I read your latest chapter and I saw you got engaged, congratulations that's quite exciting!!!
In other questions are there any tidbits or insights you'd like to share about "This Time Around?"
Yess! Thank you š„° Iām getting married on the 25th! Then Iāll be able to get back to writing~
Hmmā¦ as for something about This Time Aroundā¦ I guess I would say that I didnāt expect that one of the big themes of this story (having to choose between the family you were raised in and the person you want to be with) ended up being way more relevant to my life than I expected it to lol
And having entered my first serious relationship midway through this story has offered me more insight to the realities of loving someone. I hope that I am able to include this new understanding in the way I write Childe and Zhongliās relationship going forward once they are able to push through their terrible past and get their second chance.
im obsessed with the way you write eruri and the 21 century reincarnation au was just *chefs kiss* these boys deserve some happiness youre a fantastic writer
Moonlight streams through the open window where Levi sits, sipping tea and looking out at the stars. Erwin appreciates the calm silence that has descended upon them after a long evening of discussing missions and tactics. He, too, gazes at the heavens which have caught Leviās rapt attention, but his eyes keep straying to those moonlit features seated in the window.
And then the silence is broken by Leviās voice, uncharacteristically soft and hesitant. The change alerts Erwin that they are about to breach into a more personal territory.
āFor those in the underground, if they could have one wish, it would be to live freely under this night skyā¦ā
The porcelain teacup hovers against those lips as they ponder which words to speak next. Erwin waits for whatever he has to say, for he can tell Leviās had this on his mind for a while now. He runs that first statement through his mind again. And Erwin sees the painful truth. Itās as if Levi got his wish, but at the cost of everything he holds dear. Erwinās own goals come to mind, but before he can dive into the rabbit hole of weighing the prize with its cost, Levi finds his next words.
Ā āYour desire to uncover the truths of this world are similar. I suppose.. itās why Iām drawn to you.ā He takes a sip of his tea. āSay, Erwinā¦ If you knew your wish could never come true, what would you wish for instead?ā
Itās strange to hear Levi speak of desires and wishes. At first, Erwin doesnāt know how to answer the question. For as long as he could remember, heād only desired one thing: knowledge.Ā
Heās on the verge of teasing Levi about losing faith in his commander, when, for the final and unignorable time, his eyes catch on the otherās pale skin framed by that midnight dark hairā¦ Oh.
There is one more thing he desires from this world. If heās being honest, heās known it for a while.
Before wisdom can catch up with his mouth, it betrays him. āIām afraid my second wish is about as far out of reach as the first,ā he utters.Ā
And he should hide his face, shove his emotions back into the corner they belong in, but Levi is already turned to look at him to inquire his meaning. And Erwin knows his eyes tell all, because Leviās eyes grow wide in comprehension.
Erwin braces himself for a violent reaction of disgust. Instead, there is the soft clink of the teacup being set on the window ledge as Levi rises from his perch.
Erwin sits up straighter in the chair heād been leaning upon the back of as Levi crosses the distance between them. The manās unreadable eyes make Erwin wary as much asĀ they also excite him. Levi doesnāt stop until heās standing right in front of him and Erwin is forced to crane his neck to keep eye contact. Even seated as he is, Leviās face still isnāt very far up there. Especially with the way heās leaning down towards-
Erwinās brain stutters to a halt as Leviās breath ghosts over his lips. But Levi stops there, gaze switching back and forth between Erwinās eyes.
After a moment, Erwinās brain reboots itself and he realizes Levi is dangling his wish right in front of him. Eyes, silver in the moonlight, challenge him to reach out and take, take.
And so he stretches upwards and closes the distance, a mere soft brush of lips. His hand finds its way up to brush the pad of his thumb lightly over one of those pale cheeks. And then heās pulling back. Heās not sure why he was allowed this gift, and heās afraid it will only cause him to want even more. So he pulls away, a small smile on his lips.
