sav's personal whooo @savandherdumbfuckingthoughts - Tumblr Blog

i should eat. i havent eaten since yesterday lmao......

#but also i could: not do that #i should starve myself!!!!! yea

leopiked-deactivated20190202

are you ever Almost Okay and then somebody says one minorly upsetting thing and ur just ‘welp im inferior and impossible to love.’

i just want to be gorgeous and successful

also i wish i knew how to put what im feeling about this situation into words but i cant and now i feel like im just. stuck.

like i feel like i shouldn’t have to force other people to be in my presence. it must be very insulting to them, to be around someone as gross as me. and im sorry.

sometimes i forget that im so ugly that other ppl looking at my face should be a punishment

all I do is bring bad vibes

I just love fuckin up

I feel like I have to punish myself by not eating. like I'm such a fuvk up I don't deserve to feel full.

I wish I didn't hate my body so much. Like my face??? ugly yea but its manageable with makeup at least. everything from the neck down??? hopeless.

"conventionally attractive people are boring" I know. I know they are. but they are at a level of boring beautifulness that EVERYONE finds attractive I want everyone to think I'm beautiful and if being boring will get me there then... idk. I hate this. I wish I didn't care what other people thought. I wish I didn't feel the need to appeal visually to everyone. I'm so fucking TIRED OF THIS

I wish I didn't have bdd I feel like it ruins everything in my life. it ruins all my relationships all my friendships everything. i can't go anywhere with people without it fucking something up I can't even be online browsing tumblr or Facebook or anything without something like. triggering me. and it's so exhausting Im so tired of this. I'm so tired of feeling this way and needing validation and then not believing it anyways. I'm not beautiful. I'm not sexy. I'm not attractive. and I never will be.

gemini

I wanna be beautiful and 3 inches taller

#mostly the beautiful part but #yeah

i drank too much at applebees and now im just sitting in this hotel thinking about how repulsive i am lmao i cant wrap my head around the words on describing exactly how i feel about myself but

it’s. not Good. so.

i just? i wish.

#i wish i could believe what other people say about me #i wish i could believe someone when they say i dont look like the equivalent of fat nasty trash #i dont know a single person who has BDD who i can talk to this about and relate with them #how do people fucking live with this im slowly going insane #i cant do this forever

i hate how i ruin family vacations because my parents want to take photos of me/with me and i let them and then have to check the photo to make sure it looks okay and it Never looks okay and i make them delete it and then dont let them take any more photos of me for the rest of the day and then the cycle repeats the next day:

parents take photo

i see how ugly i am in the photo

i get upset and ruin the mood and everyone’s day

wash rinse re-fucking-peat

i hate myself. im so ugly and ffat and i dont deserve to be touched or loved. im like a lard filled poison. my body is something so foul it doesn’t even deserve to be looked at. im an embarrassment. why would someone willingly choose me over literally ANY ONE else on this planet? how is it physically possible to find me attractive in any way??

its’ not. it’s fucking not possible. the end.

yoonswife

me whenever i look at everyone: why am i the only ugly person

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