faster than I thought. I’m not completely happy with it, it’s feels a bit like a filler chapter. Chapter three will be better! Thank you for all the love on the first part. <3
Warnings: Established relationship, pregnancy, lies, Nick is the best, fluff!
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x F! reader.
Words: 3.4k
“So when are you seeing him again? Are you coming out for any of the shows?”
“I’m going to the Los Angeles one…”
Nick went silent on the other line. You heard a quiet exhale, followed by the faint rustle of fabric brushing against the receiver. You didn't need to see him to know he had just dragged a hand through his hair. He always did that when he was thinking. Or when he was trying very hard not to say the wrong thing.
“Y/N. That’s five weeks away.”
“Yeah… I know.”
“That doesn’t work. You know it doesn’t. Not for you, not for me, not for him.”
“I know.”
“Can you take time off from work? Come to an earlier date?”
You stared at the floor.
“I... I don't think so.”
“Think.”
You frowned.
“I could call in sick from work?”
A quiet huff of amusement escaped him.
“Okay. Yeah. If that's genuinely what you have to do, then that's what you have to do.”
You still had the positive test in your hand, absentmindedly tapping it against your knee. You weren't even sure why you hadn't put it down yet. Maybe because the second you did, it would all become real.
“What’s that tapping sound?”
You looked down to your hand, you hadn’t even realised that you were tapping it.
“Oh.” You let out a small breath. “It’s the test. I’m still holding it.”
“And you’re using it as a drumstick?”
“Apparently.”
“...Correct me if I'm wrong, but does that not have your pee like, all over it?”
You let out a small, incredulous laugh.
“Oh my god Nick! There's a cap on it.”
You heard a faint knock on the other side of the line. Someone was knocking on the other side of the supply closet door. A second later you could hear Noah's voice.
“What the fuck are you doing sitting on the floor in here? I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Soundcheck is about to start.”
You could almost hear Nick stiffening through the phone.
“Sorry man,” he said, sounding effortlessly casual. “Just talking to my mom.”
“Oh! Tell her hi from me.”
You didn’t even dare to breathe in case Noah would somehow hear you breathing and realise that Nick's mom breathes differently.
“Okay mom, I have to go. Noah says hello. I’ll text you after the soundcheck.”
The text came one and a half hours later.
Nick R: Okay mooom. I’ve looked at the tour schedule. I think Chicago would be best.
You: Don’t call me that. You’re literally older than me.
Nick R: But you are a mom… :)
Nick R: Or, you will be soon.
That hit harder than you'd expected. You would be soon. A mom. The word settled somewhere deep inside your chest. You were going to be somebody's mom. And Noah… Noah was going to be somebody's dad. Neither of those things felt real. Your phone buzzed again.
Nick R: Anyway, Chicago? 1,5 weeks away?
You: Could work, why Chicago?
Nick R: We have two days off. If you can get here, he’ll actually have time to process everything.
You: Yeah, okay. I’ll book a flight.
Nick R: Good.
Nick R: Scared?
You: Shitless.
Nick R: It’ll be fine. Don't chicken out.
You huffed loudly. Don’t chicken out. Like you actually had a choice. You were absolutely terrified, but you knew that you had to do this. With every passing second you could also feel an instinct settle somewhere inside of you. You wanted this. You wanted a family with Noah. The two of you were of course a little family in your own way already, but a baby? A mini Noah? A little best friend to always take with you? A real piece of Noah with you when he was away on tour? You found yourself hoping that the child would inherit all your favorite things about him; his kind nature, his softness, his dedication. It wouldn't hurt if the child inherited his warm eyes either.
Just as this realization hit you, a pit in your stomach began to form. You wanted this. But did he want this? You shook your head slightly. You didn’t know, and you wouldn’t know until you told him. The ticket to Chicago was booked five minutes later. Only 1,5 weeks. Ten days. You could get through that, right?
Loving Noah had never required lying before. The lies themselves were not the difficult part. Blaming work or not feeling well was easy enough. Looking Noah in the eyes every time he FaceTimed you was not.
The first few days weren't too bad.
The nausea was easy enough to blame on a stomach bug, and Noah accepted the excuse without much suspicion. He even reminded you to drink water and get some sleep before blowing you a kiss through the screen.
By day four, he started asking if work had really been that stressful.
By day seven, he asked if you'd done something to your hair.
"No?"
"You look different."
Your stomach dropped.
He wasn't looking at your hair.
He was looking at you.
“I’m just exhausted, Noah,” you said, trying to look convincing.
“You keep drifting off.”
He was lying in his bunk on the tour bus. His hair looked a little tousled. Faint purple shadows had started to bloom beneath his eyes. He squinted at you through the screen.
“Have I done something to upset you? I know I haven't called or texted as much as I should have.” He ran a hand down his face. “It’s just been so busy.”
Your stomach dropped. You hated the fact that he thought he had done something. Hated that you had made him feel like he wasn’t enough. Because he was, he always was. He had texted you multiple times every day since he left for tour. There had only been one day where he hadn’t been able to call you - and he had apologised profusely.
”Noah… I’m not mad at you,” you said gently. “There’s nothing you have done.” Except maybe put a baby in you.
He studied you for another few seconds.
"Okay," he said eventually.
But he didn't sound convinced.
That was made very apparent the next day when a bouquet of flowers showed up at your doorstep. The card only consisted of three words. I love you.
You almost picked up your phone to call him right then and there. But Noah deserved more, he deserved to be told face to face. You decided that you needed to put even more effort into your little charade. The fact that he was walking around believing you were mad at him made a lump form in your throat. Noah was in the middle of the biggest tour Bad Omens had ever done, thinking you were upset with him.
You snapped a picture of the flowers and sent it to him.
You: They’re gorgeous. You shouldn't have.
Noah: Yes I should’ve.
Noah: You’re at home?
You had felt so nauseous that morning that you decided not to go into work that day. You had told your boss that you had a migraine and needed to work from home.
You: Yeah. I wasn't feeling too good this morning.
You: Better now though, don’t worry!
Of course, he FaceTimed you immediately. You quickly brushed through your hair with your fingers and rearranged your face to a happier expression than the one you had been wearing the last couple of days, forcing the smile he'd grown so used to seeing.
The screen lit up with Noah's face. His black hoodie was pulled over his head, hair escaping around his forehead in every direction. He looked tired. The kind of tiredness that settled beneath his eyes after weeks on the road. But he still smiled the second he saw you, and somehow that smile alone made the distance between you feel a little smaller.
“Hi,” you said softly.
“There she is.”
And then, “Hold up. Look at this.”
Noah turned the camera around. He was standing on stage. The arena spanned out in front of him. Rows and rows of empty chairs. The floor looked like it was never-ending. Simply put; it was huge.
You audibly gasped.
“Noah! Honey, that's… It’s huge!”
He flipped the camera back around, a wide grin on his face.
“I know baby, and it’s sold out.” He shook his head like he couldn't believe it. “Can you believe we get to do this?”
His words hit you like a punch in the gut. What if your secret meant that he wouldn’t get to do this again? You ignored the sting behind your eyes and quickly arranged your features to a grin big enough to match his when you felt your smile starting to falter.
“I remember when you played in front of like… two hundred people.”
He threw his head back in laughter. “Do you remember that one show where half the audience decided to just leave halfway through?"
“How could I forget?”
“I must admit that was quite the punch to my ego.”
“Maybe you needed it.”
“Hey!” he interjected.
You tilted your head a little bit. “I’m so proud of you.”
His face softened. “Imagine this place full…”
“Full of people there to see you guys.”
He smiled.
“You seem more like yourself today,” he stated.
You looked at the flowers on the table in front of you, absentmindedly turning the vase a few centimetres before straightening one of the stems that had slipped out of place. Bright, colourful and completely undeserved. You had never wanted to tell him the truth more than you did in that moment.
“Yeah. I’m feeling a bit better.”
“Good.”
“Have you eaten today?” he added.
“Of course!”
He didn’t look too convinced.
“A real meal?”
“...Yeah.”
“Liar.”
“Okay. I’ve had a bag of chips,” you admitted.
“You’re hopeless.”
“Have you had any water today?”
Now it was his turn to look a little guilty.
“Yes…?”
“Yes?”
“I mean, the main component of coffee is water. Right? So like…”
“Coffee is not water, Noah.”
“It totally is!”
“Noah.”
“Fight me.”
You sighed. “I wish I could.”
“You can fight me soon. As soon as we’re back in LA.”
You smiled, your gaze drifting to the half-packed bag by the bedroom door.
Two days.
“You bet.”
Suddenly it was the night before your flight. You were finishing your packing. A shirt, your toiletries, phone charger, pregnancy test. You took the test out again, staring at it. Then you put it back, and subsequently took it out again. You put it back and looked at it for a while before finally deciding not to take it with you.
The alarm went off at 4:45 AM. You had already been awake for forty minutes. You stretched and sat up. You couldn’t tell if the nausea you were feeling was from morning sickness or nervousness.
At 5 AM your phone buzzed.
Nick R: Hi mom.
Nick R: Today is the day. Don’t chicken out.
You: Why in the everloving fuck are texting me at five in the morning?
Nick R: Because it's seven.
You: Right… Time zones.
Nick R: Did you sleep?
You: Of course not.
Nick R: Figured. Don’t skip breakfast.
Nick R: I’m serious.
Two hours later you had called in sick from work and were waiting at the gate for boarding. You’ve always been a bit of a nervous flyer. Not during the whole flight though, but taking off and landing had always freaked you out. Whenever you flew together, Noah would simply hold out his hand before the plane even left the ground, allowing you to squeeze it as hard as you could. He wouldn’t even complain about the little crescent moon shaped marks you’d always leave on the top of his hand. You looked down at your boarding pass, double and triple checking that you were at the right gate. You were. Looking down at your watch you wondered if you had time to go grab a coffee. You decided that you did. Halfway to the nearest Starbucks a thought crossed your mind. Could you even have coffee? A quick google search of pregnancy and caffeine made you decide to just get a small one.
A young family walked past you. The mother was cooing at her baby as the father pushed the pram. Would that be you in a year? The thought made you smile.
As you sat down on the uncomfortable plastic chair at the gate your mind started to work against you. What if Noah wasn’t at the hotel? What if you’d gotten the hotel wrong? What if the flight got delayed?
“Flight UA 1542 to Chicago now boarding at gate B27,” rang out through the loudspeakers.
You stood up, hoisting your bag over your shoulder. Instinctively you put a hand on your non-existent bump, almost wanting to protect what was growing in there as you boarded the plane.
After making yourself comfortable you went to put your phone on flight mode. You hadn’t noticed your phone buzzing.
Noah: Good morning baby.
Noah: I hope work isn’t too crazy today.
You answered with a quick “Good morning. Lots of meetings today, not gonna be able to answer for a few hours. <3” before turning on flight mode and securing your seatbelt. There was no turning back now.
As the plane began to taxi, your hand instinctively reached toward the empty seat beside you before you caught yourself. Noah wasn’t there to get you through takeoff. Your hand fell limply into your own lap. As the plane's speed began to build you clenched both of your fists as hard as you could. Only when the plane had reached cruising altitude did you unclench them. The tiny, red crescent moons in your palm actually kind of hurt. You made a mental note to not use your nails next time you flew together with Noah.
The pilot's voice crackled through the speakers as the plane touched down at O'Hare. You barely noticed the skyline in the distance as the plane slowed down. Chicago could've been the most beautiful city in the world and you wouldn't know. Right now, it was just the city where Noah happened to be.
You made your way towards the exit and swiftly made your way towards the nearest taxi. Sliding into the backseat you gave the driver the address Nick had provided you with. The driver met your gaze through the rearview mirror.
“Have you ever been to Chicago before?”
“No, I haven’t.”
He smiled.
"Business or vacation?”
What were you supposed to say to that? “I’m here to tell my boyfriend that he’s going to be a dad”? You just smiled.
“Visiting someone.”
The city drifted past outside the window. Glass skyscrapers, old brick buildings, people carrying coffee, cyclists weaving through traffic. You couldn't have described a single thing you’d seen five minutes later.
“Chigaco is a good city,” the driver smiled. “I think you’ll like it.”
“I’m sure I will.”
You sneaked a peak at the driver's GPS. You were only ten minutes away. Ten minutes away from the hotel, from Noah. A nervous flutter swept through your stomach.
You: I’ll be there in 10.
He replied instantly.
Nick R: I’ll meet you outside.
The thought of Nick's warm embrace calmed you down slightly. After all, he was the only other person in the world that knew. He was the only one that knew how your whole world had turned upside down the last ten days. And Nick was also the thing that had kept you sane.
You spotted Nick outside the hotel, casually leaning against one of the canopy pillars by the entrance. The closer you got to him, the louder your heartbeat became. By the time you had exited the taxi and he pulled you into a hug, your stomach felt like it had dropped several floors.
Nick pulled you into a hug without saying a word. He held you tightly, one hand resting between your shoulder blades as though trying to hold you together. When he finally stepped back, he didn't let go completely. His hands remained on your shoulders, searching your face for a long moment.
“You look terrified,” he stated.
“I am terrified.”
“You’ve got this, mom.”
You rolled your eyes. “Please stop calling me that.”
Nick pressed his room key to the little pad next to the elevator buttons, then he pressed the 14th floor. The elevator jangled a little as it started to move, every floor bringing you closer to Noah. Closer to finally telling him.
He noticed how your grip on your bag tightened and how you took a deep breath. Your nerves were written all over your face, your worry unmistakable.
“He’s in a good mood today, you know,” he stated.
You glanced at him. “How do you know?”
“He stole half my sandwich during lunch.”
You snorted. “That’s how you gauge his mood?”
“You know how happy stealing other people's food makes him.”
You returned your focus to the little display over the doors. Ninth floor. You nodded in acknowledgement. For some reason, Noah always seemed to think other people's food tasted better. Even when you ordered the exact same thing.
The elevator came to a stop and the doors opened. Nick stepped out. You didn’t. The doors began to slide shut again before Nick reached out and caught them with one hand.
“Hey.”
He reached for you, grabbing your wrist lightly. You looked down at his fingers, on the light grip around your arm. Then you looked up at him. Concern softened his features. Something in the way he looked at you made your feet move before your brain had a chance to object.You stepped out of the elevator.
“I’m scared.”
“I know.”
There was a moment of silence.
“Come on.”
Nick kept his grip around your wrist as he pulled you down the hotel corridor. You moved your feet without thinking about it. The further down the corridor you walked, the more light headed you felt. The ringing in your ears got louder and louder with every step. You felt like you could be sick. Or faint. Or maybe both.
Nick stopped in front of a door. 1418.
“This is him,” he stated.
You swayed a bit on the spot. Nick turned to you and pulled you into a hug. One of his hands splayed over your shoulder blades, the other cradled the back of your head.
“You’ll be fine. It’ll be fine,” he whispered in your hair.
You closed your eyes and nodded.
“I’m just next door. If you need me, I’m only ten steps away.”
He let you go, took a step over and opened the door to his own room.
And just like that, you were alone. You looked at the door, and you swore you could hear Noah humming in there. You raised your hand to knock, but then lowered it.
Your mind was pulling you in two different directions. One part of you wanted to sprint down the corridor, throw yourself in the elevator and take the first taxi available back to the airport. The other part of you wanted nothing else than to knock on the door and throw yourself in Noah's embrace, to feel his strong arms around you and to breathe his scent in.
You leaned forwards, both hands resting on your knees. You remembered that someone once told you to “breathe in a square” to calm your heart rate down. In through your nose, hold it, out through your mouth, hold it and repeat. So you did. A minute passed. Then two. When you felt like your heart was beating in a more normal rate you straightened up, put your hand up and knocked twice.
For a second, nothing happened. Then came the faint sound of movement from the other side of the door. You watched the handle slowly turn and the door swung open. And there he was.
Noah stood there in a faded black hoodie and grey sweatpants, one hand still resting on the handle. His hair looked like he'd only just run a hand through it, dark strands falling carelessly across his forehead.
For a heartbeat, he simply looked at you.
His expression shifted so quickly you almost missed it. Confusion. Recognition. Then a smile spread across his face, slow at first before it grew into something so bright it almost made your chest ache.