Levi leans back as well and blinks. He appears confused. āWell thatās not exactly what I was expecting.āĀ
Erwin doesnāt know what to make of it. āYou... werenāt expecting my affection?āĀ
āWellā¦ with the way you were looking at me.. I just thought..ā Levi glances away, finding the floorboards more interesting than his awkward explanation. āI didnāt expect that kind of kiss. I expected, well.. never mind.ā
Erwin doesnāt think heās ever seen Levi flustered before. His face has gone beet red. Leave it to Levi to offer himself up without a second thought, but then get shy when there are feelings involved.
Erwin tilts his head as he examines Levi, who has started walking towards the door, embarrassed scowl on his face. He stops to pick up his discarded shirt and thatās when Erwin notices the tent in Leviās pants.Ā
Blood immediately rushes south as Erwin realizes the full extent of what Levi had expected to happen.
Afraid that heād let the moment slip away, Erwin nearly knocks his chair over in his rush to be out of it. Just before he reaches him, Leviās eyes look up from where he was fastening the first button. They widen at whatever he sees on Erwinās face just before his hands are pried from his shirt and he is pushed backwards into the wall.Ā
āWha-?ā His words cut off into a groan by Erwinās thick bulge grinding against him.
āSorry Iām slow when it countsā¦ This must be what you were expecting?ā
He doesnāt give Levi time to answer as he slots their mouths together. Heās rough, and everything that he gives, Levi gives right back to him. Erwin grinds against him, pushing that smaller frame into the wall, and itās all so intoxicating. Too intoxicating. Each kiss.. each push of their hips together feels like a dose of poison. Because after this, Erwin knows he will be a dying man, and Levi, his only antidote. He forces himself to break away. Levi releases his lips begrudgingly, giving a confused grunt of complaint.
āYou want me, right?ā Levi pants, āIām yours.ā
Erwin sucks in a breath, holding back. āLevi, I donāt want to do this if youāre only doing it out of some sense of pity or feeling like you owe me. I want all of you. Not just your body.ā
Again, he prepares himself for a rejection.. to be laughed at. And Levi does laugh. However, it is not mocking. Itās soft, and slightly exasperated as Levi says, āYeah, I got that from your first kiss, dumbass.ā He punctuates his remark with a swipe of his tongue up the column of Erwinās throat.Ā
āLike I said, Iām yours.ā
Erwinās breathing hitches as a shiver runs through his body, and in the next moment, a button bounces across the floorboards as Leviās shirt is ripped from his body.Ā
He makes quick work of undoing the drawstring of Leviās pants before divesting himself of his own.Ā
From there, it is a battle fought between their rush and the need to be slow. For neither of them had been prepared for such an act this night, but both were incapable of waiting a moment longer than necessary.Ā
When Erwin finally breaches Leviās walls, it is not easily accomplished. Urged on by Leviās insistence that it happen now, he somehow manages to fit the spit-slicked head of his large cock into that tight space.Ā
Braced against the unforgiving wall by the insistent push of Erwinās hips, Levi gasps in a potent mixture of discomfort and pleasure.Ā
Sensing that discomfort, Erwin attempts to withdraw, but Levi grasps onto him, holding him in place.
āDonāt stop,ā the smaller man barely growls. His eyes pry themselves open and bore into Erwinās, daring him to deny him any longer.Ā
A familiar thrill runs through Erwin in response. Just like the day they first met, a wicked grin splits his lips beyond his control. His admiration and carnal lust for this man dig themselves out of the hole he had long since buried them in, and Erwin pushes forward, burying himself inside of Levi as far as he can go.Ā
Heās careful, aware that all things break. But he dares not stop. He canāt.Ā
Just as Levi has given all of himself to Erwin, Erwin gives all of himself in return. He gives and he gives and he gives. Leviās muffled cries of pleasure reward each thrust until he has nothing left to give.Ā
Together, they reach their end, although it is not truly an end. Not yet. Erwin holds Levi tightly to him for as long as he can. For he, of all people, knows that in this world, all things eventually break.
