Reading

I read a lot. I sometimes keep track of what I read here.

[whatshouldwecallgradschool]

WHEN I SIT AT MY DESK SO LONG MOTION SENSOR LIGHTS TURN OFF

credit: theplacewherethingsgo

[gemmacorrell]

[sashareads-blog]

“Just swim in your own lane,” he said. Seeing my confusion, he told me that he had been on the swimming team at Stanford. His stroke was as good as anyone’s. But he kept coming in second. “Zeller,” the coach said, “your problem is you keep looking around to see how the other guys are doing. Keep your eyes on your own lane, swim your fastest and you’ll win.”

Eileen Pollack, in the New York Times, in Why Are There Still So Few Women in Science? 

[wtfplus]

hey ! i need your opinions !

how do you guys feel about the good number of people who post in fatshion tags who wear sizes that don’t necessitate plus size clothing/wear sizes that are like… US 10-14?

i generally err on the side of being inclusive, but i sorta feel like entertaining the idea...

[sashareads-blog]

I guess I'm a "small fat," and I love this and other "fatshion" and fat activist blogs, because they're feminist in a way that I really connect with. The overarching message is, there is nothing wrong or shameful about your body. Don't apologize for it, and fuck trying to modify it to fit society's norms. Show it off, if you want. Express yourself however you damn well want to.

I feel like I belong in communities where that's the message, but if the communities are targeting actual fat people who wear plus sized clothes, I belong more as an observer who sits back and listens than as an active participant. 

[sashareads-blog]

Fundamentally, you can't solve social problems with technology.

Quinn Norton in a piece by Paul Mason on hatred of women in tech.

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The Secret Garden is a pleasant book about a bunch of racists who are convinced that living in the windy moors of England somehow cures disease.

Jaya Saxena at The Toast

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It’s hard not to feel humorless as a woman and a feminist, to recognize misogyny in so many forms, some great and some small, and know you’re not imagining things. It’s hard to be told to lighten up because if you lighten up any more, you’re going to float the fuck away. The problem is not that one of these things is happening, it’s that they are all happening, concurrently and constantly.

Roxane Gay

[sashareads-blog]

But making fun of “the girl who thinks she’s Sylvia Plath” is making fun of the girl who takes her inner life seriously; seriously enough to write about it, in some pretty stark terms, without feeling embarrassed. They don’t just mock Plath herself—they mock the idea that she could inspire teenage girls, specifically, to write the truth about their own lives.

Sady Doyle in Rookie Mag

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Irony is, of course, the last vestige of modern crypto-misogyny: all those lazy stereotypes and hurtful put-downs are definitely a joke, right up until they aren’t, and clearly you need a man to tell you when and if you’re supposed to take sexism seriously.

Laurie Penny

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The question is not really when life begins. The question is whether we recognize women and other people with uteri as humans whose lives have intrinsic value and the rights of agency, bodily autonomy, and consent. It is only because such a vast swath of our population cannot or will not answer a resounding and unqualified "yes" to that question that there is even space for a reprehensible debate about when life begins.

Melissa McEwan, being amazing as usual.

[sonofbaldwin]

Handkerchiefs

Supreme Court Justice Kennedy sees the humanity in gay people, but not in black people. If only some black people were white. I guess Clarence Thomas, Allen West, Condoleeza Rice, and Herman Cain didn’t put enough handkerchiefs on their heads to get us a pass. #YouCantVote #ButYouCanGetMarried

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In mathematics, you don't understand things, you just get used to them.

John von Neumann

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Projecting a cheerfulness you don’t feel saps energy and effort. It is draining to constantly arrange your features like a bouquet for the male gaze.

Katy Waldman on "Bitchy Resting Face"

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I shouldn't need to say this, but there is a problem if racist epithets come to your mind when you're angry. And that problem is that you have granted yourself permission to use those epithets. The idea that we only use epithets if we say them aloud, directed at someone to whom they apply, is bullshit. If you're using them to redirect your anger at another human being's individual behavior into an expression of hatred for their race, you're still using epithets. In your head, under your breath, in the intimate space between you and your spouse—it doesn't matter. This shit is in your lexicon because you've allowed yourself to believe that these words, and the monolithizing thoughts of hatred they represent, are justified in certain circumstances.

Melissa McEwan, being eloquent and correct as usual.