“...Baby?”
---
Tags:
@platespaghetti @copper-locks @mrslumi @itsfarbettertolearn @thedeathofpeaceofmymind @dyingtol0ve @chipotlebagnoah @leosunshine @runningincircl3s @gayfiretruck @spookypeachpitt13 @coasttocold
Somewhere down the line - N.S.
Chapter one. Chapter two here.
AN: Hiii, I'm a bit nervous to post this since I've only posted one shots before! I think I'll make it into a three or four part series and the rest will be less angsty. Again, english is not my first language. Hope you'll like it! <3
Warnings: Established relationship, pregnancy, angst, doubts, reader is terrified, some reassurance.
Pairing: Noah Sebastian x F! reader.
Words: 2.4k
How were you supposed to know which one to buy? And why was this aisle in the middle of the store? You felt nauseous, and you could feel the sweat gathering on your forehead. The sterile white light from the store lamps did nothing to calm you down. You tugged on the sleeve of your sweater, trying to focus on reading the packages. You could feel your vision starting to blur. What if someone saw you here? Not that anyone that truly mattered could, since they’ve all left town a week ago - but still.
You closed your eyes, pressing your palms to your forehead. Leaning forward a bit you took a deep breath and focused on breathing for a while. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Your mind was racing and you needed to regain your composure. But those two, faint, pink lines against the granite countertop of the bathroom sink shot to the forefront of your thoughts with ease. You had tried to reason with yourself; you used protection, your period had been late before and the test you had peed on an hour before was over two years old. These things expired, right? You had made Noah buy it for you when you missed your period back then. He had been even more nervous than you, but had refused to elaborate until you knew for sure. When you had told him that it was negative he had exhaled and pulled you into him, holding you without saying a word. He had kissed your forehead, your nose, the corner of your mouth. You kept the second test in the packet, pushing it to the back of the medicine cupboard. You had not really talked about the topic since.
A small gust of wind from the automatic doors of the store pulled you back to reality. You couldn’t just stand here forever. You shook your head slightly and reached for three different ones, more than one couldn't hurt, right? Like, what if one brand was better than the other? What if two tests somehow malfunctioned? Your eyes swept around the store before hastily making your way over to the cashier. She was an older lady, probably just years from retirement. With your brain in a state of chaos, the only thing you noticed about her appearance was her kind, green eyes. She smiled at you as she handed over the reciept.
“Have a nice day, dear.”
You nodded automatically. You couldn't remember if you thanked her.
The drive home was a blur. You stopped at a red light before realising it had turned green. You couldn’t remember the last four streets you had driven down. You couldn't remember if you had actually stopped at the stop sign or if you had slowed down enough through the school zone. At one point you had seriously considered whether you should pull over or not. You didn’t though. You kept driving, gripping the steering wheel so tight your knuckles whitened.
The small paper bag sat on the passenger seat next to you. It almost felt like it was threatening you. You refused to look at it.
Back home you placed the bag on the bathroom counter. You looked at it. You exited the bathroom, just standing in the corridor outside. Walking back into the bathroom, you looked at the bag again.
You huffed. “You’re being unreasonable,” you told your reflection in the mirror, “It’s just a test.” Technically, it was three.
Three tests that could change everything. What if you just… didn’t take them? Then nothing changes. You’d not be pregnant, Noah would still be on tour and blissfully unaware of the beads of sweat forming on your forehead.
Your phone buzzed. Of course he had chosen this very moment to text you.
Noah: I miss you. Big arena tonight.
Your stomach twisted. You couldn't bear to answer him with more than two red hearts. You decided that you should take a moment to collect yourself before taking a single test. Why had you bought three of them? One would surely suffice, right? But at the same time, more than one couldn’t hurt.
As it transpired half an hour later, it definitely couldn't. There were now four positive tests on the countertop in front of you. Three pairs of pink lines stared back at you, and of course the most definite of them all; the digital test. You had read the words over and over again without really understanding them. Pregnant. 3+.
“Holy shit,” you mumbled as you sank down on the closed lid of the toilet, test in your hand. You were pregnant. Three or more weeks pregnant. You looked around you, as if wanting him there would make Noah appear from thin air.
You closed your eyes, resting your head in your hands. A choked sob broke from you. You needed him. You needed him to tell you it was going to be okay. You needed Noah to tell you that whatever you wanted to do, you’d figure it out together. But Noah wasn’t there. He was on the other side of the country, probably doing a sound check. He had no idea that your world had just shifted.
Pulling your phone out from your pocket you looked at today's date. It was five whole weeks until you were supposed to see him in real life again. You couldn’t wait that long. You couldn’t keep this secret from him for that long. And nevertheless he would sense that something was wrong the second you called. That was one of your favourite things about your boyfriend - Noah could always read you, he could always tell when something was bothering you. You sometimes joked about him being a human mood ring. Noah also always knew what you needed. He gave advice when you needed it, comforted you when you needed it and made you laugh even when you felt like the world was crashing in over you if that was what you needed.
You looked back at the tests on the granite countertops again. There were no words for the feeling you were feeling. Confused? Scared out of your mind? Absolutely. But those feelings were also accompanied by a warmer feeling. A fleeting image of a small hand wrapping around one of Noah's long, tattooed fingers popped into your head. He’d be a good dad, you were sure of it. But still… A baby.
A baby.
The word settled somewhere deep in your chest, equal parts terrifying and impossible. But also wonderful.
You had always imagined children somewhere down the line. And you had always known that if you were ever going to have them; Noah was the only one imaginable to father them. But that was supposed to be in the future. After the tours became less frequent and shorter. After the constant flights, after the never ending facetime calls late at night. After your shared life revolved around departures and countdowns until you were reunited.
Not now.
There was also the fact that you and Noah had never really talked about it, not properly at least. There had been passing comments whenever you had seen a particularly cute family at the grocery store, or when he had spotted a toddler with oversized ear protection dancing at one of his shows. But there had never been a real conversation. No “do you want children?”, no “when?”.
What if he didn’t want them? What if his answer was “maybe in the future, but not now”? What then? What if he thought it would ruin the band?
Because if there was one thing you knew for sure it was that Bad Omens wasn’t a job to Noah. It was everything. Every sacrifice he had to make for the band to take off, every sleepless night, every year he had spent chasing something that had finally become real. Sold out arenas, tours booked several months in advance, headlining festivals, thousands of people screaming his lyrics back at him every night.
And now… This. You.
Somewhere deep inside you knew that this wasn’t where your mind should be running off to - you should be thinking about the tiny life that was growing inside of you. A mix of you and him.
But all you could think about were tour schedules, headline shows, flights. Cancelled tours. Cancelled shows. Noah’s passion, his drive, his work ethic. All he had done to be in the position to where you were in now, a nice house and stability the two of you could only have dreamt about when you met seven years ago. The thought made you feel sick.
Without realising it you had opened your phone, went to your "favourite contacts” list and pressed his number. Pressing your phone to your ear, you hid your face in your hand as if to hide even over a regular phone call.
He picked up after the first dial tone.
“Hello my darling!”
“Where are you?”
“Backstage, why?”
“Alone?”
“No, not at the moment. I’m with Foli-”
“Can you be?”
“...Yeah. Why?”
“Please.”
“Okay. Sure. Give me a sec.”
You could hear a chair scraping the floor as he stood up followed by the soft sounds of his footsteps. And then you could hear a door close.
“Okay. I’m literally standing in a supply closet next to two mops.” You heard something rattle on the other end of the line. “I’m pretty sure I just knocked over a bucket. Now…What’s happened? You’re kind of freaking me out.”
You pressed your hand to your mouth, but a broken sob still escaped you.
“Y/N, darling, talk to me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“What are you apologising for? Why are you crying?”
There was a pause.
“Did someone get hurt? Did something break?”
“No.”
“Are you hurt?”
“I don’t know.”
“...You don’t know?”
There was another pause in which you sniffled loudly. You realised you had been twisting your shirt around your fingers so much that it hurt.
“No.”
“Tell me what’s going on, please. Talk to me.”
“I took a pregnancy test. Or… more than one. Four.”
“...And?”
"They're all… positive. Like all of them.”
Another pause.
“Okay…Wow.”
“Okay?!”
“Yeah.”
“That’s all you’ve got?”
“I’m trying to think before I speak.”
“Promise you won’t tell him.”
Silence.
“You haven’t told him?”
“I haven’t told anyone.”
“Wow… okay. I - I don’t know what…”
“Nicholas. Promise me.”
“I promise.” His voice had become softer. That soft spoken, kind voice that you had relied on so many times before. You knew that you could trust him. You let out a breath you hadn’t realised you were holding.
“Nick I… I didn’t mean to. I don’t know what to do.”
You could hear rustling on his side of the phone.
“Nick?”
“I’m here. I just sat down on the floor.”
And for a second, you could feel a small smile creep onto your lips. The thought of your friend sitting on the floor in a supply closet whilst being the only other person that knew suddenly felt surreal.
“We never talked about it. About… this. What if he doesn’t want them? What if I’ve just ruined everything?” You traced the sides of the test with your thumb. “And what about the band? I -”
He cut you off. “What about the band?”
“What if this is the end of it?”
“Are you happy?”
“What?”
“Are. You. Happy?”
You didn’t know what to say. You lifted your gaze to try to focus on anything at all. It landed on the toothbrush cup. Yours looked so alone. In your mind's eye you could see it alongside Noah’s and a teeny, tiny one.
“I think I am, yeah.” Saying it out loud felt like it cemented something in you, and it absolutely terrified you. “But the band is -”
“Can I tell you what I think?”
You couldn’t find the words, so Nick took your silence as permission to continue.
“I think you’re trying to solve six months worth of problems in six minutes.” There was another rustling on the other side of the line. “Right now there are only two things that we know are true. You’re pregnant. And Noah doesn’t know.”
“Right…”
“Everything else you’re fixated on now is just your brain trying to outrun the future.”
“But I-”
“No.”
“But the timing-”
“It’s very normal to have children in your late twenties to early thirties you know. Especially when you’ve been together for as long as you have.”
You sigh.
“Yeah… In the normal world maybe. But in the band world it feels so early. Like a teenage pregnancy.”
“Stop.”
“It does though Nick!”
“A lot of band dudes have kids, you know.”
No good answer came to mind. He was right, of course. But it just felt different when the band dude in question was your boyfriend.
“And if I can say something else…” It wasn't a question. “If Noah had to choose between a sold out arena and you; he’d hate that you think there even is a choice to make. I’ve watched that man cancel interviews because you had a bad day. I’ve watched him leave tour parties early because he wanted to call you. I’ve watched him stare at his phone waiting for you to wake up. Trust me; you’re not competing with the band.”
You didn’t know what to say. You hated that he was making sense.
“So… as far as I’m concerned there's only one thing left for us to do...”
“...I need to talk to Noah.” You finished the sentence for him.
“Yeah. As soon as possible.” There was a sudden hard clunk.
“What was that?”
“I might’ve knocked another bucket over.”
Despite yourself, you couldn't help letting out a laugh between your sniffles. For the first time since taking the first test, you felt that things might work themselves out.
“There she is,” Nick said quietly.
“What?”
“I’ve been waiting to hear that.”
“Stop.”
“Well… I’ll tell you something… I definitely wasn’t expecting that today.”
“Neither did I, to be fair.”
He laughed. “I’m gonna be honest with you… I think I just cried a little. I cried a little sitting next to two mops.”
Maybe, just maybe… Everything wasn’t falling apart after all.
---
Tags: @platespaghetti @copper-locks @mrslumi @itsfarbettertolearn @thedeathofpeaceofmymind @dyingtol0ve @runningincircl3s
──⋆✦ 𝑺𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍 𝑪𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝑺𝒆𝒕𝒔 -
𝘔𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘷 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘣𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘴.
𝘔𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘣𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.
PURPLE BEIGE - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 💜
BLACK & WHITE (Purple Beige Recolored) - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵🏁
DARK BLUE GREY - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 💙
GREEN CREAM - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 (𝑵𝒆𝒘)
BROWN CREAM GOLD - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 🤎
ORANGE CREAM - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵
BLOOD RED BEIGE - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 💋
PASTEL PINK (Blood Red recolored) - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 🩷
PINK CREAM - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 💕
MONOCHROME DIVIDERS - 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘚𝘦𝘵 (𝑵𝒆𝒘) 🖤🤍
.
ㄑ𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘨 @uzmacchiato 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵.
✦ 𝘉𝘈𝘊𝘒 𝘛𝘖 𝘋𝘐𝘝𝘐𝘋𝘌𝘙 𝘔𝘈𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙𝘓𝘐𝘚𝘛 ✦
𝙊𝙣𝙚 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙚𝙮𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙣
Vampire!Noah x Reader x Vampire!Jolly
Tags: vampires, blood drinking, slight mind control, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), boys kissing, cuddling, purring, adorable fledgeling!noah, he's also a little subby :3
6.7k words
“I thought that we agreed not to scare away our guests.” Noah leaps back from you, his hands letting go as if he were burnt. You hastily scramble back, your body reacting on impulse—it’s more than happy to gain some distance between the two of you. “There’s no need to be afraid, my dear. Noah tends to get a little bit ahead of himself sometimes.” or You become the very willing victim of two bloodthirsty, lusting vampires.
A/N: it’s finally here, after a month and a half of working on it!! shoutout @jestersnotebook for creating the brainworm that is vampire!Noah and his purring. Also there’s a small amount of mindfuckery in this but generally the reader is happily consenting to everything. Just to make it clear.
After buying you a few drinks, he tells you that his name is Noah, and that he’s looking for company for the night. He certainly is charming—complimenting your dress, your hair, your makeup—focusing on the little details that you thought no one would notice. You quickly become enamoured by him, as the two of you share stories from your lives. Conversing feels easy, familiar—as if you are talking to an old friend.
“I don’t live far from here, if you don’t mind walking?”
You don’t even hesitate before agreeing. You don’t want to imagine this night ending. Something tells you that once you part ways, you’ll never see him again. You’re not quite sure what the night holds, but you certainly want to find out.
He has a certain feeling about him. There’s a certain aura that emanates from him. You have an inkling of why that is—but you want to find out more. You know what you’re getting yourself into, and you can’t stop yourself.
He leads you to what looks to be a very cosy home from the outside. It’s a little bit surpising—you were expecting some sort of grand, dilapidated mansion. As he unlocks the door, you can’t help the shiver of anticipation that runs through you.
You barely make it inside before Noah decides that he can’t hold back anymore.
He leaves a soft kiss along the pulse point of your neck, and you can't help but let out a slight moan at the touch. His lips feel so cold against you, but they do nothing to soothe the ache that’s beginning to settle deep inside of you.
His grip on you is tight, his fangs grazing along your neck. There’s a deep-rooted fear lacing with dread inside of you—yet you can’t help but want to sink deeper into his touch, let yourself go, hand yourself over to his primal desires. You’re practically shaking in his grip, fear and arousal manifesting in a loss of control over your own body. There’s something inside of you screaming at you to get away—yet you ignore it. Every nerve and bone in your body is set alight, telling you to run to safety. You don’t listen. You let yourself sink deeper into his control.
Your eyes drift shut, as you brace yourself for whatever is to come.
“I thought that we agreed not to scare away our guests.”
Noah leaps back from you, his hands letting go as if he were burnt. You hastily scramble back, your body reacting on impulse—it’s more than happy to gain some distance between the two of you.
“There’s no need to be afraid, my dear. Noah tends to get a little bit ahead of himself sometimes.”
The man approaches Noah, setting his hands on his shoulders, holding him in place. Noah rolls his eyes, and it almost makes you laugh. Almost. The undercurrent of fear thrumming through you is what prevents it. If you were scared before, you’re terrified now.
“How rude of me not to introduce myself. My name is Joakim.”
You stay unmoving, not entirely convinced by what is happening.
“Little fledgeling, I thought we had agreed on how to treat our guests, hmm?”
Joakim doesn’t seem mad—just more so amused.
“I wasn’t—I wasn’t going to do anything,” Noah insists.
“Mmm, I’m not so sure about that. You both seemed to be enjoying yourselves, at least as far as I could tell.”
