thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press āsendā
thanks for your interest: whyād you have to bring this up
would you be so kind: fucking do it
best: i have never physically met you
all best: this conversation is over
all my best: i wish you would die
happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox
i hope this helps: iāve done all iām willing to do
i did a bit of research: i googled it, because youāre too lazy to
sorry to chase: answer my email
so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email
i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me
please contact my colleague: this isnāt my problem
iām copying in my colleague: this isnāt my problem and i am thrilled about it
iāll check and get back to you: i might forget to
iāll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to
can you check back with me in a week?: iām hoping you will forget to
per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone
great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone
thanks!: iām not mad at you
thanks!!: please donāt be mad at me
thanks!!!: iām crying at my desk
please advise: this might be your fault
kindly advise: this is entirely your fault
mind if i swing by?: iām already in the elevator
can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email
sorry if that was unclear: i think youāre an idiot
let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again
Reblogging to add a direct quote that I used today -
Please respect my work process: just do it the way I told you to and stop arguing with me, I donāt care what you think