[whatshouldwecallgradschool]

WHEN IT FEELS LIKE I'VE BEEN IN GRAD SCHOOL FOREVER

[talesofscienceandlove]

Give until you just cant give anymore, then give more, then about a year later, you’ll graduate! Write the dissertation!

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oh. delightful.

[everyoneisgay]

Dear friend,

I’m writing to tell you, among other things, that I am super gay. This may or may not come as a surprise to you. If it does: Surprise! If it does not: You were right all along! Either way: Hooray!

I didn’t want to come out. I don’t want coming out to be a thing that anyone has to do.

A short list of things I’d rather be doing than “thinking about being gay” includes (but is not limited to) writing a song, reading a book, climbing a tree, dancing a jig, and watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the zillionth time. Don’t get me wrong - I think it is in the best interest of everyone to strive for a greater understanding of the self. I just wish that being gay (or transgender, or asexual, or fill-in-the-blank here) was as unremarkable to the masses as being left-handed or blonde.

In a perfect world, nobody would have to experience any of the negative side-effects of figuring out that you’re gay, which can include feeling confused, shameful, afraid, lost, or alone. In a perfect world, everyone could just like who they like, and get on with it.

Spoiler alert: We do not live in a perfect world.

I began to realize that I was interested in girls in junior high. At first, it made me uncomfortable. I grew up in a fairly rural, conservative town. I knew exactly one kid who was out at school, and he was harassed on a daily basis. I had always sort of liked feeling different from most of the kids at school – you know, poetry over football and whatnot. But I didn’t want to be THAT different. 

My feelings were further complicated by my religious upbringing. My family attended a born-again style church which taught (as many churches do) that homosexuality is a sin. The price of that sin, should you find yourself unable to turn away from it, was to burn in a pit of fiery torment for all eternity. I was an impressionable kid, and hell was advertised to me as very real - and very likely, if I didn’t watch my step. I internalized these ideas as a child and as I grew, they grew with me.

But other growth was happening simultaneously. Over time I got more comfortable with myself, lost a few friends, and made some new ones.When I began my journey as a musician, I decided that I didn’t want to publicly address my sexuality. I didn’t think it was a big deal, or relevant to my job in any way. I also worried that the first word people would associate with me was going to be “gay” instead of “musician.” I didn’t want a non-musical part of myself overshadowing the musical part. Plus I figured it wasn’t anybody’s business.

I still maintain that it is not anybody’s business. I don’t think anyone should have to feel an obligation to come out. I don’t think that outing people is cool. I think every person has the right to privacy, and should be able to share themselves with their friends, their family, and the world at their own pace, in their own time. However, I’ve come to realize in recent months that a big part of my desire to hide this aspect of myself was rooted in those dusty old feelings: that there is something wrong, something bad, something less-than about being gay.

It brings me no pleasure to admit to you that I have felt these feelings. I want to appear strong, because I feel strong now. But at the same time I know it is important - perhaps even the whole point of writing this thing - to make myself vulnerable. Because I know that there are human beings out in the world who understand these feelings but cannot give them a name. I want to tell you that it’s okay to feel messed up. Feeling messed up is a part of life, but it is not the only part. And the only way out of that feeling is through.

This summer I am going to marry my fiancé. Her name is Kristin Russo and she is one half of the team behind EveryoneIsGay.com. Having a firsthand view of the work that she and Dannielle do has been inspiring, and has also made me think more critically about my decision. What kind of a message does it send to a teenager when I avoid a question about my sexuality? Whatever the answer, I’m confident that it is no longer a message I am comfortable sending.

I think it is damaging and isolating for young people to look out into the world and not see a representation of their experience. To encounter others who are like you is to know that you are not alone. Even if you never meet them in real life, these representatives help to contextualize you – they are proof that you are part of something.

You are not an anomaly. You are not a mistake.

I am thankful that in recent years, it has become a bit more common for people from all walks of life to step forward and identify themselves as human beings who also happen to be gay. I am proud to offer my voice to that expanding chorus.

Love,

Jenny

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omg I am fangirling a lot about this!!!

[sashareads-blog]

If the government assigned you a grocery card that tracked all your food purchases, it would seem like something out of a dystopian everybody-in-a-jumpsuit movie. But when your grocery store does it in return for a dollar off a bottle of salad dressing, that's an absolutely everyday occurrence for many of us.

Linda Holmes