Now that your heart has had a chance to calm itself, you fully take in this ‘Joakim’ figure. Though he’s not as tall as Noah, he’s certainly imposing in his own way. He’s dressed in all black, much like Noah—adorning black slacks and a black button-up shirt. His hair is much longer though, flowing down his back, with the rest of it tied up into a small bun. He looks visibly older than Noah—though you're not quite sure by how much.
You remain unmoving, despite Joakim’s little comment. He lets go of Noah, approaching you, intrigued. You walk backwards until your back hits the wall. He follows after you, a slight smile evident on his lips.
You’re trapped.
Despite the fear that’s screaming to be acknowledged, you don’t run. There’s a part of you that’s simply waiting, itching to be violated, consumed, ruined. That part of you is currently winning when it comes to your decision making.
“Are you intoxicated, my dear?” Joakim asks, reaching out and tilting your chin in order to get a better look at your eyes.
You shiver at the touch. You don’t dare to flinch away. There’s something that’s making you want to melt right against him. His touch emanates a sense of safety, and his tone of voice only serves to soothe you further. You can feel yourself sinking deeper, surrendering to him. You try to look away—but you can’t.
“A little bit,” you admit. You only feel the tiniest bit tipsy, but something tells you not to lie to him.
Joakim sighs. You shrink, before he reassures you.
“It’s not your fault. Noah here shouldn’t have bought you any drinks. I really don’t know what he was trying to achieve,” Joakim rolls his eyes and sighs once more. “We have rules, you know,” he shoots in Noah’s direction. “You’ll have to be punished, but all in due time.”
Noah looks down at the ground, head hung low. He’s become the complete opposite of the person that initially seduced you. He seems to have become a shy, obedient thing in the wake of Joakim’s presence. Their dynamic is so strange. It really makes you wonder what exactly their relationship is.
Joakim turns to you. “Growing pains. He’s only been turned fairly recently—well, at least for our standards. He’s still learning,” he explains as he lifts Noah's head by the chin, gently tucking a strand of hair that’s fallen free behind his ear. Noah seems to sink into his touch, similar to the way that you had ached to do.
You’re not really sure what to make of all of this.
Joakim turns to you, reaching a hand out. You hesitantly grasp it, interlacing your fingers with his. You’re not quite sure what exactly pushes you to do that. Your body moves on autopilot, driven by a desire that you can’t quite seem to control. His thumb traces little circles into your hand. It’s awfully soothing—even though it really shouldn't be.
“Now, my dear, let me do this the proper way. Would you like to join us tonight?”
You nod eagerly, eyes widening at the prospect. Your initial fear seems to have fled to the back of your mind. It’s nowhere to be found. Your brain is no longer screaming at you to get away—it seems to have been silenced.
“Words, sweet thing. I need to know that this is something that you want.”
“Yes. Please.”
Joakim nods. He turns to Noah. “Come, fledgeling. We have much to discuss tonight.”
Still holding you by the hand, he brings you through a set of solid, wooden double doors, into what seems like some sort of parlour. The intricate wooden furniture here seems to almost be centuries old—beautiful, intricate patterns woven into the grain of the dark oak wood. There’s a massive window on one end of the room—though it’s partially obscured by a heavy curtain.
Joakim leads you to sit down on one end of an L-shaped couch. There’s a small ache in your chest that makes itself known once he lets go of your hand.
You make yourself comfortable on the couch. You can’t help but admit that the room feels strangely comforting.
“Would you like something to drink?”
“Some water would be nice.”
Joakim sends Noah off to retrieve some. Joakim sits down on the opposite side of the couch, keeping a distance between the two of you. You’re grateful for it, but simultaneously there’s a part of you that aches to reach out for him. Though there’s something about his presence that simply draws you in, you can’t help but feel a little bit suffocated by it. It’s almost like you can’t think straight when he’s close to you.
Noah soon returns with a pitcher of water and some glasses, setting them down on the coffee table, before pouring some for each of you.
“Please, try to sober up, my dear. I don’t intend to do anything while you’re still intoxicated.”
You nod, taking a sip of water and willing your hands to stop shaking. You don’t really feel drunk anymore—at least not from the alcohol. Joakim’s presence in itself makes you feel intoxicated in a certain way. It’s certainly stronger than any form of liquor.
Joakim looks at Noah and softly pats his lap. Noah then joins him. He lies down on the couch, with his head resting in Joakim’s lap. He seems to instantly relax, sinking into the couch. It’s the antithesis of his earlier behaviour.
You feel a need to fill the silence. It’s stifling, and it feels like the longer they’re silent, the more out of control you feel. You can feel Joakim’s stare, silently reading you.
“Joakim,” you say, testing how the word feels in your mouth. “That’s a bit of a strange name.”
He laughs. “You can call me Jolly, if you prefer. I don’t mind.”
You nod.
“So, do tell me how you and Noah ended up here in the first place. I was quite surprised to see that he had brought a guest over without my prior consent.”
“You weren’t meant to be home,” Noah mumbles.
You can’t help but look at Noah then. While he’s laying on Jolly’s lap, his head is tilted to the side—towards your direction. You briefly make eye contact with him, before blushing and looking away. He’s got such a sweet expression on his face that you ache to look back at him.
Jolly shakes his head, letting out a small sigh. “I really do apologize for his behaviour. I promise that he didn’t have bad intentions. He’s still learning, I’m afraid—and I shouldn’t have trusted that he would be okay on his own.”
You nod. “I—despite everything, I still felt like I could trust him,” you admit.
Jolly nods. “It’s not exactly a manipulation thing, but some vampires can almost…radiate their intentions? He wasn’t going to truly hurt you, and he certainly wouldn’t have killed you. It was his way of reassuring you, I suppose. It can feel a little overwhelming when it happens.”
Looking back, it’s hard to imagine that the man currently curled up on the couch, with his head in Jolly’s lap, was the one that seemed to have some sort of power to manipulate your conciousness. He currently looks like a sweet little thing, tired and defenceless, putting all of his trust in Jolly. It’s almost endearing—but there’s too many thoughts racing through your mind to allow you to focus on that.
“Do you have any other…powers?” You ask.
“I can’t really read your mind, if that’s what you’re wondering, but I can read your feelings. I can get a general idea of what emotions you’re feeling. So can Noah.”
“That’s…interesting.”
Jolly makes a noise of agreement. “For example, I know that right now, you’re feeling a little bit nervous. But still—you’re curious. Would that be correct?”
You nod, looking down at your lap. It’s scary to feel so seen. You’re not used to someone being able to read you so easily.
“That’s okay, darling. There’s no need to be shy.” Jolly says softly.
He seems to not want to disturb Noah—he’s been keeping a watchful eye on him throughout this whole conversation. His hand cards through Noah’s hair, gently scratching his scalp. Noah’s eyes are shut, and his breaths are coming out slow and steady. He's clearly coming down from a high, and it's taking a lot out of him. The prospect of having you all to himself, away from Jolly’s careful watch, was clearly a lot for him to handle.
“Have you and Noah known each other long?”
“I found him a few weeks after he had been turned. I had heard of a vampire going on a rampage—violently murdering people in ways that a vampire usually wouldn't. Newly turned vampires don't get their fangs until the next full moon—so they have to resort to other methods of getting blood. Usually, their sire feeds them, but in Noah's case, he was left all alone.”
“Oh.” You can’t hide the fact that your chest aches a little bit at the thought.
“I managed to track him down with the intention of killing him, but decided to take him in instead. He's learnt a lot since then. I've tried my best to take care of him. Somewhere along the way, we fell for each other," he explains, voice softening, still petting Noah's hair.
You nod. “He doesn’t look dangerous,” you admit.
“Right? It’s hard to believe that it was him. But a vampire turned him, and left him to fend for himself. It’s no wonder that he succumbed to his desires. There was no one there to teach him how to safely feed, how to do so without the loss of human lives. Not to mention the fact that he couldn’t even feed properly if he wanted to—since he didn’t have fangs yet. He was left alone, scared and confused. He was in a horrible state when I first found him—barely holding onto his own life. Poor thing’s been through a lot.”
You look down at the curled-up creature in Jolly’s lap, and your heart aches for him. You can’t deny that right now, he looks adorably defenceless and innocent. He must give the impression of a wet little puppy when he’s sad.
You almost stop yourself, but curiosity gets the better of you. “How do you do it, then? Feed, I mean?”
Jolly can’t suppress the indulgent smile that your question brings. “Willing participants, almost like yourself—though usually they’re told exactly what their purpose is. Noah really shouldn’t have done what he did with you.”
You shake your head. “Honestly, I knew what I was getting myself into. I could feel the danger—but I still chased after it.”
“That’s normal. Like I said, Noah didn’t have any bad intentions. If I hadn’t been home to stop him, not much would have happened. I’m sure you would have left here satisfied—though most likely questioning whether you had truly wanted what had happened.”
You nod. The implication of Noah having his way with you makes you clench your thighs, a slight shiver running through you.
“You can be honest with me, it’s okay. I’m hoping that you can find yourself to trust me.”
“I do,” you admit. “There’s just something about you that makes me feel like I can trust you. Even though I don’t know you, even though you could clearly hurt me if you wanted to.”
“Is that something that you don’t want? Being hurt?”
“I—I don’t know. I could feel Noah’s fangs against my neck, earlier—but I still submitted to him. It’s almost like my body wanted it.”
Jolly pauses. “That’s not uncommon. Most people yearn to feel danger in a controlled environment—and that’s exactly what that was. Though Noah technically posed a sense of danger, you were still safe with him.”
You sit there, mulling over your thoughts. You suppose that he’s right.
“What’s—what’s going to happen now?” You ask, swallowing.
“Whatever you want, really. You’re the one in charge here. You can ask more questions, and I’d be happy to explain more to you. You can leave here and we can pretend that this never happened.” Jolly’s voice drops just the slightest bit. “Or, you can stay here and we can see how this could play out.”
You swallow. “If this does ‘play out’, then how would it go?”
“For a start, you could sit a little closer to me, maybe cuddle up a little bit. It’ll help me get a better grasp on how you’re feeling.”
His offer is open-ended. He doesn’t force or coax you.
You take in a deep breath, steering yourself. You shyly inch forward, scooting along the couch until you’re nearly touching him. Being so close to him feels so overwhelming. The sheer presence of him floods your senses. There’s a quick thought of ‘I want to be consumed by him’ that you can’t really suppress.
“You’re such a nervous little thing, it really is adorable. It’s so clear that you want this—yet you’re nervous about how exactly to go about it.”
“I can’t help it,” you whisper.
“I know, and that’s what makes you so adorable,” he says, looking at you with something akin to fondness. “Do you want to come a little bit closer? Rest your head on my shoulder, dear. Allow yourself to relax.”
You do as he says, and you can’t help but sink against him. The second your skin meets his, it’s like an overwhelming sense of calmness washes over you. It feels like your head almost goes blank for a moment, all of your problems and worries fading away. You let out a small sigh.
“Would you like to pet Noah a little bit? He pretends to act all tough, but he loves attention. He’s like an affectionate little kitten.”
You reach your hand out, hesitantly resting it on Noah’s head. You’re not quite sure if he’s asleep or just resting his eyes—but either way he moves his head in your direction, bumping it against your hand. He makes a little noise of affection that you can’t quite describe. It seems that your touch is very much appreciated.
“He’s so different to how he was earlier,” you can’t help but muse. Your voice comes out a little bit drowsy, but you can’t control it.
Jolly’s voice is undoubtedly fond when he speaks of Noah. “The idea of having an entire human to himself was a lot to take in, I suppose. He’s someone that feels emotions very intensely, so he’s crashing from a little bit of an emotional high right now. It’s a common thing for him. I’ve learned how to take care of him when he’s like this. Usually, he just needs some time to decompress, and a little bit of affection.”
“You seem like you really care for him. A lot,” you say, as you card your hand through Noah’s hair.
“I do. I really do.”
You hear a slight rumbling noise coming from Noah, as he tries to nuzzle his face into your hand. You move your hand a little bit, affectionately scratching his chin. “Is he… purring?”
Jolly snorts at that. “Yes. He does that sometimes. He’s completely in control of it—which means that he wants to say that he really appreciates your attention right now.”
You can’t help but coo at Noah. “You’re so sweet,” you comment. Usually, you’d be too shy to indulge in something like this, but your brain acts on impulse. Noah makes a soft noise in his throat in response.
“I really love when he gets all obedient like this. He’s the cutest when he’s pliant,” Jolly comments.
Noah seems to be becoming more cognizant, letting out little noises after everything that you and Jolly say. Eventually, his eyes blink open, and they meet yours. It makes your heart stop for a second. His wide, brown eyes meet yours, slightly glazed over yet still staring at you with an adoration that you can’t quite place. He nuzzles his face into Jolly’s thigh, letting out another wave of purrs. It’s so awfully endearing.
You keep petting Noah, though you can’t deny that you’re already thinking ahead. Your mind is racing, wondering how it’ll feel to finally have Jolly’s fangs sink into your neck. You can’t help but clench your thighs at the thought.
“Getting a little bit excited, hmm?” Jolly teases, placing two fingers underneath your chin and gently moving your head so that you’re looking at him.
You notice that his eyes appear much darker than before. You can’t look away. Though you feel safe in his hands, you can’t help but also feel a little bit like his prey. You won’t deny that the thought excites you.
Jolly gives you a hungry grin, and your eyes are immediately drawn to his fangs. You can’t help the shiver that runs through you. Something inside of you screams that it wants you to be consumed.
You barely register Jolly’s soft suggestion before you’re subconsciously moving. You reposition yourself until you’re sitting between Jolly’s legs, your back to his chest. Noah’s head now rests in your lap—a fact that you’re reminded of when he presses his face against you and lightly traces his fangs along your thigh. It takes all of your self restraint to not buck into his touch.
Jolly noses against your neck, and you can’t help the shiver that runs through you. “It’s important that you relax, sweet thing. It can get easy for your head to spiral when this happens. It's best to allow your body to submit. I promise that I’ll take care of you,” Jolly soothes.
One of his hands finds your hip, rubbing comforting circles over the fabric of your dress. You can’t help but ache for more. You know that Jolly is simply trying to comfort you—yet you can’t help but think of his fingers in a more lewd scenario. You can feel how you’re soaking your panties—and yet you don’t feel the slightest hint of shame.
Jolly leans in and gently nips at your earlobe. You can’t even stifle the gasp that escapes you.
“Please,” you whisper.
“Please, what, my dear?”
“Please touch me,” you gasp. It’s barely audible.
Jolly’s smile is practically predatory. He slowly guides your dress up until it’s bunched around your waist. He trails his fingers against your soft tummy, letting out a hum of appreciation. You can’t help but flinch at his initial touch. His hands are so cold.
Once he’s done admiring the softness of your skin, he keeps his hand there. His arm is now resting across your stomach, keeping you bracketed against him. His other hand then begins to wander further down. His fingers trail along the edge of the delicate lace of your panties, threatening to dip beneath the fabric.
“Please,” you beg. Your mind feels so deliciously cloudy due to the teasing touch—all you can think about is your pleasure.
Finally, his fingers trail down your clothed center, the touch featherlight and barely there, his two fingers tracing the outside of your pussy. Still, you arch into his hand—at least as much as the hand that’s wrapped around your waist allows. Jolly effortlessly keeps you close to him, effectively restraining you.
Noah’s head continues to rest on your thigh, and you can’t help but feel deliciously exposed. His eyes are still glazed over and cloudy—though still, he watches as Jolly teases you. Noah looks about as gone as you feel. You’re not quite sure what it is that’s making you feel this way, but it’s affecting Noah too.
“You’re so wet,” Jolly hums appreciatively, as his fingers trace along your soaked panties.
Despite Jolly finally providing the stimulation that you had ached for, it still isn’t enough. Feeling his featherlight touch trace along your clothed pussy feels like absolute torture. You need to feel him against you. Desperately.
“I need more. Please,” you can’t help but admit.
Jolly gently traces his hand along your skin, placating you. “Would you like Noah to join in? I’m sure that he’d love to taste that sweet little pussy of yours.”
You nod, albeit still a little shy.
“Words, darling.”
“Please. I need the both of you.”
Jolly hums appreciatively.
“Rest your head on my shoulder, dear.”
You can't help but obey. You lean back into him, letting your body practically go limp in his grasp.
