Actual Husbando

Welcome to the Show. Snapchat: Godsboxers / Insta: Satanstrouserstv / Youtube: Satanstrouserstv / Twitter: Satanstrousers

[contemptible-scoundrel]

[doesn't understand jacking off] and I'm supposed to... touch my penis? [shaking my head and smiling, murmuring to myself] touching my own penis... [chuckles] what will they come up with next

[simicmimic]

[cash4bees]

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes

[ryebreadgf]

once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out

[elexecution]

if i was born 500 years ago i would have been speculating that the two dudes who went to get firewood together were fucking

[neaborealis]

chat, how long do y’all think 500 years is. Romeo and Juliet was written in the 1500s. 500 years is not the Stone Age.

[elexecution]

why do u think people stopped collecting firewood after caveman times

[imsobadatnicknames2]

Many such cases

[briancolfermoved-deactivated201]

penis

penisn’t

[indigo-halo-deactivated20181213]

vagina

vagouta

[docprofsmith]

anus

anyou

[quo-fomo]

blowjob

blowunemployed

[babemaggot]

fuck fmeck

[johnnysmissingass-deactivated20]

😭😭😭

[your-dewey-decimal-number-is]

793.85

card tricks

[kaida427]

what's the dewey decimal number for foreskin. coward

[your-dewey-decimal-number-is]

611.642

the prepuce (aka foreskin)

is a simple "please" too much to ask?

[kaida427]

prostrating myself at your feet for my lack of composure thank you for your wisdom

[your-dewey-decimal-number-is]

179.92

forgiveness

[dorothygale]

pop health science is so annoying bc it'll be like "did you know? eating strawberries will give you mega cancer" and you're like pfft whatever begone influencer. but sometimes then you'll see a reasonably credible article like "Study Shows Possible Link Between Strawberries and Mega Cancer" and you're not usually the type to follow that kind of thing religiously but idk maybe you should consider not eating strawberries? but then there's another article saying "Strawberry/Mega Cancer Study Debunked" and it turns out the original study had a sample size of 3 and was funded by Big Blueberry, and strawberries may have a small connection to mega cancer but only if you are genetically predisposed to mega cancer and eat 50 strawberries every day. so you return to your strawberry eating life. but whenever you eat strawberries in public someone tells you about the mega cancer.

[satanstrousers]

Just referred to the client as "the enemy team"

[cobythinks]

Dead wife montage but it's all slow motion shots of your dead wife throwing grenades and doing backflips and oneshotting the enemy with their long range weapons

[hozierswift]

clicking 'stay signed in'-buttons used to mean that u would stay signed in

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

Starting a collection

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[definitely-not-lordenglish]

[home-and-having-tea]

[satanstrousers]

Anyone who thinks the horseshoe theory is real hasn't engaged with enough nazis

[dogpuppy]

[dogpuppy]

[easel-eisel]

are you mad that the villain identified me as the most impactful party member to mind control

[ghosttumbl]

@satanstrousers Evhan every time we fight mind flayers

[satanstrousers]

When you make a 27 AC Golem PC with an intelligence of 9, what you're really doing is gifting your DM a secret mini-boss whenever they feel like it @the-dice-hag

[tredlocity]

there’s a twitter account where this guy thinks every tweet is directed at him and it’s great

[famicom]

this is how everyone on this website acts

[bluwubewwy]

Thats not true i dont think i act like this

[freesiadotcom]

having 40 minutes to leave the house is terrible because 40 minutes is basically 30 minutes and 30 minutes is basically 20 minutes and 20 minutes is basically fifteen seconds. but 50 minutes? 50 minutes is an hour, and an hour? ooobh thats plany off time