“There we go. Just let yourself relax, sweet thing.”
There’s just something about his words that make you want to blindly follow him, succumb to this temptation that he’s leading you into.
Jolly’s hands continue to stroke your pussy over your panties. It’s so painfully teasing. You just know that he’s taking sick pleasure in feeling how your wetness seeps through the fabric. It seems that he greatly enjoys knowing just how desperate he makes you.
He doesn’t spend too long torturing you, though. Soon, he manages to remove your panties, and you’re left bare. You don’t fail to notice how Noah’s head still lays on your lap, only inches away, his hazed eyes patiently watching your exposed pussy. It should be embarrassing, really—but all it does is send a wave of arousal through you.
Jolly’s fingers brush through your folds, and you can’t even hide your gasp. His fingers—rough and calloused—feel deliciously good when they make direct contact with your centre. He toys with you a little bit, working your clit and then moving to tease your entrance with his fingers. You gasp when his finger pushes in slightly, only to immediately retreat.
“Please,” you beg.
There’s so many things that you want to say, so many things that you want to beg for—yet you can’t. Vocalizing the deep need that is seated inside of you feels impossible. All you can do is hope that Jolly understands your desperate whines and pleas.
You somehow manage to tilt your head in order to look at him. His eyes seem to be blown wide, dark and dangerous. Their hunger should scare you—but it doesn’t. There’s a self-satisfied smile on his face, and you can tell just how much he’s enjoying this. His fangs slightly poke out between his lips, and you can’t deny that they don’t look unbelievably attractive. You’re aching to see how they’ll feel once they fully sink into your neck.
You’re not really sure where that thought comes from.
Still making eye contact with you, Jolly pushes one of his thick fingers into your pussy.
Your eyes drift shut, and you let out a slight moan. You just know that he’s absolutely revelling in how he’s taking you apart.
The stretch feels delicious. His thick finger feels perfect inside of you. You can’t deny that it’s much longer and thicker than your own—and so it seems to perfectly hit the spot inside of you that makes you shake. Jolly takes some time to tease you with his finger, working you open a little bit. Soon, he slides a second finger inside. It feels like a stretch, but it goes in fairly easily. At this point, you’re so wet and desperate that your pussy is willing to accommodate just about anything.
Jolly traces his fangs along your neck, pressing them down just the slightest. It makes you gasp.
“Mmm, I can tell you liked that. Your pussy just got so much tighter around my fingers.”
His words only serve to make you tighten around his fingers even more.
Much to your surprise, Jolly’s actions aren’t desperate or rough. Instead, he slowly works your pussy, gently but intentionally moving his fingers. You weren’t initially sure if this would be enough for you—but soon enough, you feel your orgasm approaching.
Just as you feel like you’re about to cum, his fingers retreat from your pussy.
“Please,” you gasp, desperately arching your hips. “I need you. Please.”
You’re breathless, body shaking and thrumming with need. You just know that he’s wearing that sadistic smile again.
Wordlessly, he brings his slick-covered fingers in front of him. You can see how he’s admiring them, his tattooed fingers glistening with your pleasure. His hum of appreciation doesn’t go unnoticed.
He brings his fingers down to Noah’s lips. Momentarily, you’ve forgotten about your own desire. Jolly’s fingers teasingly trace Noah’s lips, spreading your release over them. Noah lets out a little whine, poking his tongue out, only for Jolly to pull his fingers away. You can feel his self-satisfied chuckle. Jolly seems to then take mercy on Noah, sliding his wet fingers into Noah’s mouth. You watch the sight that is Noah licking your slick off of Jolly’s fingers. Noah’s eyes are closed, as he appreciatively hums around Jolly’s fingers.
“Do you want to help make our girl feel good?” Jolly prompts.
The possessive pronoun sends a shiver through you. You know that you’re probably overthinking it, but it makes you feel like you’re their little toy, their little plaything to do with as they please.
Noah nods eagerly, though he still seems to be a little bit tired and not quite present. He slowly inches towards your pussy, lifting his head from your lap. He gives your pussy a hesitant lick, and you have to restrain yourself from bucking your hips into his face.
He gently works you, slowly licking through your folds. He seems desperate to taste you, and you can’t ignore the little noises and appreciative hums that he makes. He’s slow, but enthusiastic—taking his time to appreciate and worship you.
You can’t help but notice how Jolly's fangs scrape along the skin of your neck. Though you shiver at the light pain and the promise that it brings, you can't help but arch into it. The slight suspense keeps you on your toes, as you’re left to wonder when Jolly will finally sink his fangs into you.
“It’s okay. Lean your head against my shoulder. Let yourself relax.”
His tone of voice is soft yet firm, gently guiding you. You can’t help but succumb to his words. You let your eyes drift shut, and you allow yourself to sink into his hold. A feeling of complete acceptance and submission flows through you, and you can’t seem to resist it.
Jolly’s arm tightens slightly around your waist in order to stop you from moving as much under Noah’s ministrations. You can’t deny that the feeling of being restrained doesn’t do something to you. Noah doesn’t help the situation—desperately licking at your pussy, his tongue gently pushing at your entrance one moment, licking over your clit the next. He moans into your pussy, so appreciative yet desperate for more. You ache to move, grind against his face, push your hips against him, take control of the moment—yet you can’t. Jolly has you firmly pressed against his body, and there’s nothing that you can do about it. You can’t help but whine at your predicament.
It doesn’t take long for your orgasm to approach. Noah eagerly works you through it, his tongue insistently lapping at your wetness.
You let out a choked gasp as Jolly sinks his fangs into your neck. It’s undoubtedly painful, yet the pain only seems to intensify your orgasm. You get light-headed and forget how to breathe for a moment, until Jolly’s hand gently rubs at the other side of your neck.
You feel so dizzy once Jolly pulls away. Your head nearly falls forward once he lets go, but he manages to catch it. You barely register Jolly gently pulling Noah up, guiding Noah towards him. Their lips meet in a passionate kiss, and you can see some of your blood drip down Jolly’s chin as he feeds it to Noah. Despite everything that’s happened tonight, this is the sight that makes your stomach flutter the most. You watch, through glazed-over eyes as Jolly and Noah hungrily make out, sharing both your blood and your release. The sight is so debauched and lewd that you can’t bring yourself to look away—despite how intimate the moment feels. Noah desperately licks at Jolly’s lips, cleaning off all of the blood there. He keeps his hands to himself, firmly gripped behind his back—the picture of obedience.
Your head goes blank for a moment, before you feel fangs at your neck once more.
You let out a distressed little whine. You barely register Jolly’s cooing and soothing noises, his hand gently rubbing at your hip in order to calm you down a little bit.
You can’t find it in you to resist. You let it happen.
Jolly’s fangs sink into your neck once more. It hurts more than before, without a doubt. There’s no orgasm or pleasure to distract you. You’re left to feel just the pain on its own. Your head feels like it’s spinning. You struggle to hold onto your conciousness—the only thing left to feel is the pain. You close your eyes, letting yourself sink into the acceptance of whatever is happening.
It feels right.
You know that you lose consciousness for a little bit. You’re not sure for how long.
You don’t really know what’s happening anymore, but you can feel someone licking at your neck. Judging by their enthusiasm, it’s most likely Noah. You can feel some warm blood trickle down your neck, but it’s quickly lapped up by him.
They’re talking, but you can’t really make out their words.
You let out a little whine.
“It’s okay, you’re okay. We’ve got you.” Jolly says, gently petting your head. It’s a motion that nearly forces you to relax. Sleepily, you notice that you’re still laying with your back to Jolly’s chest, though you’re nearly laying flat.
“It’s okay, I’ve got you. Let yourself rest,” Jolly coos. His hand gently rubs against your bare thigh, as you notice that Noah throws a blanket over you. He tucks the blanket in around you, before clambering on top of you, his head laying on your chest. There’s a soft look in his eyes that you don’t quite want to analyse just this moment.
You can’t help but let your eyes drift shut. You’re too tired to keep them open. You can feel a slight rumbling on your chest, and somewhere in the back of your mind, you recognise that Noah has begun to purr once again. It’s oddly soothing. It’s what prompts you to fully relax. His weight on you, head resting on your chest, Jolly pressed against your back.
_ _ _ _ _
You wake up, groaning in pain. You’re not quite sure what hurts. It seems to be a bone-deep exhaustion that has sunken into you. You stretch out a little bit—as much as your body allows for—as you recall the events of the previous night. You shiver involuntarily at the thought. You’re laying on the same couch, a soft blanket keeping your body warm. You’re wearing a t-shirt and shorts that most definitely aren’t yours.
The sunlight streams in through gaps in the curtains, blinding you. You press your face into the pillow that's been placed underneath your head, wanting to stay asleep for a little bit longer. You’re not really sure what happens now, and you’d like to delay the inevitable.
Jolly doesn’t give you that mercy.
“Good, you’re awake. How are you feeling?” He asks. His voice makes you jump. You hadn’t noticed him. He’s sitting in an armchair in the corner. He places the book that he was reading face-down on the table.
“Fine,” you rasp. “A little bit sore, but I’m okay.”
You try your best to sit up, but you soon find out that your arms are too weak to support yourself.
“What the fuck…”
“Don’t worry about it, that’s normal. Your body is still a bit weak after losing so much blood. You’ll be okay fairly soon, though.”
You sigh, dropping your head into the pillow and letting out a slight groan.
There’s a quiet knock on the door, before it opens. “She awake?” Noah asks, stepping into the room.
He smiles so brightly when he lays his eyes on you.
You notice that he’s carrying a plate and a mug. He approaches you, setting them down on the coffee table. He brings up a footstool, sitting down on it beside you.
“Probably should have made you eat something last night, but you were pretty out of it,” he smiles sheepishly. It’s so adorably endearing. “Do you want to try sitting up for me?”
You nod, and Noah helps you get into position. Your body seems to still be fairly useless and uncooperative.
Noah is so soft and patient, it really is adorable. It’s nice to see what he’s like, especially after he was so out of it last night.
“You seem to be a lot more present today,” you can’t help but comment.
Noah nods. “Sometimes I get a little bit tired and overwhelmed. My brain just shuts down. That’s what happened last night.”
You notice that Jolly seems to be watching the two of you, a small smile on his face. His sense of approval makes you feel good.
“Is it okay if I feed you?” Noah asks hesitantly. It’s adorable how nervous he is—ironic comparing how just confident was when he was chatting you up last night.
You nod. You’re absolutely starving, and it doesn’t look like you’ll be able to feed yourself anytime soon.
“Sweet boy spent his time making breakfast for you,” Jolly adds, the beginnings of a fond smile on his face.
The blush that spreads over Noah’s face is so pretty.
Noah places the plate on his lap, and takes his time feeding you. There’s some warm, buttered toast, along with various fruit that he’s sliced up. The fruit is so deliciously sweet.
“It’s from our back garden,” Noah comments, as if reading your thoughts. Which, most likely, he is. “Jolly likes to spend his time gardening.”
You can’t help but giggle at that, the image amusing to you. You make eye contact with Jolly, and he raises an eyebrow at you. You can’t help but erupt into giggles.
“Wait, I thought that vampires couldn’t go out into the sun.”
“That’s an old rumour. Vampires spread it in order to catch people off guard, make them think that they’re safe during the day. Made it easier to find prey, I suppose,” Jolly replies.
Noah asks if you’re thirsty, and he brings the steaming mug up to your mouth. He gently tilts it, letting you take small sips. The tea is still warm and deceptively sweet.
“Too sweet?” Jolly asks, amused, watching your face.
“Just a little bit,” you smile.
“That’s Noah for you. He always adds too much honey.”
“Don’t be mean,” Noah whines.
“It’s okay, I appreciate the sweet treat,” you giggle.
Noah takes his time feeding you the rest of the food. You’re very much grateful for it.
“So am I just stuck here until I can move?”
“Pretty much,” Noah shrugs. “It’s okay though, we don’t mind,” he teases, making a show of running his tongue along his fangs.
Even though it’s a joke, you can’t help the shiver of desire that runs through you.
“Looks like someone enjoys the idea of that,” Noah smirks.
Jolly sighs. “Stop taunting her,” he scolds, though he can’t help his slight smile.
The three of you spend the rest of the day sharing easy conversation. You learn some more about their past. They’re very much happy to answer your questions and entertain your curiosity.
Once you regain your strength, you know that it’s time to head home. The sun has nearly set. You’ve been gone for almost twenty-four hours. Being in their company feels so unbelievably right. You don’t want to leave.
Noah lends you some sweats and a hoodie of his to wear on the way home. You take it, but only after he makes you promise that you’ll come back.
“Just to return them. Obviously. No other reason,” he blushes.
There’s a tight feeling in your chest. You can’t explain why, but your body screams at you to not leave. It feels like your heart physically breaks once you leave their house.
Taglist: @theservantbones @itsfarbettertolearn @pipidoll @lacy1986 @fadingangelwisp @concretejunglefm @oobleoob @english-fucker @ethelsbaby @sallyba3 @111amyyy @findinggodb3for3godfindsm3 @darksigns-exe @sleepycactus-offering @branika182 @nogoodsailors
Dividers: @/silent-stories
✨✨ masterpiece ✨✨
cw: 18 + 𝖒𝖉𝖓𝖎. ruffilo’s sister!reader, brothers bestfriend trope, slow burn, first kiss, fluff, a little hurt/comfort, kissing, yearning, mention of cheating, light grinding.
wc: 4.2k
an: this has been in my drafts for so long that i just needed to get it out 🫣 inspired by an anon who suggested a ruffilo sister!reader, who always hooks up with noah whenever they’re in town, and this is essentially the ‘start’ to that idea. may expand on said hookups in the future for now pls enjoy a little slow burn thing <3
You’ll always remember the first time you saw Noah. When your eyes landed on this lanky, scrappy looking guy with the cutest face and a smile to match, overbite prominent, even when he talked.
He’s hanging out with your brother, Nicholas, the first time you meet him. The two of them are playing their guitars when you poke your head into Nick’s room, ignoring the big ‘knock before entering’ sign. That’s for your parents, not annoying younger siblings, though the two of you barely fight. The moment you peek inside, the playing stops. Noah is the one who looks up first, his expression somewhere between curiosity and amusement before the corner of his mouth quirks upward.
You ignore the fact that Nick has already called over to you, distracted by the obvious—a cute boy in your house.
“Hey! Was there something you needed?” Nick asks. He doesn’t sound mad, maybe just a little irritated you’ve ignored him, but at least he hasn’t thrown a pillow at you this time.
You shake your head, snapping out of your daydream, certain there’d be cartoon birds and hearts around your head if you dared to stare any longer.
“Oh, yeah. Mom says dinner’s ready, and there’s even some for your little friend.”
“Noah,” he cuts in, introducing himself. You lift your hand from where it clings to the doorframe and give him a small wave.
“Meet my pain in the ass sister,” Nick says.
You stick your tongue out in defiance. “I’m not a pain in the ass,” you huff.
Nick chuckles, but it’s Noah who pipes up, setting his guitar down.
“That’s what a pain in the ass would say.”
“Whatever.” You roll your eyes and push away from the door, heading off toward the bathroom to wash up for dinner, and admittedly to change into a shirt that feels less teenager and more desirable, not that it’s going to make any difference.
At dinner, you learn Noah is the same age as you, and that he’s into music just as much as Nick is—if not more, by mentioning that he’s in a band. You ooh and ahh, twirling your hair around your finger in a way that, when you look back years later, will make you cringe, but Noah just laughs and smiles at you.
During the meal, you notice him fidgeting like he’s nervous, and you briefly consider offering a comforting hand. Friendly, sure, but maybe too forward for someone you’ve just met. Instead, you give him an encouraging smile before leaning forward to look past him at Nick.
“Nicky, can we play Smash Bros after this?”
“You have Smash Bros?” Noah asks, eyebrows raised.
“Oh yeah! We can all play after dinner.”
“As long as you both clean up,” your mom cuts in. You and Nick agree with reluctant grumbles.
After dinner, the two of you help clear the table, Noah offering to help, too, before all three of you run upstairs to Nick’s room, where he sets up the game. You lose every round, spending most of the time button mashing, but you’re highly entertained watching the two of them play, especially Noah. You quietly admire him, your heart fluttering each time he glances your way and invites you to play another round.
It becomes routine, something the three of you fall into almost every time Noah comes over, which is nearly every day after school. Until one day, you just stop showing up.
“Where’s your sister?” Noah asks, glancing at the empty spot in Nick’s room where you usually sit waiting for your turn, sneaking looks at him when you think he’s not paying attention.
It’s been a few weeks now since Noah’s seen you at home, not that he’s been counting—almost five.
“I dunno.” Nick shrugs, eyes locked on the screen, fingers tapping over the buttons as he follows his character. “Out with that Jake guy, I think.”
Noah tries not to react, but there’s a faint grind of teeth, a flicker of indignation. He knows about you dating some preppy guy from school—blonde, muscular, on the football team. The complete opposite of him. Not someone he would’ve ever pictured you with.
He couldn’t help the pang of jealousy the first time he saw you talking to Jake. At first, he assumed it was just a quick conversation, maybe you were sending him on his way, only to now find out you’ve been spending nearly all your free time with Jake instead of here, with him and Nick.
That pang only sharpens later that night when he logs onto MySpace. Clicking over to your profile, he finds he’s been bumped from his spot in your top four, relegated to the second row, replaced.
The weeks you spend dating Jake feel long and agonizing. Noah sees you less and less outside of school, and even inside, it’s usually only in passing—in the hallways, or occasionally at lunch. His own habit of ditching to hang out with Nick at the tattoo shop downtown doesn’t help.
There are still the occasional texts exchanged, but nothing more, and all the while, Noah feels like he’s watching you from a distance, pining for something he’s starting to believe will never be his.
“You should come,” Nick insists, glancing over from his little work station while Noah flips through the latest Kerrang! magazine.
“What? To your sister’s party? You really think she’s gonna want either of us there?”
“Technically she only wants me because I can buy the alcohol. And she’d want you there because, well—you’re her friend.”
Something about that word doesn’t sit right with Noah. It never felt like you and he were just friends. Maybe briefly, but now it feels less like that and more like he’s just some guy nursing an unrequited crush. Being around you only opens the door for heartbreak.
If Nick has ever suspected anything, he’s never said so, never tried to warn him off when it came to you. Honestly, Noah doesn’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.
“Is she still with that dude?” he asks, unable to keep the irritation out of his tone.
“Jake?” Nick glances up before continuing. “I think so. I know he’s coming.”
There’s a pause. Noah weighs the idea of going, eyes narrowing at the magazine in his hands. His brows are drawn together in a distinct furrow, but Nick only casts him a quick look before turning back to his work.
“C’mon, dude. It’s her nineteenth. It’s only gonna happen once.”
“Yeah, I guess.” Noah rubs the back of his neck with a slight huff, then nods. “Fine. But if it gets too dull, I’m going home.”
“Whatever you say.” Nick lifts his hands in mock surrender, but Noah swears he sees the unmistakable twitch of a grin at the corner of his mouth.
The party is exactly as expected: most of your friends, a couple of Nick’s friends who you know by extension, and then there’s Noah.
The sight of him both surprises and pleases you the moment you step off the bottom stair just as he’s coming through the door, the height difference between you more noticeable than ever.
“Hi…” Your features soften, and Noah greets you with a warm smile and an open arm for a hug. You step into it without thinking, wrapping your arms around his lean frame, tucking yourself close. It’s been far too long since you last saw him, and you can’t help nuzzling into his chest, especially when his chin dips against the top of your head and he murmurs, low and fond, “There she is. The birthday girl.”
The words make your stomach flutter with butterflies, and there’s a twinge of guilt, because in all the time you’ve been with Jake, you’ve never felt that. In fact, you’d only agreed to a date with Jake all those months ago in hopes of forgetting Noah, but instead, you’ve only found yourself longing for him more. No matter how much distance you’ve tried to put between you, he’s still there in your mind.
“It’s been too long,” he says, pulling back to look down at you. “I’d accuse you of purposely hiding from me if I didn’t know any better.”
You laugh, but there’s a faint quiver in it, nerves maybe, because his words are too close to the truth.
“Sorry. I’ve been busy.”
“So I hear. A boyfriend, huh?”
If he’s hurt, nothing in his face gives it away. Maybe, deep down, you’d been hoping he would be, hoping for some sign that he likes you as much as you like him.
“Yeah…”
“How’s it going?”
“Good.” You nod, though not convincingly. It’s not easy dating the guy who’s considered to be pretty and popular, especially with the kind of attention he gets from other girls.
Suddenly there’s a loud crash from somewhere behind you, followed by cheers. You roll your eyes with a huff.
“Will you excuse me?”
You brush past him, quietly thankful for the excuse to escape the guaranteed awkwardness of this conversation, and silently praying that nothing important just got broken.
“How’d that go?” Nick’s voice comes from behind him, and Noah turns with a shrug.
“Good. Why wouldn’t it?”
“Because it’s felt like you’ve both been avoiding each other for months now.” Nick raises a brow, almost conspiratorially, and whatever idea he’s got in his head, he might not be entirely wrong.
“It’s nothing.” Noah shakes his head. Nick just sighs before offering him a beer.
“If anyone asks—”
“No idea where these came from.”
They share a brief, amused grin before Noah takes a swig and slips off into the small crowd, finding somewhere to settle and falls into conversation with some of Nick’s other friends who came over for the festivities.
“What are you doing out here all on your own?” Noah asks when he spots you sitting on the bench swing at the back of the empty garden.
He’s stepped out for some fresh air, the music from inside the house still booming but growing distant as he approaches. He catches the quick brush of your hand against your cheek before taking a seat beside you with a quiet sigh.
“Let me guess—‘It’s your party and you’ll cry if you want to’?” His tone is teasing, earning a halfhearted laugh from you.
“Idiot,” you mumble under your breath.
He leans in, giving you a light nudge. “Why are you out here alone and crying?”
You freeze at the last word, exhaling slowly before answering. “Because this is the worst possible birthday.”
“Why?” It comes out quicker than he means, but he’s not trying to pry, he just cares.
Through muffled sobs, he catches the words Jake and some girl up in your room. Noah’s jaw tightens, teeth grinding, blood boiling at the thought of what he could, and would happily, do if he got his hands on him. His arm slips around you, pulling you against him in comfort. You fall into him easily, hiding your face against his shirt as the emotion rolls over you, another wave of tears following.
You never expected things with Jake to be serious, not really, but it still hurts to find him kissing another girl. In your room of all places.
“He never deserved you.” Noah’s voice is soft, but there’s no hiding the truth in it. You’ve always deserved better than some preppy asshole.
You don’t disagree or argue; you just nuzzle closer, his arm tightening as he holds you.
“It’s not midnight yet,” he murmurs. “Your birthday still isn’t over. We can still turn it around.”
“Oh yeah?” You sniffle, lifting your head slightly to look at him as you wipe your eyes. “And how do you plan to do that?”
Instead of answering, Noah reaches out, taking your chin in between his thumb and forefinger, and tilting your head back just enough to lean down and kiss you. It’s soft and tentative at first, barely a brush, before you slowly melt into it, returning it just as delicately, your hand coming up to cup his cheek.
Your chest bursts with emotion, tears welling again, but this time, they’re not from sadness. They’re from happiness. From relief. From finally having an answer to the question you’ve always carried.
Noah more than likes you back.
Nothing more happens that night between you and Noah. In fact, nothing more has happened since. Still, you’ve been spending more time together, hanging out with him and especially his bandmates now that he and Nick have fully formed something solid.
It’s nice, getting to watch them practice in the backroom of some venue that lets them rehearse as long as they clean up afterward. Right now, they’re preparing for an upcoming tour. They’re only the opening act, and it’s a Warped Tour style setup, but you couldn’t be prouder—not just of Nick, but of Noah, remembering that first night, dinner with your family, when he talked about his dreams. Now you’re watching him live them.
While everyone else is clearing up, Noah approaches where you’re sitting at the side of the room. “So, are you going to come watch us play?” Noah asks, leaning back against one of the large equipment cases.
“Didn’t I just?” you tease.
He leans in, nudging you playfully. “You know what I mean.”
Nothing might have happened between you that night, but it doesn’t change the flirting that has started, subtle but undeniable. There’s a whole new undertone to your friendship.
“I told you.”
“Yeah, yeah, you can’t come. But why not just one show?” He gives you the most hopeful look, puppy eyes and all, rocking side to side. He’s been trying for weeks to convince you to join them on the tour. Even Nick has agreed, and your parents have no issue, yet you’re still digging your heels in. Maybe because you know what’ll happen if you go, and the last thing you want is to feel like some unintentional groupie.
“Maybe if you did a show here. Besides, you’ll meet some hot girl on the road and forget all about me.” You brush it off lightly, but his expression shifts, a flicker of genuine hurt crossing his face.
“You really think I’d forget about you like that?” he asks.
He doesn’t deny the pretty girl part, but the way he says those words makes you believe him.
Before either of you can get too caught up in the conversation, Folio—their new official drummer, calls Noah over. Having him around is like having a puppy twenty four seven: younger than all of you, full of relentless energy, but when that energy transfers to the drums, it’s incredible.
Watching Noah fills you with pride, it’s like seeing someone find not only their passion, but their people. Finding a place where he finally belongs.
In Noah’s room, you fall back onto the bed with a soft thud, sprawled across it as Noah drops down beside you. His head turns toward you, and his leg stretches out to gently nudge your side.
“Don’t even try it,” you murmur from beneath the arm draped over your face.
“I wasn’t going to do anything,” he teases, reaching a hand toward you. You can hear the grin in his voice without even looking at him.
“Mhm.” You hum before moving your arm behind your head, glancing over at him. “You’re not going to try and convince me one more time to join you in the back of a minivan with, what, four other dudes?”
“Five,” he corrects.
You roll your eyes, the corner of your mouth quirking with a small grin. “I think I’ll be better at home.”
“Well, I’ll miss you then.”
“I’m sure you’ll survive.”
“Barely.” He scoffs and shuffles closer, resting his chin on your shoulder as he looks at you. For a moment, you linger in silence, gazes locked. You feel the faint brush of his fingers along your side, dipping where the fabric of your shirt rides up.
“Do you ever think about it?” Noah asks at last.
Somehow, you don’t need him to clarify. You have. You do. You find yourself coming back to it more often than you’d like to admit.
You bite down on the corner of your lip and turn your head away, gaze dropping. “Sometimes…” you confess softly.
“All the time,” he breathes.
You turn back, meeting his eyes again just as he leans in. His lips brush yours, soft, just as they had been the first time but when your hand grips the front of his shirt, you’re the one who deepens it, pressing yourself closer. His hand slides down to the small of your back, pulling you flush against him.
“Tell me if you want to stop,” he murmurs between kisses.
“I don’t,” you breathe, chasing his lips once more.
You roll fully onto your back, pulling him with you. The bed creaks beneath you both, his knee sliding up between your thighs, first to part them, then pressing firmly against your jeans. The kiss turns more heated, his tongue slipping into your mouth, and your hips grind down against his thigh. Your hands tangle in his shoulder length hair, grazing his scalp, tugging, a moan spilling out with your desperate rutting.
It’s been years. You’ve had another boyfriend since that first kiss, but nothing sets you alight the way Noah does. He’s been all you’ve thought about, all you’ve craved.
Little do you know, he’s wanted the same, finding you in his thoughts far more often than he’d ever admit.
From downstairs comes the slam of the front door, echoing through the quiet house, followed by the call of, “Noah!”
You’re no longer alone in the sanctuary of his home. Your brother has returned, his sudden arrival causing you and Noah to quickly part, scattering like teenagers expecting to be caught by their parents.
From beyond the bedroom walls, you hear the creak of the stairs and heavy footsteps as Nick takes them two at a time, jogging his way upstairs. By the time he reaches Noah’s room and swings the bedroom door open, you and Noah have put at least a few feet between yourselves. Noah is across the room in the computer chair, spinning idly, while you sit with your back against the wall, facing the TV and flicking through channels in search of something to watch.
“Oh, hey! I didn’t know you were here.” Nick doesn’t bother hiding his surprise, though if he has any suspicions about you hanging out in Noah’s room, he doesn’t let them show.
“I was waiting for you!” Shuffling to the edge of the bed, you stretch before offering Noah the remote and hopping to your feet. “Since you only have a couple more days before you leave me forever—”
“For, like, a few weeks…” Noah interrupts, correcting you.
You continue anyway, pressing a hand dramatically to your chest. “And I’ll be all alone—”
“With our parents,” Nick adds.
“I felt it was only right to have at least one more hangout night.”
Nick's brows knit together as he studies you for a moment, as though internally debating your motives for being here. Eventually, he lets out a long sigh. “I suppose.”
He rolls his eyes playfully, and you scoff, reaching out to smack the front of his shoulder. “Hey! You’ll miss me while you’re gone.”
“More like I’ll miss the peace and quiet while dealing with him and the other guys.” Nick jerks his head toward Noah, who’s stopped spinning and is now staring at the two of you, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.
“What did I do?!”
The guilty look that flashes across Noah’s face sends your own pulse racing before Nick suddenly bursts into laughter. You quickly follow suit, the two of you shaking your heads at Noah while he remains thoroughly confused.
“Come on,” Nick says, pulling the door open. “We’ll go downstairs, order some food, and watch a movie.”
You follow him into the hallway, hearing Noah shuffle after you.
“Fine, but it better not be Lord of the Rings again.”
It is.
At this point, you’ve lost count of the number of times he’s rewatched it alone, let alone with Noah. While your brother sits curled up at one end of the L-shaped couch, you and Noah sit on the same side, close enough that the fingers of your hands resting on the same cushion brush against each other beneath the blanket you’re sharing.
It’s barely a graze, and yet his touch has a way of igniting the same spark in you that it has since that first kiss you shared on your birthday—the same kiss you’ve often fantasized about, daring to wonder what might have become of things back then had you pursued it further.
You’re distracted, enough so that when Nick begins to speak, quoting the movie as he always does, you visibly jump. Your hand pulls away from Noah’s reach, a flash of panic rushing through you at the thought of being caught.
It takes a moment to register that you haven’t been, but instead of sliding your hand back into place, Noah grows bolder. His arm extends until his hand finds the inside of your thigh, the touch no more than a brief stroke before it settles there comfortably, giving a gentle squeeze.
Before he can move any further, you press your thighs together, trapping his hand between them as though holding it hostage. Yet it seems to be exactly where he wants to be, evident in the way his fingers curl slightly against you.
Every movement Nick makes has you holding your breath and squeezing your thighs tighter, though it does little to deter Noah. The constant awareness of his touch is enough to keep your attention fixed anywhere but the movie, your thoughts drifting despite your best efforts to focus on what plays across the screen.
Instead of relaxing, your entire body stiffens. You fear being caught, but you don’t want Noah to stop. If anything, you long to feel his touch against your skin, without the barrier between the heat of his fingers and the puddle he’s turning you into with such a simple act.
The movie feels twice as long, your patience wearing thin, all while knowing there’s no chance of dragging Noah upstairs to his room or finding an opportunity to slip away and continue what had begun between you. Instead, you’re forced to sit with the tension he leaves coiled tight in your stomach, a feeling that only grows as the minutes crawl by.
When the movie finally ends, you drag yourself up from the couch, trailing behind as they both head upstairs. Noah leads closely ahead of you, one hand tucked behind his back, his fingers catching the tips of yours and holding on until you reach the top of the stairs, where you’re forced to split off in opposite directions.
Nick has already disappeared down the hall toward his room. You turn toward the guest room, shoulders slumped, not daring to look back at Noah, only to nearly jump when a hand suddenly catches yours.
Spinning on the spot, you almost collide with Noah. He’s standing close, gazing down at you. His already dark eyes are nearly swallowed by the shadows, illuminated only by the faint glow spilling from the bathroom light farther down the hall.
“Noa—” you breathe, but he gently hushes you, guiding you backward toward the guest room. His free hand reaches behind you to ease the door open as he ushers you over the threshold.
For a second, you simply stand there, your heart pounding in your chest. Your fingers remain encased in his larger hand, his grip tightening briefly before he lets go. He lifts that same hand to your face, his thumb tracing softly along your lower lip as he leans closer.
“I meant what I said earlier.”
Your breath catches.
His lips brush yours as he continues, his voice barely above a whisper.
“I think about that kiss all the time.”
Noah seals his confession with a kiss that leaves your knees weak and sends a shiver racing down your spine. Your head goes pleasantly fuzzy, and for a moment you’re too caught up in him to fully process what’s happening. The gentle pressure of his thumb and forefinger against your chin, the way he tilts your head just enough to keep you close, determined to savour every second.
His touch feels almost searing, surrounded by the scent of him, familiar and comforting all at once, until he’s pulling away.
Silence settles between you in the darkness. Noah’s forehead rests against yours, as though he’s fighting a battle with himself not to stay. The words ‘don’t go’ rise in your throat, only to die there before they can ever reach your lips.
“Goodnight…” he finally says, breaking the silence.
In the same breath, you echo the word back in a whisper.
The reluctance in his departure lingers long after he steps away. The warmth of his touch feels imprinted on your skin, and the scent of him clings to you as he retreats to his own room.
Across the hall, after Noah climbs into bed, he spends the next several minutes tossing and turning before finally going still. Staring up at the ceiling, he eventually drifts off with one simple thought: that wishes he was lying next to you.
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So many fics to read and so little time 💔
i am BEGGING someone to write something abt this rn
𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐃 𝐁𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐀𝐍 - 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄
Pairing: noah x reader (pirates au)
Series summary: Stuck in a life you don’t want, your only way out is a deal with a pirate, and that’s how your journey on a ship of outlaws toward a new life begins.
Tw: some men being creeps, fire, fighting but nothing graphic, feeling pressured to get married
Series mastelist
That morning, you woke more tired than usual, as the first rays of sunlight filtered softly through your window. You tried to recall if you had dreamed something that might explain the feeling, but your mind offered nothing in return.
You didn’t move for a while, staying beneath the linen sheets, your white nightdress loose against your skin, the pale fabric creased from restless hours.
Your chamber was as it always was, orderly and composed, its high ceilings framed with carved wood. The walls were dressed in soft ivory and pale blue, the colors chosen not by you, but for you. A vanity table was near the far wall, its surface neat and polished, a silver brush resting precisely where it had been placed the night before.
A wardrobe stood closed, its contents carefully arranged: corsets, gowns, fabrics chosen more for appearance than comfort, because sometimes a corset meant that even the simplest actions, like walking, breathing, or merely existing, became harder than they should be.
Everything was in its place. Everything was still inside.
But your gaze drifted, slowly, inevitably, toward the window.
The curtains had been left slightly parted, just enough for the morning light to slip through in thin, golden lines. Beyond them, the world stretched open and alive, because the port, that even at this hour, was already awake.
Ships stood anchored in the harbor, their tall masts cutting into the pale sky. Smaller boats moved between them, their oars dipping into the water, carrying goods, messages and people.
You could almost hear all its noise from here. The distant shouts of sailors. The dull thud of crates being unloaded. The call of gulls circling overhead, sharp and a bit annoying. Somewhere, faintly, the clang of metal against wood.
Life.
Messy. Loud. Unpredictable.
Free.
A thin line of sunlight caught the surface of the sea, scattering across it in fractured gold.
Your fingers tightened slightly around the edge of the sheet.
From here, it looked so close.
Close enough that you could trace the movement of the ships. Close enough that you could imagine, just for a moment, what it would feel like to stand there instead. To step onto one of the ships to leave.
But distance was a deceptive thing. Because between you and that water stood walls, expectations and promises that had been made long before you had any say in them.
Your eyes lingered on the horizon.
The moment didn't last long because a soft knock sounded at the door, gentle enough, and though it did not startle you, it pulled you back into the room all the same.
You let out a quiet breath before speaking.
“Come in.”
The handle slowly turned, and the door opened just enough to allow Mary to slip inside, closing it behind her with the same quiet precision. She carried a silver tray in both hands, its polished surface catching the morning light as she crossed the room toward you.
Mary had been part of the household for years, long enough that her presence no longer felt like that of a servant but rather part of the family, or at least, a friend. She was composed, always neatly presented, her dark hair pinned back beneath a modest cap, her dress simple yet impeccably kept.
She set the tray carefully on the small table beside your bed before turning to you, her hands folding neatly in front of her.
Breakfast.
It was, as always, more than necessary.
A porcelain teapot was still steaming faintly, accompanied by a matching cup and saucer; slices of fresh bread arranged with care, a small dish of butter set beside them; a pot of jam, and a plate of fruit.
You pushed yourself up slightly against the pillows, moving some stands of hair away from your face with your hand, your gaze flickering from the tray to her.
“Mary,” you began with a little smile, “I’ve told you before, I don’t want breakfast in bed.” There was no sharpness in your tone, “I would rather have it at the table, when I’m ready. With you.”
Mary did not look surprised. If anything, she seemed to have expected it.
“I know, miss,” she replied gently, her hands still clasped together, “you’ve said so many times.”
There was the faintest pause before she continued, choosing her words with care.
“But a maid does not take breakfast with you.”
You exhaled softly, and before you could respond, however, Mary seemed to remember something.
“Oh,” she added, her expression shifting ever so slightly, “a letter arrived for you this morning.”
Your attention returned to her immediately. “From whom?”
Mary smiled, because she knew you were always happy to receive letters from your friend. “From Rosaline.”
The moment the name left her lips, something in you shifted and you immediately felt lighter.
“Rosaline!” you repeated.
Mary gave a small nod, as she reached into the pocket of her apron and carefully retrieved the letter, holding it out toward you.
You took it without hesitation.
The paper was slightly worn at the edges, marked by its journey. You had met Rosaline years ago, during one of your travels with your father, back when the world had still felt wide open, and your life had not yet been confined to the walls of Port Everleigh.
Your father had been an explorer, a man who belonged more to the sea than to any one place, and after your mother’s death, so early that you had no memory of her at all, you had become his only constant companion. Wherever his journeys took him, you followed. You had seen cities that did not sleep, markets overflowing with colors and voices you could barely understand, coastlines untouched and vast, stretching further than the eye could reach. You had learned early how to adapt, how to observe, how to read maps, calculate coordinates, and how to find wonder in the unfamiliar.
And then, there had been Saint Marlowe. It had not been your father’s destination, only a stop along the way, a place to resupply and to rest before continuing further across the sea.
The streets were alive, buildings rose in soft colors sun-faded by years of salt air, their windows open to let in the breeze, their balconies draped with fabrics that moved gently with the wind. Music could be heard at nearly any hour, drifting from open doors and crowded squares, blending with laughter and the murmur of conversation
Small shops lined the streets, like bakeries spilling the scent of fresh bread into the air, stalls crowded with fruit and spices, tailors and craftsmen working with their doors wide open as if inviting the world inside. Beyond the busier roads, nature was never far; narrow paths led to stretches of green, to gardens left to grow a little wild, and to cliffs where the land gave way to the sea, the horizon vast and untouched.
That was where you had met your friend.
Rosaline was your age, she had spoken easily, as though you had known each other for years rather than moments, and before long, she had taken it upon herself to show you the city.
You had stayed only a short time, as you always did, yet it had been enough to appreciate that beautiful land.
When you left, you had not expected to see her again.
But the letters had started not long after.
The letters had begun not long after you left Saint Marlowe, and somehow, despite the distance, despite the years that had passed, the two of you had never truly lost touch.
You unfolded the letter carefully, your eyes moving across the familiar handwriting.
Rosaline told you about a cat she had found wandering into her garden, and then spoke of a man she had met. She had known him for a week, no more, and yet she claimed to be madly in love with him.
You found yourself smiling a little more at that.
It was so like her.
You had not even reached the final lines when Mary’s voice broke gently through your thoughts.
“You are to meet Sir Whitmore today, are you not?”
The words were not sharp, nor unkind, and yet you felt the warmth of the letter slipping through your fingers.
Your smile faded, though slowly, as your gaze lingered on the page for just a moment longer before you finally lowered it.
“Yes,” you answered, your voice quieter now, more distant than before. “I am to go to him this afternoon.”
Mary watched you carefully, her expression unreadable for a brief second before she tilted her head slightly.
“And you are not pleased?”
You let out a breath that felt heavier than it should have, your fingers folding the letter with more care than necessary before setting it down beside you.
“Pleased?” you repeated, you tone sharper now. “For what, exactly?”
There was a pause, and then, more plainly...
“For the prospect of marrying a man I do not love?” you continued, meeting her gaze now. “No, Mary. I am not.”
Mary hesitated, as though weighing her response, before speaking again, her voice still gentle, though more insistent this time.
“But he is the governor,” she said. “Sir Whitmore is a man of standing, of wealth… of power. There are many who would consider such a match—”
“A privilege?” you finished for her, a faint, humorless smile touching your lips.
She did not deny it.
You shook your head slightly, looking away for a moment, your gaze drifting back toward the window, toward the distant line of the sea that still called to you in ways you could not quite explain. You wanted to leave, you wanted to travel, to see the world again, to live.
“It does not matter what he is,” you said after a moment, more quietly now, but no less certain. “If I do not love him, I do not love him. And no amount of power or wealth will change that.”
Now, the silence felt heavier.
When Sir Edward Whitmore, the governor of the city, had first declared himself to you, you had not given him the answer everyone had expected. Instead, to the scandal of almost every person present, you had simply said that you would think about it, as though such a proposal could be weighed like any ordinary decision, as though your entire future were not meant to be decided in a single breath.
You had been told, again and again, how fortunate you were, how amazing it was for a man of such wealth and influence to choose you, how foolish it would be to refuse something so advantageous, as if love had ever been part of the equation they cared about. And so, in the days that followed, every voice around you had pressed the same conclusion into your ears, until even your doubts began to sound unreasonable, until refusal itself started to feel like defiance for its own sake. In the end, you had said yes.
And the moment you had, it had not felt like relief, but rather like something quietly closing around you, like a door shutting with no sound at all, leaving you standing on the wrong side of a life you had not chosen.
That afternoon, you prepared yourself with more care than you felt. A dress had been chosen for you in soft tones, neither too loud nor too plain, the fabric falling gracefully on you. The bodice was fitted but not uncomfortably tight, and the skirt flowed around you in gentle layers that moved with each step you took. Your hair had been carefully gathered and pinned back, the strands smoothed and braided before being secured in a simple, refined arrangement that left your neck exposed and your expression more composed than you felt inside.
You did not linger in front of the mirror longer than necessary.
When you arrived at Sir Whitmore’s residence, you immediately recognized it. It stood larger than most, its stone façade was clean and framed by tall windows that reflected the afternoon light. The door was opened after only a brief pause, as though your arrival had been expected long before you reached it.
Then, Sir Whitmore appeared, dressed with precision, every detail of him carefully maintained, as though even a single misplaced thread would be an imperfection too great to allow. His coat was dark and finely tailored, his cravat tied with practiced elegance, and his gloves immaculate, though he removed one as he stepped forward to greet you. His posture was upright and controlled.
“Sir Whitmore,” you greeted him politely, inclining your head.
A faint pause followed, as if he were unused to such formality from you.
“Edward,” he corrected smoothly, though not unkindly. “You will be my wife soon enough. There is no need for titles between us.”
For a fleeting second, something sharp almost rose to your lips, something dangerously close to Don’t remind me, but you swallowed it before it could take shape, the corners of your mouth tightening just slightly instead.
Instead, you only gave a small, controlled nod.
He stepped aside to let you in.
The interior of his home matched its exterior in every way, refined and expensive, filled with polished wood, soft carpets and clean furniture. You were guided into a sitting room where a low table had already been prepared, a fine porcelain tea set arranged neatly upon it.
A maid entered shortly after, carrying a tray, but as she poured the tea, her fingers trembled ever so slightly, the cup clinking faintly against its saucer.
Edward’s gaze sharpened almost immediately.
“Careful,” he said, his tone low and cold, without raising his voice.
The maid flinched.
You, however, offered her a gentle nod as she finished, “Thank you.”
Edward’s attention returned to you as the tea was served properly, the silence between you settling again as the door closed behind the maid.
For a moment, there was only the quiet sound of porcelain.
“Preparations for the wedding will begin soon,” he said at last.
“I’ve heard,” you replied.
His gaze lingered on you.
“Is there anything in particular you would like?” he asked. “For the ceremony, the arrangements… anything at all.”
You hesitated only briefly, though not because you were considering possibilities, but because none of them truly mattered to you.
“No,” you said at last, without much emotion. “I don’t think so.”
Something flickered in his expression, subtle enough that most would not have noticed, but you did. Still, he said nothing.
Instead, your eyes drifted away from him, slowly taking in the room once more. And then your gaze caught on something that interrupted the symmetry of it all.
A large map of the world hung on one of the walls.
It was old enough to feel lived-in, yet carefully preserved, its surface marked with faint lines, ports, and distant lands.
“May I look at it?” you asked, setting your teacup down with care.
Edward seemed momentarily surprised, as though the request were unexpected.
“Mm… of course,” he replied after a brief pause.
You rose from your seat and moved toward the wall. Up close, the map was even more detailed, the continents marked, the seas filled with names and routes.
Edward followed you a few moments later, stopping just behind and slightly to your side, watching as your gaze traced across it.
Without thinking too much about it, you lifted a hand and pointed.
“I would like to go here,” you said, tracing a distant coastline far beyond the familiar routes of Port Everleigh. Then your hand shifted slightly, moving across the painted ocean. “And here.”
Edward’s eyes followed your gesture, though his expression remained carefully neutral, as though he were observing something mildly unusual rather than genuinely intrigued.
You moved again, more certain now, your finger tapping different regions.
“I have been here,” you said, a faint softness entering your voice despite yourself. “It was… very beautiful.” Your hand shifted once more, sliding across the map with less enthusiasm this time. “Here, though, there was not much worth remembering.”
Edward gave a small, almost absent nod.
“Hm,” he murmured. “I suppose that is often the case with distant places. They rarely live up to expectation.”
It was not unkind, but it was detached. Still, you did not stop.
Your finger hovered over another stretch of sea, a place marked with fewer routes, fewer names, the ink lighter as though even the cartographer had been uncertain.
“I have never sailed through these waters,” you said.
“Well, those seas,” he said, after a brief pause, “are known to be infested with pirates.”
There was a quiet finality in his tone, as if that alone should end any further curiosity.
You turned your head slightly toward him.
“Pirates?” you repeated.
A faint, humorless exhale left him.
“Brutal men,” he continued. “Lawless. Violent. They take what they want and leave nothing but ruin behind them.”
You listened, and then, after a brief pause, you said quietly, “Maybe they simply want to be free.”
After a moment of silence, Edward let out a short laugh.
“You think so?” he said, tilting his head slightly as he looked at you properly for the first time since you had begun speaking. “You believe men who burn ships and rob the King just... want to be free?”
There was a faint edge of ridicule beneath his words now, and you decided it was better not to add anything else.
Then he shook his head slightly, almost imperceptibly.
“You have spent too much time in the wrong places,” he said at last.
You didn’t speak, and your eyes returned to the map instead, lingering on the sea.
When you got back home, the night came quietly as the hours passed and the last of the daylight faded completely from the sky.
You stood near the bed as Mary moved about the room, finishing the small, familiar tasks that marked the end of your day. The heavier layers of your dress had already been set aside, replaced by your simple nightdress, far more comfortable than anything you had worn that afternoon. Your hair, once carefully pinned and arranged, now fell freely down your back, loose strands brushing gently against your shoulders.
You preferred it this way, there was a relief in it.
Mary adjusted the covers before stepping back, her hands smoothing the fabric with care.
For a moment, she said nothing.
Then, glancing toward you, she asked, “Was it… a pleasant meeting with Sir Whitmore?”
There was something cautious in the way she said it, as though she already suspected the answer and yet hoped to be proven wrong.
You moved toward the bed, slipping beneath the covers without much thought, settling into the familiar space as you reached for the book resting on your bedside table.
“I wouldn't call it pleasant,” you replied.
Mary did not move.
“Be serious,” she said after a moment, her tone gentle but insistent.
You paused only briefly before opening the book, your eyes dropping to the page.
“I am,” you answered, just as simply.
The meeting had been exactly what it was meant to be.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
Mary seemed to consider pressing further, but in the end, she did not. Instead, she gave a small nod to herself, as though accepting an answer, before stepping back toward the door.
“Good night, miss.”
“Good night, Mary.”
The door closed softly behind her, leaving you alone once more, and the room returned to silence.
You read for a while, though the words did not hold your attention as firmly as they usually might have. Your thoughts drifted too easily, slipping between the memory of the map, the echo of Edward’s voice, and the letter still resting nearby.
After a few pages, you stopped.
The book lowered slightly in your hands as your gaze unfocused, lingering somewhere beyond the lines.
Then, with a quiet breath, you set it aside, and eventually, sleep came.
When you woke up hours later, you didn’t fully understand what was happening at first.
The room was dark, just as it should have been in the middle of the night, but something felt off. It took you a few seconds to notice the faint light filtering through your curtains, a strange red-orange glow that usually wasn't there.
At first, still half asleep, you thought it might be a lamp left burning somewhere outside.
But then you heard the voices.
Loud, shouting, overlapping and panicked. Then a heavy crash, followed by something that sounded like wood breaking. Another shout, closer this time.
You were fully awake now.
You sat up quickly, pushing the covers aside before getting out of bed, the cold floor making you move faster as you crossed the room. The noise kept growing, clearer with every step and impossible to ignore.
Something was wrong.
You reached the window and pulled the curtains apart.
And froze.
A part of the port was on fire.
Flames spread across the docks, climbing up wooden structures and licking at the sides of some ships. Smoke filled the air, rising into the night sky. The light you had seen was coming from the fire itself, reflecting off the water in uneven, shifting patterns.
People were running everywhere.
Some were trying to carry things, others were just trying to get away. You could hear screams now, clearer than before, mixed with orders being shouted and the constant noise of things breaking, falling and burning.
And among the chaos, you saw men who were not trying to escape.
They moved fast, but not like the others. Not afraid.
Their clothes were rough and worn, nothing like the neat uniforms of guards, and different than merchants' clothes. Long coats, loose shirts, belts with weapons, heavy boots. Some had cloth tied around their heads or necks, others carried blades that caught the firelight as they moved.
And they were stealing.
Barrels passed from one to another, crates dragged away, anything of value grabbed without hesitation. A few of them were fighting, pushing people aside, striking when needed, clearing their way through the chaos.
Your gaze shifted further out, toward the center of the port.
There was a ship. Large, dark and still.
It stood out immediately, its hull almost black, its white sails visible even in the dim orange light, barely moving.
They were pirates. And they were attacking your port.
You remained by the window, unable to sleep after that, while everything outside fell into chaos, your hands resting against the frame.
Soon, you saw the guards arrive.
At first in small numbers, then more, their presence growing as the alarm spread through the city. Their uniforms stood out even in the firelight, their voices cutting through the noise as they tried to regain control.
You saw them fighting. Steel against steel, shouts turning sharper, more ordered, though never fully enough to match the chaos the pirates had brought with them.
And still, the pirates did not scatter immediately.
You watched them move back and forth between the docks and their ship, carrying barrels, crates, anything they could take, passing goods from one to another. They did not push deeper into the city, did not attempt to break past the port itself, and you were so glad of this.
Your home, standing where it did, would have been one of the first they reached.
Eventually, the balance began to shift.
There were too many guards.
You could see it in the way the movement changed, in the way the pirates no longer advanced but began to pull back instead. The last of the stolen goods were loaded onto the ship, ropes thrown, and by one, they began to retreat.
You watched as they made their way back aboard, climbing swiftly, disappearing into the dark shape of the vessel as it prepared to leave.
And then, something caught your attention.
A figure.
At first, you thought it was just another fight, another clash among many, but this one did not end the same way.
He was alone, the last one still on the dock.
Guards surrounded him from all sides, closing in, focused entirely on him. Even from this distance, you could tell he was fighting, holding them off as long as he could, moving with force and making it clear he had no intention of surrendering.
But there were too many.
One strike. Then another.
You saw him stagger.
Still, he did not go down immediately.
It took more, several guards pressing in at once, overwhelming him, forcing him back until finally, he collapsed under the weight of it all.
He stopped moving, and your breath caught slightly.
The ship did not wait.
As the last of the pirates climbed aboard, the ropes were cut loose, sails shifting as the vessel began to move, pulling away from the port.
Leaving him behind.
You watched as the guards approached his unmoving form, one of them crouching briefly before signaling to the others. They grabbed him, not gently, lifting him just enough to drag him across the dock.
Even from this distance, you could tell he was not dead.
Unconscious, perhaps, but alive.
His head fell forward as they moved him, dark hair slipping loose, not long enough to fully hide his face, yet enough, combined with the distance, the darkness, that you could not make out his features clearly.
You remained by the window as the chaos slowly faded, watching people work through the night to put out the fire and restore what they could. Buckets of water were passed, and the port gradually returned to something closer to what it used to look like. You did not move for hours, your gaze fixed outside as darkness gave way to the pale light of dawn, the flames replaced by morning sun. Only then did you realize you had spent the entire night there, standing in silence, watching everything fall apart and come back together again.
You fell asleep that early morning the moment you finally returned to bed, completely drained from the night spent awake at the window, your body giving in.
It did not last long.
A soft knock pulled you back to consciousness, followed almost immediately by Mary’s voice on the other side of the door.
“Miss, I am sorry to wake you, but Sir Whitmore is here and he wishes to see you.”
You sat up slowly, still exhausted. There was no space to refuse, no time to even properly gather your thoughts.
“Come in,” you answered.
Mary entered, closing the door gently behind her. The moment she saw you properly awake, she moved into action without delay, helping you wash and dress. Your hair was brushed and pinned back with care. As she worked, the two of you spoke about the events of the night.
“It was terrifying,” Mary said quietly as she adjusted the fabric at your shoulders. “The fire, the shouting… I thought the whole port would burn down.”
When you were finally ready, there was no time left to rest. Sir Whitmore was already waiting.
You found him in the sitting room, standing by one of the windows as though he had been there for some time. He turned as you entered, composed as always, dressed immaculately despite the early hour, as if nothing in the world could disturb his presentation.
“Good morning,” he said, stepping toward you. “I was passing through and wondered if you would accompany me for a walk.”
You stopped for a fraction of a second.
You were tired. You had not had your breakfast yet, had barely slept, and the last thing you wanted was a walk with him.
For a brief moment, you almost said it.
I would rather rest.
I would rather not see your face today or ever again.
I would rather not leave my bedroom.
But none of it left your lips.
“Of course,” you said instead. “Let’s go.”
Everything in the streets outside looked normal and walked beside him in silence for a while before he spoke again.
“Have you heard about the terrible events of last night?” he asked.
“I saw them,” you replied simply. “From my bedroom window.”
He gave a small, grave nod. “It was fortunate there were no deaths. Considering the damage, we were lucky.”
You did not answer immediately, and he continued.
“Even more fortunate,” he added, “that we managed to capture the captain of Bad Omens.”
You stopped walking for a fraction of a second.
The name struck something faintly familiar, though distant, like something you had heard years ago during one of your travels and never thought about again.
“Bad Omens?” you repeated.
“A pretty.... famous pirate crew,” he said. “They have been responsible for countless attacks along the coast in the last ten years. Ports raided, ships taken, entire cargos stolen. For years, we have tried to stop them.”
He exhaled lightly, almost satisfied.
“They say their captain has escaped capture more times than we can count,” Edward went on. “But not this time. The guards were prepared, and for once, everything went as it should.”
A faint, almost pleased smile touched his expression.
“Noah Sebastian is finally in our custody,” he said. “And he will rot in the prison of Port Everleigh.”
And that was exactly the moment the most reckless, unreasonable idea you had ever had took shape in your mind.
So absurd that, under any other circumstance, you would have dismissed it instantly. No proper young woman of your standing, raised well, promised in marriage to the governor of a city, would even allow herself to think such a thing, not even in jest, not even as a distant possibility.
And yet, the thought remained. And it was impossible to ignore.
Noah Sebastian.
A pirate. A criminal. A man you had never seen, never spoken to, who now sat somewhere in the city's prison, locked behind bars.
And somehow... he felt like your way out.
The idea made no sense. It was dangerous, illogical, and very likely impossible. You had no reason to believe it would work, no proof that he would even listen to you, let alone agree to anything you might offer.
And still, as you walked beside the man you were meant to marry, in a city that no longer resembled anything but a cage, it did not feel impossible.
It felt like an opportunity.
You could free him.
The thought alone should have terrified you.
Instead, you felt quiet sure about it, in that moment.
You could free him… and in return, he could take you away from all of this.
To Saint Marlowe.
To Rosaline.
To a life that had once felt out of reach, but now seemed suddenly and dangerously, possible again.
It was madness, and yet, as you continued walking beside Edward, listening to him speak about the wedding dress he had already chosen, and bought, without once asking for your opinion, it began to feel like the only thing that made sense.
Your responses came automatically, distant and polite, while your mind remained elsewhere, fixed on that single, crazy idea. At that moment, it felt like the closest thing to freedom you had. And if it failed… then it failed. You would die at the hands of a pirate, which did not seem much worse than living a life that was never truly yours. So, perhaps, it was worth trying.
So, that same afternoon, you returned to Edward’s house under the pretense of a sudden idea, one that, under normal circumstances, might have even sounded convincing.
You told him you had seen dahlias at the market that morning, flowers you liked so much you thought they would be perfect for the centerpieces at your wedding, something elegant yet different, something that would make the tables stand out.
Edward had listened, then nodded.
“Yes, that could be arranged,” he had said. “I will make a note of it.”
He mentioned his agenda, something he had been using to organize every detail of the ceremony, and excused himself to retrieve it, leaving you alone in the sitting room.
You smiled. You nodded.
And the moment he was out of sight, you were on your feet instantly, your steps silent against the carpet as you moved toward the cabinet in the corner. You barely hesitated before kneeling, pulling open the lowest drawer.
He had mentioned it once, and you remembered.
You searched quickly, your fingers brushing against papers, and some small objects, then metal.
You froze for half a second before pulling them free.
A heavy ring, holding a number of large, dark keys, cold against your skin.
You had found them.
Your heart was beating faster now, louder than it should have been, but there was no time to think about it. You slipped them beneath your corset, pressing them against your side, adjusting the fabric just enough to keep them hidden.
The pressure was immediate and uncomfortable.
The rigid shape of the keys dug into your skin beneath the already tight corset, making it harder to breathe than it had been before. You could already tell it would leave a bruise.
But it did not matter.
You pushed the drawer closed just as you heard his steps returning.
By the time Edward reentered the room, you were standing where you had been before, your expression composed, as though nothing had changed.
He glanced at you briefly before speaking again, already focused on the matter at hand.
You did not let him continue.
“Edward,” you said, just quickly enough to interrupt, your tone apologetic, “I have just remembered that I promised Mary I would help her with something important this afternoon. I truly must go.”
There was a brief pause, as though he had not expected that, but then he nodded.
“Of course,” he said. “Se you again soon.”
You gave him a small, polite smile, forcing yourself not to move too quickly as you reached for your coat, slipping it on like you usually did, despite the uncomfortable weight hidden beneath your corset.
Then, without giving yourself the chance to hesitate, you left.
You had stopped by home quickly, grabbed a jacket, slipped some gold jewelry into your pockets (things you could trade for money if you ever made it to your destination) and put on a pair of more comfortable boots. You had kept your dress and corset on, the keys still hidden inside, afraid that if anyone saw them, they would start asking questions.
The city’s prison was smaller than you might have expected for a place of such importance, tucked between two older stone buildings. Its walls were thick and dark. There was a heavy wooden door reinforced with iron bars, and narrow windows set too high to see through properly.
You reached it quickly, your breath slightly uneven from the pace you had kept, your heart still racing, not just from the run, but from everything you were about to do.
Two guards stood outside, just as expected.
One of them turned at the sound of your approach, confusion already forming on his face as he recognized you.
He was one of Edward’s closest acquaintances, a man you had seen many times, though never for any reason that made him seem particularly competent. If anything, he was known more for his lack of awareness than anything else and he usually struggled with the simplest instructions.
And yet, somehow, he had ended up guarding the prison. Well, good for you.
“Miss?” he said, clearly caught off guard. “What—”
“Have you not heard?” you cut in immediately, as you stepped closer, not giving him time to think.
Both guards straightened.
“Heard what?” the other one asked.
“The port,” you said quickly, breathless just enough to make it convincing. “It has caught fire again.”
“What?” the first guard blinked. “Again?”
You stared at them, as if the answer should have been obvious.
“What is it, is there a law that forbids the port from burning two days in a row?” you snapped, “One of the ships is on fire! They need help!”
That was enough.
They exchanged a quick look, and then, almost at the same time, they moved.
“Come on,” one of them muttered, already turning.
Within seconds, they were gone.
You stood there for only a moment, listening to their footsteps fade, making sure they were far enough.
Then you turned.
Your hand moved quickly to the door, fingers tightening around the handle as you pushed it open and stepped inside before you could stop yourself.
The air felt different inside.
It was colder, heavier and it smelled of damp stone, rust and dirty men. The space was narrow, lit only by a few dim lanterns fixed along the walls.
Cells lined both sides, each one closed off by thick iron bars. Some were empty, others not. Chains hung in places, bolted into the stone, and the floor beneath your feet was uneven, marked by dirt and old stains.
One man was singing, loudly, and terribly off-key, his voice echoing in the place. Somewhere further down, another muttered to himself in a constant stream of words you couldn’t quite make out. A third was asleep, or at least unconscious enough to be snoring heavily, the sound rising and falling in uneven rhythm. And somewhere to your right, two voices argued back and forth, mad and irritated, though neither seemed particularly interested in ending the dispute.
And then they noticed you.
The singing faltered first.
“Well now—” someone drawled from behind the bars, his tone shifting immediately. “What’s a beauty like you doing down here?”
A low chuckle followed from another cell. “Lost your way, sweetheart?”
“Or looking for company?” a third voice added, followed by a few scattered laughs.
“If you’re staying, I’ve got space—”
“Come a little closer, love, don’t be shy—”
“That’s enough,” you said, trying to cut through them.
It didn’t work.
If anything, it encouraged them.
“Listen to that—she’s got a voice too—”
“Fiery one, aren’t you?”
“Careful, I like that—”
“Enough!” you snapped, louder this time, your voice echoing down the corridor.
That did it.
There was a quiet pause and you could finally speak without being immediately talked over.
“I’m looking for Noah Sebastian.”
There was a brief moment of silence.
Then, from somewhere further down talked. “The last cell,” one of the men that was arguing said. “All the way at the end.”
You didn’t hesitate.
You moved forward again, your dress brushing dangerously close to the dirty floor as you passed each cell. You could feel their eyes on you as you walked, following your movement.
A whistle sounded behind you.
“Good luck with that one,” someone muttered.
You ignored them, and you reached the last cell at the end of the corridor.
He was there.
Sitting on the ground, his back resting against the cold stone wall, his head lowered just enough that his face remained hidden in shadow. Strands of dark hair fell forward, obscuring his features, though you could make out the outline of him in the dim, flickering light.
He look too calm for someone who had fought the way you had seen the night before.
A loose black shirt hung from his frame, the fabric worn and slightly open at the collar, revealing the faint lines of ink beneath. His trousers were darker, more fitted, tucked into boots that had clearly seen better days.
For a moment, you simply stood there.
Then...
“Have you come to see a pirate up close?”
His voice broke the silence before you could speak.
It wasn’t what you had expected.
Rough, yes, and also tired, but not as low, not as heavy as you had imagined.
You straightened slightly.
“No,” you said. “I’m here to make you an offer.”
There was a pause.
Then, slowly, he lifted his head.
And for the first time, you saw him.
The light from the corridor caught his face just enough to reveal it in pieces at first, his dark eyes, the shape of his lips softer than you had expected, and features that you had imagined to be much sharper than they actually were.
His expression was unreadable, though not uninterested.
He pushed himself to his feet in one smooth movement, brushing dust from his hands before stepping closer to the bars, his gaze never leaving you.
“Interesting,” he said.
Up close, you could see more.
You noticed the ink along his neck, dark lines disappearing beneath the collar of his shirt. More across his hands, stretching over his fingers in patterns you couldn’t fully make out in the dim light.
And something told you that the tattoos didn’t stop there.
You noticed the faint trace of stubble along his jaw, with the slightest hint of a mustache that was almost softening his features.
His eyes moved over you, taking in the fabric of your dress and the small details that set you apart from everything around you.
“Go ahed, princess.”
“I can get you out of here,” you said quickly, “But only if you agree to something for me in return.”
One of his brows lifted slightly.
“Oh?” he said. “And what could you possibly want from me?”
“I want you to take me with you,” you replied. “Out of this city. To Saint Marlowe.”
There was a pause. Then, a quiet, short laugh.
“Saint Marlowe?” he repeated, almost like he couldn’t quite believe what he had heard. “That’s not exactly around the corner.”
“I know.”
“It’s on the other side of the world,” he went on, tilting his head slightly as he studied you, as if trying to understand whether you truly meant it. “That’s not a quick trip. That’s months at sea. Maybe longer.”
You held his gaze.
“Do you want to be free or not?”
That seemed to amuse him more than anything else.
A faint smile touched his lips.
“You’re fortunate,” he said after a moment, his tone shifting slightly. “I was already planning to head in that direction. There are islands not far from there I intend to pass by.”
“Good,” you said, almost immediately. “Then we have a deal. I get you out, and you take me to Saint Marlowe.”
You were expecting a confirmation, but instead he asked for your name. You hesitated for a second, almost thinking of lying, but then decided there was no point and told him. He replied, “Noah, but maybe they’ve already told you.”
After a moment, he spoke again.
“Well, now I’m curious,” he said, leaning slightly closer to the bars. “How exactly were you planning to get me out of here?”
You slipped a hand beneath your corset and pulled, the metal keys finally coming free as you drew them out, allowing yourself a deeper breath now that the pressure against your ribs had eased.
Another quiet laugh.
“Keys,” he murmured. “You came prepared... How does a lady like you get her hands on the keys to a prison?”
“I’m the governor’s fiancée,” you replied.
That earned you a different reaction.
His head tilted slightly, studying you again, more carefully this time, as if reassessing everything he had thought about you.
“Oh,” he said slowly. “We’ve got a rebellious princess, then.”
You frowned slightly at the word, but he didn’t seem particularly concerned whether you liked it or not.
In fact, he seemed to enjoy it.
“A governor’s fiancée,” he repeated. His gaze flicked briefly to the keys in your hand, then back to you. “And here you are, sneaking into a prison to bargain with a pirate, wanting to commit a crime and sail across the world.”
A pause.
“You don’t look like someone who’s ever done anything like this before,” he added. “No offense.”
“None taken. But i have traveled. I know the sea.”
“You’re either very brave,” he said, “or very stupid.”
“Which one do you think?”
He didn’t hesitate.
“A bit of both,” he replied easily.
Despite yourself, something in that almost made you smile.
Almost.
And he noticed.
Of course he did.
“Are you agreeing or not?”
He watched you for a second longer, then exhaled softly, like he had come to a decision.
“Well,” he said, straightening just a little, “I was going to rot in here otherwise, so...”
He gave a small, careless shrug.
“I suppose I can make room on my ship for one very determined princess.”
Then he slipped one hand through the bars, and extended it toward you. A couple of rings caught the dim light on his fingers, metal glinting softly against inked skin.
“Well?” he said quietly.
You didn’t hesitate. You stepped closer and took his hand, shaking it for a brief moment.
His grip was firm, fingers rough against yours, his rings pressing lightly into your skin.
“Yeah,” he said after a moment, shaking his head slightly as his hand left yours. “You’re definitely going to regret this.”
“Open the door,” he added then, nodding toward the lock. “Let’s find out how long it takes before you change your mind, princess.”
Noah taglist pt 1: @mushrumink @sullyselena @buttercupbabyyy @pathion @pipidoll @missduffsblog @astronoids @myexistencesucks @overmydeadbodysblog @margocos-blog @heyitsjay316 @sallyba3 @bartxnhood @lacy1986 @iamamatus @dream-machine-love @amoursims @suessmausnici @whimsicaldiamonds @imyourliquor-youremypoison @punkprincess1999 @bored-rato @thepeoplesblog @dxthrone @illmakeyousaywow @xmads-omensx @sikowitzbitch @tosoundlessdarkistare @sadbitchenergy @flowery-mess @anything-morethan-human @lekyswixexx @english-fucker @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @ichoosetenderomens @theservantbones @pacificbutbmth @theanarchymuse95 @ykaaretsfood @noahsebastiann
SCREAMING RN!!! This is another masterpiece that I’m already obsessed with, I’m a huge fan of one piece plus all things pirate in general so I LOVEEEEE this with my whole heart 🥹🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
This might be a long reblog but I fear this may be my new hyper fixation so I have to 😭
I SQUEALED DURING THIS PART
"I'm looking for Noah Sebastian.
There was a brief moment of silence.
Then, from somewhere further down talked. "The last cell," one of the men that was arguing said. "All the way at the end.""
You didn't hesitate.
You moved forward again, your dress brushing dangerously close to the dirty floor as you passed each cell. You could feel their eyes on you as you walked, following your movement.
A whistle sounded behind you.
"Good luck with that one," someone muttered.
You ignored them, and you reached the last cell at the end of the corridor.
He was there.
Sitting on the ground, his back resting against the cold stone wall, his head lowered just enough that his face remained hidden in shadow. Strands of dark hair fell forward, obscuring his features, though you could make out the outline of him in the dim, flickering light.
He look too calm for someone who had fought the way you had seen the night before.
He look too calm for someone who had fought the way you had seen the night before.
A loose black shirt hung from his frame, the fabric worn and slightly open at the collar, revealing the faint lines of ink beneath. His trousers were darker, more fitted, tucked into boots that had clearly seen better days.
For a moment, you simply stood there.
Then...
"Have you come to see a pirate up close?"
Well 🤭..
His voice broke the silence before you could speak.
It wasn't what you had expected.
Rough, yes, and also tired, but not as low, not as heavy as you had imagined.
You straightened slightly.
"No," you said. "I'm here to make you an offer."
There was a pause.
Then, slowly, he lifted his head.
And for the first time, you saw him.
The light from the corridor caught his face just enough to reveal it in pieces at first, his dark eyes, the shape of his lips softer than you had expected, and features that you had imagined to be much sharper than they actually were.
His expression was unreadable, though not uninterested.
He pushed himself to his feet in one smooth movement, brushing dust from his hands before stepping closer to the bars, his gaze never leaving you.
"Interesting." he said.
Up close, you could see more.
You noticed the ink along his neck, dark lines disappearing beneath the collar of his shirt.
More across his hands, stretching over his fingers in patterns you couldn't fully make out in the dim light.
And something told you that the tattoos didn't stop there.
You noticed the faint trace of stubble along his jaw, with the slightest hint of a mustache that was almost softening his features.
His eyes moved over you, taking in the fabric of your dress and the small details that set you apart from everything around you.
"Go ahed. princess."
"I can get you out of here," you said quickly, "But only if you agree to something for me in return." One of his brows lifted slightly.
"Oh?" he said. "And what could you possibly want from me?"
"I want you to take me with you" you replied. "Out of this city. To Saint Marlowe."
There was a pause. Then, a quiet, short laugh.
"Saint Marlowe?" he repeated, almost like he couldn't quite believe what he had heard.
"That's not exactly around the corner."
"I know."
"It's on the other side of the world," he went on, tilting his head slightly as he studied you, as if trying to understand whether you truly meant it. "That's not a quick trip. That's months at sea. Maybe longer."
You held his gaze.
"Do you want to be free or not?"
That seemed to amuse him more than anything else.
A faint smile touched his lips.
"You're fortunate," he said after a moment, his tone shifting slightly.
"I was already planning to head in that direction. There are islands not far from there I intend to pass by.”
"Good," you said, almost immediately. "Then we have a deal. I get you out, and you take me to Saint Marlowe."
The adventure begins!!! 🥳🍻 I’m a little scared tho ngl like pls be careful my babies
"I suppose I can make room on my ship for one very determined princess."
Then he slipped one hand through the bars, and extended it toward you. A couple of rings caught the dim light on his fingers, metal glinting softly against inked skin.
"Well?" he said quietly.
You didn't hesitate. You stepped closer and took his hand, shaking it for a brief moment.
His grip was firm, fingers rough against yours, his rings pressing lightly into your skin.
"Yeah," he said after a moment, shaking his head slightly as his hand left yours. "You're definitely going to regret this."
"Open the door," he added then, nodding toward the lock. "Let's find out how long it takes before you change your mind, princess."
AHHHHHH SO EXCITED TO CATCH UP ON THE NEXT CHAPTER 😭🩷🩷🩷
always at your side ✯ noah sebastian x f!reader
warnings: swearing, a little angst
word count: 1.6k
masterlist | taglist sign-up
The moment Noah spots you, he’s attached to your side.
He’d alluded to how rough this tour was on him over the phone, but seeing him so clingy tells you that it’s much worse than you had previously thought. He holds onto your hand almost painfully. Thankfully, this was the last show of the tour. And with all of the chaos that surrounds that, you can just quietly take him back to your hotel room.
As a first order of business, you usher him into the bathroom.
A hot shower will do wonders for him already.
Noah doesn’t protest when you tell him to strip. For someone of his size, he looks awfully meek when you lead him under the steaming shower. He towers over you quite a bit, but that doesn’t stop you from pampering him. He’s always a little reluctant when it comes to this, always a little resistant when you tell him to sit so that you can wash his hair for him. Today, he follows a little easier.
“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” you ask, as you’re drying off.
He looks at you, all wide-eyed and pretty.
“A little better.” He mumbles, barely managing to look at you.
“Well, we gotta make that a lot, don’t we?” You bring your hand to his chin, carefully urging his head upwards, “Should we order something to eat or do you want to wait a bit longer?”
Noah remains quiet for a moment longer before he finally speaks up, “We can wait.”
“Okay. Do you want to lie down for a bit? We can watch a movie if you want?”
He brings a hand to your waist, fiddling with the edge of your towel, “Movie would be nice.”
“Why don’t you go ahead and get comfy? I’ll be right with you.”
He doesn’t move immediately. Instead, he remains where he is for a long moment, hand still placed against your waist.
“You don’t have to go. You can stay here with me while I finish up.” You say softly, “I won’t take long at all.”
He looks a little like a lost puppy while he waits for you to finish your skin and hair care. He lingers just a few steps behind you, watching your every move so carefully.
You watch him in the mirror. Noah’s nervous shifting makes you wonder just how tense he really is. The only other time you’ve seen him this wired up had been just after he came home from the cancelled tour. It breaks your heart to see him like this. You hope that you’ll be able to patch him back up quicker this time.
“Come here, will you honey.”
Noah follows without hesitation.
You’ve learned that he needs a little more direction when he feels like this. It’s easier for him to rely on someone he trusts to tell him what to do and where to go when his mind is already so crowded with worries. You’re more than happy to do it, if it means that he’ll feel a little more at ease.
You manoeuvrer him around, until you can gently force him to sit on the closed lid of the toilet. Noah lets out a little huff as he slumps down. You place your hands on the sides of his face, tilting his head upwards so that he has to look at you.
“We’ll have you back up on your feet in no time.” you say with a smile, “I rescheduled our flights to next week so that we can stay here for a moment longer. Phones off, and we’ll get all the treats we want. Did you know that they do massages here? According to the reviews they are life changing.”
That does finally get a little quirk of a smile out him.
“We’ll order as much take out as you want, all of the greasy unhealthy fast food you can think of.”
Noah blinks up at you for a moment.
You can practically watch the thoughts rattling around his head.
“Tacos.” he mumbles eventually, “And Nick said there’s a place that does these really good wraps somewhere around here.”
You draw your thumbs across his cheeks, watching the smile on his face widen a little.
“We’ll have plenty of time to tick all of that off.” You lean down to press a kiss to his forehead, “And now get into bed and pick a movie.”
Noah gives you a half-hearted salute before standing back up again.
He doesn’t step away from you immediately. Instead, he pulls you close by your waist. You let Noah pull you into a hug. You feel him drape his body over yours, resting his chin on top of your shoulder. He lets out a heavy sigh, somehow sagging even further against you.
You wrap your arms around him, feeling the warm skin of his back under your palms. His breathing is slow and steady, deliberately so.
“I love you so much.” he whispers then, “Thank you for taking care of me.”
“Always.” you whisper in return, “I told you that I’d always be there. You don’t have to do any of this alone.”
Noah pulls away from you just a little bit, “I know. But — I’ve had a lot of people say that and —”
He doesn’t have to finish the sentence.
You know his history, how much he’s been let down by people who promised to be by his side at all times. You’d always made it clear that you wouldn’t be like that, but it had been understandably hard for him to actually internalise it. On some days it had felt like an uphill battle, a fight you couldn’t possibly win with how guarded he’d been when you had first met.
The walls had come down slowly but surely.
A conversation like this would have been near unthinkable when you’d started going out in a serious way.
“I’ll happily take care of you when you need it. I promised it and I intend to keep that promise. And if that means that I’ll have to keep reminding you of the fact that nothing and no one can make me move away from you, I’ll do that too.” you take his hand into yours, “I love you, Noah and I’ll always be here to pick you up. Always. Got it?”
The corners of his mouth twitch up in a faint smile, “Yes ma’am.”
“Good. And now go pick a movie. I’m not going to repeat myself again.”
Noah eventually manages to settle on something he wants to watch. Fellowship of the Ring, a shared favourite. You sit with your back against the headboard, with Noah curled up so that he can rest his head in your lap. Noah looks a little more like a snoozing puppy than your thirty-year-old boyfriend. He still shifts too much for you to think that he’s properly asleep yet.
You carefully move a stray piece of hair out of his face.
Noah slowly turns to look at you, his eyes all soft.
“Getting sleepy?” you ask, still playing with his hair.
He nods, barely managing to stifle his yawn.
You turn down the volume of your film just a little more, so that it can fade into the background while you doze off. Noah reluctantly moves away from his previous position. He flops down on the pillow next to yours. He watches as you switch off the last few lights around the room. He scoots in close as soon as you’re resting next to him again.
“How about we sleep in tomorrow and get a late breakfast?” you ask, shuffling a little closer to him too.
“I’d like that.” Noah replies quietly.
“We can see how we feel about it tomorrow, hm? No pressure to do anything.”
You place your hand against his cheeks once again, softly stroking your thumb across his skin. Noah’s eyes flutter shut, in response to your touch.
“I want to do something nice with you. You came all this way to see me and I don’t want us to be stuck in a hotel room just because I’m feeling a little poorly.”
You quickly shake your head, “We don’t have to do anything. I came here for you and not the sights. If we can manage to do a few fun things before we go home, that’s nice but if we don’t, that’s good too. We can always have a little breakfast date back home.”
“I want to try at least.” he says firmly, “For you.”
“Then we’ll try.” You lean in to kiss him so very gently, “Trying is enough.”
“Thank you for coming.” Noah whispers then, “You don’t know how much I missed having you around.”
“How about next time I just come with you from the start?”
“You’d do that?”
“Of course. Noah I’m in the position where I can move from everywhere. I can just come with you if it makes things easier for you. And I’ll do it so, so gladly. Okay?”
“Okay.” He mirrors quietly.
“Good. And now let’s get some rest. You’ve had a long day.”
Noah lets out a little grumble, before he shuffles in just a little closer.
He won’t stay this close all night, but you know that he likes being all pressed up against you while he dozes off. His arms wrap around your middle, holding you as close as he can. You’re starting to feel yourself drift off too. Before your eyes fall shut, you press a kiss to the top of his head.
With Noah wrapped all around you, you come to the conclusion that you’d do absolutely everything to make sure that this boy is as happy as he can be. You haven’t talked about it, but by now you’re sure that he’s it for you. You can’t picture yourself with anyone else and really, why would you. No one has ever made you feel more loved than he has, and all you want to do in return is make sure that he feels just as loved as you do.
Maybe it is time to have that conversation after all.
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I’m going insane over these smiles
